Jack Monroe #318 I lie - for a living!

[Jelly Bean]

What a horrid spiteful little shite Jack is about the trifle winner.

And am I going mad but is she pricing the ingredients for it in the way she never does for her abominations? She says one tbsp cornflour is 85p, meaning the packet - but in her recipes she would say one tbsp cornflour is 2p or something like that.
Fucking nasty hypocrite.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[Veronicaaa]

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Spoiler: Winner family- upsetting

 

[catgoldo]

First time poster here. As a researcher (not with the ONS, but still a researcher) I felt compelled to comment on the whole ‘mishap’ earlier this week. Misreading results to confirm ones own hypothesis is bad anyway but even dangerous when that misread is amplified by the press and having a following. This is even worse because she is essentially trying to fight someone saying the same thing she is - that any Inflation hits the poor more than the rich. Of course it does. But that she’s chosen to make a stand on the inflation itself being higher for the poor is just confusing the issue and its obvious she’s more interested in stroking her ego and proving herself right than the truth.

Anyway, apologies for being suuper late to this! I don’t know how much you’ve covered it, because working 100 hours a week I don’t get much time to read hundreds of tattle threads

 

[jenny2603]

I'm just imagining Jack's entry to the brothel. The plucky young urchin, bothering punters at the door with a chirpy, 'crust of bread mister- me and the little 'un are starving'. After several attempts at chasing the urchin with a broom, the madam appears in a cloud of heady perfume and says 'tell you what luv, we've got a sad 'orse out the back, you make him smile and I'll give you a job. "Cor" exclaimed the urchin. Twenty minutes go by and madam floats out the back on a heady cloud of perfume and cheap air freshener to see how the urchin is getting on with the sad 'orse. "I've just invented lasagne" says the urchin. "It was the best ever" says the horse. "Your hired" says the madam, headily in a perfumed kind of way.

 

[Lazarus]

There’s no good time to bring this back to the group, but I feel today is probably as good a time as any.
The trifle presented in a rusty light fitting that looks like 20 B&H in an ashtray that’s had dregs of a can poured on it.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

View attachment 1314343
View attachment 1314344

Content warning sex work & exploitation

Omg more fucking fool you then hun. What a fucking idiot, I’m sorry I know this isn’t radical like left wing MC Twitter sex work is work love but fuck OFF did you join traumatised women (with care leavers, trauma survivors, and drug dependent women over represented in sex work populations) when you’ve got a multi millionaire grandad and solidly middle class parents who’d have easily had a combined salary close to if not exceeding £100k pa? Just fuck OFF you nasty beast! Also how were you doing this and still skint? It’s not like you’d have suffered like the trafficked girls brought in from war torn or economically fucked countries who are financially exploited and literally enslaved. Sorry but British women on the whole are so lucky that this isn’t a thing that happens to us, there was a ch4 documentary (big ups LJC) where schools and government are having to teach girls and women in their country (can’t remember where sorry) about the realities of groomers and what hell it’s like when they come over to try and protect them. Jack has NO IDEA.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Good grief.

 

[colouredlines]

Jack Monroe on Jamie Oliver: 'I've never made a recipe of his that hasn't worked' | The Cook's Cook

A chance cookbook purchase turned Jack Monroe on to a cheeky, chatty, more confident way with food

www.theguardian.com

Note: this article was published in October 2018, almost five years after A Girl Called Jack. Jack signed to her current publisher earlier in 2018, so Penguin (original publisher) did not force her to write this.

 

[Pocahontas]

Handmade | vegan | artisan | soy | string wick | repurposed glass | birthday | wedding | thankyou gifts

100 % upcycled handcrafted candles, made on the stroke of 1am in Southend.

These candles have a strong ‘busy working kitchen’ scent, as the name suggests. Perfect for lovers of all meat scents. Choose from: Budget Sausage, Chicken Dripping, Bacon Scraps, Fish Supper, and Steak and Oysters (£5 more).

A must have for a homely decoration, soft soft ambience and to unlock the meat sweats.
General instruction:

Do not burn candles for more than 10 minutes at a time.
Place candle on a heatproof surface.
Do not place in proximity of other open flames.
Keep candles away from pets - they’ll want to eat them.


I hope you enjoy my candles! If you have any questions, please remember I can’t ride a bicycle and have ADHD.

 

[Clovis]

This piece is entitled "light on, light off" by I, Clovis.

 

[Satisfying Click]

Hello Jubilee fraus!

Small trifle related recap:

Jack has decided to make 'her own' version of the Jubilee Trifle, as she claims the original will cost approx £35 to make. She said she will call it Peasants pudding [sic] with no hint of irony and claims her version will cost £6-7 to make.

Delicious morsels of Jack thinking she is dishing up schadenfreude, such as this, when actually, it comes across as incredibly smug.

This is so mean, even for 'please leave me alone' Jack, to deliberately try and undermine an amateur baker who won a competition out of over 5000 entries, with a personal story of how it came about...

 

[Thank(space)you]

TD going ALL IN on the Tragedy Trifle right now. We love to see it.

Queen TD

 

[Lazarus]

Frau’s, I’m sorry to be a spoilsport, but if pregnancy needs to be speculated on, please could it be spoilered?
Countless failed attempts and BMI too high to be considered by the NHS, then by the time the BMI came down I was too old.
seeing how Jack parented her child first time round was bad enough…

 

[BubbleDuck]

If it weren’t for the fact that Jack doesn’t have WiFi, a tv or a Netflix subscription, I would have drawn the conclusion that all Jack’s “ knowledge” on brothels came from watching Shameless.

Spoiler: Me-rail

I worked in the sex industry for several years , both while studying and alongside a “ normal” job. The majority of workplaces smelt like dettol and shower gel. The only one I can remember that smelt like masked body odour, stale cigarettes and despair was the one attached to lap dancing club, where to completely generalise , the women working in the brothel part didn’t speak good english, weren’t able to find other work and looking back on it , were probably trafficked .

I chose sex work because the hours were flexible - as already been said, weekday afternoons were pretty busy - , and it paid better than working a retail or bar job . And yes, being a care leaver with childhood trauma probably made it seem more of a valid job to me than maybe it would have to friends who had a more supportive family ( like Jack does). Also, not to blow my own horn , but I was good at it. Sex work is so much more than just having sex with someone, it’s about having people skills and good customer service skills . That’s where Jack would struggle imo

 

[Ellabella]

Howling!

 

[BlendedSlop]

I swear, the EGO on this knob. When has she ever been blamed for a run on anything, except maybe Imodium?

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[NellieBoo]

Jack's just lifting the chicken fat candle idea from a London restaurant that offers a beef dripping candle as one of their courses. No ideas are ever her own.

View attachment 1314402
Image is from The Telegraph, tee hee!

As for the idea of brothels smelling of heady perfume, fuck off Jack, that's from the Sali Hughes 'French whorehouse' perfume playbook. Many punters who use the services go home to partners and wouldn't want to smell of other women. Such a fucking tourist, and not a clever one.

I find her comments 'I was a sex worker' with no other details, ever, really troubling. It's the old happy hooker thing. Like it's something women can dip in and out of to make money. It makes light of the absolute horror of the reality. It's grotesque.