Gender Discussion #25

[Sweetcouchpotato]

This just cropped up in my targeted ads - I was heartened to see the comments!

I would have agreed with the comments but I'm intersex and the intersex community is changing fast. More and more people who are trans "and also intersex" are joining, more and more conditions that are not traditionally DSDs are included (like hypospadias and PCOS) and while we used to gatekeep and say intersex is a biological sex, not an identity, now I keep seeing "your identity is valid. You are welcome here" posts in intersex spaces when some TiM pops up to say he's always had big emotions or he gets a tummy ache once a month or his legs were never hairy so he thinks he's intersex. I'd give anything not to be intersex because it's a shitty existence but the community is now flocked with people desperately trying to get diagnosed as intersex, largely to "validate" them being trans or non binary.

Intersex people are completely different from trans which used to be mainstream in our community but is now seen as transphobic in those same spaces. We're born with a mix of sexual characteristics so it makes sense for us to "identify" with whichever sex works best for us physically or socially, because we have a medical condition and for many of us intersex people it isn't just a matter of going by chromosomes - so it's a mildly interesting discussion but hardly the most important one of our time.

 

[Falkor]

We don't sell puppies or kittens younger than eight weeks old because it's not considered healthy for them to leave their mothers before that age, but we'll happily do it with human babies

 

[Sea]

This Trans Woman Kept Her Beard And Couldn’t Be Happier

“I’m widening the bandwidth of how to be a woman.” Alex Drummond talks to BuzzFeed News about why she kept her beard after transitioning – and how others react.

www.buzzfeed.com

they identify as a lesbian !
View attachment 1220281

I identify him as a pretentious .

'but certainly I draw out the inner lesbian in women!' No you're a hetero man in a dress having sex with straight women.

 

[maytoseptember]

I’ve been told off for my ‘anti trans’ comments on the Busy Philipps thread. I was actually wondering how long it would take for someone to comment. She actually thought she could tell me what/what not to say and where to say it. Utterly bizarre but quite funny really. People are so feckin mental. She CANNOT UNDERSTAND why I would take issue with being referred to as a ‘person who bleeds’. Just can’t understand why I’d not like that!

But don’t you get it @weeweegie, that person is so modern, so enlightened, so kind?

This is the problem with women and gender ideology. Prioritising the projection of a liberal image over everything else. Wanting and needing to be seen as better than other women, those bigots, those TERFs.

We talk a lot about male TRAs and the damage they do, but probably not enough about the females. The self hating TIFs who want to erase themselves and take other women with them. The pick me handmaidens who don’t have the life experience to even see the ways women are oppressed.

Depressing, isn’t it?

 

[nothanksbabes]

i have never seen the world bend and adhere to a (so called) activist movement so quickly before. the exhausting, soul sucking, never ending fight against poisons like misogyny, racism, homophobia etc have been on going for CENTURIES but since the birth of idk tik tok (rough timeframe) the world has done nothing but bend over backwards (im sure it has nothing to do with it being the only "movement" backed and perpetuated by men and for men ) yet even with the red carpet, all see is demanding, whinging entitled woman haters. it'll never be enough until "cis women" are completely erased and completely treated like non-human beings - were already half way there as it is!

This is how I know it's not a genuine civil rights movement. When have capitalist corporations and the police ever thrown themselves behind a genuine grassroots civil rights movement before? Never. And we need to ask ourselves why now?

Love how they say ‘Latin prefix’ as though the use of cis to describe biological sex has been around since Roman times, when in fact it’s only crept into usage within the last decade. Putting that aside, we’re not allowed to misgender trans people, deadname them or say what’s staring us in the face when it comes to biological reality for fear of being cancelled, losing our jobs, banned from Twitter or even reported to the police.

But yeah sure, object to the use of ‘cis’ and we’re the fascists

Pure DARVO again, deny, attack, reverse victim and offender.

What is compelling people to think and identify themselves a certain way or else suffer consequences if not fascism?

