Learning to drive.

[nightfeedz]

Thank you both. Usually I would tell anyone to stfu but for some reason I couldn’t say it, I was making loads of stupid mistakes with my gears and speed. I’ll be dropping him if I fail.

That’s so shitty, I’m sorry you have to be in that situation.

It’s easy to accept being in a car with an instructor as normal but it is actually quite a vulnerable position to be in and it needs to be a supportive safe space for you as a student. It’s hard to call people out on inappropriate behaviour in that setting so i hope you aren’t feeling bad about that aspect.

I hope you will pass your test and if you don’t it won’t be hard to find someone better to help you.

I’m not actively doing lessons at the moment but I think I will look for a new instructor as my last one said some things that made me very uncomfortable and like you it led to me making silly mistakes and feeling less in control.

The things this man said weren’t sexual but very weird and made me uncomfortable- jokes about disability and my children dying ?!?!

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

My instructor is annoyed I'm self isolating as my child has covid-19 symptoms. He's saying how do I expect to pass my test if I'm cancelling lessons

I would seriously get rid. I remember my first driving instructor, I text him to say I needed to cancel as my mum had gone missing and he replied saying “well I’m outside your house”. So I said “well I’m not home, I’m out looking for my mum” and he just replied “I think we should take a break from lessons for a while”. (I couldn’t give him advanced notice as I literally had a call 20 mins before my lesson to say she was missing). I never heard from him again.

 

[Belulah]

got my first lesson next month.. any tips? i am a very anxious person.

Remember it is a long slog- don’t expect it to all make sense straight away- and regressions are normal.

 

[LadyB65]

I passed my test yesterday!!!! Still can’t quite believe it, I was convinced I was going to fail! Everything just went my way and I only got 2 minors!

A year ago I was an absolute mess when it came to driving. I hated my lessons, felt sick the day and morning before and would even cancel them cos my anxiety was so bad. I’ve been learning on and off for 10 years and had so many barriers it’s been unreal. It’s been such a long journey but I never gave up. I was close at times but I was determined and I have FINALLY done it! To anyone reading this who is feeling like I used to, please take it from me that you CAN do it. I never thought I would and today I’ve driven to Asda by myself and filled my car up with diesel. This is just the very start of the rest of my life

The biggest congratulations to you lovely!!! It’s life changing so so happy for you!

 

[Dramabyname]

This is me, I started years ago when I was able to and left every lesson crying, with no confidence. I stopped the lessons. Now I feel ready to start again, I’m not sure how to do it, has anyone had any experience of intense courses? Also any tips on how to actually not be terrified because I’m constantly worried about doing something wrong, and the instructor shouting at me like my last one which just makes me panic 🥲

I don’t have any personal experience of intense courses but my other half did it in 2 weeks and he loved it. He was absolutely knackered at the end of everyday he was driving as it was so much information but he’s glad he did it. He booked 2 weeks off work and went out driving with his instructor and then in his spare time he read books and watched YouTube videos. He was lucky that he could go out with his Dad as well so had lots of extra practise. He passed first time with no minors.

 

[Doyoureally?]

No problem! I used theory test success. The videos were different unfortunately but very similar! They are like sims type virtual reality videos in the actual test so it’s actually clearer than the ones they use where it’s a camera mounted on a car. X

To correct myself I use Driving theory test 4 in 1 kit. It’s still £4.99.The logo on the app says driving test success. They also have a practical test element that also cost £4.99 it go through manoeuvres, questions and clips to teach various aspects. I’m going to purchase it also as I really rate the theory element they have.

 

[LaurieLaurie]

I genuinely just don't know when to steer or when I do it's too late according to my driving instructor. He also takes over a lot so I don't have time to think but he said I need to think quicker. :/ I was driving in the middle of the road a few times last week and about to go into a parked car at one point because I genuinely just can't tell when to steer so I understand where he is coming from. I didn't realise how often you have to steer either and that it is small, gentle steers the majority of the time. I must come across as so stupid!

Ask him to talk you through when to steer and turn etc. It took me months for the penny to drop over steering when I reverse park but it dropped in the end.

 

[bolimepipi]

It took me years to learn to drive - no lockdowns, just lots of stopping and starting over a period of years. Try not to let that derail you; you won’t have forgotten anything so just get out there and allow yourself to enjoy the drive

sorry jumping in randomly but this actually made me feel better! i got my licence 5 years ago and i'm still terrified of driving

 

[under the ivy]

I'm having my first ever driving lesson on Thursday and I'm already talking myself out of it. I think I really need to do this for my own independence and just to show myself I can do it. I have bad anxiety around driving and I've been putting it off since I was in sixth form. I just don't know a lot about cars, driving and the roads which makes it so much worse for me!

