Making friends

[Souffle]

I’m 35, I moved to a new area a few months ago, I work from home so don’t have any local colleagues and I have no kids. I don’t like sports or have any hobbies that I can go to a group for (like knitting or painting etc). I live with my partner but he’s in the same boat as me so it’s not even like I can meet any of his mates wives/girlfriends as he hasn’t got any friends either!

I’m not the sort of person that can just approach people in public as I’m a bit shy/awkward.

How the hell do I make any friends?! I’m so lonely

 

[kimjennie]

I’m not in the same age bracket as you, and I’m also struggling with the same issue. But have you tried bumble? They have a friends version of the app and it’s given me some hope even if I haven’t had much luck so far! it’s pretty low-key and it’s nice to not have the pressure of being face to face with a stranger

 

[Hurrah54]

Hey, although you say you don't have any specific hobbies, it might be worth having a look at volunteering opportunities near you.
I'm shy too and moved about a bit but i found it helpful to volunteer some evenings a week somewhere because you meet people that way and you have that as your common ground, then build friendships from there if you'd like.

It is really difficult and tiring and can make you feel more lonely sometimes when you start meeting people and don't click. There's no easy way but you do just have to step out of your comfort zone. It could be a good opportunity to maybe think about a new hobby or skill you might want to try.
I know that's all a cliché sorry! but I can relate.

 

[margaretta]

Find the local facebook groups for your area and see what activities are going on and notice who is posting. You could then message them directly and arrange to meet them there.

Alternatively (and obviously there are risks attached with this) post in the groups that you’ve moved to the area and are looking to make new friends. I’m sure you’ll get coffee invites etc or told about other things that are going on.

Or you could post and ask if there are any social groups.

This is one of the upsides of Facebook; i see this happen a lot in the local groups I am in.

 

[Gloria Rostron]

Hire your local community hall or function room and throw a party. Invite people through Facebook. The conversation always flows more easily over some drinks.

 

[chichi100]

I’m 35, I moved to a new area a few months ago, I work from home so don’t have any local colleagues and I have no kids. I don’t like sports or have any hobbies that I can go to a group for (like knitting or painting etc). I live with my partner but he’s in the same boat as me so it’s not even like I can meet any of his mates wives/girlfriends as he hasn’t got any friends either!

I’m not the sort of person that can just approach people in public as I’m a bit shy/awkward.

How the hell do I make any friends?! I’m so lonely

This sounds exactly like me! Wish i could offer some advice but I’m in the same situation

 

[nik1231]

I’m 35, I moved to a new area a few months ago, I work from home so don’t have any local colleagues and I have no kids. I don’t like sports or have any hobbies that I can go to a group for (like knitting or painting etc). I live with my partner but he’s in the same boat as me so it’s not even like I can meet any of his mates wives/girlfriends as he hasn’t got any friends either!

I’m not the sort of person that can just approach people in public as I’m a bit shy/awkward.

How the hell do I make any friends?! I’m so lonely

I am in exactly the same situation! I moved to a new area about a week ago and putting myself out there is so daunting to me. It’s really tough!

 

[Whatamadworld]

Local Amateur dramatics is always good for meeting people. Honestly, just local groups that you can either attend for free or for a small fee are ideal. Church groups if you're religious.

 

[Zulkraa]

Have you looked at Meet Ups? It’s good for meeting like minded people that enjoy doing the same activities as yourself. Have a look:

Meetup | Find Local Groups, Events, and Activities Near You

Find Meetup events, join groups, or start your own. Make new friends and connect with like-minded people. Meet people near you who share your interests.

www.meetup.com

 

[emm]

I am in the same position, same age as the OP, no children, although it is not because I have moved. I have met people through work at various times etc, but for some reason the friendships never seem to last, they all have their own friendship groups etc. I have been to some things like meetup etc but I actually find it awkward sometimes because when you meet new people and they ask about friends etc I am always embarassed that I basically have none

 

[Some People!]

I actually find it awkward sometimes because when you meet new people and they ask about friends etc I am always embarassed that I basically have none

I'd fib and allude to something like ~a change in circumstances~ leading to you seeking opportunities to socialise if anyone asked. Tempting to say 'new to the area', but then you'd have to fib yourself a whole backstory. Mysterious ~circumstances~ doesn't invite further questions from anyone worth knowing.

I hope you keep trying!

 

[emm]

I'd fib and allude to something like ~a change in circumstances~ leading to you seeking opportunities to socialise if anyone asked. Tempting to say 'new to the area', but then you'd have to fib yourself a whole backstory. Mysterious ~circumstances~ doesn't invite further questions from anyone worth knowing.

I hope you keep trying!

Thank you, I will. I live in the area I was born so changing this would be a bit of a stretch

Either way it is comforting to know I am not alone in this

 

[Some People!]

it is comforting to know I am not alone in this

You're not