Scott Mills

[Mark81]

I think there is or was some cultural aspect to it (as there would have been with older richer guys buying younger girls drinks or fancying them or liking “jailbait”) but also things have evolved in the last 10 - 20 years and that whole thing is more often condemned (Both gay and straight). On Millionaire Matchmaker Patty is always talking about guys wanting “spinners” that’s pretty vile.

I think there Is some nuance and with Spacey it’s a bit like that pervy PE/Drama/Music teacher at school who used to always date Sixth formers and with Schofe it’s so far outside of acceptable as he knew the kid as pre-pubescent through to “unwise but not illegal” those are wrong whether boys or girls, it’s not homophobic to think so.

Scott having a younger hubby, Fry having a much younger hubby - meh those facts alone aren‘t problematic.

For me , with Fry its not the age gaps themselves. Its the fact that the guys look so much younger. Hes clearly into very young looking guys, gives me the ick a bit.

Tom Daleys relationship is icky. Lance met him when he was very young and vulnerable after his dad died. He even admitted as much in an interview, which now seems to have vanished from the Internet from what I can tell.

 

[Minkymo]

As a straight white woman in her mid 50's who obviously lives in a complete innocent bubble, I'm finding all this new (to me) information fascinating, thank you for helping educate me

 

[HotesTilaire]

For me , with Fry its not the age gaps themselves. Its the fact that the guys look so much younger. Hes clearly into very young looking guys, gives me the ick a bit.

Tom Daleys relationship is icky. Lance met him when he was very young and vulnerable after his dad died. He even admitted as much in an interview, which now seems to have vanished from the Internet from what I can tell.

But I don’t recall seeing Fry with a procession of young men, it seems like they met each other and that was it, not that he only ever goes for young looking lads.

Presumably if the “only” or main attraction is looking young, then the young spouses will be ditched and replaced in due course.

 

[L3moning]

resumably if the “only” or main attraction is looking young, then the young spouses will be ditched and replaced in due course.

See Leonardo DiCaprio, as already mentioned.

 

[HotesTilaire]

See Leonardo DiCaprio, as already mentioned.

Exactamundo. Sorry babe, you don’t qualify for a young persons railcard any more and your brain is fully grown - it’s over.

 

[CallaLily]

Yeah I dont see much wrong, aside the possible cheating, in the start of their relationship. 28 and 44 isnt an awful gap. 28 you're a fully grown man, no relationship power issue and depending on the individuals involved, not necessarily a big difference in mentalities.

If it was bad from the inside, then only he can say that.

Indeed. It very much depends on the timing. My husband is 15 years older than I am but we met when I was 32. A fully grown adult and no power or relationship imbalance. Had I been 15 and him 30, that wouldn't have been remotely the same. Or, if I'd been 20 and he in a position of power, wealth or influence*


*he wasn't in a position of power, wealth or influence when I met him at 32, which was disappointing

 

[HotesTilaire]

Indeed. It very much depends on the timing. My husband is 15 years older than I am but we met when I was 32. A fully grown adult and no power or relationship imbalance. Had I been 15 and him 30, that wouldn't have been remotely the same. Or, if I'd been 20 and he in a position of power, wealth or influence*


*he wasn't in a position of power, wealth or influence when I met him at 32, which was disappointing

is he now?

 

[Tangerine Dream]

I didn't like his statement at all.

Innocent until proven guilty but "speaking out" to basically play victim in what he seemed to think was a subtle manner but really wasn't is not a good look.

Nobody can manage a dignified silence anymore. If he wanted to thank his 'supporters' he could have done it privately, and wait until he could say more to address anyone else

 

[DoreenMachine]

Honestly what gives me the ick is how much he seems to be enchanted by Olly Alexander, I don’t get it.

Me neither, Olly is the most desperate try hard little twerp, he is so grating!

 

[Archduchess of Luxembourg]

What is a spinner?

