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Jeeves

VIP Member
Not sure if this will work.
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Mods - new thread reported. Can you edit title to remove text in brackets please?
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Thank you Mods!
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Not up to Comtesse's usual standard but perhaps someone else can pick up the slack on this one. Nanny duties have first dibs this morning!
 
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T Rex

VIP Member
Any takers out there? You must meet these requirements though!
"Hey guys! I am looking for some extra help for our Patreon Days this year! You will be working alongside me to prepare lunch for 3 days!"
That's cute- FRK is looking for her own slave. Also a bonus if you are from the US and bring her the aprons she is trying to evade duty on. Where would the slave volunteer stay? In the room with the missing keystone? On a the massage table in the "Not So Grand Salon" construction site? On an inflatable bed in FRK's room?

- You must have experience with making lunch for 30-50 people
Anyone who has ever hosted a BBQ, baby shower, children's birthday party. Face painting and balloon animal making skills are a plus!

- A basic understanding of food safety in a kitchen environment
What is the point when food gets left out for hours, meals are made on the listeria table, dogs in the kitchen, no one wears gloves nor hair nets, and people just put their grubby hands into whatever is being made (Fanny) to "sample"?

- Experience working in a restaurant kitchen, catering/cafe kitchen
Kind of a moot point, as the LaLande kitchen is none of those things!

Nope. That is a hard pass from me.
 
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graciemckitten

VIP Member
Come to the holiday from hygiene Dump where you will enjoy
  • Prison ration meals on lead laden plates
  • drinking cheap boxed wine in leaden crystal
  • being charged for a 3 star meal at a 5 star price
  • the tension of unlocked guest rooms
  • the one room on the ground floor of the Dump to fraternize under the stern gaze of Ñutty , who wil eavesdrop on your conversations, go thru your camera and delete any videos or photos of which she does not approve ( what a bonding experience among the guests).
  • Ratso romancing your legs and “helping” to prepare your dinner
  • Watching Steohanie fake gush over the mandatory $ 250 minimum gift to Fanny to be granted access to the Dump.
  • playing the “who peed on the floor” game
  • taking photos in front of the orange fence to memorialize your stay
  • eating dinner with Stephanie for 15 minutes out of the scheduled three hours for dinner, as she rushes back and forth to film Marie.
  • listening to Phillip detail his daily three hour routine he endures daily, in order to create the impression that he is not going bald
  • playing a unique party game called, Who am I?, involving a person with a bag on their head doing charades to act out a Greek mythology character named after one of the deceased animals at the Dump.
  • tepid water for your bathing and showering while toweling off with a slightly rank, old towel emblazon with a lopsided embroidered peacock
  • Being awakened at night by the door of your room, opening and closing…… Stephanie will claim it was Henri, but we know it was really tipsy Phillip, how cute!
  • Paying the extra €50 for the Stefanie send off. When you check out of the dump at noon, Stephanie will force herself out of her bed in her pajamas, and waved to you from the kitchen window as she is preparing herself a cup of tea and getting ready to start her day. Priceless memories.
 
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Miss Trunchbull

VIP Member
Fanny clearly is taking notes from here…..saying she’d travelled too much, must panel the salon….has a dirty kitchen, yet still has not addressed the fact that she is engaged to this……even the tulips have lost the will to live. And wtf is going on on the top of his head. Looks like area 51….
A086F98A-B050-4E73-8F6B-06E1B74AD0CB.jpeg
 
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Hedda Hopper

VIP Member
I'm picturing my arrival at the dump as a guest and this is my welcome:
  • An orange plastic fence.
  • A large mysterious dent in the lawn.
  • Storage units, always a welcoming site.
  • Scaffolding on the chapel.
  • Workers vehicles.
  • Weed choked gardens.
  • Rooms that are off limits due to structural problems.
  • Inconsistent and often mysterious food.
  • An unleashed hyper little dog (I don't trust most dogs)
  • A room with peeling wallpaper and mismatched everything.
  • No way to get a decent cup of coffee.
  • Boxed wine served in decanters containing lead.
I want my money back!
 
