Christmas spending

[JSquared]

I feel guilty for not getting my family as much as I usually would. I’m usually the responsible one to buy for my 4 nephews (their mother is useless & doesn’t get them anything because she spends her money on shite) and this will be the first year I don’t have the £500 that I usually give her (well I take her to the shops and make her buy stuff) and it’s eating at me, I grew up wrapping my own gifts from things I could find around the house I never wanted that for those little kids, but this year I just can’t afford it .. I know it’s not all about money etc but I’m feeling so depressed about it.
I’ve got them pjs and a chocolate treat this year. Haven’t bought for anyone else, simply can’t

you aren’t the one who should feel guilty - maybe this will help her wake up and realise her kids needs to come first.

hope you’re ok - this time of year is so tough for so many x

 

[Pinkpenguinx]

We stopped as a family a few years ago, only buy for my daughter (19) she’s had £150 and will buy for niece and nephew (8 and 6) £30 each, no pressies for adults (parents and partners both sides, bro and his girlfriend or my grandad) and I don’t expect anything back. We all just had an honest convo that we couldn’t afford it and didn’t want to waste money and that Xmas was just about being together, eating and watching crap tv. Everyone chips in for booze and food but it’s not extravagant (just a Sunday lunch with added starter and pud). We all make more of an effort for birthdays as they are individual and far more special for us as a family.
Just have the conversations and people should understand, times are hard and no one should feel guilty for not spending money you haven’t got.

Omg people with actual common sense!
I agree with everything you have said so much

 

[Sunlifeover50]

We are fortunate at the moment. We have a decent income coming in and our bills are fixed. Our disposable income hasn’t changed much but this year I really feel loathed to spend so much on Christmas. I don’t know if it’s just the uncertainty, the mood at the moment or I’m being grumpy. I love Christmas usually but this year I’m struggling to get excited about the slog that’s coming.

I’m still finding things in my kids wardrobes from last year that they’ve barely touched- it goes through me really especially when people are struggling to put their heating on. I think I’ll be ignoring the “insta huns” and having a scaled back December for sure.

 

[candyland_]

This year I am totally out of inspiration for presents....
Plus I calculated I have around 30 presents for friends and family.
Plus extra 10 for friends kids...

It's so hard to buy them all presents, BCS nowadays everyone has everything.

Maybe this year I make my presents... Maybe handmade chocolate, cookies, candles....
Probably next weekend I should start with preparations.

There’s no need to buy for so many friends and their kids. I would cut this down - they would probably be glad in a way.

 

[August]

I did have a budget but my boy understands more this year now that he’s about to turn 4. He wants paw patrol tower, a giant hot wheels garage, air max 90s, Nike blazers, Tommy Hilfiger coat, and a scooter. I’ve stuck a load of it on credit lol fk it.

 

[BettyCrockerr]

I think it depends on the child, if their friends have the latest Iphone, trainers, PlayStation most kids will also want it so they don't feel left out. Having the latest fashion item, gadget has been a thing for years wasn't that why school uniform was introduced?

They may want it but that doesn’t automatically mean they are going to get whatever they want.

 

[iLoveMeSomeCanoles]

In past years I've spent around £20 per couple/person for gifts - I buy for 3 couples (aunt and uncle and 2 cousins and their spouses), 2 teenage second cousins and a neighbour down the road. I spend more on my Mum, probs about £50.

However am currently not working, although I have been putting a small amount by throughout the year to have as "normal" a Christmas as possible, and not increase my debt further unnecessarily. I like to treat myself to the Elemis and L'occitane Christmas TSVs on QVC each year so also saved to accommodate those (although it looks like I might not be getting the Elemis one thanks to Evri ).

This year the adults are getting succulent arrangements in terracotta pots. I've been propagating my succulents over the last two years and been rather successful at it so have plenty to make 4 arrangements. Terracotta pots and saucers are quite cheap and I'll decorate them in some way using stuff I already have. I saw a video by Garden Answer where they made gift "baskets" out of the pots and saucers so I might do that. I reckon it'll be under £10 per item = £40 max.

The teenagers are getting a small gift - I snagged an offer on some grüum products (basically got one set free) and I'll get some chocolate to go with it. So probs £5 each = £10.

My Mum....she's so difficult to buy for. She's not a stereotypical woman so stuff like beauty products etc is of nil interest, she'd prefer stuff like a spare battery for the lawnmower lol. However they're expensive so not getting that. She's been moaning about the tin openers (she has problems with her hands) so might get her an electric one.

