Am I a nasty person?

[GiggleBee]

Being cooped up in the house has given me so much anxiety and im now even anxious about if Im a nice or nasty person?

All started after an argument with a friend yesterday. She was goading me, and has been for weeks over a subject and I snapped and told her exactly what I thought. I just feel like I shouldnt of done that.

My head is in such a mess right now

 

[Jelly Bean]

Being cooped up in the house has given me so much anxiety and im now even anxious about if Im a nice or nasty person?

All started after an argument with a friend yesterday. She was goading me, and has been for weeks over a subject and I snapped and told her exactly what I thought. I just feel like I shouldnt of done that.

My head is in such a mess right now

These are very strange times.
I read an article where it said a lot of people are going through a grieving process. Grieving for a life that seems quite remote now. Odd feelings cropping up. I had a panic attack (which I haven't had for years) on Monday after Boris' lock down speech. The sense of walls closing in, options being closed, freedoms stopped.
Don't judge yourself on the present circumstances.
I can't advise how you proceed with your friend - but the fact you are questioning how you spoke obviously means you aren't a nasty person. Nasty people don't care.

 

[Danielle1]

100% what @Jelly Bean said! Couldn't put it any better myself but just wanted to be another person telling you that I'm sure your not a nasty person these are stressful times. I've had a friend snap at me on the phone earlier over something silly which is unlike her and understood it was due to stress. It's a difficult time and I don't know the situation with your friend obviously but if she's goading you over something that isn't particularly kind either, sometimes us quite senstitive people feel guilty even although we are completely justifed to stick up for ourselves. So if it was a situation like that don't beat yourself up either xx

 

[Bec3007]

I think the fact you have to ask if you’re nasty or nice tells me that you’re not nasty at all. I’ve been so anxious recently, more so after lock down and it’s affecting my mood so much. There’s nothing wrong with telling someone your opinion or how you feel x

 

[Oohthedrama]

Hard to know without details of the argument or what you said tbh,

you might have been nasty if that one argument has made you doubt yourself and made you feel guilty?
no idea what you said to her

Maybe you were nasty, doesn’t mean you’re a nasty person overall.

 

[GiggleBee]

Hard to know without details of the argument or what you said tbh,

you might have been nasty if that one argument has made you doubt yourself and made you feel guilty?
no idea what you said to her

Maybe you were nasty, doesn’t mean you’re a nasty person overall.

Basically all over a b12 injection. She gets hers every 10 weeks but still functions like a normal human and Im made to wait every 12 weeks and by week 8 im practically dead, sleeping all the time and in so much pain ect.
She has to tell me everytime when hers is and how shes allowed it sooner because shes 'so poorly' and yesterday she said 'Oh, it seems Im getting it every 8 weeks now' so I flipped and told her she wasnt ill enough to deserve it every i weeks.

 

[Tree_]

I wouldn't say nasty at all, however it's not really your place to say whether your friend is deserving of the treatment on a more regular basis. But you need to speak to your doctor as it can't be good for you to be so ill by week 8. In saying all that your friend seems a bit of a boaster x

 

[Oohthedrama]

Are you ok with me being completely honest with you.

you have a chronic illness right, and I assume your friend does as well, sometimes that can get quite competitive, it’s similar with mental health issues, there is a really fucked up competition to be seen as the worst

clearly your friend wants to be seen as very unwell, there is no other reason why she’d even be bringing this up so much if that wasn’t the case.

what you said to her was nasty. It was, you both suffer from illnesses, but It’s not your call to decide when she deserves a b12 injection, it’s not your call to tell her she doesn’t deserve treatment.

you were wrong and you probably know that or you wouldn’t be upset about what you said.

i don’t think you’re a bad person at all but I think you should avoid conversations that trigger you and upset you because you know you’ll react, and then feel bad about how you reacted.

 

[GiggleBee]

Are you ok with me being completely honest with you.

you have a chronic illness right, and I assume your friend does as well, sometimes that can get quite competitive, it’s similar with mental health issues, there is a really fucked up competition to be seen as the worst

clearly your friend wants to be seen as very unwell, there is no other reason why she’d even be bringing this up so much if that wasn’t the case.

what you said to her was nasty. It was, you both suffer from illnesses, but It’s not your call to decide when she deserves a b12 injection, it’s not your call to tell her she doesn’t deserve treatment.

you were wrong and you probably know that or you wouldn’t be upset about what you said.

i don’t think you’re a bad person at all but I think you should avoid conversations that trigger you and upset you because you know you’ll react, and then feel bad about how you reacted.

Thank you for being honest. My friend doesnt have any chronic illesses but seems to thrive on having something wrong with her.
I wont be speaking to her about any health related issues anymore.

 

[DevaVictrix]

All in all, in the grand scheme of this mad life atm, this was just a snap argument, that will blow over and you’ll be fine. People are tired and irritable and anxious at the minute, you’ll be grand. Friend does sound too irritating for me though.

 

[GiggleBee]

I wouldn't say nasty at all, however it's not really your place to say whether your friend is deserving of the treatment on a more regular basis. But you need to speak to your doctor as it can't be good for you to be so ill by week 8. In saying all that your friend seems a bit of a boaster x

Ive spoken to my doctor and was just told to up my vitamins

 

[Bashandcrash]

I think everyone is losing it slightly at the moment, but it is not your place to say what medication your friend needs, that is between her and her medical team. Please try to take a step back from discussing B12 and illness with your friend as it sounds like you are harbouring quite a bit of resentment.

 

[Apple In My Pie]

It was nasty but also a bit petty, if it was me I’d cool the friendship off for a bit but it’s not worth cutting ties altogether iyswim? I don’t think it makes you a nasty person though.

 

[Chablis1]

All in all, in the grand scheme of this mad life atm, this was just a snap argument, that will blow over and you’ll be fine. People are tired and irritable and anxious at the minute, you’ll be grand. Friend does sound too irritating for me though.

I thought that about your friend - would be so irritating to deal with on a regular basis.

 

[PoleStar]

No I don't think you're nasty at all. Everyone is under pressure at the moment of a type that I doubt any of us have experienced before. In these circumstances anything that might usually just be an annoyance can be magnified and feel much bigger and a lot more irritating than normal so I'm not surprised you snapped. Quite honestly your friend sounds bloody annoying and self-satisfied!

 

[GiggleBee]

I think everyone is losing it slightly at the moment, but it is not your place to say what medication your friend needs, that is between her and her medical team. Please try to take a step back from discussing B12 and illness with your friend as it sounds like you are harbouring quite a bit of resentment.

I do take a step back but she enjoys rubbing it in and bringing it up.