The advice thread for random problems #5

[yogiessexdubs]

Thanks I appreciate it! I will try to contact them tomorrow and explain. Feel awful as it’s a local business salon and the hairdresser is so lovely.

Bless you, it happens & I’m sure they’ll see how genuine you are!
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Whilst I’m on this thread I thought I’d post & not keep this bottled in.
I sleep in a conversion with a very thin wall partitioned between myself the neighbour. For months the neighbour’s son (well I had thought it was him) has been super noisy, playing music etc. I’ve banged on the wall (ugh I know - & I said this to her) but as it’s not my property haven’t taken it any further.
Today I went & knocked (hate confrontation but had to be done) as they were waking me up at 05:00 with music.
Welllllllll, I was nice as pie & explained. Both parents come to the door saying ‘oh it’s not my children’ (well they’re the only neighbours soooo .. also turns out they have 3 teenage children) I came away relieved I’d said my piece.
Justtttt now (at almost 21:00) she’s come around saying ‘it’s def not my children, I’ve checked this/that’ super aggressive.
I was like ‘right okay, thank you, goodbye’. Utter chavs.

 

[Snippysnips]

I just realised I missed my hair appointment this past weekend and I feel sick with guilt. What would you guys do? I think they have a cancellation policy whereby a charge is issued if you fail to cancel within 24 hours but I have not received this. I realise I had a missed call but hadn’t noticed that either with such a busy week. I feel so bad and embarrassed!
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Just to add I’ve never missed one before and have been going there a while now every 8 weeks or so for services.

Just be honest an say you genuinely forgot about it, I've had clients phone me up just before they are due to come in saying they have forgotten an can no longer make it, or I've phoned them asking where they are only to be told that it completely slipped their mind, it doesn't bother us as it can happen, the only time my coworkers get angry about it is if it's constantly happening

 

[becca7721]

I just realised I missed my hair appointment this past weekend and I feel sick with guilt. What would you guys do? I think they have a cancellation policy whereby a charge is issued if you fail to cancel within 24 hours but I have not received this. I realise I had a missed call but hadn’t noticed that either with such a busy week. I feel so bad and embarrassed!
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Just to add I’ve never missed one before and have been going there a while now every 8 weeks or so for services.

If you’ve been going there awhile they probably realised it was a mistake.

I’d pop in and explain and offer to pay as per cancellation policy, they may or may not want you to pay but you offering will I’m sure mean a lot; if that’s not possible then phone them and do it that way. Businesses can be understanding of life happening and forgetting stuff.

 

[JoeBloggs]

@havee I have been thinking more about your situation and I think you need to engage with your mum about ensuring she can advocate for herself. You're dad is abusing her by putting things solely in her name that she cannot understand nor is able to do. Though if they are taking his income into account he must be on the tenancy in some capacity.

If she is any good with a smartphone, introduce her to google translate. She can take a photo of any letters and it will translate if for her. I am sure if you also made the council aware they needed to be in a different language they could do that.

There might also be charities within your culture that she can get help so it does not always fall on your shoulders.

 

[tomato_paste]

I just realised I missed my hair appointment this past weekend and I feel sick with guilt. What would you guys do? I think they have a cancellation policy whereby a charge is issued if you fail to cancel within 24 hours but I have not received this. I realise I had a missed call but hadn’t noticed that either with such a busy week. I feel so bad and embarrassed!
---
Just to add I’ve never missed one before and have been going there a while now every 8 weeks or so for services.

Happened to me with a doctors appt recently (super embarrassing, I overslept ) and in my experience, honesty is the best policy. A genuine apology goes a really long way, and accepting if they give you a cancellation fee without fuss also does. (Honestly, most businesses only do that because there are so many entitled dickheads out there that simply don't give a tit and will ruin your business by not showing up.) All will be well, I promise.

 

[TwooTwooTwitTwitTwoo]

Happened to me with a doctors appt recently (super embarrassing, I overslept ) and in my experience, honesty is the best policy. A genuine apology goes a really long way, and accepting if they give you a cancellation fee without fuss also does. (Honestly, most businesses only do that because there are so many entitled dickheads out there that simply don't give a tit and will ruin your business by not showing up.) All will be well, I promise.

