The Chateau Diaries - Stephanie Jarvis

[PeacockQueen]

The clothes/body shaming of Stephanie is grotesque. A woman is free to wear whatever she wants, whenever she wants, especially in her own home, without being fearful that men are objectifying her sexually (if they are that's on them, not her) and without other women casting judgement as to her motives and projecting their own insecurities (if other women perceive it as "too sexual" that's on them, not her).

The misogyny is palpable - however the fact that Stephanie has maintained good friendships with male friends, ex boyfriends, their partners and children for years and that they all very clearly feel happy and comfortable together at Lalande and on holidays together perfectly demonstrates that their position fortunately, is the polar opposite - they clearly don't view Stephanie has a man-eating, marriage wrecking, sex obsessed "threat" just because they see her in her pyjamas.

It's laughable to suggest that she shouldn't dress how she wants when there are "attached men" around - in case they do what? Lose control of themselves? If any man cannot control their sexual urges around women and the mere sight of a little bare flesh is enough to be unfaithful, or worse, then they have far, far far bigger problems than Stephanie's outfits.

Women are not responsible for men's actions.

 

[ChocLili]

Possibly. It certainly won't look very 17e century style for sure.

Just paint it to look like a giant Spode plate - stylish!


This!

 

[soll]

I think most of us are here as fans, just not super wally hyper fans. The vlogs have brought me great pleasure and I really hope the special magic doesn't get tarnished. For me this site is just a bit of extra fun, and I read some valid criticism but definitely no hate.

 

[frenchessence]

Really agree with everything y’all saying. SJ said editing takes about 8 hours per video ... she must be under such a stain to keep churning it all out, to get it uploaded, then to gather everyone around for the dreaded Pass-the-Parcel (eye roll), even good natured Selmar (a gentle soul!) looks so uncomfortable at having to vocalise appreciation for yet another dog-chew, & I’m sure Marie prefers to be chopping up cheese rather than sitting next to Hani for an hour.
Someone (maybe the gorgeous-not-put-a-foot-wrong-so-far Nati) should advise Stephanie to set some boundaries - and start to produce quality (as earlier) not quantity. Her old videos were so charming ... and there was something genuine & unforced about her friendship with Michael . I felt a little sorry for him back then. ... he always looked rather gauche & uncomfortable - a bit of an outsider amongst SJ’s other more glamorous, worldly extrovert friends. He showed such a sensitive side to his character with his composing & piano playing - and art ... he’s a very good illustrator. - but I have never been able to watch a whole episode of DIO. I can see that he & Stephanie were enchanted with each other - just as friends. I notice there’s not been any more mention of her chateau road trip channel with MP ... her new art/food/travel channel with the divine Oliver seems to have taken its place maybe? Those two are fabulous together - they could be the new Kirstie & Phil (location location location) though I’m not sure his beautiful wife Camilla would like that ! But for heavens sake, how much more can Stephanie possibly take on ? How she sustains that energy level & positivity is incredible.
Let’s face it, Stephanie is a one-off. A golden girl. She is still the Queen of Chateau blogging imo, Those hangers on - no matter how pleasant, wouldn’t have got anywhere without the connection to her. They obviously benefit from her but I fear ultimately, her association with them, if continual, may dilute her own vlogs. She is her own magic & a supporting cast of volunteers, Isobel, old friends, builders/restorers is more entertaining than some new kids on the block tripping over themselves to vlog at Lalande. No matter how ‘chirpy’ and ‘cheeky’ they are.