Christmas cards: I usually only post one, the rest are hand delivered. I've got plenty left over from previous years. Ditto wrapping paper (brown paper that I decorate).

Food: we've already started a Christmas box, buying a few things each week to put away. Also buying 1-2 items a week for a local collection by a group my Mum goes to that'll be going to the Trussell Trust. We don't have guests for Christmas Day so we don't get a huge turkey or anything.

Anyway, sorry for the novel lol.

 

[August]

did he really say ‘Mum i want a tommy hilfiger coat’

He did. He’s very particular about clothes and food.

You’ve bought your 3 year old child Nike trainers and a fucking designer coat…..?! Are you for real? Why??????!!! I’m sorry that’s not for the benefit of your child.

It’s what he wants. My parents used to spend a lot on us kids. The whole living room would be covered with presents and I loved it. I want to do the same

 

[Katykatykaty]

I save money each month throughout the year to use for Christmas presents and then for food and drink etc. I start adding 2 or 3 bits to each week’s shopping from November onwards. For things like outings etc, most places need booking in advance so I can space the cost of these out. This way, I don’t tend to feel the pinch when it comes to Christmas as everything is generally sorted and budgeted for in advance.

Present wise I set strict budgets for everyone I buy for and where there is a reciprocal gift, we’ve discussed a budget both sides are happy with as we’ve all been tightening our belts in recent years.

4 year old son - £150
3 x nieces/nephews (3-5 years old) - £35 each
4 x parents - £40 each
1 x grandparent - £20
9 x other children - some relatives, some friends (newborn-18 years old) - £10-15

 

[EnoughAlready]

£3000 all in for: presents, food/ drink budget, Boxing Day buffet thrown for family, Petrol (north/ south divide means quite big petrol expenses to visit relatives) food bank donations/ Salvation Army packages my daughters class made up. My own four kids get about 300 each usually. Worked out at 7% of our earnings this year, usually my aim is no more than 5% of annual salary but it’s a sign of the times that it’s gone up this year. I put around £300 away in another account each month, feel fortunate to have been able to have done this year, other years we haven’t had a pot to piss in and we spent what we could afford, I don’t get myself into debt for Christmas a rule I made when we started our family. As long as my lot have a hot Christmas dinner, a board game we can all play together and watching some good tele I call it a successful Christmas, I feel there’s a bit more pressure on us now they are heading into their teen years, but I’m determined not to raise brats as a child from a single mother who worked so hard to give me the best Christmas’s who always told me you do what you can with what you have.

 

[BorisBear]

Post about the “designer baby” fake news!!! Things people do for attention

 

[Homebird44]

I think it depends on the child, if their friends have the latest Iphone, trainers, PlayStation most kids will also want it so they don't feel left out. Having the latest fashion item, gadget has been a thing for years wasn't that why school uniform was introduced?

That's not really life though. I would like lots of things but I can't have them so I get on with it. I had a job at 15 and if I wanted something I had to save for it. My mum was a single parent and didn't have the money. It didn't bother me if I went without, my friends weren't arseholes either so that helped.

 

[Happyvalley]

I also spend about £300 a child (I have 2) and believe it or not they don’t look like they have much with that but what they do have are a few expensive items as they’re older, trainers and a tracksuit is easily £200 of that. I do try and save for it and they’re good kids, they don’t ask me for much all year round so I’m happy to spoil them a bit at Xmas.

Another £150 on parents and siblings, husband and I aren’t buying for each other this year as we’re putting any spends towards a holiday next year.

Probably another £150 on food and plenty of mince pies and baileys!

 

[BettyCrockerr]

This thread got crazy quick, for me I can honestly see why people can an do go into the overdraft an somtimes I don't think it's really the parents fault, my aunt would be in the overdraft every year because the kids obviously wanted what all their friends got, the latest trainers, concert tickets, a phone or tablet, the latest games console etc and it would be feb/March before she was cleared

Before I had my neice I'd be thinking to myself why is she letting them pick such expensive things when she hasn't got it, it's just stupid to do that an they need to be told no, till now when I find myself doing the same thing because my neice now wants certain things that's expensive an kids don't understand the value of money, my neice will pick up a doll that to her is pretty an has all these things but doesn't understand that doll is £50 an it's only going get worse when she starts going to friends an seeing what they have which she will want herself, obviously she will need to learn no but I do get why parents can get into dept, it isn't easy to say no to your kid at Xmas especially if the expensive thing is the only thing they have asked for an £300 these days doesn't go far, hell a games console can be over that on its own now an I doupt any parent here is going to get their kid just ONE thing for Xmas

