I’m genuinely in a place where it doesn’t bother me anymore. I know many people say that, but I’ve had a lot of help, a lot of reflection and support. My actions weren’t perfect and were led by trauma responses that I’m not proud of. But my actions have been emphasised and exploited. I was in a very dark place trying to fight for myself and being constantly triggered by a power struggle which I didn’t deal with in the best way. However I always maintain that I made no threats, no personal info comments and only told the truth and documented online my feelings I was so overwhelmed by other people contacting me saying they’d experienced the same, I got extremely overwhelmed. I will openly and always say I didn’t always handle things in the best way, but now after seeking support I have the tools to manage this so much better and also to not give my power away. I’ve also had amazing support from a stalking charity who put to the police I had been groomed, and they’ve supported me through that realisation too and my reactions when she exploited my story.
She can’t ever never get what she truly wants or feels she’s needs from me.
I think further exploitation of the situation a books whatever now shows so much more about her than anything else. She thinks it will hurt me, but honestly it will prove my position even more,
She’s exposed herself now in many ways and she’s just wanting someone now as a scapegoat or to blame, that seems to be me
So many people now can see through her perceived image and presence.
I know I sound like her when I say this, but I genuinely have so many messages, my solicitor got so many statements from actual psychologists, stalking charity CEO’s, researchers, academics etc. who saw what was going on and raised safeguarding concerns about me and wrote in support of me.
There’s also been amazing groups of women/men who have spent so much time time supporting me and sticking up for me. I was absolutely shocked that people who didn’t even know me took time out to support me and to stick up for ethics.
Writing on here now is genuinely the most time I’ve spent on this in ages. What happened hasn’t affected my ability to volunteer, work or keep doing activist work.
My energy has gone into recognising my trauma response and my triggers to injustice and power imbalances.
I take SO much away from this situation, I take so much love and courage that i was supported so much. It’s still extremely heartwarming. I don’t need ‘justice’ anymore because I’m getting it by seeing her just continuously exposing herself now even more. Shes in a small part of the internet shouting and lying, she chooses to use that energy, leave them too it,
Time is amazing and it can heal and also expose.
It will happen again to someone else, and it will keep happening over and over unfortunately.
I don’t want to spend anymore time on this, but again thank you so much for all the support