Btw stephanie should get a commission from Zara every time she wears that yellow floral dress . I’ve never been into floral clothing but she looks so lovely in it I found myself trawling through EBay looking for one ... now that IS crazy. Thankfully there were none online - I’d never have done it justice

 

[C’est la vie]

Hello all! Finally found likeminded people! I’ve watched the videos from the word go, when they were filmed in portrait and were a lot less ‘produced’ and I’ve really enjoyed them. Recently I’m getting more and more uncomfortable watching. Other half doesn’t get my ramblings as he just tells me not to watch CDs.... Just so I can offload a little can I say..
- I find the present openings vulgar and greedy (Yet I still watch for the cringe factor). Gifts from companies such as Onehundredstars, Spode and all the smaller businesses are not ‘gifts’. It is free advertising.
- I cant watch the live question and answers anymore as the constant demands from fans for thanks when a donation of money has been missed is unbelievable. I also hate the hints for money especially from Michael Petherick-eg when he wanted a new laptop and him and Stephanie went on and on about his editing until a fan set up a fund for a laptop. Unbelievable. It’s blatant begging.
-The superfans really worry me. There are a couple that answer all the questions in the comments and to have that amount of knowledge about people that you don’t know is concerning. One of them lives on the other side of the world! I am surprised Isabelle hasn’t put her foot down about a lot of the recent goings on. She seems a no nonsense kind of character, not to be messed with.
-The comments about Percy needing to be at Lalande is sad. Have these people not listened to his breathing/speaking? He clearly has a lung issue and therefore moving away from the safety of where he is to a chateau where all and sundry rock up bemuses me. I wouldn’t want to be separated from my other half for this long but it’s Isabelle that should travel if and when, not Percy.
Reading all your comments is refreshing as I noticed a long time ago that anything not remotely fauning was being removed from the comments on the videos.

 

[Takeaway]

could do to lose the gift unwrapping as it has become very uncomfortable to watch and just return to the original Sundays at the chateau and a less contrived vlog during the week.
I would welcome further videos with Oliver as I have loved their chemistry presenting together and the interesting topics. Heres to continued viewing and discussion with like minded people.
ps.... I’m not in my twenties either

@Tinkertina welcome & totally agree, the gift giving is so tacky & last weeks being a great example with Selmar having to appreciate a badly embroidered scarf & the same hats from Brenda for Selmar, Michael & Ryan that she gave to David in a previous episode. Let’s hope Stephanie drops the Chateau Unwrapped very soon. And she needs to make it clear the fan sites on Facebook that have caused so much grief this week are nothing to do with Lalande & keep to her wonderful format of doing videos on restoration, art & everything beautiful (the latest 2 episodes were so good with the lampshades & sofa restoration). I have been re-watching all the original episodes including the parties & when she & Micheal were so close & they were magical. I’m looking forward to watching her working with Oliver again too I loves the episodes when Micheal Petherick worked with Stephanie, they are so good together but he changed so much when Ryan & the pink haired lad was there recently? This is a brilliant place for all us lovers of Lalande to be able to exchange views without being deleted or harassed by the crazy fans

 

[ChocLili]

Diesel has just created havoc in the laundry room. New video from Selmar, who has the loveliest laugh on camera.

Yes, let’s talk about this Diesel. He sleeps too much, never thanks the generous patrons for his gifts, has latched on to animal-loving Selmar and follows him around like, well, a puppy dog, is not on the jobs list in the kitchen and is too friendly with the cat. And don’t get me started on what he’s done to Tomaz’s lovely laundry room!

 

[Raspberrybrulee]

Cadeaux at the Chateau is the thing that troubles me the most as by now it must be as uncomfortable for the participants as it is for the viewers and they must dread it coming round. I still feel compelled to watch it but I can only take a few minutes at a time. I would imagine that only around a fraction of the gifts are things that the recipients actually want or need. And surely people must realise that at Mummy's age she really doesn't need any more gardening gloves, gardening hats, gardening aprons or hand cream.

Now that Stephanie has said she'll be giving the proceeds to charity she's made it even harder to stop it (even though giving proceeds to charity is a lovely thing to do). Had she not done that, she could have made a video saying that she was incredibly grateful for all the gifts so far but it had come to a point where she'd got so much stuff that she needed to ask people to stop. Then she could have done a couple of last videos opening the backlog of gifts and then pulled the plug on it. And if she'd received any more gifts after that she could have just sent a thank you card.