Sorry for the rant, just feel is isn't fair to really call out people who do get into the overdraft when in this day an age nothing is cheap these days for kids especially when it comes to the tech stuff which all kids want

Kids don’t understand the value of money. Correct. They are children. But PARENTS or ADULT CAREGIVERS are supposed to be responsible and able to correctly manage their finances and budget accordingly. You don’t just blindly dish out money YOU HAVENT GOT for the sheer hell of it just because your kid asks for some overpriced pair of trainers. You want to splash money on your kids - fine. Save money throughout the year - put a bit aside so that when it comes to December you’ve got a pot of money available to spend. No debt, no irresponsible spending.

no wonder so many people are in a financial shambles when the attitude is to just spend whatever it takes and to hell with it - worry about it later.

 

[LittleMy]

I’ve almost finished with my Christmas shopping. My husband and I’ve spent about £400 each on our two children (that’s a main present, some books, an outfit, board/card games, pyjamas and sweets for their stockings).

We spend about £100 each on ourselves, £100-£150 on food, £30 each on our two nieces and £50 each on my parents and his mum. I make up little hampers for our grandparents. We have an agreement with our siblings that we only buy for the children and we’re all happy with that.

We set money aside throughout the year to be able to afford the things we and the children want for Christmas.

 

[Koalabear]

Well that was a wild read! Early on we decided to treat Christmas like an celebration rather than a gift-fest, so with our kids we've always done small presents and instead we will go out on a few days out/maybe few days away somewhere in the UK.

I've worked with teenagers for years and I know peer pressure is hard and everyone says that they all want the newest things, but honestly they don't. Not all of them do. It's just a question of how you raise them. If you raise them to chase the newest iPhones and Air Maxes and what not then that's what they'd expect.

 

[Bellaboonew_12]

I've tried to budget this year, I've bought all my sons presents with my October pay, all my daughters will be bought with November pay and December's will be left for food and any trips out. Fingers crossed that will work.

I've also been trying to pick up an extra item of cupboard or freezable Xmas food shop each time I go shopping.

Some years I've been paying klarna off well into Jan / Feb and put loads on credit cards so I'm hoping this year I've been a bit more sensible.

I started off the year with an asda Xmas savings card (5 a week with my food shop = 250 for a big Dec food shop), but I only remembered to top up for two weeks next year I'm going to try harder with that

 

[JoeBloggs]

Don’t let big Betty swallocks get to you! In my experience people who have such bitter opinions are usually projecting their own insecurities. She’s clearly a troll

Oh bless, not been around here long clearly.

Back to Christmas, we save £50 a month, was £75 but covid and bills! It gives us enough to pay for everything, we only have a small family and this year I refuse to buy his family gifts as they are beyond ungrateful.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Apologies, this may be the wrong thread to post on!!
However, any advise on how much a 4 year old should really get at Christmas?
At the moment I have got my little one around ten smaller gifts and plan on a little stocking for her to open when she wakes up but I can’t help feeling like it’s not enough?!
In the same boat as everybody else with money being really tight this year but feel like I should be doing more.

Can you remember what you got for Xmas at 4? Don't feel pressure to give more. If you got her somethings that you know she'd like then leave it at that.
I know this sounds stupid but for me the best gift was time from my parents. What I remember most is great Xmas with them playing with us

 

[Snippysnips]

This thread got crazy quick, for me I can honestly see why people can an do go into the overdraft an somtimes I don't think it's really the parents fault, my aunt would be in the overdraft every year because the kids obviously wanted what all their friends got, the latest trainers, concert tickets, a phone or tablet, the latest games console etc and it would be feb/March before she was cleared

Before I had my neice I'd be thinking to myself why is she letting them pick such expensive things when she hasn't got it, it's just stupid to do that an they need to be told no, till now when I find myself doing the same thing because my neice now wants certain things that's expensive an kids don't understand the value of money, my neice will pick up a doll that to her is pretty an has all these things but doesn't understand that doll is £50 an it's only going get worse when she starts going to friends an seeing what they have which she will want herself, obviously she will need to learn no but I do get why parents can get into dept, it isn't easy to say no to your kid at Xmas especially if the expensive thing is the only thing they have asked for an £300 these days doesn't go far, hell a games console can be over that on its own now an I doupt any parent here is going to get their kid just ONE thing for Xmas

Sorry for the rant, just feel is isn't fair to really call out people who do get into the overdraft when in this day an age nothing is cheap these days for kids especially when it comes to the tech stuff which all kids want