Erling Haaland

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About time our sexy Viking robot got his own thread.

Post here whether you’re a City fan or just want to ride the Nordic meat shield or both. 👀

Come and join the Haaland train. Choo-Choo hoes x
 
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In the words of John Oliver (sort of): “Step on my throat Erling Haaland, you rudely large man”
 
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He puts Grealish to shame with his short tucks.

He has such beautiful thighs, arms, abs. So beautiful, tanned, blonde. He's amazing.
Grealish is icky so no thanks

He's just beautiful 😍

Split me in half King 🥵🥵

Want him to throw me against the wall like I’m spaghetti and he’s checking to see if I’m done 😍😍
I'm just gonna say I didn't know that was an actual thing until recently 🤣 the spaghetti and the wall

But yes hold my neck against the wall spread my legs and take me
 
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Oh god yes. He could lift me one handed by my throat I reckon. I’m only 5ft 2 🤣. He could throw me about like a sheet in a strong breeze
 
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let's pretend that I wasn't a skeptic up until I saw him with his top off
 
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Thanks for creating this thread. City fan here, and strangely intrigued by our Viking. He is in the prawn category for me (remove the head and the rest is delicious). I am so weirdly attracted to the no-shirt-armband-on look.
 
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A prawn 😭🤣

I think the no shirt, armband look is so attractive… I’d call him Captain whilst getting railed 🥵

Says a lot that he scored against my team and I still want to duck him 🤣.
 
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Thanks for creating this thread. City fan here, and strangely intrigued by our Viking. He is in the prawn category for me (remove the head and the rest is delicious). I am so weirdly attracted to the no-shirt-armband-on look.
Same girl. I love him so much. Sometimes his face scares me sometimes I think it is cute. But his body is banging. He’s like a tall tree I can climb since I’m only 5’1.

I call him Baby Viking on my IG stories and all my other football friends are tired of the two of us 😂

He looks cute here to me

 
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Same girl. I love him so much. Sometimes his face scares me sometimes I think it is cute. But his body is banging. He’s like a tall tree I can climb since I’m only 5’1.

I call him Baby Viking on my IG stories and all my other football friends are tired of the two of us 😂

He looks cute here to me

Baby Viking is so cute 😍. I love that first one. The hair, the thighs 🥵🥵🥵

👀🥵. Wanna sit on his lap and wiggle
 
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Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.