Lauren Goodger #109 Like a pleather galleon in full sail

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I always used to think that it was her calling the paps to take these pictures so she could them disappear for a few months and pop back up half the size and day OMG I was papped in the wild and it gave me a shock.. here I am
Now 16 stone lighter
Buy my diet plan etc

But it can’t be
It has been a fee years now of these real pics of her looking like a huge bouncy castle so hod only knows why she does it!
Am still convinced she calls them herself
 
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She is not right in the head. I think she really does believe she looks like the filtered version of herself hence she goes out looking like that. She must be hell to live with.
 
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I always used to think that it was her calling the paps to take these pictures so she could them disappear for a few months and pop back up half the size and day OMG I was papped in the wild and it gave me a shock.. here I am
Now 16 stone lighter
Buy my diet plan etc

But it can’t be
It has been a fee years now of these real pics of her looking like a huge bouncy castle so hod only knows why she does it!
Am still convinced she calls them herself
I think she’s delusional. I reckon she thinks she looks the mutt’s nuts, gets the paps round to show everyone how hot she is even when she is doing mundane errands, sees the pics, people herself over how bad they’ve made her look, waits a while and then rings them up again to prove she looks much better than the last set of pics, plan backfires cos she doesn’t. And the cycle continues.
 
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Right Scrunchies: taking bets.

Next 'interview or podcast' she will rehash
1. I need my ginormous boobs and a implants (that I denied having for years) removing as a buzy, singul muvva wiv no help whatsoeva I can't afford to pay for myself. And it causes serve anixety,
2. LaHayfever rushed to hospicle with life threatening sneezing in middul of the night. By ambulancce licherally.
3. By popular demand I've restarted my oily flaps accunt. now only 3p a subscripshun. Bum holey pics now available for 87p.
4. Been badly let down for LaHayfever's birfday next munf. Need bounsy castul, huge cake, 7 million balons. Free catering. Free venue suitable for aduolts.
5. Doing Jim 8 times a week now and guna do youtoobe fideos.
6. Wanna lose 14 stone before I turn forety in julytember.
7. Soon will be Free years since LaAngel died, -doing a charity marafun in her memory

BUT I'M BETTING ON THIS
8. 567386 PHOTOSHOPPED PICS OF HER AS A SIZE 8.
Are you Lozz' sock account?!
 
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I see Chaz is doing the international call of the grifter with a’does anyone know someone who can…’.
I wonder if he has ever thought of Google to find what he needs, plus I thought he was in the nutrition game (snort) so it’s a pretty small world all the sports massage, nutrition etc… absolute melt
 
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Right Scrunchies: taking bets.

Next 'interview or podcast' she will rehash
1. I need my ginormous boobs and a implants (that I denied having for years) removing as a buzy, singul muvva wiv no help whatsoeva I can't afford to pay for myself. And it causes serve anixety,
2. LaHayfever rushed to hospicle with life threatening sneezing in middul of the night. By ambulancce licherally.
3. By popular demand I've restarted my oily flaps accunt. now only 3p a subscripshun. Bum holey pics now available for 87p.
4. Been badly let down for LaHayfever's birfday next munf. Need bounsy castul, huge cake, 7 million balons. Free catering. Free venue suitable for aduolts.
5. Doing Jim 8 times a week now and guna do youtoobe fideos.
6. Wanna lose 14 stone before I turn forety in julytember.
7. Soon will be Free years since LaAngel died, -doing a charity marafun in her memory

BUT I'M BETTING ON THIS
8. 567386 PHOTOSHOPPED PICS OF HER AS A SIZE 8.
EXCLUSIVE for the winner 2 VIP tickets for her book launch. Don't rush everyone!
 
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I’ve been rewatching Towie, she really has always been a vile, nasty and spiteful person. I’ve just seen the bit where Gemma Collins asks her whether she’ll ever stop saying “I was with Mark for 10 years” 😭
 
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