As it is, she's created a bit of a monster and there's no obvious way of stopping without losing face or offending people. In a way I feel bad for her as she probably never imagined that by innocently opening up a couple of gifts on camera it would lead to the deluge that followed. She should have listened to the elusive Nic when he said that opening them on camera was a bad idea and it looked like they were asking for more stuff.

She can't even give the stuff to charity as it's all been very specifically bought or made for the recipients and it would probably cause great offence. And who else would even want the stuff? I can't imagine there are many people sitting at home thinking "my happiness would be complete if only I had a cushion with a peacock on one side and a hedgehog on the other, three tartan face masks and a scarf with Selmar and Diesel embroidered onto it"........

 

[Raspberrybrulee]

I don't think Stephanie ever has had a proper job apart from working for her parents. However there's no denying she works extremely hard now on filming and editing the vlogs and has worked hard running a B&B and workshops over the last few years - not to mention the hundreds of curtains etc she's made. I don't really begrudge her the patreon money because it allows us to see the progress on the chateau (which I adore) and also because it pays for Nati and Selmar and Dan which means Stephanie is free to make lots more videos which I also love. And there's no disputing the fact that her videos bring lots of pleasure to thousands of other people all over the world.

During lockdown when things were all a bit strange, I discovered the Chateau Diaries and for me is was a bit like finding the key to a secret room and like so many people write (in their peacock and hedgehog cards) she really does bring a great deal of joy. As a result of watching the vlogs I then found this forum which I also love as it gives us the chance to dissect the vlogs and some of the batshit crazy characters that are in them!

So yes she's privileged and yes the cadeaux videos make me cringe (although we don't have to watch those) but the rest of the videos are brilliant and better than anything else I can find on youtube or TV.

 

[Raspberrybrulee]

Stephanie has the rare skill of making vlogging look incredibly easy because she has a knack for capturing interesting content and has an assorted cast of interesting characters on hand too. As someone said upthread she is also good at banter and has a light touch and always comes back with something witty and appropriate. Because she makes it all look so effortless, the others have all decided to have a go but they're now discovering that to keep producing interesting content is so much harder than it looks.

One thing I really like about Stephanie is her generosity of spirit in that she always gives the other vloggers lots of encouragement and plugs their vlogs. I really like the way she gave Dan such a boost as him and his family deserve that - they are absolute grafters and must have suffered a couple of freezing cold winters with those babies in those draughty old buildings. I'm so glad they'll have proper heating this winter.

I could only bear to watch a couple of minutes of the Petherick's video this week as it was about their heating system which was incredibly dull. I scrolled through it quickly and it was just Michael and Billy standing in the cellar talking about pipes right through to the end so I aborted. I did watch for a second or two when Gwen appeared with the baby but then it went back to heating and pipes.

I think Michael and the Pethericks have failed to grasp what their predominantly female audience are interested in. Fancy camera angles, artistic nature shots, drone footage, speeded up motorway sequences and 15 minute central heating monologues just don't cut it for many of us. The dynamic between Stephanie's ragtag band of volunteers, employees, friends, family and love interests (new and old) make for fascinating watching and as someone else said it's like a real life soap opera.

 

[Lululime]

Cadeaux on the terrace tonight. Overall impression.....
Steve ain’t no camera man, Kats never seen so much frilly tat in her life and finds it absurd, Selmar’s living in hope that someone sends Steph a basque and she tries it on immediately, Nitty’s worried that the wrapping is adding to an ecological catastrophe and Diesel’s wondering if there’s going to be any room left in the camper for him.
Isabel meanwhile is planning an escape......and Marie is continuing in her new role of under housemaid twice removed......Phillipe was just there....but jolly decorative.
Really enjoyed it......

Going to play Adjective Bingo next time I watch......

 

[Chateau_unhinged]

I am a patreon but i am also a fence sitter, I pay the $5 a month to get the videos, it's a small price to pay as I do enjoy watching them and it's cheaper then going to the movies. She does give us lots of content although it is now becoming quite repetitive. I will give it a few more months and if the same old same old continues, I will stop paying.

Will Stephanie be a victim of her own success, absolutely.

I am trying be a good person as in the past I would have immediately trashed random people in videos etc..but I will refrain from commenting on the la laland residents/guests.

