Mrs Hinch #281 Soph your decorations are utter tat, and you’re STILL not Postman Pat.

[Cocomoco]

That tree looks wonkier than my ex’s dick

 

[under the ivy]

Ron on the potty after Zophs pine’d and dettol sprayed it


ETA : I posted this in the last thread but this GIF cracks me up

 

[HereForTheComments456]

Why do Ronnie and Henry have to be running out of a room? It’s like she’s making a really shit action movie

 

[Couldlifeeverbesaneagain]

Genuinely never known a kid with so much personalised stuff. I was lucky if I could find a hairband with my name on it back in the 90s!

Chav at heart, ay Soph.

 

[shadyessex33]

“With the presents around the tree. If that makes sense?”

What actual fucking part of that wouldn’t make sense you massive haemorrhoid!

 

[Cucumber and eggs]

Thread suggestion

On the first day of xmas Mrs Hinch gave to me, absolutely nothing unless she's payed a fee

 

[shadyessex33]

Guyshhhh I’m just about to dish up a full Pork roast dinner. I’ve cooked it from scratch, not an aunt Bessie in sight! And guess what? I wasn’t up all night worrying about cooking it because
A) I’m not a fucking dickhead
B) I have a proper Mum who taught me how to live independently

 

[HenryHenchcliffe]

Now this is Christmas decorating

 

[shadyessex33]

So according to her last month the child was so naughty he was the devil reincarnate. So much so she said it several times on live tv.

Now all of a sudden he’s an angel who needs telling “no” once and he’s good as gold?

Stop lying so much! It’s not good for your blind followers and it certainly isn’t good for your own CHILD! One day he will question why you lied about his personality and development constantly, and that is not going to be a conversation that ends well for you!

 

[Allinfluencedout]

Is it just me or is it on piss?

 

[DCICassieStuart]

NO 1 AUTHOR!!

Or as someone on one of the Hinch Facebook groups once screeched at me: "Do you not know that she's a number one ARTHUR?!"

 

[Notgonnalie]

Spoiler alert! Rons been snapped smacking soph!

 

[HinchesSousChef]

Seven Ron’s a sleeping
Eight Henry’s eating
Nine Audi’s hiding
Ten sharks a hoovering
Eleven wax melts burning
Twelve Ads undeclared

 

[Poppysmimi]

Is it just my boring children that have never been interested in any of the programmes I used to watch? I've tried showing all 3 of them different stuff and they look at me like I've got 2 heads and walk off So I'm thinking this is quite normal. I remember my Mum showing me Bill and Ben and I looked her her the same!
When I showed my youngest son Bagpuss, his words were... "mummy, you come from olden times"
Little shit

My 6 year old asked me what I wore during the Great Fire Of London.
I’m 39....

 

[Debsy37]

Oh ffs I meant cuddle clock not cuddle cock! Sorry typo lol

 

[Spacemonkey1972]

On the 7th day of Christmas my true love gave to meeeee
Brown parcels from mummazzz and Jamieeeee

 

[Henny Penny]

Ron loved helping ??? well he didn’t did he? She showed him ‘‘Helping’ open a box then she decorated it and then after
inch brought Ron Up the stairs when she’d finished!! stop lying!!

 

[Sloppys]

The train set is bigger than she thought does she not realise she can just take parts of the track out and make it as big or as small as she wants? That just looks too big and too stupid.

 

[CheekyCrackerLover]

I hope people use her post box as a suggestion box!

Please stop screaming Handsomezzzz all the time

Could you stop wheeling out a noisey cleaning Trolley from the garage to the front door just to prove you use.

Ask your fat dog to stop stealing freshly baked pies from my kitchen window.

Please don’t park your Audi that you don’t own in inconsiderate places.

Could you ask that items with their own little drivers to not arrive so often.

TURN THE FUCKING LIGHTS OFF!!!!!

Stop lowering the class of the street.

Please pick up the flip flops you threw out the front door.

 

[Dickydoo123]

That misjudged train track she’s bought to go round the bottom of her tree
“Look at the train RonRoo, it’s going round Mammmaz treeeez hang on be back round in a sec............in a minute...............won’t be long..............nearly here...........hang on it’s coming......bored Ron fucks off to twat the dog