Lorna Luxe #12

[Suxy_]

Alright- that’s us furious that this woman just REFUSES to wear a mask. You’re in the hotel lobby, with other people, and out on the street - WEAR A GD MASK. We don’t understand why this is so difficult for her baby brain to understand? We’ve taken it to the next level and reported her to a few authorities - our angle is “she has influence, she’s clearly out in public, she is sending the WRONG message to anyone following her.” We’ve sent screen shots and followed up with a few phone calls too. We’ve already called the hotel to alert them as well. Since they gifted her this stay, they’re also responsible for ensuring the safety of their other guests EVEN IF LL can’t be bothered to comply with basic safety mandates. We’ll keep you posted!

Oh and positive response from the ASA thus far on the issue with her promoting her ITS crap. They agree with us that IF she is wearing the clothes, discussing launch dates, or providing swipe-ups to the clothing, then YES it should be labeled as an Ad because she personally profits from it, regardless of the commercial arrangement with ITS. Better get ahead of this LL and start tagging them as ADs! (But we’ve pushed that she should have to pay a significant fine as well, as in at least 10k)

 

[Its_Me]

Lorna looks a fucking state her feet are literally filthy and her hair is a complete riot. I wasn’t quite close enough to pick up any of the conversion even though Bonnie was talking LOUD! I’ve had to go because I need to be somewhere but they’re still there having desserts and just got another bottle of wine. They’ve also got massive FS and Bulgari bags with freebies in I guess. Half hour of my life I won’t get back but I can positively confirm she DOES NOT look anything like her edited photos.

Was hoping I might catch them leaving so I could see it standing.

 

[Its_Me]

OK this is what I’ve got, I wanted it to be on the first page so we remember where it is for next time and whatever I’ve missed can be added. Sorry for my imperfect grammar but I’ve never claimed to have an English degree Happy for errors to be edited next time

For The Newcomers (Welcome)
Lorna
-Lies constantly, pretty much anything she says is questionable
-Edits her photos within an inch of their life to make herself appear thinner
-Uses filters on her story videos. Tattlers spotted background warping and she was called out for it by CelebFace. Never addressed by Lorna and continues to use filters
-Doesn’t upload stories in real time
-Whenever her follower count is dwindling does a giveaway or buys followers
-Favourite beauty/make up products are whatever brands are paying her at the time
-Constantly pushing her flammable & unsustainable clothing collection with In The Style and responds to any complaints regarding quality, delivery and refunds via Twitter with passive aggressiveness
-Blocks anyone who questions her (blocked individuals are referred to as A-Blocked on tattle)
-Hardly ever declares gifts or ads. Reported many times to ASA. Seems to have stepped up her game since being called out by @Suxy who also created an Instagram page dedicated to her lies and abominable photo editing
-Says she hasn’t had any face fillers for over 2 years but puncture holes on the lips have recently been spied
-Pretends to be empathetic towards current affairs and world disasters when it suits her but has shown little regard for the covid pandemic because it’s just an inconvenience that she would prefer to ignore
-Poor Boo the dog is often carted off to god knows where while they go on trips presumably paid for by In The Style.
-Claims she has an English Literature degree from a Newcastle university which is highly questionable
-Eats at a handful of restaurants in London, suspected she backhands Cecconis for use of their toilets as a changing room when she ‘shoots’ on Bond Street

John aka Mr Luxe
Also referred to on Tattle as
OAP-Old Age Pensioner
OM-Old Mahogany (due to the depth of his tan)
OMR- Old Mahogany Raisin
The Raisin
Creosote King
Elton John

His position within HSBC is questionable due to them openly flaunting their lifestyle on social media and the amount of time he actually spends (or doesn’t spend) working.

She cheated on John and had an ongoing relationship around 2017/2018. Duration AND gender unknown at this stage as it’s thought she may have had a bisexual affair. Tea has been shared via former friends who say she was away with her fancy man/lady the night before Mr Luxe had arranged and called off a birthday brunch for his princess after she failed to appear. It was after this that the Luxe’s seemingly perfect marriage started showing up on Instagram along with a lot more Chanel and Cartier.

