Jake Quickenden #35 Spudgun’s a brat and Fakes on the white, we’re all off to hell but that’s alright!

[Lucyxxxx]

#36

Is it his brother, is it his dad? No, its just the ghost of the career he never had.

 

[IamMyaJ]

Lads… I have some news…. There’s a baby MJ on the way, went to the doctors because I couldn’t stop throwing up and was gaining weight but I was having periods and couldn’t understand!! I’m about to sit and set up an account for the baby and eye fuck myself for the next 10 years I will make sure I switch between accounts to up my engagement and let my baby be a complete brat oh wait sorry I’m not Jake Ickenden!!! I’m already 22 weeks so massive shock but hey at least my fella didn’t fuck me off and come back because I was pregnant

 

[bluecups]

He's got to give up this ridiculous idea that he's going to be mega famous. Like others have said, WTAF is he on about, saying he's waiting for his big break? I'm a Celeb, X Factor AND DOI. Biggest reality shows on UK telly (apart from Strictly that he'll never get) WERE his big break. He obviously pissed off ITV bigtime because he's clearly on their blacklist. Nodody wants to work with him. Nobody wants to employ him. Nobody wants to hear him sing. Nobody cares about his horrible kid. Nobody wants to hear him play guitar. Nobody is interested in his opinions.

He needs to cut his losses and run before he embarrasses himself any further. He's not a teenager in his mum's box room - he's a grown man with a wife and family to support. A few paid ads for jelly or almonds isn't going to pay the mortgage and the gas bills this winter.

The only way forward I see for him is to abandon all notions of fame and retrain as a personal fitness trainer. It's a subject he is genuinely interested in and enthusiastic about. He'd get paid for going to the gym. There'd be the added novelty that he used to be famous which might be a unique selling point to punters. It would be a stable, regular income. He could keep his Insta and use it for fitness stuff and to muse about the pitfalls of "fame" and tell people what a shallow world it is. Probably get better engagement than he does now tbh.

Kirk Norcross from TOWIE sacked off the fame game and opened his own business cleaning drains. Said he's never been happier.

Get Flappy back in the shed doing aesthetics and they've got two decent incomes.

If he persists in chasing this impossible dream everything will turn to shit, he'll end up even more of a laughing stock and probably bankrupt. He's not particularly stable anyway, I think as this all slips further through his fingers he's going to have a massive meltdown, like bigtime.

Save yourself and your family, Jacob. Hold up your hands and admit the pursuit of fame is completely futile and go retrain as something else before the baliffs come a-knocking. Cunt.

 

[KellyNaylor1988]

Hi, lurker here! I usually skip through Jakes posts, but last night I saw a video which really annoyed me. The one where he was taking the p*ss out of his mums glasses. I messaged him and explained that that really offended me. I am registered blind and rely on my glasses to see. I pointed out that he should be mindful of other peoples situations. He responded to my message saying it was a joke between him and his mum and no one else…. Despite him posting it on his public stories. He then proceeded to block me!! I actually can’t believe it, I pointed out that his story offended me and explained the reasons why, and instead of him saying something like thanks for the feedback, he got defensive and blocked me! I’ve sent him a long message on Twitter reminding him that he spouts off about other peoples mental health and “Be Kind” all the time and asked him how he thinks his actions have made me feel…. Not holding out for a response. What a complete waste of air that so called man is!!!

 

[Glitterbelle]

'He thinks he's mates with Lewis Capaldi, but we all know he should be working in Aldi'

Putting it out there for the next thread title.

 

[instashun]

Lynne works hard and must be coming up to retirement age yet This cunt is in his 30s and cries when he has to work more than a few hours. How can he honestly not look at himself when he’s working with her and not be utterly embarrassed by all his ‘illnesses’ when she gets on with it

Lynne probably actually enjoys her job and getting to travel round where as Jake pretends he does and is grateful yet thinks he’s above it. Good on her she seems great

In jakes head he should be presenting im a celeb not eating dick on it

Can you imagine it. When the older people go on and are exempt

“Jake is exempt from this challenge because of his hip”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge because of his back”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge incase he gets something stuck in his teeth”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge incase his hairline comes off”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge because he’s been awake for 15 minutes and tired”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge because he’s missing his kid he barely spends time with”
“Jake is exempt from this challenge because hes got tonsilitis”

….cut to him myleene klass’ing in the shower just fine

 

[Barbie2020]

34 year old bloke watching Netflix on a Monday afternoon. Tell me you’re unemployed without telling me you’re unemployed.

 

[dandymandy]

Zelda arriving for “filming”

 

[riddleme89]

Yes, I agree that Rob should be kept away from this thread but it was nice to see a pic of him. He looks a nice bloke and rather fit. Flappy really has downgraded big time with that syrup wearing cunt. No wonder Fred is good looking!

So much I could have shared but I didn’t . I never shared his full name or his fiancé’s Instagram page . Or other posts that could have been interesting for us all and a laugh . I respect the privacy I just wanted to share that he is happy at his dads with his step mum . I will not be sharing anything else .

 

[bluecups]

"Mumy's drink?" "Mummy's?" Why are you asking him you fucking idiot? He's a toddler, TELL him it's mummy's drink and take it off him. This kind of behaviour is going to go down a storm at nursery or primary school. He's turning into a horrible little shit and it's not his fault, it's theirs.

 

[PrincessJeanie]

Dear God give me strength. Either somebody hasn't taken their meds this morning or he's written this message to himself and replied!
View attachment 1599390

Surprise surprise the double exclamation mark at the end and ‘they’ve’ put Leo, Fred & Sophie, which is the same order he always uses. Also if someone had genuinely messaged it why does he have to share it. Oh of course for attention

 

[CrazyBaldhead]

Can just imagine him setting up booby traps around the house off his nut!!!

 

[Rob2401]

Does that mentally dense bitch realise you aren’t meant to brush hair wet? How stupid can you be! Poor kids hair is already hanging on by a thread like his dads.
This is all I see when I look at Fake’s hair
View attachment 1610770

LOL yes I know I’m going to hell but still LOL

 

[Lucyxxxx]

I'm giving it 6 months until they are on OF.

'Join us for the wedding footage we couldnt post on insta '

 

[Philimena cunk]

Tagging them to try get noticed and see if they notice him

jake you have no fans mate … nobody has messaged you ya fucking melt


No it’s not “ celeb gogglebox “ Jake your not a celeb for fuck sake . Seriously thinks highly of himself doesn’t he . Your dressing up as cinderella in a shit panto yet again …. No celeb would be doing that you wet wipe

Probably bargain hunt can see them clowns in a red fleece …. Dealers would give him huge discount just to get rid of the manic cunt

Bargain Cunt .

 

[CrazyBaldhead]

Would the real Mr Mean please stand up, please stand up, please stand up!!

 

[bluecups]

"Someone messaged me saying you don't sing enough on your stories anymore"

 

[VC10]

What the fuck???

Has he been at the butter cream?

Imagine that banging on your front door!

 

[riddleme89]

He’s manic as fuck love it

Jake quickenden # Cant get a job it’s sending him manic even the gummies can’t stop this panic

 

[IamMyaJ]

Oh my god please let this person come here but then they obviously have no idea who it is