Jane Gammons #49 All those sweeties? Helloooo diabetes!

[ChubClubThug]

To the tune of Dancing Queen

Friday night and my views are low,
Looking for an excuse to go....
I really hate working,
I'd rather be twerking,
But The Bean said no......

Anybody on uber eats?
I got crocs on for me fat feeeeeets
I am bloody starving
Better do some fake laughing,
I'm in the mood for GRUB...

 

[lexiloo]

New thread time, thanks to @doctordoctor for the suggestion with most likes

Can't wait to see what this thread brings.......

Will Bertie finally be rolled out onto the roads so the gammons can entertain us all trying out van life?
Will Jane haul her arse off the sofa long enough to actually have enough stock made so orders can be fulfilled and despatched without waiting a week?
Will Amy ever receive her missing parcel?
Will the musty flat of doom get a deep clean?
Will Jane realise her biznizz is tanking and she's a laughing stock on SM?
Tune in to find out, tattle on folks.........

 

[square_spoon]

#50 Turning 30, still dirty, more girthy, watch out Berty

 

[Motherofpigs]

Jane Gammons #50 berty the van and polly the potty, flat is a dump and she’s still grotty!

on a side note I can’t believe we are up to 50 threads!

 

[Motherofpigs]

So guyzzzzzzz I took one for the team and ordered a Chins halloween bag, because I wanted to see how shit it was. It arrived today. Was keeping it quiet haha. Anyway review as follows:

That ridiculous blood bag thing was burst for starters, all over the box. When I opened it, it was in the bottom of the box, no protection, basically sitting on the cardboard not even any packing peanuts under it. The jelly soap was also a bit burst - as in the seal was broken so now cannot be used as unsanitary. The soap slice looks like it has given up on life and smells like nothing. The snapbars were okay, one of them is quite nice actually so not all bad! Anyway what a rip off for £18.99 also the blood bag still has directions on the back as if you can drink it. Can this be reported to trading standards? Anyway all of the stuff except the snaps will be going in the bin! I’m not going to contact Chins as 1. I wish to remain anon haha and 2. She will deny responsibility and blame royal mail.

enjoy pics below! and yea I made the blood bag one black and white and covered the scent so that she can’t rewatch her live and whittle it down

 

[lexiloo]

I've had one of those mornings where my hair has a mind of it's own, my make up could be better and my outfit seems wrong but one look at those screen shots of Quasimodo and I feel like Cindy Crawford

 

[Firebug]

That type of bag she is using isn't designed for use in the shower, it's a refill big, for filling soup dispensers to save plastic (not this tacky novelty one but the concept). M&S do them in the hand soap my other half swears he likes better than all the cheaper ones I could buy. The cap is tiny and fiddly, when your hands are wet and soapy it's hard to get back on and in the meantime, the soap runs out as there no no-return valve in the bag. By the time you've opened it, tried to shower with it, tried to close it, preventing it from dribbling out, but it drains out onto the shower floor, you skid, you hit your head and it's all over. If you survive the concussion you still have the thrush, blindness and allergic reaction to contend with.

 

[lexiloo]

View attachment 1616712

Do you hear the drums fatnando

 

[Sweatybetty]

 

[Motherofpigs]

Oh my fucking god

 

[square_spoon]

I was tittering at her cronies on the live today - insisting she must go to the emergency dentist even though she said herself it’s discomfort she’s in as opposed to any serious pain. This must be what a group of ‘I kNOw mY riGhTs’ people look and sound like. She was giving out about the price of private dental care lamenting ‘I’m in the wrong bloomin business’ because these dentists must be raking it in. Yes Jane, those dentists, the ones who spent years at university, have years of clinical training, and actually work for a living every day…..how very dare they!

 

[Firebug]

Really does show how tiny this van will be, no head room at all, still the ceiling to go in so it's going to be a hands and knees excistance for them.

 

[Sweatybetty]

Strutting into Eastbourne like …..

 

[Motherofpigs]

I couldn’t whip out a potty infront of my (long-term!) partner in the middle of a fucking transit van and take a dump. Wtf is the matter with them the whole van will be stinking of shite poor Bean will be forced to empty it too.

 

[Ccapf]

Charlie can’t exercise to lose weight because of his back? Well how about eating less then would do his back the world of good it didn’t have to carry such a weight and funny how his back is fine when he is messing about with the van and what’s her excuse for no exercise?

I literally lost 10 stone just by lowering my calories. No working out. They were doing activities in Scotland that would burn calories hahahahaha. She's has lieabetes.

 

[Sweatybetty]

Honest I’ve watched so much the last two days as it’s been so funny but I do feel a bit brain dead


Might have tomorrow off

She’s not even melted the soap massive Chuck fell out

She’s been told to do her own research

 

[doctordoctor]

‘Cosy Sunday’ ‘just us two’ she tries to make them sound such a romantic couple…of course it’s just you two!! YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS YOU COMPLETE DINGBAT!!!

 

[doctordoctor]

Ah yes, Jane and her inspirational life! All cosines, snuggles, hot chocolate… in reality, it’s a freezing flat, morbid obesity, self loathing, rarely leaving her safe place, a depressed, weak husband, a friendless, brainless, mindless, boring, insular life…imagining people are jealous of her ‘success’ her biggest ‘achievement’ was getting married to a blundering idiot, a man who allowed himself to be poisoned against his own mother by his hideous wife, a man to weak to tell her this ridiculous ‘business’ needs to end and she desperately needs to get off her enormous behind and get full time employment! We are both retired, have good work pensions, mortgage paid off etc, we’re looking to make savings at this time! How are they going to manage?? It’s ridiculous she is so entitled to think she can live off daft boy, and he’s ridiculous for allowing it!

 

[lexiloo]

£18.99 but worth over £20 Martin Lewis will be mentioning her with bargains like that!!!

 

[GimmieSauceage]

Can’t wait to see the little birthday reel , tacky cupcakes , a homemade cake that looks like it’s been dropped, view from the car looking onto some fields followed by a Thai takeaway
Is she really having this week off

I bet there won’t be a single photo of her on her birthday unless it’s a car fish close up selfie despite claiming she’s happy being the size she is.

I bet daft boy uses an old 5 stone lighter photo on his insta saying how proud he is how hard she works how beautiful she is and something about a little life oh I even bet he adds in how much she’s accomplished in those 30 years when actually it’s nothing