To be "cisgender" means your gender identity matches your sex. By definition to call myself "cis" means I identify with the gender roles associated with womanhood. There is no way to describe this without a reliance on gender stereotypes.

To say thay I identify with the harmful gender stereotypes enforced on me and other women since birth (based on our sex) is deeply fucking offensive. I don't, but it hasn't made me "trans", it's made me a fucking feminist.

 

[ButtonDownTheHutches]

Sorry I just need to vent. I’m not sure if anyone here uses Reddit but every single ‘lesbian’ subreddit is literally 70% anime trans kids, you can spot the posts as mile of as well ‘girls are so pretty ooo’ ‘I just wanna snuggle a cute girl >.<‘. I can literally see a post and know the person post history before I even look at the profile.

im not even arsed about trans women being there but omg is there any space left for real grown up adult lesbians? Like when 50% of the posts are trans or non binary people they’re defo just using it as some weird validation thing - those numbers are not reflective of the percentage of cis lesbians vs trans lesbian, so why is it so imbalanced!?

same with lesbian dating apps tbh - there was like 7 lesbians in my radius on bumble and three were trans woman and like 3 more were couples looking for thirds (don’t get me started on that) the math just isn’t adding up here.

please someone say they know what I mean about these posts and I’m not crazy thanks x

edit: just to add this example, I just can’t! It’s this weird cosplay as a cutesy girl. I want to discuss being a lesbian, dating, homophobia. Not a space to act out your weird fantasy

Hang on, are you suggesting that lesbians don’t just spend their time having cutesy pillow fights whilst wearing baby doll pyjamas and giggling?

 

[dodo789]

The classic case of, so woke they end up bigoted and don’t even realise it…

 

[nothanksbabes]

I don't believe men as a class act appallingly towards women, or vice versa. As another poster has said there are bad apples out there of either gender, but most people are good at heart (to paraphrase Anne Frank).

Are you for real? I don't think individual men need to sit around feeling ashamed of being men (what's the point?), but the fact is that men commit ~98% of violent crime and sexual offenses. Two women a week in the UK are killed by male partners or former partners. Marital rape was only outlawed in the UK 1990s. Convictions for rape are currently around 2%. There are 650 million women alive today who were married - to adult men - as children. There are still countries where women cannot vote.

Women can be arseholes - in fact we highlight many of them on this thread. Pointing out statistical facts about male violence and oppression against women and girls does not preclude women from behaving badly. But as a sex class men oppress women and that is a demonstrable fact.

 

[eyespybs123]

I was watching reruns of One Born Every Minute (my comfort show, don't ask ) and there was a girl giving birth (obviously) and her triplet brother came to see her, but he was transitioning to be a woman. And I'm sure I saw this episode when it aired but it was odd looking at it with fresh eyes! He was wearing high heels to the delivery suite, long bleach blonde hair extensions and huge fake eyelashes, nothing against wearing any of these things, but it's clear that for the boy, being a girl is nothing more than stereotypes. Anyway. There's no actual point to this story other than an observation of when you're newly GC it's strange to rewatch things and view them in an entirely different light!

 

[LaLa247]

Sorry I just need to vent. I’m not sure if anyone here uses Reddit but every single ‘lesbian’ subreddit is literally 70% anime trans kids, you can spot the posts as mile of as well ‘girls are so pretty ooo’ ‘I just wanna snuggle a cute girl >.<‘. I can literally see a post and know the person post history before I even look at the profile.

im not even arsed about trans women being there but omg is there any space left for real grown up adult lesbians? Like when 50% of the posts are trans or non binary people they’re defo just using it as some weird validation thing - those numbers are not reflective of the percentage of cis lesbians vs trans lesbian, so why is it so imbalanced!?

same with lesbian dating apps tbh - there was like 7 lesbians in my radius on bumble and three were trans woman and like 3 more were couples looking for thirds (don’t get me started on that) the math just isn’t adding up here.

please someone say they know what I mean about these posts and I’m not crazy thanks x

edit: just to add this example, I just can’t! It’s this weird cosplay as a cutesy girl. I want to discuss being a lesbian, dating, homophobia. Not a space to act out your weird fantasy

 

[judgejohndeed]

Some women are violent yes but female to male violence is not a systemic problem in the same way that male to female violence is? This is not a single issue thread either, male violence is a sex and gender issue. The comments about having nice husbands etc are irrelevant - the men who rape and kill women are also sons, brothers, husbands etc. ‘Othering’ those men as monsters is dangerous and what they want.

