Jack Monroe #420 You're not an economist. You're a smart price fantasist.

[Geetbo]

Because it’s definitely the job of your 12 year old child to pull you out of depression.

 

[Geetbo]

“Why do you need a lottery win, you’ve got patreon” for thread title pls.

 

[Geetbo]

Jack while we’ve got you, can I tell you just how truly appalling the three tin tender recipe is. I can say with 100% honestly that I’ve tasted more delicious arseholes.

 

[themissingapostrophe]

I wouldn’t be friends with someone if they threw me under a bus like this, just saying

 

[Geetbo]

Congrats to @Falkor and @Emmapism for the marvellous thread title. You each win one of Caroline's hands.

Well, in the last thread, Caroline herself may or may not have turned up to dish the dirt on the slops. Canal consensus appears to be that it was not Caroline at all, but possibly the slop goblin herself making mischief.

Go well, pals x

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Spoiler: Shame on her- SB stuff

I can’t believe she has just told twitter this.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Oh lord

 

[Lazarus]

Oh, she's going to be piiiiiiiiised. Apologies for sweary word Manc Bee.

I love how theres still fraus who apologise to Manc for even saying ‘hell’ and then there’s Geetbo saying he’s munched on arseholes that taste better than Jack’s food without flinching

 

[jenny2603]

I've popped this behind a spoiler because it relates to the parody account and didn't want to upset anyone. I just found this squigs response to a tweet of theirs amusing.

Spoiler: Parody account and amusing squig.

 

[colouredlines]

Oh lord

View attachment 1682027

I can't wait for this. Honestly. It sounds amazing.

Spoiler alert for potential participants: Jack's shopping tips are -

a) spend hours and hours doing a stocktake, then buy what you've already got at home. Don't keep a running stocktake - start from scratch next week.

b) don't make any kind of meal plan, but do divide your list into protein, carbs, fruit/veg, other. This is more effective than actually thinking in advance about what you want to cook/eat because...reasons.

c) shopping on a budget requires HUGE EMOTIONAL LABOUR. Be prepared to take a day off to get ready, and another to recover.

d) I hope you're bald, because the first casualty of war is shampoo.

 

[CarolineWhoHasHands]

Hello again,

Seems I'm verified now after sending lots of evidence so I'm back! I have neither the time or patience to faff about doctoring things, by the way but I can understand why you would be sceptical.

I am with my kids as they're off school for the spooky holiday, but when I get a few minutes I'll sit down and try to figure out how to quote from the old thread into this one (pointers appreciated) and I'll answer some questions... maybe even flash my sought after digits

Thanks for your patience while I was waiting for verification!

 

[jenny2603]

YAAAAAAAAAAS! This is amazing. Sorry but I am obsessed with squigs who think Jack is in charge of supermarkets. Send helpos.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

 

[jenny2603]

Oh dear Jack. I haven't seen anyone accusing you of being drunk for ages. Loads of folk on Twitter are accusing you of having a cocaine problem, though. Hope that helps, go well, pal etc.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

 

[Foxvint]

View attachment 1679995

No Anna Wintour I will not appear on the cover of Vogue. Give it to an uglier girl and give her the same fee

 

[Lucy Aeroplane]

Anyway, I’m a bit disappointed I missed CWHH, it would have been nice to ask her if she, as a friend of Jack’s for two decades, was there for any of the manipulative drama she caused for some perfectly nice people from community groups a while back.

There are reasons Jack doesn’t publicise any of the good local stuff that goes on in Southend - or participate in planning and delivering it herself - just does the odd vague twitter post adjacent to the Southend TT branch. She’s not part of it. Over the years she’s alienated much of the VCS and a good number of council staff and even councillors by being a drama llama/attention-seeker, and by bullying or manipulating more than one well liked individual. I don’t think there can be anyone who *doesn’t* know that if they’ve really been friends with her as long as CWHH said she has.

(I’m totes in the “CWHH was Jack” camp.)

 

[Potatoes O’Houlihan]

Sorry but I saw this so you now have to.
A member of the comments club writes in response to putrid duvet/dog biscuits post :

WOMBFRUIT

(Sorry didn’t mean to leave a squiggle after doggy, pls ignore that)

Also, here’s Jackquie shaming her son yet again...

Eta sorry if someone wants to spoiler these because it’s a bit triggery I’m not sure how to spoiler a picture x

 

[Geetbo]

I love how theres still fraus that apologise to Manc for even saying ‘hell’ and then there’s Geetbo saying he’s tasted arseholes more delicious than Jack’s food without flinching

I honestly think the only time I offended @MancBee was when I said I wanted to wank ainsley off the other day.

 

[jenny2603]

FORENSIC Squig! Unless of course the commissioning editors started beating a path to Jacks door when she went for the cheap laugh with a but dyslexia tacked on to make it less cheap laughy.