The Chateau Diaries #404 None of these grifters could draw a straight line with a ruler, they’re too crooked

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One of the first thing that made me doubt fan was when I discovered she had lived at the place for 15 years. I was literally dumbstruck that someone who purports to love the place had done so very little. I can understand she may not have been able to afford to have a new kitchen but she certainly could have painted the windows and the shutters herself. Then I looked at the garden or lack of it. The place was a tip a weed infested driveway and no effort to pretty up the front. If she had friends in the area they would have given her plants and with a bit of effort the drive and terrace could have looked gorgeous. Fox gloves and woodland plants around the chapel, but it became abundantly clear that she doesn't love the place or have an aesthetic appreciation otherwise she couldn't live for 5 years with her office wall knocked down and peeling paper.

At this juncture it's embarrassing how lazy she is. Look at what Dan has done with his garden and he is virtually single handedly restoring that wreck. Stephanie is shameless she is a sloth, lying around with a full staff waiting on her. She can blithely walk past weeds and decay and doesn't give a tit. When I moved into a wreck of a house I grafted after work, at weekends and have created a garden from a derelict wasteland with brambles and ivy. I do like things to look nice so I budgeted worked hard and got the restoration done.

I don't know about the rest of you, but if I have a lazy day lolling around I feel deflated after the day and lack energy. Stephanie festers in her pit and lies around all the time so she has become blind to the awfulness of Lieland it is a complete style bypass, it looks unloved and it is obvious that she is not up to restoring the house or the garden. She has supremely bad taste and not a scintilla of work ethic. She really is a complete waste of space-her on screen personality is just that for on screen only, she is not sociable and is not a good human being which is why she has no friends.
 
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I am becoming more and more disappointed to see Ombeline so entrenched there that she - the "gardener" - is helping to move furniture in that hell hole. And when I say "hell hole", I'm not talking about the holes in Snort's jumper!

I mean, really......Ombeline's that hard up for views on her new vlog? I've watched them and would say, yes, she probably is.

And who here was surprised to see Philip actually doing some physical labor?
With regard to Ombeline, I thought Pavlina had roped her in to help with the lifting because she thought there was more pieces to the cabinet than there actually was. So for now I'll give Ombeline the benefit of the doubt.
 
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Oh excitement, excitement, excitement Bunboy is back. He managed to measure two bits of wood in the new dining room and will now bugger off for another 6 months.

fan sick my a.
There is something wrong with him. He's twitchy, itchy, & fiddly. He's rocking & swaying, he was only missing a baby..he's uncomfortable in front of camera..he was making me feel uncomfortable watching him..
 
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Baldilocks was particularly animated following his sleepover and day out in Chateauroux with Tobacco Johnny. As much as Baldilocks gets a dopamine hit from spending fan's money at auctions, I don't think it was just the purchase of 3 chandeliers that put this big, overly excited smile on his face.

I didn't have the sound on (Lord A is watching the hockey playoffs), so based on his gestures, this is the conversation I imagine which transpired between fan and Baldilocks when he arrived back at the shitoo.

You look very happy Darling. How was your playdate with John?
1778089222935.png


fan, wait until I tell you. You're not going to believe it!
1778089416689.png


It was absolutely A-OK ! fan, unlike you, Uncle Johnny doesn't mind that my pen is the size of my pinky finger.
1778089615999.png


Uncle Johnny doesn't point and laugh at me the way you do!
1778089200285.png


fan, you know that large attic room Uncle Johnny was planning to be a library?
1778089164810.png


Well, Uncle Johnny's now turning it into a giant sex dungeon, except it's in the attic....
1778089643742.png


Last night it was filled with all these hot men dressed as cherubs and playing violins.
1778089146220.png


Initially I thought no one wanted to play with me because I was sitting all alone on a sofa (again)....
1778089328786.png


