Learning to drive.

[Doyoureally?]

me too.
So, I am sat on my bed, on my own in floods of tears because in 3 hours my instructor is coming for me and in five hours I’ll have failed. I honestly don’t think I can remember a thing that I’m supposed to do. I’m fucking furious with myself.

Thinking of you and sending lots of positive vibes your way!

 

[LaurieLaurie]

Is anyone else worried the restrictions will come back and cancel our tests?

 

[Thank(space)you]

How's everybody getting on? Another lesson tomorrow fed up so posting here for my weekly moan

 

[Lollypad]

Gears and clutch are one in one though. I didn't realise you guys were specifically talking about confusion relating to gears vs. speed etc. Change my original comment from "gears" to "manual" lol. Either way, an automatic *is* easier. There's absolutely no denying that. I have zero intention of ever driving one and I personally think you forgo an element of control for the sake of ease, but it is still easier, especially for new drivers. I do think it makes a lot more sense to learn in a manual and then drive an auto knowing you can do both but a lot of people simply wouldn't drive if that were their only option.

I had 0 lessons which is why I highly recommend YouTube videos, basically free driving lessons. Watch the YouTube, practice it under your own supervision, repeat. It's comforting watching other learners get flustered by the same things you are too. I sat in on 2 of my partner's lessons and I think the instructor was a bit full-on. All my friends telling me stories of the instructor grabbing the wheel or preventing them from stalling by dipping the clutch, or the worst - instructors encouraging people to move off using only the clutch?! 2 people I know still stall a year after passing because they think you don't need to put revs in. I didn't progress to roads until I felt comfortable (started in an empty Tesco car park and thought I'd crash going 5mph LOL) but I think knowing I only had myself to rely on, not dual controls, made me learn quicker tbh.

Honestly I remember being terrified driving at 5 miles an hour, seeing pedestrians 200m away thinking I was going to kill them!

 

[hogwartsgraduate]

I have my first driving lesson in over 2 years on Monday morning. I had about 10 hours a couple of years ago and gave up as it was another stressor at a time when I was struggling with my MH. I've been on a wait list for ages and now I'm finally able to pick back up I feel so nervous! Not sure how to alleviate nerves but I'm glad I've got a morning slot as at least then it's over and done with for the day rather than me sitting around all day worrying about the lesson

I also need to rebook my theory as that ran out a few months ago.

Good luck you got this!! I used a few theory apps and they worked well

I had another lesson after I said I would change instructor and damn I shouldn't have done it ... She quizzed me on my anxiety symptoms and cross examined them making me feel like I was lying/nothing wrong with me basically

This week I cancelled it, so now just looking for someone else. I have a test booked for Oct 22nd but I'll just delay if needs be - I need to remove the pressure on myself to help with the anxiety I think, slow it down....

 

[Mascaragirl]

After 4 years I’ve decided I want to start lessons again and do my test. I was learning and took my test in 2017 but failed and never picked it back up after being so traumatized I was really good on the driving part but on my test the examiner was nasty. For example, I indicated to go left but meant to indicate right and she goes, “WHY are you doing that?”. It was the nerves, I also ended up stalling at a box junction and she was shouting at me to “hurry up”, “come on MOVE” and I couldn’t stop stalling. She was a horrible cow and it scarred me for life I’m thinking about learning automatic because the gears/pedals stress me out and my brain feels like it can’t do everything at once so think this would be the best option. How do I find the courage to just book lessons/my test?

This is me, I started years ago when I was able to and left every lesson crying, with no confidence. I stopped the lessons. Now I feel ready to start again, I’m not sure how to do it, has anyone had any experience of intense courses? Also any tips on how to actually not be terrified because I’m constantly worried about doing something wrong, and the instructor shouting at me like my last one which just makes me panic 🥲

 

[kittypaws]

Ugh, I'm so fed up of having lessons now. I spend all Monday resenting the fact I've got a lesson the next day

Would you like to chat? I’ve been where you are and have come such a long way. Can’t PM here but could give you my social media x

 

[Hope96]

Nearly cancelled my lesson for Thursday but talked myself out of it. I need to do this for myself!

 

[Savannah_xx]

Haha, finding one (DI) these past two weeks has been a pisstake. They all saying they're booked up, ffs. I just want to start.

 

[Belulah]

Well that's my test cancelled! I hope you lot aren't too affected!

I’m so sorry to hear that. My lessons have been cancelled, nowhere near as bad as losing a test.
please let them extend theory certs this time!