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M&MsMom

VIP Member
I don't really know who here is the creator of that Lancelot Instagram, which is hilarious, by the way.
But did you notice who's following? None other than Baby (a.k.a. fake spawn of Tess)

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graciemckitten

VIP Member
Mummy Isabelle is in on the grift and lies a lot. if Fanny took a test, she would have immediately blabbed about it. The entire throuple would have been tested. It did not happen because Stephanie was obviously faking illness to cover up a week of traveling again and was not sick. As usual, Mummy was lying to do damage control. Mummy lied about Percy’s TB and about Percy’s doctors in the UK. Stephanie lied about Percy’s TB, and the immunization status of the Dump crew and never contacted previous B&B guests to let them know that they had been exposed to a person with a TB infection while they were guests at the dump and never alerted the local authorities to let them know that a person with a long-standing TB infection has been living at the dump. Mummy lies routinely. She and daughter are inherently greedy and untrustworthy. ALWAYS,
 
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ComtesseRose

VIP Member
@Jeeves Thank you for stepping in. @KyBourbon thank you for the recap.
Thank you all who tried and make a new thread. I find it odd that it doesn't work for you. I will say, I make the threads from my laptop on Windows.
Congratulations @Hedda Hopper our newest VIP, thank you for approving the title.
Congratulations @Lady Avonlea for naming it, and @Tartuffe for nominating it.
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On to Fanny...
LOL, does she think a YouTube short is going to help her algorithm, 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
Romanticising colonisation of India, when Mmakhotso Moloi has passed away. :sick:
Remember Fanny, when the filter is shut off you look like this, and no amount of money or privilege can stop that face from aging.
Curly Fanny.png
 
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Pencil Pine Principessa

Well-known member
Screenshot 2024-04-24 at 9.01.58 PM.png


Here she is again, ladies and gentlemen...reporting live from bed, making sure to show some skin for the Seniors Only Fans patrons...

Loathsome lizard
 
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KyBourbon

VIP Member
I am increasingly convinced that I must lead a very sheltered life as I am quite certain that I have NEVER encountered a man wearing a pearl dress ring.
If you didn't know otherwise, I am certain that most people would identify these hands as belonging to a girl/woman.
@Jeeves I’m gay and I’ve never seen a man…gay, straight, or bi…wear a pearl dress ring. Maybe a drag queen would wear one…although I’ve never seen that, either. On the one hand, I admire someone like Harry Styles who doesn’t conform to traditional norms and wears whatever clothing he feels comfortable or likes. But Snorts isn’t Harry Styles, and he just looks creepy and cringe…he can’t pull it off. Snorts…please stop!
 
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Jules100

VIP Member
With all those out buildings????? She is renting storage containers??? And has.to talk about it???? We would never know if she didnt.blab everything. Taking bets now... How many years will those containers be there???
The storage containers should now be referred to as the annex. Expensive, grungy and ugly, just like the rest of Lalande.
 
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Abuela

Chatty Member
In tonight's vlog,wow, the elusive Nick was so elusive he never appeared as promised by Fanny. At the French charity do it was not lost on me to see the irony of Fanny flying to London to hear a Frenchman celebrate architectural heritage and French tradesmen when she seems to only use non locals.
 
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KyBourbon

VIP Member
Didn’t Stephanie put the chapel furnishings into a couple of containers also?
How many rental containers does now have at the dump?


Is every single room with a dump in the outbuildings all filled up with crap? There isn’t enough room to put several pieces of furniture? Wilder, gruesome twosome constantly buying more and more and more and more and more furniture in crap for the dump if it is too full to even accommodate shifting furniture from one room?

Has Stephanie procured even more storage units in London or could they become so stuffed full of crap that she is having to move items into storage containers at the dump?
Ahhhh, yes! La La Land is finally complete!

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KyBourbon

VIP Member
Most liked posts from previous threads.
Thanks @Jeeves ! And thanks @ComtesseRose for all you do! ❤


Jules100
VIP Member

Friday at 10:17 AM
Speaking of Daddy’s masterpieces hung all over the chateau… I finally got a dog portrait for my 4th pup, Hobie (Ho-bee). I guess after 3.5 years, he finally earned a spot on the wall. Kidding, he’s a wonderful pup and the best thing to come out of 2020. I just need to get my husband to hang it up with the others. (Yes I know these are a bit much, but they make me smile and I love them.)

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graciemckitten
VIP Member

Thursday at 1:57 PM
It is all about the money, honey, with disingenuous scammer and grifter Stephanie Jarvis: MULTIPLE LUXURY VACATIONS FOR EVERYONE!Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!

GUESSTIMATES FOR 2024 INCOME (SPOILER ALERT:GROSS ESTIMATED 2024 TOTAL (including December, 2023 grift a start money included) WILL BE AROUND $1,099,209,209.65)

B AND B MONEY FOR 2024

Stephanie can rent out 5 rooms at a time as a B and B. Here are the rooms she rents out weekly during the B and B season. They are normally rented out for 3 nights each week. I believe the 75 euro dinners are on Friday and Saturday nights.

