Height difference in a relationship? Deal breaker?

[Milwalkeemarion]

He could be the love of your life , why miss out because of a few inches

 

[coconochanel]

Personally Ive never dated anyone shorter then me but I suppose if you get to know him more it might not be a issue. Let us know how the date goes.

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

I need some friendly and non judgemental advice please.

I have recently been chatting to a guy for around a month now, we speak ever day and have a few phone calls. We seem to get on great and the conversation just flows nicely; he isn't sex mad and hasn't sent the usual pictures men seem to do this day and age.

There is just one thing thats bugging me at the moment, and that's the fact he is 3 inches smaller then me in height. I have 5ft 8 and quite stocky and I'm worried we will odd together when we meet.

I have never actually dated a guy shorter then me, although I was seeing a guy a while back who was around the same height and every one made comments.

Suppose my question is has anyone been in this situation or has dated a shorter guy?

 

[MaxieMoo]

She made a comment saying she was 'well jel and that her bed is the only valentine she is getting tonight' his reply ' I'd love to invite but they say 3 is a crowd ' she then goes on to say at least her bed hasnt been stood up.

What am I suppose to make of that?

I suppose it's hard to know what context it was really meant in. For example, I can think of 3 different people who could all say the same thing but imply something different based on how they say it. Does that make sense? I think it's hard to know what that really all meant unless you know their personality enough. If you have doubts about them maybe being a player at least go for a drink / dinner, have a fun night out and if you're not sure at least you gave it a shot?

 

[Minniemousesshoes]

having a type is fine. And not wanting to be with someone short is fine.

My question is about how it’s ok to discuss height as a negative thing so often. ( not just here, I’m sorry this is just the thread that got me due to a few things on insta recently). Would we have had a similar thread on another characteristic such as weight / colour/ size of nose?

 

[coconochanel]

Guys the meeting got cancelled this morning due to storm Dennis cancelling alot of public transport, it's been rescheduled. Bloody weather!

In light of this I happened to stumble across something last night and I'm unsure wether to approach it or not bother. I may be nothing but its now made me more wary.

It is a few commens between the guy in question and another female, now before someone comments about how we aren't together or I'm over reacting I'm fully aware this is the case but when it come to dating this day and age you need to have your wits about you cause you can get hurt.

What kind of comment?

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

I'm short at 5 foot 1 so I wouldn't date someone shorter than me personally. My brothers wife is taller than him, I think it looks odd especially when she's in heels but it works for them, they've been married 9 years. There are plenty of celeb couples with the woman taller than their other half.
Why not meet and see what you think in person?

Is there alot of height difference between them? I don't wear heels never have. We are due to meet but the closer the date gets the more I'm fretting, I know height shouldn't be an issue but it's something new.

 

[KateESJ]

She made a comment saying she was 'well jel and that her bed is the only valentine she is getting tonight' his reply ' I'd love to invite but they say 3 is a crowd ' she then goes on to say at least her bed hasnt been stood up.

What am I suppose to make of that?

have you spoken about being exclusive yet, though? Just chatting to me doesn’t scream ‘exclusive’.
But I’ve also never dated online so I wouldn’t know. I’d say that’s a flirty comment but honestly I don’t think I’d look too much into it if you haven’t even met yet.

 

[Bec3007]

I don’t think height is really an issue if you like a person. I mean I think most woman prefer a taller man but if he’s everything else you like on paper/in person then don’t let his height put you off.

 

[DCICassieStuart]

I'm 5'3" so there aren't too many guys shorter than me (my husband is 5'9") However my friend and her husband have been married for almost 16 years now and together for about 20. She's 5'10" and he's 5'5".

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

Thank you all for you replies, its good to have an insight into something like this.

We haven't actually met yet although it's planned, as a typical women I'm starting to stress about it but not for my previous reasons (height) it's more so will there be that spark that comes across over message, as we get on so well although this week there has been a shift in the how much we are actually talking, he previously stated there is gonna be times when he won't speak as he is busy at work, today has been one of those days. Does it make me sound stupid? As I got so use to talking to him everyday, I've been let down before so I'm convinced it's gonna happen again.

I think I need to stop being such an idiot and just focus on our meeting.