 

[LaurieLaurie]

I’ve been looking at practical tests tonight and there’s absolutely nothing! That’s worrying. I’m going to keep checking and just pray I get in!

I’m checking 10 times a day but I saw on the dvsa social media page that they release new dates throughout the day on Monday.

 

[hrh89]

No please don’t let it make you feel like an idiot, it’s really so unimportant and I don’t think anyone even thinks about whether someone drives a manual or automatic, I can’t think off the top of my head what most of my friends and family drive. I learnt manual and drove one for 10 years but when I upgraded my car I switched to automatic and honestly I’d never go back, it’s a dream! There are cars that you can now only buy an automatic version and I think going forward with electric cars manual will become a thing of the past. I wouldn’t waste the time or money pushing yourself to learn manual when there’s an alternative. Have you tried an automatic? If not give it a go and see what you think

never tried an automatic no! I only had about 8 lessons in a manual so I clearly didn’t give myself enough time but even those few lessons I could sense it was a bit too much to juggle at once. My instructor was an arse too and made me feel like shit so that didn’t help

 

[Thank(space)you]

So far...
1 x 1 hrs
3 x 1.5 hours

I just don't like to not get things first time which is a bit silly especially when learning to drive but it's getting me down if I'm honest.

You've only just started out, give yourself time. I feel your frustration though as I am very much the same!

Spoiler: Pity party

Feeling so rubbish about driving tomorrow. What's the point? I've been having lessons for 2 years and i still am not rest ready. Just feeling like I'm wasting my time and my money.
I was finally getting to a place where I wasn't hating my lessons and I was believing in myself and that I can drive and now it's like all the wind has been knocked out from my sails.

I have messaged my driving instructor asking if we can have a chat tomorrow.

 

[LaurieLaurie]

So my next test date was December, been trying like mad to get a cancellation but they get snapped up in seconds! Everytime I get a notification on the app it's already gone even though I click straight away. Then this morning they've been releasing loads!!!! My app is going mad, got a new date for October, then 5 mins later an August date came up so changed it again! I have 6 weeks to prepare now, thank God I've got one so much sooner!

I use the Testi app but they don’t always send notifications even though I paid for premium. 9 out of 10 times I check the app and there’s tests on there… no notifications!

 

[Thank(space)you]

You can absolutely do it! I used to be nearly in tears before lessons and really found rescue remedy helped, does your instructor know how you feel?

good luck

Yes, he's brilliant. I take rescue remedy, do hypnosis and eat a banana before every lesson to try and help

 

[Belulah]

First lesson since December this afternoon explained to my instructor that I need a couple of hours of back to basics to start with just to get my confidence back up so hopefully not too much to worry about

Hope it goes well!

 

[Lollypad]

I’m so sorry to hear that. My lessons have been cancelled, nowhere near as bad as losing a test.
please let them extend theory certs this time!

I really hope they extend the theories - but I only re-passed mine in Sept so that wouldn't massively affect me.
Thank you! It's just one of those things though, unfortunate but I can't do anything about it, so no point stressing about it!

 

[Belulah]

Can I ask what the GP said to you? Was it your first time of speaking to them about anxiety? I really can’t go through this again next time.
Thank you everyone. I’m so very very disappointed but iv just got booked back in again for the 19th of November. So hopefully lucky number 3

I said my driving instructor had said I was a safe driver but my anxiety was getting the better of me. She spoke to me about nerves in other aspect of my life and about my current anxiety medication and then agreed to give me three tablets. One to make sure there was no adverse effects, one to take before a lesson to make sure it did not effect my driving and one for the test.

 

[under the ivy]

That’s brilliant!!! I wonder what happened in your head to stop being anxious? I’m not an anxious person in every day life. Nothing much phases me but put me in a car and it’s a different story. Everything is a potential killer, 20mph feels like I’m flying a bloody plane...I feel like I’m in some terrible game with threats everywhere trying to kill me. I wonder if it’s because I’m learning in London? I’m fine on a bike though!

Something just twigged in my head and I just thought f**k it! Luckily I have a good instructor which makes or breaks learning. I’m learning in Leeds, not as busy as London but lots of cars on the road!

 

[elloelloello]

So I did a mock test today, 3 serious faults and 4 minors, I’ve completely lost my confidence now but I have x2 more 2 hour lessons booked before my test in less than two weeks so here’s hoping for a miracle