I'd also add to this that you need to forgive yourself too and let go of the guilt. Don't make it bigger than it is.



I'm a bit of a perfectionist and I've realised over the years that means I put a lot of pressure on myself to be spot on all of the time. I completely understand your stress about missing it. I'd be mortified to the point I'd work myself up quite badly about it but... take a breath. It's not the end of the world and people understand that people have stuff going on. Just brace yourself and ring and apologise. It will be ok.

 

[Thank(space)you]

Where I live atm (private rent) is very cheap for the area, and therefore I cannot afford to find somewhere else to private rent.

Does anyone know if I go to the council & explain issues I'm having in my house, if I'd be eligible for homefinder?

I have a young child, single mum working part time.

The issues are: black mould in the kitchen which landlord has said is due to not properly insulating it. Pipe being held together with duct tape. Water leaks through the floor into kitchen (from bathroom floor through to kitchen ceiling and down kitchen walls) damp in the living room (to the point i have flowers growing on the wall inside the house), rotting, broken skirting boards.

Thanks if you got that far!

 

[becca7721]

If a person was given eviction notice and it expired (april this year) can landlord then use that to apply to court now or do they need to do another one? I’ve been looking, putting in as much effort as I can, but last six months been extremely difficult.

 

[Thank(space)you]

If a person was given eviction notice and it expired (april this year) can landlord then use that to apply to court now or do they need to do another one? I’ve been looking, putting in as much effort as I can, but last six months been extremely difficult.

They'll have to give you a new one I think

 

[becca7721]

They'll have to give you a new one I think

Thanks. Don’t worry I won’t quote you if you’re wrong (even though I have quote you here )

 

[cowtastrophe]

Where I live atm (private rent) is very cheap for the area, and therefore I cannot afford to find somewhere else to private rent.

Does anyone know if I go to the council & explain issues I'm having in my house, if I'd be eligible for homefinder?

I have a young child, single mum working part time.

The issues are: black mould in the kitchen which landlord has said is due to not properly insulating it. Pipe being held together with duct tape. Water leaks through the floor into kitchen (from bathroom floor through to kitchen ceiling and down kitchen walls) damp in the living room (to the point i have flowers growing on the wall inside the house), rotting, broken skirting boards.

Thanks if you got that far!

Have you spoken to Shelter? They will be able to direct you. It sounds horrendous and I hope you get something sorted out.

 

[griftalo]

Where I live atm (private rent) is very cheap for the area, and therefore I cannot afford to find somewhere else to private rent.

Does anyone know if I go to the council & explain issues I'm having in my house, if I'd be eligible for homefinder?

I have a young child, single mum working part time.

The issues are: black mould in the kitchen which landlord has said is due to not properly insulating it. Pipe being held together with duct tape. Water leaks through the floor into kitchen (from bathroom floor through to kitchen ceiling and down kitchen walls) damp in the living room (to the point i have flowers growing on the wall inside the house), rotting, broken skirting boards.

Thanks if you got that far!

Contact the health and safety to come round and look at it. They can force them to repair. Is the landlord saying insulating is to blame and that was YOUR responsibility?? It sounds worse than where I used to rent and that house nearly killed me with pneumonia.

 

[JoeBloggs]

Where I live atm (private rent) is very cheap for the area, and therefore I cannot afford to find somewhere else to private rent.

Does anyone know if I go to the council & explain issues I'm having in my house, if I'd be eligible for homefinder?

I have a young child, single mum working part time.

The issues are: black mould in the kitchen which landlord has said is due to not properly insulating it. Pipe being held together with duct tape. Water leaks through the floor into kitchen (from bathroom floor through to kitchen ceiling and down kitchen walls) damp in the living room (to the point i have flowers growing on the wall inside the house), rotting, broken skirting boards.

Thanks if you got that far!

Report it to environmental health, they will issue an enforcement notice to your landlord.

 

[didisaythatoutloudoops]

Helped a close friend find a new job - one they found and wanted. Helped them with their CV, cover letter, prepping for the interview. They were offered the job and from the minute they got the offer, it's been non-stop moan - moaning the salary is £150 less a month than their previous job (it was a fixed-term contract), moaning it's not the kind of job they wanted, moaning about the sector, etc. They've been in the job two days and you'd swear they're being forced to sweep chimneys from dawn to dusk with how negative their attitude is.