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

I suppose it's hard to know what context it was really meant in. For example, I can think of 3 different people who could all say the same thing but imply something different based on how they say it. Does that make sense? I think it's hard to know what that really all meant unless you know their personality enough. If you have doubts about them maybe being a player at least go for a drink / dinner, have a fun night out and if you're not sure at least you gave it a shot?

Yeah it does make sense. I've been toying with the idea wether to ask him, we have rescheduled but the even weirder thing is I haven't heard off since 8pm Saturday night.

Now I really don't know what to do, maybe binning him off seems like the best thing to do

 

[DCICassieStuart]

I'm 5'3" so there aren't many men shorter than me. My husband is about 5'9"/10", but I had an ex who was 6'6". The height difference was never an issue between us. The fact that he was shagging his ex behind my back was what caused the problem!

She was 5'2" just in case anyone is interested

 

[Scvee13]

Is there alot of height difference between them? I don't wear heels never have. We are due to meet but the closer the date gets the more I'm fretting, I know height shouldn't be an issue but it's something new.

Hes 5ft 7 and she's 5ft 10.

 

[Yellowyellow]

Bit late to this but I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years and he is shorter than me by just over an inch. In fact, shorter guys are 'my type'and I'm much more attracted to someone the same height as me than smaller. My bf is now in a wheelchair, but when he used to stand there was three things that made this height difference an issue:

• Not being able to wear heels to events or nights out, or even heeled boots or doc martens without looking ridiculous.
• Weighing more than him. Since he is quite small it really highlights the fact that I am plus size, and it is sad I cant wear his hoodies or look sexy in his baggy shirts
• His friends and the constant comments about our height difference

None of these are a deal breaker to me. I think it is important to remember that just because he is shorter than you doesn't mean that he should be grateful to be with you on that basis alone. A short guy can be just as much of a dick as a tall guy.
There are some positives!

• Can look him straight in the eyes while walking together
• Doesn't tend to get hit on by girls as much (although my bf does because he is quite fit)
• Easier to take pictures together

There is no harm in trying it out. Many guys are off put by a taller girl, so as long as you both dont mind it's fine! I'm happy!

 

[MaxieMoo]

Thank you all for you replies, its good to have an insight into something like this.

We haven't actually met yet although it's planned, as a typical women I'm starting to stress about it but not for my previous reasons (height) it's more so will there be that spark that comes across over message, as we get on so well although this week there has been a shift in the how much we are actually talking, he previously stated there is gonna be times when he won't speak as he is busy at work, today has been one of those days. Does it make me sound stupid? As I got so use to talking to him everyday, I've been let down before so I'm convinced it's gonna happen again.

I think I need to stop being such an idiot and just focus on our meeting.

No, you are not an idiot at all. It's normal to get a bit nervous and over think things. Fingers crossed your meet up goes well. Keep us updated.

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

What kind of comment?

She made a comment saying she was 'well jel and that her bed is the only valentine she is getting tonight' his reply ' I'd love to invite but they say 3 is a crowd ' she then goes on to say at least her bed hasnt been stood up.

What am I suppose to make of that?

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

Guys the meeting got cancelled this morning due to storm Dennis cancelling alot of public transport, it's been rescheduled. Bloody weather!

In light of this I happened to stumble across something last night and I'm unsure wether to approach it or not bother. I may be nothing but its now made me more wary.

It is a few commens between the guy in question and another female, now before someone comments about how we aren't together or I'm over reacting I'm fully aware this is the case but when it come to dating this day and age you need to have your wits about you cause you can get hurt.

 

[SunshineDreamer]

It’s not a deal breaker to me but I do love that my husband is a good few inches taller than me.

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

have you spoken about being exclusive yet, though? Just chatting to me doesn’t scream ‘exclusive’.
But I’ve also never dated online so I wouldn’t know. I’d say that’s a flirty comment but honestly I don’t think I’d look too much into it if you haven’t even met yet.

We have touched base on the matter, but obviously in till we meet then there is no knowing what might happen.

I wouldn't judge him based on a silly online comment. At the moment he's a single man and people comment things online all the time that mean nothing! If you get on well then just go for it.. you've got nothing to lose. You might click and get on really well, he might be lovely, if not, you hopefully had a nice evening out anyway.

It's hard not to judge due to past experience, I know you shouldn't let your pass dictate your future.