Gender Discussion #45

[Ruby’s mum]

My pronouns are fuck/off

Mine are terf/bigot

 

[Mbouzer]

'Successful pregnancy requires more than a uterus and sufficient exposure to progesterone and estradiol'

No shit.

I've had two babies, so I know pregnancy through lived experience but I don't claim to be an expert but this, even to my limited-ish knowledge is absolutely absurd. Your organs literally rearrange themselves to accommodate the growing womb, your cravings can have meaning (ie certain things if low on iron etc), the baby can provide the mother with certain cells and vuce versa...of course there's more to growing a literal human being than just the basic 'essentials'. Why on earth is anyone even considering this? Pregnancy affects every part of you in a way that cannot be replicated in a male body.

The very idea is a dystopian horror show.

Exactly this!

And breastfeeding is truly amazing. Babies salvia transfers through the nipple which sends signals to your brain to adapt and change the milk composition to what baby needs at that time, it can produce antibodies if baby or mother are sick, contains higher levels of the hormone melatonin at night to help baby sleep, adapts to babies age so as baby gets older milk becomes fattier and more dense to give them everything they need to grow. Breastfeeding during the early days also helps the uterus contract to help it return to its normal size after birth. Its such a complex process that the female body just does without us even realising, the fact that people think pumping a male full of artificial hormones to even try and induce lactation is absolutely mind boggling to me and will never be the same as a female breastfeeding, its just too complex and I refuse to believe it can ever be mimicked.

 

[weeweegie]

The staff member was in the wrong.
It's not for customers on an ' arrive & being served, then leave" basis to have to assume genders , or preferred pronouns. Basic civility goes a long way, and if someone calls me " love" , or something , I'm not going to boil over , confront someone and clap in their face over it. Certainly not in a work situation. Confrontational and in the customers face . Aggressive to someone else.
You can't tell me that an employer such as Costa doesn't have basic customer services seminars or basic training.
Some people have to learn the hard way that they have to be responsible for their actions.
He got the sack.
He will now have plenty of time to reflect upon it- at his leisure.

Exactly. As women we get called lots of names by strangers, staff serving us, workies etc. To name a few where I’m from, darling, love, hen, sweetheart, doll. From men and women. I don’t always appreciate the sweetheart from men I don’t know as it’s bordering on creepy (depending on the person). This is just a fact of life for women. We don’t flip our lids and scream at the person calling us it. You just move on. My husband gets mate, fella, big man, sometimes son. He cares not a jot. What is wrong with these they/thems they think the world is against them but we actually just don’t GAF.

 

[soph30]

It’s so bloody rude to assume things about people after they have died.

And great way to demean the achievements of a WOMAN from a time we had fewer opportunities

 

[Nelly's mum]

I don't have an issue with Linehan, as far as I can see he is challenging the bullshit at the heart of trans ideology.
I haven't seen any hate speech or red flags from him, it appears he just thinks it is bollocks because it is! And I'm ok with men having a voice in this madness as well as women.

That TIM shoving a tampon up his arse, how stupid, pervy and disrespectful can one man be ?? As if a vagina is in any way similar to his arsehole, or that him inserting a tampon in his arse would feel like using a tampon does for a woman
That is some sick thinking going on there - and yet they say this is not a fetish?

 

[Dinate]

You know, without going off topic, I can tell you that ordinarily I am the very last person in the world who would vote Conservative for a multitude of reasons. However, regardless of the importance of all other issues, I now see this trans-idelogy as an existential threat to women and I will not vote for a party which doesn't the protection of my rights as a woman seriously.

If Starmer and Davey cannot openly acknowledge a simple and fundamental biological fact, then, not only are they being disingenuous, they are also making it clear that they have no regard for the hard fought rights of half of the population and are prepared to allow the erosion of said rights under the guise of being 'compassionate'.

 

[MmmB777]

Yes I agree it is brainwashing but also very confusing for the children. There's also bound to be trouble ahead with 'misgendering' either by the kids or the parents.