 

[HotesTilaire]

A short thin petite young woman they can spin on their d

 

[Tangerine Dream]

Me neither, Olly is the most desperate try hard little twerp, he is so grating!

I cringe inside out at his Eurovision performance. Simulated sex in a grotty toilet? Way to challenge stereotypes.

 

[DoreenMachine]

I cringe inside out at his Eurovision performance. Simulated sex in a grotty toilet? Way to challenge stereotypes.

He seems to think he is some groundbreaking artiste, but he just screams musical theatre school pick me, he comes across as so desperate.

He did a programme for the BBC about 'growing up gay' interviewing some people who for various reasons really struggled coming out etc, and the whole thing was just cringe af. It ended up being mostly him whining about his own experiences, he seems very self obsessed.

His solo career hasn't exactly been a success, it's clear most of the talent in Years and Years came from the other band mates, I imagine they got tired of his schtick.

 

[MarshMallowMonster]

I do think about the alleged victim in this case, watching all this unfold.

There is a lot of support for SM despite his statement which was not a compete denial of what may or may not have happened.

The statement has been carefully curated with knowledges that we aren’t privy to. Scott knows what he did and didn’t do. He knows what evidence the boy has. Scott knows the case was closed in 2016 due to lack of evidence, knows precisely what he was accused of back then.

The boy can rightly sell his story to the press if he wants, I wonder if he is thinking to do that?

CSA survivors seeking justice can be very driven, a voice that needs to be heard. Even many years later.

 

[Bagpuss20]

I cringe inside out at his Eurovision performance. Simulated sex in a grotty toilet? Way to challenge stereotypes.

The song was quite good but the performance totally ruined any chances we had.

 

[Yel]

My gut feeling with this was Scott had a relationship of sorts with someone 14-15 when he was 22-23.

I'm not sure if his statement disproves this as if this was the case admitting it, even with the caveat of thinking the boy was older, would be admitting a crime that the CPS have found not enough evidence to charge. There's the guidance about if you genuinely believe someone is 14+ then that is a defence, but this seems very grey.

Back when I was 15 so many of us had fake ID and said we were 18. I can't remember challenge 25 being a thing 30 years ago.

Obviously my gut feeling is biased by my personal opinion of Scott and that (unlike many others) there hasn't been a lot of rumours about him that predate the sacking.

 

[katz2022]

My gut feeling with this was Scott had a relationship of sorts with someone 14-15 when he was 22-23.

I'm not sure if his statement disproves this as if this was the case admitting it, even with the caveat of thinking the boy was older, would be admitting a crime that the CPS have found not enough evidence to charge. There's the guidance about if you genuinely believe someone is 14+ then that is a defence, but this seems very grey.

Back when I was 15 so many of us had fake ID and said we were 18. I can't remember challenge 25 being a thing 30 years ago.

Obviously my gut feeling is biased by my personal opinion of Scott and that (unlike many others) there hasn't been a lot of rumours about him that predate the sacking.

But this incident wasn’t a one off apparently. People don’t seem to realise that this allegedly spread over a three year period? No one could conceal their age that whole time. It would be glaringly obvious that someone was just a boy.

 

[Boogs]

Yes, 3 things stand out to me here. The length of time it went on, the fact its being reported as serious sexual offences and the carefully worded statement he put out. Just because there weren’t rumours about him it doesn’t mean that things weren’t happening. Some abusers can be very charming and covert. This situation doesn’t sit well with me at all.

 

[Merpedy]

Also the new information likely comes from the alleged victim - there’s only so many parties that would have access to new information after all

If it is the victim then this has clearly left enough of an impression on them several decades later

There’s some people I lied about my age to and honestly I wouldn’t bother with pursuing them in this way because I was a willing participant and the experiences haven’t left me traumatised

 

[MarshMallowMonster]

Yep, underage abuse over a 3 year period.

The lad would have lived at home with parents for example or with caregivers. It’s hard to imagine the lad hiding his true age for a 3 year period.