The Manor House
Well there is no Manor House
Horsham Heights (HH) is a 2 bed flat situated within lush grounds in Horsham shared by a number of other flats.

She claims herself and John bought the property together shortly after they met but it’s been proven there were no flats sold around this time so most likely owned by John himself and he moved her in.

Fellow tattler @Jasmine is Johns ex wife who has confirmed much of the above.

 

[Suxy_]

Really lorna. REALLY????
That's some relocation..howzabout spending Xmas with your mum and dog.
Rough looking bitch.

We reported her to Met Police AGAIN, attached photos from her own account, and followed up with a call to our contact there with the form submission number. She’s been all over London without a mask - we’re suggesting a fine for “public endangerment” given the size of her following. We just got confirmation they are “actively investigating”.

Maybe we’ll go ahead and alert the Parisienne authorities now... Lorna likely doesn’t speak French, but one of us does!!

 

[Suxy_]

I think we have our next mission! We’ll get in touch with Dior PR and send a note over - with all the coverage on dropping filters lately (interviews on BBC, news articles, possible regulation!) they can’t be thrilled to have gifted some of their precious product to a filter-loving loon. We’re on it!

 

[miss trixie]

You guys are scaring me I think I retire.

Don't lose your nerve @Its_Me - hold steady girl. Your Tattle Team needs you! Maybe on your next covert mission (should you choose to accept it) you could don a disguise, to make sure that you stay low-key. I'm thinking of maybe a wig, pair of sunnies, perhaps a hat (wouldn't have to be straw & Gucci), oops and don't forget yer mask! We could also have a Tattle Insurgents Team (known as "The Tits" for short) on hand to come to your aid at a moment's notice, upon you using an agree codeword, for example "Ablute Ablute". Just remember Agent @Its_Me you are not alone!

 

[Its_Me]

I’ve just been looking back at her instagram pre last year she’s a different person and I wouldn’t ever match that to the girl I saw yesterday. I think it’s the booze you know. She’s put on weight which is fine and pretty normal once you hit mid 30’s but she looks bloated now not healthy fat and what is giving her a moon face. Her eyes look small and dull they were not like that before. And the hair well where to start, it’s thinning and breaking off which again I think is a lot to do with what’s going in her body combined with all the heat but not actually styling it nicely it just looks like a frazzled mop of messy thin hair that she’s constantly flipping around with her hands. The tan has always been too much but seems worse she really needs to not do it for a couple of weeks and scrub it all off properly. Finally the clothing, she hasn’t worn anything nice in a very long time, she needs to drop in the style and drop trying to be eccentric with these weird outfits; the drapes, the big Victorian collars, Florence nightingale dresses, Cruella coats, it doesn’t suit her she looks stupid. “Wear the clothes, don't let the clothes wear you” is so appropriate here nothing fits or suits her properly.

 

[PT32]

I am crying Samantha, you’re a-blocked

 

[Hereforthepictures]

Previously, on keeping up with the luxes...

Lorna is now three holidays deep since July despite there being a global pandemic. She hasn’t paid for a single one herself and on all of them she doesn’t move from the hotel which is quite remarkable. In Greece we had the unveiling of tens of thousands of pounds worth of boastful gifts including a vintage Rolex that she’s peddling as brand new. Not forgetting the £3,600 Chanel jumper and £1,000 Chanel clomper trainers she bought on the way to Venice.

She’s attracted the attention of a couple of lawyers who appear to have created an Instagram account which highlights all of her misdemeanours, but be careful as she will go a-blocking anyone who dares follow it.
To this end she’s now mentioning the odd “ad” or “gifted” but not really anywhere near what she should.

She’s currently obsessed with a website called Sonder that lets you book overpriced nouveau riche apartments in London with awful decor. We know the first stay was gifted and she flapped it at the end of the stay and declared it an ad because she’d been given one night’s free stay. Yeah right. At the moment she’s back in London in an equally bland apartment which is being paid for by everyone’s favourite idiot, Frisby at In the Shite. Of course she’s only ever eating out at Cecconis but will happily order in every night from London’s nicest restaurants for the novelty. Of course, why wouldn’t you want to eat it out of bio degradable packing for the same price rather than pay the same for the full service

We expect to see some more more Splurging while she’s in London, despite the fact that one human couldn’t possibly need any more stuff while their two bed room flat in the back end of fucking nowhere hasn’t even got radiators in most of the rooms.