I was nervous and my butt checks were clenched tight.
1778089247238.png


I even considered pushing away their advances.
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But after a few small spanks on my bottom....
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I eventually let my guard down, opened myself up to it all and enjoyed the party.
1778089272340.png


It was so hard to bid Uncle Johnny farewell today.
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When I close my eyes I dream of the next time I'm together with Uncle Johnny.
1778089518523.png


Darling, hear me out on this. While driving back to the shitoo from the auction today, I was thinking we should toss away all the books, forget our plans for a library, and turn it into a sex dungeon. BDSM, Fetish and Furry retreats would be much more profitable and fun. Please consider the idea.
1778089181436.png


Darling, do we have any calomine lotion?
1778089350962.png


I seem to be reacting to Uncle Johnny's leather bondage outfits and breaking out in hives.
1778089368884.png
 
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Yes! Lets cook beefburgers next to a field of cows!!! Nice story about the constipated dog too...

1778093213850.png
:cautious:
 
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I forgot she does intermittent fasting, and then she eats a giant dinner and goes right to bed? No wonder she has no energy and sleeps all day.
 
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Baldilocks was particularly animated following his sleepover and day out in Chateauroux with Tobacco Johnny. As much as Baldilocks gets a dopamine hit from spending fan's money at auctions, I don't think it was just the purchase of 3 chandeliers that put this big, overly excited smile on his face.

I didn't have the sound on (Lord A is watching the hockey playoffs), so based on his gestures, this is the conversation I imagine which transpired between fan and Baldilocks when he arrived back at the shitoo.

You look very happy Darling. How was your playdate with John?
View attachment 3982347

fan, wait until I tell you. You're not going to believe it!
View attachment 3982363

It was absolutely A-OK ! fan, unlike you, Uncle Johnny doesn't mind that my pen is the size of my pinky finger.
View attachment 3982398

Uncle Johnny doesn't point and laugh at me the way you do!
View attachment 3982345

fan, you know that large attic room Uncle Johnny was planning to be a library?
View attachment 3982342

Well, Uncle Johnny's now turning it into a giant sex dungeon, except it's in the attic....
View attachment 3982399

Last night it was filled with all these hot men dressed as cherubs and playing violins.
View attachment 3982340

Initially I thought no one wanted to play with me because I was sitting all alone on a sofa (again)....
View attachment 3982352

I was nervous and my butt checks were clenched tight.
View attachment 3982348

I even considered pushing away their advances.
View attachment 3982396

But after a few small spanks on my bottom....
View attachment 3982350

I eventually let my guard down, opened myself up to it all and enjoyed the party.
View attachment 3982349

It was so hard to bid Uncle Johnny farewell today.
View attachment 3982372

When I close my eyes I dream of the next time I'm together with Uncle Johnny.
View attachment 3982383

Darling, hear me out on this. While driving back to the shitoo from the auction today, I was thinking we should toss away all the books, forget our plans for a library, and turn it into a sex dungeon. BDSM, Fetish and Furry retreats would be much more profitable and fun. Please consider the idea.
View attachment 3982344

Darling, do we have any calomine lotion?
View attachment 3982353

I seem to be reacting to Uncle Johnny's leather bondage outfits and breaking out i Un hives.
View attachment 3982355
Unless Philth is a real dirt piggie, I doubt he would be John's type. John can afford the best of the best! (...according to my gay mate lol )
 
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A clafoutis would be more fitting in France surely. I like bread and butter pudding but it is an English pud
Well I’m not living in France (sadly) but I’d still cook it there. The one I mentioned rises a bit almost soufflé like but then again I’d not be providing meals people had paid a heady price for 😵💫
 
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A clafoutis would be more fitting in France surely. I like bread and butter pudding but it is an English pud
And… FRK says something like ‘ and a traditional’ bread and butter pudding. She is not English, ‘ it’ is not French. It’s just bizarre. It is like a child pretending to be cooking in a Wendy house. The ingredients are just something she made up. No idea.
 