What I want to bring up here are:

1. So what if her family have money, my family have a few large homes, they worked bloody hard for them, that doesn't mean that automatically entitles them to support me with renovating my own home. From what I can tell, her mother supports her in helping her run the chateau which shows a very supportive mother but why should her mother foot the bill for her own folly?

2. The new channel Chateau Unwrapped despite created with good intentions is woeful. I wish people would stop sending her god awful presents that are only going to end up in the attic gathering dust or worse..at the brocante! The desperados hoping to get their name read out and Stephanie saying how lovely it is and it's one of her favourite things to ever receive is starting to sound contrived. Stop sending her garbage. And a lot of things being sent to her are now people sprouting their wares....some person sent something like 10 hats for Isabel....which they thanked by calling out the persons business....what a load of rubbish...

3. Patreon members are way too entitled. We get to vote how the next portion of money can be spent on. Just because you give a few bucks a month does not permit you to get all hoity toity when your choice isn't chosen. I don't bother reading the comments anymore..too many people thinking they can tell this woman how to run her life. Someone was whinging the other day as they still didn't receive their signed postcard, so they reduced their tier and was then annoyed that their name didn't appear in the credits anymore. Adults carrying on like children.

Sadly Stephanie's price for taking money will see that she has to pander to everyone's needs for fear of a revolt which is a damn shame as the channel did have potential.

 

[peony89]

Completely agree, @Suzigoggs. I find it hilarious that Brenda says she's taken four weeks out of family life and driven 2,000 miles in order to give people in the group images of the chateaux that haven't been seen before. Wtaf! No one asked her to do that and she's putting herself and everyone she came into contact with at risk. The mind truly boggles.

I imagine Stephanie and Isabelle would be mortified at the fb stuff and it's tricky because if Brenda is organising tours and events at Lalande she is representing them to a certain extent.

 

[pettyicequeen]

I am really confused. Has the thread started talking about a different couple? Do they have their own thread or are they related to Dick and Angela in some way?

I'd love for someone to start a topic on Stephanie and The Chateau Diaries (don't know if I can as a newbie)! Used to binge the vlogs but lately just feel like it's becoming weird with all the gifting and money-grabbing compared to the free labour from the volunteers.

I watched some older eps of Escape to the Chateau DIY and always felt that Angel has a lot of envy issues - she tries to hide it, but it's clear the show needs to always remind us that their chateau is the "OG" and superior to the others.

 

[ChocLili]

Selmar must get romantic offers from women all over the world and maybe when he goes off in his camper van on a weekend he is not really taking Diesel to the beach...............

Chateau de Lalande Codebreaker


Selmar’s gone to the beach for the weekend = So many lady admirers; not enough weekends.

Ohh, we must frame this = Nati, put this in the attic.

Another one . . . now we’ve got a full set = eBay

I’m still in my pyjamas = Did I mention that I’m still in my pyjamas?

What are you cooking tonight Marie? = We can’t eat flowers Marie, feed us!

Appalling artwork = Appalling artwork (Michael); Appalling artwork (Hanni)

Would you like a cup of tea? = I can see that you’re not going to make tea, so I will.

Come on in! = I really should get a lock on my bedroom door.

I’m making a time-lapse of the courtyard makeover = I can’t believe you found my spy camera.

I’ll have a ‘dirty martini’ = ***censored***

Look how big the Ians are getting = I must finish my ‘Elizabethan Peacock Recipes’ vlog.

 

[pettyicequeen]

I did get major secondary cringe of the shot of Stephanie and Hanni posing on the doorway, in robes From the looks of it Hanni had a jumper on underneath, like why? Plus the Robe Mafia? Even Marie gave that short shrift She was all like ‘I’m just going to make some tea!’

I think Marie is completely over Hanni, and also rather over the pretence of harmonious communal living. I am kind of living for her new resting bitch face when Hanni is around or people are crowding up "her" kitchen. I love Marie.

