I'm currently in therapy for my mental health. Just talking. I do not gain anything positive from it. I dread the appointments and have crippling panic attacks before hand, I feel awful during it and I often cry and shut myself away for days afterwards. Iv currently had a month off because Iv cancelled and she's been on holiday but I think I'm just done with feeling that way about my appointments. Do you think it's okay to call & quit all together? I'm worried she'll try to force me to stay or keep calling like she sometimes does even after Iv said I don't want to talk. My husband thinks I should call tomorrow and leave the message with her receptionist because talking to the therapist brings me too much anxiety. He sees me everyday he knows it's not working. I'm just scared she'll be angry or something. Sorry for waffling or if this isn't the place to ask
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Unless you're at high risk to yourself and subsequently at high risk of being detained/sectioned, no one is going to force you to stay! She is likely to offer you a follow-up appointment to talk it through and make sure it's the right decision for you/debrief though, and I would recommend you attend that.
No I'm not, this was just a step to make things easier. It's been about 4 months now and if anything it's making me feel worse. We haven't been having any in person appointments due to Covid. So there won't be anything other than a phone call to attend. I think I'm going to ask for an email address to contact her on and correspond that way.
It can be said that sometimes you’ll feel far worse before feeling better, especially if things are being brought up and addressed, that haven’t been at the forefront of your thoughts.
it could also be the therapists style, so it’s worth checking out others in the area (assuming you’re private). I’m on my second therapist. While the first was good, I didn’t feel any benefit from it. This one however, has helped open up things for me to address and I realise I will need one or two more sessions and then I can call it a day.
it could also be the therapists style, so it’s worth checking out others in the area (assuming you’re private). I’m on my second therapist. While the first was good, I didn’t feel any benefit from it. This one however, has helped open up things for me to address and I realise I will need one or two more sessions and then I can call it a day.
I have met with four different therapists in my life. I didn’t like two of them but continued seeing them and got nothing out of it. One therapist I met with only once - it was that bad! And one I truly gained benefit from the experience. If it were me in your shoes, I would give up this therapist and find a new one.
Find someone else before you quit all together.
Thanks for the advice but I'm not open to continuing felling like this anymore. I'm going to phone and quit all together in a bit.
Definitely cancel - and dont feel worried about doing it either. Finding the right therapist is hard - I went through two before I found mine. Similar therapy to you, just talking and dont know how much good it does but I really look forward to my sessions.
If therapy is giving you more anxiety - then it's time to find a new therapist definitely!
Honestly cancel and don't think twice about it. You know it's not working for you. It took me a while to find a therapist that I actually clicked with.
Thank you. I feel better reading the last two responses. I'm not long off the phone. I didn't want to speak to the therapist but the receptionist was amazing. She said that therapy shouldn't make me feel like this way & was really respectful. I just imagined they would push me to stay or force me to or something. I'm going to take a few weeks out before I revisit. I have learned things about myself & healthy coping mechanisms. This morning has been the most positive morning I've had in months.
Good on you! Totally the right thing to do x
I was having counselling last year. It was as a result of infertility and then multiple miscarriages. I found every session annoying and pointless. I found the person very patronising and no amount of writing down my thoughts was going to help! I cancelled the remaining 6 sessions and it was the best thing I did. It’s not for everyone!
Just wanted to say I'm so sorry you have gone through that - I have a similar issue with infertility and I struggle to talk about it in therapy at all.
For me I use therapy as a way of talking things out (apart from the above) and it helps so much. The first therapist I saw wanted me to do tapping and all sorts - I know that has a place and for some is so helpful but I dreaded it, hated going and felt like a complete idiot. So glad I cancelled her now and the lady I use now is lovely. I genuinely look forward to our sessions in a strange way as it helps unmuddle my brain!
@Fettuccine Hope you're still feeling better today and that weight has been lifted!
I felt the exact same. To start with I was really excited to be getting help, and hopeful. I barely leave the house without my husband. I can't function most days without this incredible fear and anxiousness. I'm always on high alert. She would set me tasks like get up and go a walk on your own and tell me it's not difficult and I should just do it. Very easy to say but I'm scared. I feel like she expects me to move at a pace I'm not ready for. She even said the other week that I like feeling this way because my progress is slow. She's told me I'm lazy and unmotivated. Yesterday was good, today I haven't left my bed. I'm glad I cancelled.
Im so sorry about your infertility. Miscarriages are awful Iv had a few myself. Sometime don't understand how hard they can be. I'm sending you love x
Thank you both. I’ve been lucky enough to conceive our little miracle this year so a lot of the pain has gone. I’m sure therapy works so a lot of people and that there are some great therapists around but it certainly doesn’t work for everyone x
Congratulations I was lucky enough to have my daughter 3 years ago. Good luck with your pregnancy
I had a colleague who went to counselling because she lost her mum and was finding the grief difficult to cope with. The counselor told her she was struggling because of her lack of sex life with her husband (WTF). She reported him. That's not to say no one benefits from counselling but you can get some oddballs.
Yeah I really think you need to vibe with the person to get the best results and I clearly didn't. I hope your colleague is doing better
Honestly she sounds like a bad therapist lacking empathy and should never have told you this.
Bacp has a service which I've emailed before where you can get advice about your therapy and they don't push you to make a complaint just offer impartial advice.
Get help with counselling concerns
BACP's Get help with counselling concerns service (formerly Ask Kathleen) provides confidential telephone and email guidance on what to do if you have any concerns about your therapy or your therapist
www.bacp.co.uk
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