Bowelbabe #3 What won’t Bowelbabe sell next?

[ordinaryjelly]

Yes, a traumatic event such as bleeding, cardiac arrest with no DNR, anything that involves invasive intervention when the outcome is likely to be poor.

I was resuscitated in 2018. They broke my ribs and I ended up in ICU for almost 7 weeks. Has there been joy and good moments since then? Yes, of course. And I have children so they are a massive protective factor. But right now I lay paralysed in bed with an almost complete c5 injury, I can only type this because of a special swipe keyboard.

I question every single day if that resus was worth it. Every single day. My family have watched my health decline - I'm highly unlikely to die. It is a very small chance, the incident in 2018 was caused by damage to c3. But I will never walk again, I have lost control of my bladder and bowels.

Not to make this all about me, but I am in the process, against my families wishes, of having a DNR put in place. Not because I don't want to be here but because the suffering of me, and those around me, is too much to bear for me now. It may never need to be used and we don't have assisted suicide here so that can never happen. But if it does, I can't survive that ordeal and what comes after it again.

Maybe BB also had a DNR in place, though I feel like if she did we would have heard about it.

I wish her peace.

 

[tarantula59]

I had bowel cancer that had spread to the liver. Treated by same doctor as Bowelbabe in The Royal Marsden. Stage 4 on diagnosis. I had 4 months of chemo; surgery on the bowel; ended up with a severe infection when the internal stitches, where my colon was rejoined, didn't hold; second bowel operation to repair it; a temporary stoma, another 6 months of chemo; a liver resection; a reversal of the stoma; another 6 months of chemo; several radio frequency ablations on my liver and on a suspect shadow on my lung (we never did know what it was, but hey lets blast it to be on the safe side); a serious infection requiring an inpatient stay; a second liver resection; and finally an operation to remove a tumour in my abdomen wall. 7 years of treatment in total. But all of it completed 9 years ago.

I was lucky that my cancer was evidently slow growing ( the tumour in the abdomen wall they believed started to grow post the first surgery when the peritoneal leak occurred and so took 7 years to show up) ; they believed the original colon tumour had been growing for at least 5 years before discovery. So from that perspective I do not have BowelBabe's aggressive gene mutation, and I had none of the horrific issues she has with a tumour growing round a key portal vein and blocking her bile duct. But The Royal Marsden is an amazing place, and they will keep trying where there is hope they can succeed. But they do know when to stop treatment - I was put in touch by Macmillan with a lovely lady who had the exact same story and treatment to be her buddy. She was discharged to a hospice and died within 2 years, while I lived.

The most ill I felt and the most pain I experienced was when I had the infections, not from the cancer, nor the surgery, nor the procedures, nor the chemo. So I really feel for BB. Clearly the doctors are hoping that intravenous antibiotics and building her strength by feeding tube are worth a try. She will be hooked up to the drips for hours of each day, but why, in a break if she feels up to it can she not go out? I did the Butler & Wilson browse and lunch in PJs Grill opposite from my hospital bed. In BB's case, I suspect those kinds of visits are on hold if they made her drains play up.

I agree with everyone that yes, she is clearly very ill at the moment, and I suspect that they are trying to put her back on chemo, alongside all the antibiotics and drains to keep the cancer at bay. But her mum having a glass of wine by her bedside is really neither here nor there. The only way, really, to get on with life with cancer is to pretend it's not there - for me and it seems BB. And Tom Parker, on stage only a couple of weeks before his death.

 

[Freedomofspeech89]

Yeah - in Butler and Wilson, where the average pair of earrings is £300.

See that's the difference between Monique and Deborah. As soon as Monique is better she just wants feel the sun on her face and watch the ducks. As soon as Deborah feels better she's straight down to the nearest pretentious shop on her high street. Each to their own I guess

 

[MegSmeg92]

I think when it comes to end of life care it is hard to know what you would do if you where in her shoes.
Im a stage 4 patient, recieving palliative chemotherapy on the NHS. I know I wont have as many "options" as BB but I had a good chat with my oncologist and we agreed that as long as my quality of life is good we would try everything we possibly can. I know my life will be cut short and I won't kive to see my little girl grow into a beautiful woman but I'll damn make sure I try everything to have quality time with her.
If I had BB's money I honestly think I would keep going if they let me do so.
It is difficult, really difficult.
I agree with what a lot of you are saying, that it doesn't seem like she has any quality of life but I can see why she won't give up.
I think to BB doing her make up, going to harrods etc etc is deemed having a good quality of life as it is something she couldn't do weeks ago however to most of is a good quality of life is spending it with our loved ones!
My point is palliative care is difficult to navigate, it is a difficult position to be in and when you have defied the odds so many times you may naturally want to continue to do that.