I checked their reservations. According to their site(which means little since Fanny blocks out weeks, etc. to appear full.) They are over 98% rented out for the upcoming B and B season.

With that in mind, there are 28 weeks in the B and B season ( I subtracted 1 week for the Patreon extravaganza).

Here are the rooms, capacity, and rates for a 3 day stay:
1. Chambre de Roger 1 person, 1 twin bed 680 euros ($724.44)
2. Bonne Mamman , 2 people, 1 king bed 780 euros ($830.97)
3. Chambre de la tour 2 people, double bed? 780 euros ($830.97)
4. Chambre Rose 2 people, 780 euros($830.97)
5. Marquis Suite, 2 people 1005 euros ($1070.68)

Adding all of these figures, result in 4,025 euros per week for the rental of the 5 rooms.
4,025 x 4 weeks in a month= 16,100 euros ($17,152.14) per month for room rentals only.

Technically, there are only spaces for 9 people to spend the night but I will add 1 person so there are 10 people per Friday and Saturday night dinner (since Stephanie goes on and on about 10 guests for dinner). 75 euros is $79.90

10 x 75 euros = 750 euros ($799.01) for Friday night dinner. If dinner and cheap wine costs $200 there is $600 profit per dinner.

10 x 75 euros = 750 (799.01) euros for Saturday night dinner

Total 1500 euros ($1598.03) per weekend for Friday/Saturday night dinners

Every week, 4025 euros ($5886.05) for room rental + 1500 euros ($1598.03) for Friday/Saturday night dinners= 5,525 euros ($5886.05) weekly for the B and B.

5,525 euros ($5886.05) per week (3 nightly stays in 5 rooms + Friday/Saturday night dinners) x 28 weeks in the B and B season = 154,700 euros ($164,809.65) for the 2024 B and B season.

154,700 euros ($164,809.65)
for the 2024 B and B season.

What does she subtract from this amount? Insurance, wages of Nutty/ FRK/cost of food/ cleaning service/ does she subtracts any of the fees paid to the 3 gardeners?/ does Snorty get paid from this amount?

Note that Fanny usually received about $250 minimum in gifts from B and B guests weekly.
$250 x 28 weeks = $7,000 minimum in tax free gifts to the Shittelaine (likely much more).

WHAT OTHER MONEY DOES STEPHANIE RECEIVE IN 2024 AND FROM WHAT SOURCES?

Let’s assume she receives an average of $32,000 monthly in tax free Patreon monies. 12 x $32,000= $384,400 for 2024

WHAT OTHER TAX FREE MONEY HAS SHE RECEIVED SINCE DECEMBER, 2023 AND WILL LIKELY RECEIVE THROUGH 2024 FROM THE GRIFT A STAR SCAM?

She had received $250,000 in grift a start money by mid January 2024. She had approximately
$67,000 in remaining stars to grift at that time. Let’s assume she sells the right to name the remaining stars this year, so she is at $317,000 in grifted tax free star money. Once she finishes construction and repainting of stars in 2 sections of the chapel, and presumably sells those stars, she would have received aroun $400,000+ in tax free funds, funneled to her personally, to put in the non profit association.

HOW MUCH WILL SHE MAKE OFF OF YOUTUBE FOR CD VIDEOS, GRIFT GRAB REPEAT VIEWS(AND INCLUDING THE DECEMBER, 2023 MONIES WHICH SHE DID NOT DONATE TO CHARITY), AND REPEAT/NEW VIEWS OF CD VIDEOS and associated ad revenue?


I cannot recall the exact amount as I type this, so I will go with $150,000 per year. She has over 400 CD videos, and over a 100 grift grab videos, travel videos, etc. Someone correct me on this, if I am way off on this figure. Everyone seems to forget that she gets a lot of repeat, new views on old videos which lines her pockets. This money would presumably be taxable income.

Fanny has also received funds from the sale of lumber from the 50+ acres of woods on the Dump property and will continue to do so for the next several years. Presumably, Nic and Cameron are paid from these proceeds, money or wood.

SO, HOW MUCH MONEY DOES GREEDY 10 EURO DRESS EBEGGER LITTLE ORPHAN PRINCESS STEPHANIE JARVIS HAVE COMING IN FOR 2024? GUESSTIMATES BELOW:

NON TAXABLE MONIES
NON TAXABLE MONEY/FUNDS: PATREON $384,400
GRIFT A STAR $400,000+
TOTAL: $784,400


TAXABLE INCOME: B AND B: 154,700 euros $164,809.65
YOUTUBE $150,0000 (it may be more than this amount)

TOTAL $314,809.65


GROSS TOTAL RECEIVED $1,099,209,209.65


Fanny and Isabelle specifically said in a video that they set the association up to avoid French taxation.
WHAT DOES SHE SUBTRACT FROM THE TAXABLE INCOME?
Snorty salary as Miss Chatelaine?
Nutty Salary?
FRK Salary?
Gardeners salary?
Salary for herself?
Food, insurance, cleaning services, new towels, decorations, etc.