 

[Scotch Mist]

 

[Vanelope]

Severely disturbed violent individual who should be in a secure hospital, and solitary confinement. Not a womens prison.

 

[Sea]

Seen on twitterView attachment 1234614View attachment 1234615

I think it's unprofessional and inappropriate for a political party to be 'sending out big hugs x'.
Ffs you're not texting your mate, Hun.

 

[maytoseptember]

I see Megan Fox is transing her son (who is 6) because he likes to wear a dress. There's nothing wrong with that but she is saying that 'he suffers'. Why should a small child be suffering he's only going to suffer if she confuses him.
Doesn't she realise its probably just a phase and kids like dressing up in whatever is available.

Reading that yesterday made me want to puke. He’s only suffering if he’s being fed messages that boys wearing dresses are wrong. And instead of being cool about it, she’s buying books about trans kids? Maybe that’s why he’s suffering? Maybe up until that point he thought he was a boy in an Elsa dress, but now he’s being told that kids like him are in the wrong bodies and need to change their name and identity?

 

[Peachsquish]

With all the media coverage of what’s happening in America with roe v wade, it is making my blood boil the all I see is it being talked about as ‘abortion rights’. People are actively avoiding using the word women and I hate it. These are WOMEN’S rights, that WOMEN have been fighting for for decades, so excuse me if it stings to have the word completely erased. I am not just a person with a uterus, I am a woman FFS!

Saw this on fb

 

[glamorous]

I'm glad women can privately talk online about transgender without being labelled as a terf or transphobic now. It sucks we still live in a society where we can't publicly say it though. My male friends claim I'm transphobic and I'm the only female that doesn't like trans "women" which is obviously BS.

I seriously wish there was a forum where only FEMALES talk. Even xx fourms have nasty males.


Also, I hate when MtF say women don't have facial hair or other nonsense. Like yes we do but we are forced to shave it.

 

[Platformcrocs]

Male violence against women exists and its not up for debate. It's also not the responsibility of women to come up with solutions to prevent it. I'm not sure why there's so much back and forth about this.

 

[Scotch Mist]

It didn't happen but if it did it was more like:

Beautician: "So is it this area specifically we're concentrating on Today?"
Client: "Yeah just between my "girls"
B: *forced polite chuckle*
C: "They're all-natural, you know?"
B: "Oh, I see.... So I'm just going to..."
C: "I get so many compliments on them!"
B: "Do you? so if you just lie back comfortably..."
C: "Oh sorry, what are us ladies like when we start chatting?"
B' *weak smile*

Equals Beautician talking about them all appointment. People who live in an online echo chamber do not understand social cues so end up talking inappropriately and not picking up on the other person's discomfort.

People who were not socialised as women do not understand how women speak to each other. He volunteered that nugget himself by describing an interaction that no woman would recognise as female behaviour. Creepy.

I was talking to a friend at the weekend and she was telling me about a relative who as a middle aged man suddenly announced that he was becoming a woman at a family event (upstaging the entire event). He was married with 2 children.

She said the next time she saw him he was dressed as a woman at a family funeral where he again made a big fuss and then inappropriately showed his bra to her teenage daughters (because women compare bras all the time especially at funerals).

From what she said this person was very attention seeking and desperate for validation. Unfortunately the marriage didn't survive and the children were extremely upset.
I asked if the transition had made him/her happy and my friend said 'no'. The family broke up and one of the kids refused to speak to him ever again.

 

[DoraMaar]

Twitter today...