I’ve been learning on and off since my early 20s and it’s only since I’ve been doing lessons post-lockdown that my confidence driving / on the road has grown. It is a great life skill to have in my opinion and gives you so much freedom - try and channel that into your lessons. It is anxiety inducing but maybe talk to your instructor about your worries? X

 

[judsmum]

Funny two people have told me this happened to them where they made a mistake and thought “well fuck it I’ve failed” might aswell keep going and they passed cause they stopped worrying Also my dad has been accompanying me and he is so negative all the time telling me everything wrong and never right it drains me and makes me believe I’m shit so I’m hoping the instructor will be nice as my nerves are shot thinking about my test tomorrow

How did you get on?

 

[Gembo]

Dreading my lesson tomorrow, my confidence has definitely gone

Hey don’t be hard on yourself, I‘ve been driving for 16 years now and I still lose my confidence, especially having not driven for so much of lockdown. You are learning something new and it’s a big thing to learn, you wouldn’t give anyone else a hard time for it. Take it at your own pace, it took me I think 4 attempts to pass as my nerves would just completely overwhelm me and I’d physically shake. You will get there I promise just don’t give up x

 

[under the ivy]

I had my first manual driving lesson last week and although the actual driving part went well my instructor was terrible. He would use his phone and blast it on speaker which would distract me so much. He asked me personal questions about my relationship and if I loved my partner. He done a whole lot of talking about everything except driving. Didn't go through the Cockpit drill properly. Didn't teach me nothing about mirrors. Threw me straight on the road and kept kissing his teeth when I made a mistake despite me telling him I'm nervous and it's my first time. What really had me questioning his professionalism is when he asked me if I could drive back home! Honestly that session was enough to put me off but I've booked another instructor for 2 weeks time and also in an automatic car this time. Hopefully I'll have a better experience. Good luck to you all doing your theories and/or practical test x

It’s so disheartening when you get a dodgy instructor. Your instructors sounds like my old one (asking questions about my relationship status, saying I’m attractive, taking the wheel as soon as I’ve moved off). I’m doing automatic now with a female instructor and it’s a lot easier. Best of luck x

 

[under the ivy]

How are we all doing with our learning? I have my first lesson in 3 weeks today - really anxious that I’m going to forget everything I’ve learnt. I have my theory test next Friday as well. Hope everyone is ok x

 

[LaurieLaurie]

My minors were because of nerves I think. I think the vehicle check was the show me question.

 

[kittypaws]

Thanks both! I will try and remember to just ignore what's going on behind me and focus on approaching the junction and keep calm. My lesson is in 10 minutes so I will report back!

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Looking for a car is such a bloody pain
My test is in 8 weeks, I'm on holiday next week so will have 7 lessons before then.
Only thing my instructor says I need to work on is my confidence.
I'm gonna drive my sisters car on holiday in an unfamiliar city so I'm hoping that will give me a boost

7 lessons is loads of time. 7 hours of driving.

stop over thinking it. You can already drive. You are ready for your test. All you can do is take the test and hope for the best. If you pass then it’s awesome but if you don’t pass you at least know what the test is really like which is beneficial

 

[BettyCrockerr]

My test is in six weeks. Do you have another booked?

I feel confident at driving but I’m worried I’m going to fail because of other drivers driving like this. We can react all we want but it’s still classed as a dangerous fault I was talking to my friend about it last night and he said people do this to him every single day on his way home from work.

A proportion of the test and wether you pass or fail is unfortunately down to luck of the draw on the day. All you can do, is take the test and hope for the best - you can’t control what others are doing on the road and sometimes as unfair as it is, other people’s poor driving or bad decisions does have a negative impact on you. Try not to let this put you off - just go for the test and give it a shot.

 

[under the ivy]

I'm a lot more confident on the road in my automatic lessons - I think it's a combination of automatic and my instructor.

I've written before on this thread about my last instructor. It makes the world of difference.

 

[Hope96]

I've been meaning to reply back to some of the lovely replies for a few days now but keep forgetting to do so but thank you everyone. I will respond properly later on today. x

I have a lesson at 10:30 and I just really am considering cancelling. I really don't want to have my lesson today and I feel really negative about it all after last weekend. I have zero confidence or faith in myself right now.

 

[jawidjanqndn]

Guys I have my first lesson in 7 mins I want to throw up