Jack Monroe #226 “Sticky Brown Pooâ€

[Marmalade Atkins]

Here's some Jacks doing their Christmas shopping.

I didn't put much effort into this one.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

Here's some Jacks having a really nice time in the funhouse.

 

[Switchstreetz]

Hey Fraus - it's time to pick a date for the Sloppies!

I'm going to put some options below and you can vote for your preference by using the react pictured next to it.

They will be posted at 6pm on the chosen day (UK time)

Friday 17th
Saturday 18th
Sunday 19th
Monday 20th
Tuesday 21st
Wednesday 22nd
Thursday 23rd

 

[Satisfying Click]

"It's organised in order of popularity."

Jack's going to need some aloe vera for that burn

 

[Powershower]

Please can we have “between Major and Priest” as the next thread title

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

update

Fortnum & Mason's twitter team has ignored Jack's tweet where she requested the Mx title which was already on the drop-down list.


updated update

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Hello lovelies! Sorry to derail, just wanted to pop in and say hello and hope you’re all well. I miss you guys but she’s just such a horror the bants here was no longer enough to block out everything else. I hope to be able to come back soon (although announcing your arrival is just the same as announcing your departure…)

Im working on the basis Jack is still super annoying at best and lying, griftingl, nasty and bullying at worst. You’re all doing the Lord’s work keeping an eye on her and capturing the dirty deletes!

 

[Veronicaaa]

Thanks for that.

Lovely garden though.

Would you like to .... paint it?

 

[Hollaaa]

Send hampos.

 

[JuliaGulia]

Look at the state of it.
I've never seen these before. I actually shrieked out loud, what look is she channeling?

 

[colouredlines]

Spoiler: ED

I really don't think she has an ED. She's certainly not purging; there are lots of physical signs, and she displays none of them. Plus, people who binge for ED reasons tend not to advertise it - during my many, long years of bulimia, I would NEVER have boasted about how much I ate. I think it's a combination of:

* wanting to be the cool girl who's always eating loads of shit without gaining weight
* not eating her own recipes, so being indifferent to the portion sizes
* her weird obsession with wanting people to think she's ill
* attention seeking
* being a raging cunt

On a lighter note, let's not miss the fact that her "secret" to perfect pastry is...butter. In other words, one of the two main ingredients in standard pastry. Well done Jack.

 

[ohcomeon99]

There is a phrase used in fellowships called “Gossip kills” there is a reason why there is Anonymous in the title. People don’t come back if it’s not anonymous and that may lead to their death. I have never in all my years in AA discussed outside the room, and I avoid people like the plague who do.

AND ANOTHER THING (Aware I’m posting like a Chaos Jack today but there is so much Cunt to comment on. Please do/don’t get me sectioned) - I find it fucking insulting how she is acting like this is some cool, exciting club. It’s really not. I nearly died. I’ve had friends and family who have actually died. Addiction and recovery are really serious and when she pisses about with it, I get really mad. It’s a shit thing and not something I’m ashamed of but also not something I am thrilled about.

God help up when she reaches step 9 and amends. The whole point is that the apology is NOT about you I.e. you don’t cause further harm by seeking out people when it would cause them pain. It is also private so if she starts tweeting massive apologies, defo send the men in white coats round my place…..

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Lanie, you inspired me. She really does rock the mullet

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Jack's not that bitch Carole fuckin Baskin, she's Jack Exotic because she's never going to financially recover from this.

 

[Veronicaaa]

 

[Veronicaaa]

OK, so on reflection I think I may have pinpointed why the "Nobody tells you how much tea you’ll drink when you get sober" tweet has annoyed me so much. I think it's because she was already meant to have, what, 2 years sobriety under her belt before she 'relapsed' last year? And yet she's acting like it's all a new thing to her, despite selling her sobriety journey to the highest bidder over 2 previous Christmases. In conclusion, fuck off Jack.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[HotesTilaire]

Remember last Xmas when we were all locked down spending Xmas alone, except you weren’t were you Jack? You reckoned you had bubble buddy there and you had covid and went on a “Boxing Day yomp” round Southend looking for an open chippy. And up the asda. Get in the bin Rik.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Buckle in. Steam funk Jack incoming.