 

[frenchessence]

I am in my 40’s - working but have flexible down time. Last year I vaguely considered a few weeks working/voluntering at Lalande because then, it looked like fun but it was before the huge current success / Patreon account. When I gave it serious thought I realised it wasn’t for me (sadly I need to be paid for work then I thought perhaps I’d go and stay for a long weekend as a guest. Now, as things have changed with increased publicity & success, although I adore Stephanie & the Vlogs (NOT pass the parcel - although I still watch for horror aspect), I don’t actually think it’s a place I’d want to stay as a guest after all: Wonderful to watch it all as a spectator but a vague feeling that one would have to be interesting & fun - and up for partying & lively dinner conversation .... almost as if there’s be a bit of (albeit invisible) pressure as a guest. Perhaps it’s different if you are a couple, but I’m on my own, and it would seem odd if you stayed tucked away in your room and didn’t join in. I think I’d need more energy than I currently have to holiday at a Lalande: They are mostly a bunch of extroverts - which strangely enough I am ... but when I go away, I want to relax completely. Those who don’t shine, stick out like a sore thumb (ie reserved Garden Architectect, whose name I’ve already forgotten). I think I’d feel as if I had a walk on part in a play in a beautiful theatre - but was paying them for the privilege ! But good luck to all who sail in her, or whatever the saying is !

 

[frenchessence]

Re: Brenda’s Christmas Workshop

Oh dear. This set up is basically a paid for meet and greet with Stephanie and Michael. Sprinkled with some activities- that do sound nice indeed but cannot conceal it’s not about the offered activities themselves. It’s sounds like going to a petting zoo. Don’t get me wrong- if you are crazy enough to pay for a meet’n’greet this truly offers a lot. But it just feels wrong and like a complete sell out.

@frenchessence : I get being enchanted and impressed of her videos and the restoration. So donating money for the Chateau- as it was in the beginning. The stain glass window, the lake. But yeah, Stephanie is not scraping by. She and her partners were very careful not go all in and fear financial ruin. It’s business 101 and a wise decision but it also means she would have been fine the next 15 years.
The gift giving should have never gone so out of hand. I wish she would have never opened those gifts on camera. People start complaining that their gifts haven’t been opened yet. I mean, maybe there was nothing nice to say about it? Or it didn’t arrive? Or they lost it somewhere in the piles? No one has a right to have their gifts opened in public. It’s a gift not an exchange. Why is it important to watch her opening your gift? That’s pretty obsessive voyourism. She should have thanked them in private and leave it at that. Maybe showing the things she really really loved? But there would be way less gifts that way. She should have spoke out against it from the start. You can be grateful but say- please don’t send gifts. Her quotes on how she is VERY grateful but that no one should feel pressured in sending gifts always were a bit half arsed. My guess is this was a bit of a slippery slope. It started small and then went out of hand. She probably never expected this would happen and feels bound to continue with this format that she started when it was just one gift per week. My biggest criticism is actually not her but Nick and Marie. They should have never let Antoine into a situation where people expect to see him open their gifts. They are adults and should be able to analyse and weigh the consequences in the future. He always looks a bit puzzled and uncomfortable. And you can tell that he thinks half the stuff is stupid trash. Even though he tries very hard, bless his heart.


Stephanie should not hire people that approach her because of the channel. She should hire professionals and pay them! A social media manager/PR person would be a good investment. This person should dodge down the fan channels and have them disclose they are just that. Comments on her YT channel could be moderated properly. Nati would have support around the website. They definitely should set up their own verified FC and Insta. Even if they don’t put much on there, but just to make clear that these are the official pages. Brenda is a bit of a loose canon and a pot stirrer. The second she turns on Stephanie it’s gonna get ugly. I wonder how she will deal with it when the other business partners put their foot down. Nick and Michael Potts might not be too impressed in the long run. It’s a very complicated set up with Stephanie basically living two lives. The volunteers, all fun LaLande life and the business running, jet set with well-off friends lifestyle (Nick, Michael, Oliver, Mason...). It doesn’t merge well. There always a bit of a tension in the vlogs when both worlds clash.