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Well I’m not living in France (sadly) but I’d still cook it there. The one I mentioned rises a bit almost soufflé like but then again I’d not be providing meals people had paid a heady price for 😵💫
The same guest took a photo of the security camera, or is it? It looks like a dummy one or more like watching people? Snorts is spying ? IDK
IMG_3150.png
 
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If …fan has had any surgery it should have been laser eye surgery.
Her dresses with the buttons undone to her navel have not really caught the attention of anyone,and as for Snorts being interested in her, that’s a fail.
Sadly she will always be dressing up with nowhere to go.
IMG_3149.png
 
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With regard to Ombeline, I thought Pavlina had roped her in to help with the lifting because she thought there was more pieces to the cabinet than there actually was. So for now I'll give Ombeline the benefit of the doubt.
Her dogs are really lovely. However I don’t think filming at the dump will be welcomed by Fannykins even if they are just’ shorts’ there will be clues for Tattle sleuths….
IMG_3157.png
 
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Yes! Lets cook beefburgers next to a field of cows!!! Nice story about the constipated dog too...

View attachment 3982482:cautious:
Nati does one thing ,the peel and stick tiles in the bathroom. Amaury has to say she didn't buy enough and he would not want those in the house, ok for a trailer though. I say when do you ever work at the farmhouse? Seems to be plenty of time to do nothing at your place. Notice the railings are not done. Does anything ever actually get finished????
 
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Dans window / door onto balcony, compare yet again with scruffy, rotten, dirty, dilapidated such at Fannys.
 
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We saw what FRK had prepared…I use this term lightly…as who would serve bread and butter pudding to guests .
However the guest took some photos and posted them with his review…he gave 5* in case anyone is wondering!
View attachment 3982268View attachment 3982269
Dried out crud.
Baldilocks was particularly animated following his sleepover and day out in Chateauroux with Tobacco Johnny. As much as Baldilocks gets a dopamine hit from spending fan's money at auctions, I don't think it was just the purchase of 3 chandeliers that put this big, overly excited smile on his face.

I didn't have the sound on (Lord A is watching the hockey playoffs), so based on his gestures, this is the conversation I imagine which transpired between fan and Baldilocks when he arrived back at the shitoo.

You look very happy Darling. How was your playdate with John?
View attachment 3982347

fan, wait until I tell you. You're not going to believe it!
View attachment 3982363

It was absolutely A-OK ! fan, unlike you, Uncle Johnny doesn't mind that my pen is the size of my pinky finger.
View attachment 3982398

Uncle Johnny doesn't point and laugh at me the way you do!
View attachment 3982345

fan, you know that large attic room Uncle Johnny was planning to be a library?
View attachment 3982342

Well, Uncle Johnny's now turning it into a giant sex dungeon, except it's in the attic....
View attachment 3982399

Last night it was filled with all these hot men dressed as cherubs and playing violins.
View attachment 3982340

Initially I thought no one wanted to play with me because I was sitting all alone on a sofa (again)....
View attachment 3982352

I was nervous and my butt checks were clenched tight.
View attachment 3982348

I even considered pushing away their advances.
View attachment 3982396

But after a few small spanks on my bottom....
View attachment 3982350

I eventually let my guard down, opened myself up to it all and enjoyed the party.
View attachment 3982349

It was so hard to bid Uncle Johnny farewell today.
View attachment 3982372

When I close my eyes I dream of the next time I'm together with Uncle Johnny.
View attachment 3982383

Darling, hear me out on this. While driving back to the shitoo from the auction today, I was thinking we should toss away all the books, forget our plans for a library, and turn it into a sex dungeon. BDSM, Fetish and Furry retreats would be much more profitable and fun. Please consider the idea.
View attachment 3982344

Darling, do we have any calomine lotion?
View attachment 3982353

I seem to be reacting to Uncle Johnny's leather bondage outfits and breaking out in hives.
View attachment 3982355
Oh my lord this is great. You paaaahfectly captioned each photo to go along with arm motions.
 
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