Last episode:

She is still pretending there’s work going on at her house and we’re all baffled by the lies being told about this, but it means she’s continuing her weird stays in London at the expense of god knows who - it’s definitely not her, she wouldn’t pay for anything if she didn’t have to.

Lorna’s car got broken into in an NCP on the SAME DATE as it did 2 years ago and she expects us to believe this rally happened and she’s not merely fishing for a new car because hers is old. She’s put a lot of emphasis on this.

She’s still catfishing with the filters as ever.

OMG I pressed the wrong button and the title deleted!

 

[Suxy_]

It’s all over now for Luxey luxey

We are so here for this. In fact, I think we’ll put together a packet to help his cause! Who doesn’t love a little pro bono help?? We’ve gathered so much data over the past 4 months, we’re going to reach out to his office to see if his team would like some support in this from an evidentiary position! Hurray!

 

[Tabitha]

I’ve just been lying here thinking about how she just drops life-changing amounts of money (by a lot of people’s standards when you consider average debts in the uk) on a couple of tragic handbags and coats on a frequent basis... all in the name of content. So gross.

Also like... spends weeks in apartments that cost Per night what lots of people Spend on their rent in a month. For what?

Also factor in that she has no where to wear these clothes/ no reason to own them.
She has no job, no social life. She literally buys these clothes and handbags to play dress up in and take photos.

 

[Suxy_]

Pretty sure your face should be in a Mask inside the store LL... hmmm, we know quite a few authorities in this space, think we’ll give a call tmr to see what the protocol is, and what kind of wrist slap we can send over! (We just love a good fine!)

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

@Its_Me promoted with immediate effect

to

Field Agent MANAGING DIRECTOR

As well as ....

an..


Honorary Investigative Research Doctorate from the University of Horsham, for long standing commitment & services to Tattle and it’s Sisterhood of Field Agents.

A box of Whispering Angel and a Banana Highlighter are on their way to you.

Stay in touch!

 

[Hamilton1970]

Is Bonnie bint kidding with the proportions of this photo?!
Is she sponsored by a medieval stretching torture rack !!??

 

[pink_norris]

Found this, make sure the sound is on

Lorna London

 

[Fluffy81]

Morning. Campers.

 

[Ohmydays]

Who’s doing the new thread .. and page 1catch up ?

She’s only gone and a - blocked my Fukkin mother !. She’s furious imagine Katherine Tates nan character . My Mum said she was only being nice .. My day started bad but Fukkin hell we’ve had to have a family zoom session

 

[KikoM]

What other words do we call John besides OM and OAP my minds drawn a blank there

Creosote King

The Raisin

OMR (old mahogany raisin)

Elton John

There’s probably more

 

[Its_Me]

Bonnie Bint Pin head

Grab yourself some bargains lots to be had In The Shite LL

I’d be surprised if they carry on with her she’s not selling well, loads of stock left and ITS are all about money they won’t waste time if they don’t get sales

Personally I’m considering this gem early treat for me

That’s a joke is it? £30 to £5 and it only ‘launched’ last month! I wish In The Style would fall off the face of the earth they make me sick.

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

“Indefinitely”. ( or indefinitely because they can’t get a specific date with covid lockdown threats imminent)
Okay so they’re there to shoot the collection and then they will just somehow end up back in England like they were before.. where the Paris flat was simply never mentioned again.

Don’t forget she wants / needs to be perceived as rich, famous & successful enough to just pick up and move to Paris. She has to keep up this narrative. I suspect the truth is much more basic, because if they were permanently ( indefinitely) moving to Paris.. she would have been bragging about it, she’s a narc, she couldn’t help herself and this has only happened since the talk of theOctober SHITdrop.

This is all about whipping up some curiosity..keeping people guessing. We know she’s not viewed any flats or houses in Paris as she’s been in London for the duration since back from Santorini! So it will be a similar set up to the London flat rental.
If the dog is there we will know if it’s a “permanent” thing..but... I suspect she will evade questions about the dog also...

Remember she is FULL to the brim of shit