 

[vix68]

I’ve been following Deborah for a few months now. At first I was in awe at how amazing and positive she was. I just thought you are an inspiration to us all. On days when I didn’t feel like going to the gym I would listen to her and think for goodness sake if she can go to Pilates every day (whilst dying of cancer) then surely I should be getting off my backside and going to the gym. However, I am seeing a different side to it all now. Please don’t get me wrong, I still feel for her as she is terminally ill but honestly if you take that away she is intolerable. It’s all me me me! Full makeup when she goes in for the procedures. Even when she was walking for the first time with the drip she was wearing her off the shoulder hospital gown number tucked in to her sweaty Betty £80 freebie leggings. Constantly referring to her team of Drs giving her options. The totally inappropriate advertising for high end clothing and beauty products. Doing a period pant advert when at the beginning her sweet daughter said she didn’t want to talk about it. The interview with the doctor on bowel cancer on zoom- she was flipping her hair and actually pouting whilst he was talking. I could go on and on. She is presenting living with cancer from a wealthy, private healthcare perspective and to be honest I find it sickening. She has inadvertently highlighted the massive divide between private and NHS. I have stopped following her.

 

[Ellyjelly]

Saying given her current circumstances it might seem strange showing Hugo’s teeth…..NO! It’s bloody strange that multi millionaires ( house worth we’ll over 2 mil plus husband loaded) are getting free dental care and putting their child out there to advertise it.

 

[MakeDamnSure]

I was 18 when my mum died of cancer. She was diagnosed in July and passed away in September. I will always regret that I didn’t spend enough time with her in her final months. I still had to go to work, I still wanted to see my friends and my boyfriend and in all honesty I didn’t like being around my mum in hospital and at home seeing how frail she was, she barely had the energy to hold a conversation most days. Looking back now I can see how selfish that was and I just didn’t want to face the reality of it all. All I know now is that I’m in my 30’s, I have spent nearly as much of my life without my mum as I did with her, she never saw me buy a house, get married or met my children. Every happy moment in my life is also tinged with sadness. BB’s children may be doing what they have to do to get through it at the moment and that’s up to them but they may regret it later in life like I do. Sorry for such a long ramble!

 

[vix68]

OMG she is now complaining that she is clinically vulnerable and can’t get any covid tests sent to her. WELL STOP GALAVANTING ROUND HARRODS/JEWELLY SHOPS AND THE POLLUTION RIDDEN AMBULANCE BAY THEN!!! The hospital staff must be really fed up with her entitled attitude.

 

[ginnyw]

Monique has touched and united everybody on here. No mean feat. She's a lovely, warm and generous soul.

 

[maytoseptember]

It’s so deeply, pathologically weird that they chose the top right photo to “model” a skirt. Deborah, attached to drains and tubes, distended belly, hoiks up her hospital gown to reveal a knitted mini and compression stockings. I mean… why?

 

[Warrior]

Reading her comments on mental health being as important as physical I have to agree with her, however, tagging the NHS constantly whilst sitting in her private room and outside the private Marsden wing seems a bit rich! and Certainly appears as though she’s receiving NHS care only. Im sure there are lots of people who assume its the basic Marsden care. Looking at Monique( and others) her current hospital stay they could not be further apart.

100% this. Stop tagging the NHS. If anything tag Bupa or whatever it is.

Imagine what Debs’ mental health would be like if she was in a ward with other people, their noise, their visitors when you want to sleep. No access to the tv show you want to watch. imagine being as uncomfortable as Monique and being readmitted to a ward without privacy. Imagine just leaving your bed when the dr is coming and leaving a note for him/her to traipse around the hospital to find you. Do we think a NHS doctor would have the time to do that!. imagine when you are not there and miss the lunch service and therefore lunch. Imagine crying all day and everyone staring or worse wanting to cry but holding it in because of respect for other people or lying all day with your curtain pulled because you want to cry in peace. All of this whilst dealing with the knowledge that the NHS will doing nothing further to treat you.