I think it’s disgusting tbh. I worked with reception kids for many years and it actually pains me someone this vain is making them partake in utter fucking nonsense. Personally think it’s a safeguarding issue because children in a school setting should know and be able to believe you are who you say you are and the boundaries of reality shouldn’t be broken down in that respect.
Also how does this work for poor kids with EAL, global delay, autism, learning disabilities. It’s not fucking fair and the priority is the kids. Always and all the time.

 

[Lucy Aeroplane]

I told my dog she doesn't belong on the couch. She told me I was telling her she didn't exist. My dog has now disappeared. Help.

Sounds like cat behaviour to me, how does your dog identify?

 

[Deeznutslol]

I’ve mentioned this on the Busy Philipps thread. Whose daughter was a non binary they/them at 12 who is just back to being a girl and she/her at almost 15 now but you will still get militant morons in the comments saying things like isn’t Birdie they/them? And back when Busy announced she was nb anytime she posted a picture of her there was a person (probably a few people) who would ‘correct’ anyone who called Birdie she/her. It honestly annoyed me so much. Busy even mentioned on her podcast that Birdie didn’t care if people used she/her but these freaks still took time out their day to righteously correct people Whyyyyyyyyy
---

I don’t know how many scary places these people have been but they have lived a sheltered life if they think what we are saying is scary Well actually it is scary when you read all the horrendous articles we post about ‘gender affirming’ surgery gone wrong and the plight of detransitioners but who cares about them eh? The world just pretends they don’t exist and therefore, they don’t. Idiots.

The people who obsess over correcting others for using the ‘wrong’ pronouns do it because they love the sense of power and control it gives them.
Whenever they drop the line “ACKCHULLY so and so goes by THEY/THEM, not SHE/HER”, what they’re really saying is “change the way you’re speaking and apologize immediately, or I’m going to slap you with some negative social capital by tarring you with the dreaded ‘transphobe’ brush”.
They get off on it and it’s absolutely pathetic .
The best way to deal with them is to just mock them and laugh at them lmao.

 

[HockyRorror]

YUCK. A group called Pissed off T’s staged another piss protest outside the EHRC. What is WRONG with these people? Part of their batshit statement:

We placed 90 litres of trans piss outside the building and in their revolving doors, rendering the EHRC more explicitly what it already was: an inaccessible mess. Pouring piss is an anarchist act of resistance that stakes an urgent and lingering claim on our basic human rights. It foregrounds the public embarrassment we experience as targets of the media and the state, and that we in turn also experience when we are forcibly prohibited from single sex spaces such as restrooms. IF YOU TAKE AWAY OUR TOILETS WE’LL MAKE ONE OF YOUR DOORSTEP. Our zaps are pungent proof in the noses of our oppressors that you cannot rinse us from the record or legislate us out of existence. We are here and we need to piss.

 

[holliebollie]

On another thread talking about period pants: ‘women and people who menstruate’ Don’t you dare forget to mention the female NBs and trans men who are… oh yes, women! The former is usually seen in baggy dungarees with badly dyed hair or full ‘man costume’ for the latter.

Let’s think of some things we never see when talking about men:
- premature ejaculation- men and people who struggle getting erections with their penis
- premature balding- men and people who go bald early due to higher testosterone (actually we can add women to this after they pump their body of T and look 45 at 23)
- prostrate cancer- men and people with prostates up their arseholes
- testicular cancer- men and people who have testicles hanging near their PENIS
- men’s mental health - men and those with XY genes, typically has a penis. We have a whole month talking about growing a moustache to get men talking about MH. No sign of ‘… and people who grow facial hair’
- male fertility issues- men and people whose testicles produce sperm.

Has anyone in real life ever seen this phenomenon but for men? I have never. At least the poster said women first…small mercies

 

[DoraMaar]

Happy Friday

 

[JustHereForTheAgriculture]

Yeah I’d imagine it was likely a case of
‘Are you being looked after?’
‘Yeah, that guy over there serving me’

Feels a bit victim blame-y to assume she was being nasty and/or it was just a misunderstanding on his part.

 

[IdeletedbutI'mbackagain]

Another from twitter

What the actual fuck!!?