WHERE ARE NON PROFIT ASSOCIATIONS FUNDS SPENT?
STEPHANIE PAYS HERSELF A SALARY FROM PATREON, MUMMY, AND NUTTY ALSO GET COMPENSATED FOR BEING OFFICERS. HOW MUCH DO THEY EACH GET OUT OF THE TAX FREE FUNDS?

When she altered the Nonprofit Association purpose, after signing up thousands of dollars in months Patreon pledges, she changed the purpose to the following:

Reminder of how Štephanfraudie Jarvis originally lured in Patrons:

Original Patreon page:
Become a sponsor of the registered non-profit Chateau de Lalande Association, which is dedicated to restoring and renovating the chateau! Your support will be used to bring a beautiful 16th century French chateau back to life :) A limited edition photo of Lalande with a signed note to welcome you!

Stephanfraudie’s “ official” backhanded, sneaky real purpose of of the Association revealed only AFTER signing up the majority of the Patrons:

Purpose of the association: Realization of activities, exhibitions, events and cultural events, in the broad sense of the terms, in order to collect funds to achieve the purposes for which the association is created and all acts relating directly or indirectly to its social object; Accompaniment and development of the Château de Lalande, promotion of the Château by any means and support, promotion and enhancement of the local heritage in order to promote the attractiveness of the territory; Restoration and safeguarding of the Castle and in general, enhancement of the cultural and architectural heritage of the Château; Participate, directly or indirectly, in all activities, as long as they can be linked, directly or indirectly, to the object of the association.



What is she deducting? Clothing, shopping, Ratso, trips, auctions, decoration, Amaury salaries, Snorty salary, luxury travel, etc.

REMEMBER STEPHANIE RECEIVED TAX BENEFITS FOR 2023 FOR AMOUNTS GIVEN TO CHARITY BY THE GRIFT GRAB.


REMEMBER THAT STEPHANIE GETS THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN GRIFTED CLOTHING AND APPLIANCES FROM CD SPONSORS AS WELL AS THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN UNSEEN AND UNDECLARED GIFTS EACH YEAR.

She also gets money from lumber harvested and sold.

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link to previous post on the Non profit
The Chateau Diaries #163 Stephanie Jarvis the Złoty Spinster, Village Pump and Town Bike.
In the last 12 patron videos Fanny & Snorty painted their noses & nails, Amuary & Oncle Steve watered the garden, and Ian the plaster found a live wire. There is zero, zilch, nothing, sweet Fanny Adams happening at the shiteau except lots of talk and even more spending. - Davy - plans for the...
tattle.life

Last edited: Thursday at 2:17 PM
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[IMG alt="TorontoGWM"]https://media3.tattle.life/data/avatars/m/350/350145.jpg?1709489500[/IMG]
TorontoGWM
VIP Member

Saturday at 9:46 PM
If Friday’s vlog content was from last weekend, how could she not have a Patreon vlog ready in a week’s time?????? She is such a liar and bullsh*tter.
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Last edited: Saturday at 9:51 PM
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[IMG alt="Just Grift Wood"]https://media3.tattle.life/data/avatars/m/346/346023.jpg?1657896136[/IMG]
Just Grift Wood
VIP Member

Thursday at 11:46 AM
Thanks @ComtesseRose I am ranting again but she makes me so hopping mad

She is soooooooo lazy she can't even dig two bloody holes for the new Jasmine and get them planted. When I get new plants I can't wait to get them in. She doesn't care if they die again someone else is paying

Why don't patreons realise that no Chambre d'hote owner letting 5 rooms for 3 nights a week, employs a full time Chef ,they cook themselves- it simply wouldn't be viable in a normal house let alone a Chateau. Fanny putting on graces like she is to the Manor Born, she really should be ashamed of herself she is the most entitled lazy woman I have ever seen-I mean that sincerely.

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[IMG alt="KiKiGee"]https://media3.tattle.life/data/avatars/m/216/216710.jpg?1618091404[/IMG]
KiKiGee
VIP Member

Thursday at 1:30 PM
jacquelyn corbin
2 hours ago
Maybe Philip could learn to mow?

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