I'm trying my best to support them but it feels like a kick in the teeth after all the help I put in. I get starting a new job is hard (I started a new one six months ago). I get it sucks when the pay is less considering the cost of living. I get new IT stuff is difficult but they're also making little effort to actually proactively fixing it (such as contacting their new IT contact for help).

I'm getting so frustrated over their negativity - they have not one nice thing to say - and how they just want to constantly vent to me. But they can be very touchy and sensitive to being confronted and I don't want to lose the friendship for a number of reasons. Any advice on how to cheer up a negative Nelly in this situation?

 

[Former_Antelopee]

Helped a close friend find a new job - one they found and wanted. Helped them with their CV, cover letter, prepping for the interview. They were offered the job and from the minute they got the offer, it's been non-stop moan - moaning the salary is £150 less a month than their previous job (it was a fixed-term contract), moaning it's not the kind of job they wanted, moaning about the sector, etc. They've been in the job two days and you'd swear they're being forced to sweep chimneys from dawn to dusk with how negative their attitude is.

I'm trying my best to support them but it feels like a kick in the teeth after all the help I put in. I get starting a new job is hard (I started a new one six months ago). I get it sucks when the pay is less considering the cost of living. I get new IT stuff is difficult but they're also making little effort to actually proactively fixing it (such as contacting their new IT contact for help).

I'm getting so frustrated over their negativity - they have not one nice thing to say - and how they just want to constantly vent to me. But they can be very touchy and sensitive to being confronted and I don't want to lose the friendship for a number of reasons. Any advice on how to cheer up a negative Nelly in this situation?

I'd just ignore all the negative comments about it and try and change the convo tbh or just give a one off statement written in different ways if she keeps bringing it up like 'hopefully you'll feel better about it once you have been there a while' 'you'll get used to it and it'll get better' 'give it some time if you don't like it after there's always other jobs you can apply for'.
My friends always negative and I just CBA to be supportive that often as it's just constant so now I just give basic statements a lot of the time. Tbh a lot of the time I just ignore her messages asking for help because I'm busy and I can't do anything about what she wants help with anyway then by the time I reply she's sorted. She annoys me as I'll ask her questions or start a convo about something and she'll completely ignore what I said for days and then ask for help so I CBA to help if your not going to even answer me/have a normal convo . Sorry this kinda derailed my answer and turned into my own rant

 

[griftalo]

Report it to environmental health, they will issue an enforcement notice to your landlord.

Environmental health was the department I was struggling to name

 

[NoHintOfDrama]

Report it to environmental health, they will issue an enforcement notice to your landlord.

My husband did this many years ago before we got married and he rented. Council sent the enforcement notice and then the landlord served him with a notice to quit so he could ‘do the works’, just something to bear in mind.

 

[Hastaggifted]

I got a speeding ticket (I know, I know) and it said send back within 28 days or £1000 fine and other stuff. Filled it out, my husband said he'd post it. Fine.
Ive just found it in the car. 28 days is tomorrow. I've shoved it in the post box with a first class stamp on. Am I going to get a £1000 fine?! Can / should i call them?!
I've been driving 15 years and never had a speeding ticket.
I haven't got £1000

 

[littlepup]

I got a speeding ticket (I know, I know) and it said send back within 28 days or £1000 fine and other stuff. Filled it out, my husband said he'd post it. Fine.
Ive just found it in the car. 28 days is tomorrow. I've shoved it in the post box with a first class stamp on. Am I going to get a £1000 fine?! Can / should i call them?!
I've been driving 15 years and never had a speeding ticket.
I haven't got £1000

Are you in England? The maximum fine for speeding is £100?

ETA- just realised you meant if it goes to court.
I’m sure if you’ve sent it today you’ll be fine but you could just follow it with a call. Better to make a call than risk it being escalated.

 

[Hastaggifted]

Are you in England? The maximum fine for speeding is £100?

It's the "if you don't return the form within 28 days" fine, not the speeding fine