Honestly this is just child abuse, fuck these child abusers. We need to be less "kind" and "tolerant" and just call them what they are fucking child abusers.

 

[JustHereForTheAgriculture]

NOBODY IS BORN IN THE WRONG BODY. IT IS LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR A HUMAN TO BE PHYSICALLY BORN INTO THEIR “WRONG” BODY. NOT DIRECTING THE SHOUTING AT YOU, BUT JEEZ, HOW MUCH MORE DO THESE BASIC THINGS HAVE TO BE PUBLICLY SAID?

The thing I always come back to is we don’t tell disabled people they were born in the wrong body.
Your disability is just part of you. Something you have to accept and live with.
Would I have chosen not to have my disability? 100%. But it doesn’t mean I was born in the wrong body and that I can’t be at peace until I become my true fully sighted self.
But yet if you don’t like your sex, or what people call you because of your sex, this means you’re born in the wrong body?
How?!?!
Even on the more moderate side of things you see the born in the wrong body argument and it just makes no sense.

 

[blahblahboring]

That video makes me so uncomfortable. He was so aggressively in her face, clapping his hands right in front of her. And no doubt he would claim that she had committed ‘literal violence’ against him, presumably for misgendering him.
The sooner this movement is over, the better. Also, him calling her a ‘Karen’ is gross. Such a crappy way to dehumanise women, especially those who speak up.

 

[weeweegie]

I wonder what the gender woo crowd think about people like me (and probably most of you reading here), not having a gender identity? I honestly don’t. I don’t believe in it. I’m female, end of story. No gender or gender identity. I’ll wear what I want, have my hair how I want. I can’t control how others perceive me, none of us can and you are wasting your energy if you even try. So if someone were to call me he/him then so what! It genuinely baffles me how the notion of an innate ‘gender identity’ has taken hold as this sacred thing.

Also whenever I hear gender ‘joy’ or ‘euphoria’ it makes me really uneasy. I have never been euphoric about being female. Why would anyone? It’s just who you are. They would probably think that makes me male or non binary. It shocks me how backwards it all is, and young ones think they are so progressive but they are actually reinforcing every stereotype the previous generation tried to get rid of.

 

[HoGi]

Oh my goodness, YESSSSS! This is a snark site and people are ghastly about celebs etc (me included at times) but if you dare to misgender someone, you’re completely vilified. Like the worst thing in the world is calling a man, a man. I was also disappointed the other day when someone in the reading chat thread said that the Gender thread is a ‘scary place to be’. Like, so condescending and patronising because we are making the most of a safe, anonymous space to discuss our concerns about a very real issue but to these handmaidens, we are just mean ol’ bitches punching down on the poor lil trans community

The scary place to be comment made me laugh. People will happily read horror/thriller books with all sorts of depraved themes but draw the line at calling a man a man.

 

[Notworthy]

I saw that Dylan mulvaney did a video with Judy Bloome about female puberty? What the fuck does he know about that?
God, he is absolute scum.

She's absolute scum for indulging him

 

[MmmB777]

They seem quite dubious scenarios, too. How often would you say to a member of staff "he's gone to get me something"? It wouldn't be much clearer, because 'he' would presumably be elsewhere getting you something.

I'd only ever say "It's okay, I'm being served" - not out of politeness for pronouns, but because it feels natural and I've heard lots of other customers say that. I suppose it doesn't feed into the narrative, though.

I remember one time I got misgendered many years ago when I was working on a supermarket checkout. A mother was approaching with her child and said: "give it to the lady" before looking at me (I suppose she'd gone by probability that a checkout worker was more likely to be female). I said hello cheerfully and she saw me and heard my voice and apologised. I just laughed because there was no harm done. Honestly who cares what a random customer thinks about you anyway?!

Honestly I’m not about to have this debate. There are countless scenarios you might use he or him when being served, or maybe a Buddy or mate was too much for the precious one too. The fact he makes pissy little videos about it happening, shows it happens. Because he is a man and looks like a man. Like you say, there’s no excuse for his behaviour regardless. She’s just getting a fucking coffee. They’ve not come to persecute the bloke.