Deborah has zero experience of any of this which is an everyday reality for others with stage 4 cancer. IMO it is Monique who shows real mental strength.

And now she’s flogging make up again. She wouldn’t be doing her make up if she had interested observers in the beds opposite…

 

[LittleMissRuby]

I think im actually going to have to unfollow her now. It doesn't feel right to watch someone die on social media. Because sorry to be blunt, that's what we are doing now. The fact that she still has an external ascites drain in situ speaks volumes, she isnt getting 'better' in any sense of the word. She isn't bouncing back. This, sadly, is a lady slowly dying in complete denial. She may irritate the life out of me, but now it's become tragic.

 

[BettyCrockerr]

I think the companies that are still using Deborah are abhorrent. The woman is literally dying, and they are using her fragile condition to boost sales. Fetishisation of her illness used as a USP, it’s disgusting

 

[Ellyjelly]

Fuck me, no. So Ill, drains literally hanging out of her and flogging stuff. Deny everything, throw everything at your illness, but please, step away from selling. It’s so grotesque. There is something that makes my heart hurt, a woman in her early forties with a terminal illness, selling anti ageing products! There surely comes a time when you need to just rest and step away for a while. This is not about ‘ploughing’ on for her mental health, this is about money.

 

[Hangoninthere]

The personality of Monique shines through. What a wonderful human being she is. I hope that she gets some comfort being home with her loved ones and finds some peace and joy in the time she has left.

I have no idea how she is so grateful and hope I am able to be so when my time comes. Truely upsetting that such a young woman has been through so much. Power to you Monique!

 

[Jvuddie]

But she does post information about signs of bowel cancer etc. and has raised a lot of awareness.

It seems people are holding her to an unfair standard? Because she built her platform around having cancer and spreading awareness of it, she’s scrutinised more heavily than other influencers when she uses that platform to promote products.
I don’t like ‘influencers’ pushing products, especially those that have a young audience. I also don’t like BB selling products, but not because she has cancer, because I don’t like influencers doing that.

This is just going round in circles. If you don't think it's weird as f to be doing adverts from your hospital bed while terminally ill - good for you. Personally I think that's odd, but I am not here to police people's thoughts.

The people who do think it's strange are trying to have a, non offensive, discussion about it. If you're finding this uncomfortable why not move to another thread or comment on something else instead of constantly trying to derail our conversation. What are you hoping to achieve? We aren't going to change our minds or stop talking about something because a couple of people don't agree. Isn't this ability to all share our opinions fairly and truly literally the point of this site?

I'd absolutely understand if this thread was spitting venom about Bowel Babe, but it isn't, and I haven't really been (did call her a dick once, which wasn't my finest hour tbf, I am a grumpy dying cancer patient, but I have tried to avoid getting personal since) we are just questioning a grown woman's decisions (fairly innocuous decisions in the grand scheme of things too).

We're allowed to question people, cancer or not.

 

[Lovely]

£500 Birkenstocks

I'm a lesbian, so Birkenstocks are The Shoe Of My People and even I'm like HELL NO.

 

[jackolantern]

I'm heartbroken for Monique, life is so fucking unfair. I know it isn't Deborah's fault and ultimately the end result will be the same for them both, but to see how Monique is being treated and denied basic levels of human decency and comfort, while princess pea is swanning around in her private suite with £500 shoes does my fucking nut in. She's just a tone deaf twat, can't escape it, however sad her situation may be.

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Just a thought but I remember jade goody on an interview before she passed away saying she was going to sell everything, do anything and make her tv show to make as much money as possible to give to her boys after she'd gone! Could this be what she is doing? If it is then I think I'd do the same!

Jade Goody grew up in abject poverty and wanted her kids to have money after her death so avoid them ever having to live the childhood she had. Deborah is already extremely well off, he husband is minted and they already have a wealthy lifestyle. She has no need to be doing what she’s doing now. She does it because she loves the attention.

 

[Brummiebird]

Imagine being proud of having your arse in the newspaper that hacked a dead schoolgirl’s phone.