Talking to some one online.

New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Hi, when talking to someone online getting to know them etc. How often do you think you should be talking? Like what would not be enough for you?
 
I’d be more worried about loads of contact than less. I’d be very wary of someone who, for example, tried to keep a conversation ticking over for large amounts of your day and in particular if you are busy doing other things. If you chat once a day or less but the conversation and the interest flows that would suggest you are talking to someone with a life of their own and no other motive.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4
I met someone from Tinder a few years ago after about a month of texting and a few phonecalls, but it could have been longer had we not gotten on so well from the off! If you meet anyone just make sure to give details to a friend or two about where/when it's happening!
 
  • Like
Reactions: 2
Yes sorry!
I would just see how the conversation flows... when I was online dating (about 4-5yrs ago now) If it didn't feel like they could be bothered and there wasn't many open ended conversation I just left it... when I was speaking to my now partner, we chatted all day everyday, the conversation just flowed nice and easily for us and weve been together ever since and were now engaged, with a baby! ☺
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 3
Just ensure that you get a FaceTime call. Zoom call in after about two weeks!
 
  • Like
Reactions: 2
I think I was speaking to my boyfriend (texting) for about a week before we went on our first date - we probably used to text maybe 2/3 times a day before we met, didn’t speak on the phone or anything. Don’t see the point in dragging it on, I think it’s better to meet and know if you like someone rather than wasting time spending ages texting back and forth.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 5
I’m stuck between thinking. We should be speaking often and wondering why we’re not but also realise that’s not healthy and people have their own lives 😂
 
I think it’s quality more than quantity. If you are finding yourself thinking ‘it’s time to talk to x, it’s been too long, what can we talk about...’ that’s probably not ideal. If you are comfortably dropping in and out of each other’s lives that’s much better. I do agree with others though, maybe try to FaceTime him soon? It’s a lot easier to see what someone is like in a real time conversation!
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1
I’d be more worried about loads of contact than less. I’d be very wary of someone who, for example, tried to keep a conversation ticking over for large amounts of your day and in particular if you are busy doing other things. If you chat once a day or less but the conversation and the interest flows that would suggest you are talking to someone with a life of their own and no other motive.
Dont agree with this at all - sometimes you do want to keep the conversation going as thats how you get to know someone? Yes I wouldnt want someone bombardiing me with messages but more often than not, when i have met someone online, it is a continuous convo, whether thats minutes or hours between messages that doesnt matter. Replying to messages doesnt mean you dont have a life. But, each to their own.

I would just see how the conversation flows... when I was online dating (about 4-5yrs ago now) If it didn't feel like they could be bothered and there wasn't many open ended conversation I just left it... when I was speaking to my now partner, we chatted all day everyday, the conversation just flowed nice and easily for us and weve been together ever since and were now engaged, with a baby! ☺
Yeah this is lovely :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: 3
for those saying you want to keep the convo going a while, why don’t you just meet the person after say a week and have those convos in person instead? Genuinely curious. When I was online dating a while back I’d talk to someone for a couple of days, get an idea of what they’re like then ask to meet. I always found if you talk ALL the time for a long time then you can sometimes meet in person and have no spark & all that time has been wasted.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 6
for those saying you want to keep the convo going a while, why don’t you just meet the person after say a week and have those convos in person instead? Genuinely curious. When I was online dating a while back I’d talk to someone for a couple of days, get an idea of what they’re like then ask to meet. I always found if you talk ALL the time for a long time then you can sometimes meet in person and have no spark & all that time has been wasted.
Exactly what happened to me. Did a bit of online dating last year and chatted to a few guys for a couple of weeks and then meet. With one guy it was 4 weeks and we got on so well, would chat on the phone in the evenings and convinced myself I’d met ‘the one’. But when we met in person there was zero spark and I didn’t fancy him (he did not look like his photos) and I wish I hadn’t wasted my time.

However I did end up meeting my boyfriend on Tinder, we chatted for about 5 days (was pretty constant messaging) went on a date and been together since September 😊
 
  • Like
Reactions: 3
I met my boyfriend online a few years ago late November and we didn’t have our first date until mid January, although in that time between, I was in hospital with a kidney infection, there was christmas/new year etc. We spoke every day during that time, but sometimes it was just a quick ‘how’s your day been’ and others it was a deeper conversation. It worked for us ☺

My advice would be just to see how the conversation flows, it will probably be different with each person! Though I’d definitely want to establish early on if they do eventually want to meet for a date, or if it’s purely just online chat, just so you know you’re on the same page.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 3
I would always say try and meet as soon as possible rather than talking for an extended period of time. You might spend weeks talking to someone to only meet and find out you don’t have chemistry face to face.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4
I met my partner on Tinder 6 years ago, we spoke pretty much non stop for a week before meeting and have been together ever since.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4
I met my partner on Tinder 6 years ago, we spoke pretty much non stop for a week before meeting and have been together ever since.
Same! But 2 years ago. 😋 I find that early bit so exciting, before you've even met, and if the chemistry is still there in person it's amazing. My partner has moved in this month and it's the first time we haven't been messaging almost constantly all day... Yes maybe we're losers, but we just never got sick of talking to each other.
 
  • Heart
  • Like
Reactions: 4
I usually speak for about 3 days to a week before meeting someone ... I’ve only been on 3 ‘dates’ this year! One guy messaged me on a Saturday night and it turned out he lived over the road so we met at the pub next door and despite there being no romantic spark we’re now really good friends 🤦🏼‍♀️ but I find it’s best to meet them sooner, you don’t want to waste your time!
 
  • Heart
  • Like
Reactions: 2