There are really a ton of French Chateaus in offer. My personal explanation is, that the French market for Chateaus is saturated and that the French are maybe not that interested in owning their own Chateau. It’s the same with the great antiques in the thrift shops. How are they not bought up and sold for a higher price? People here are really into having a few old pieces and the market is pretty expensive now. I mean, France found a pretty radical solution to get rid of their aristocracy, so maybe they don’t value the buildings and furniture not that much. Especially as there are still tons left open for the public. Other countries didn’t decide against their aristocracy with the same fire, some would have kept them but had to get rid for other reasons, some still have them. And as I said, France is truly full of Chateaus. I think they have the highest amount.

@Great_Kate You write so on all aspects. I think of Stephanie like an adorable Labrador puppy. She is full of energy, fun & fluffiness (generally cared for by an adoring owner aka Isobel). She is bouncing along playfully, unaware the world is a dangerous place with loons like Brenda (Funky Gibbons) whose suffocating adoration of her untrained pet, is going to end in tears. SJ is nothing less than delightful but even puppies have hackles that rise & I imagine her sitting in bed in a wyncette onesie clutching a hot water bottle & saying to Isobel ‘What on earth can we do about Brenda?’
What you said about fan pages (and employees) is spot on ... it’s easy to be outsiders & criticise but a safer way forward would have been to curate a more restrained business model. That present giving thingymajig is dreadful & has to stop. In my unworthy opinion she needs to distance herself not only from Brenda etc., but also from Ryan - he is harmless but not too bright & I feel a little uneasy about him. Same with the Pethericks . Did anyone see The Darling Buds of May on British tv ? They are like a less charming, attractive offshoot of the Larkin family.
Stephanie could continue doing bits & pieces with Michael here & there (music/cooking) but I believe her association with the family in general will have a long term affect on her image.
She said in an earlier blog that she & Michael (?) wanted to keep control of what they did which is probably why she didn’t go to a TV channel /publisher. She needs to be circumspect. She’s a brilliant, watchable presenter - there’s so many ways she could benefit from her skills ...cookbooks, interior shows, renovation or history documentaries- all of which could fund Lalande. She is her own Golden Ticket & before it’s too late she should reassess the situation.

The last thing I’d like to say is that Marie & Gwendoline should set up home together Far From The Madding Crowds. I actually start to feel depressed when I see & hear them, They seem so sad & depressed.....

 

[Raspberrybrulee]

@Great_Kate I agree with a lot of what you say. Stephanie has charisma in bucket loads and whilst most of the volunteers are nice, they just don't have her star quality or presence. From the first time I saw Stephanie on ETTC DIY I was absolutely fascinated by her - she is a rare combination of beauty, intelligence, style, humour and kindness and I love her confidence and complete lack of vanity (who else could pull off the bag on the head and dressing gown look with such flair). She lights up the room and you can tell that when she's busy editing or uploading that the others are miserable without her and track her down and plead with her to join them - she is literally the life and soul of the party. Her goodness and kindness shine out and that's why people want to keep giving her lavish gifts despite her being more privileged than most of them. She also has the knack of making vlogging look easy and effortless and that's why so many people have jumped on the bandwagon only to discover it's way harder than it looks. Just like the way Graham Norton makes chat show presenting look so easy - they both share that natural warmth and humour and light touch that few others can emulate.

Of all the other vloggers, Ryan is about the only one who can hold my interest as he's passionate and charismatic. I really enjoy Dan the gardener's videos too and whilst he doesn't have the big personality, he is a genuine, hardworking man who is working round the clock to make a home for his young family and I love to see the progress he's making and the interactions with his wife and cute boys.

 

[Lululime]

Frankly I feel the opinion police seem to have moved in. The beauty of this site is that we should feel able to share perceptions and opinions and at times agree to disagree without labelling or judging each other....that’s where we have (should I say had?) the advantage over the over zealous folk in the vlog comments.....
However....undeterred and neither a misogynist, a grotesque or someone who is generally found very laughable....I will carry on giving my opinion.....love to you all xxx