Eyesopened
VIP Member
You know what else will get you sacked ?
Using police computers for non work related issues
Using police computers for non work related issues
- Notice
PutinOnTheRitz
Active member
As I’m waiting for whatever is happening in the Hamstercage House of Horrors to be disclosed, I thought I’d write a little story to amuse in the meantime.
The Rancido
A chroll took a stroll down Brixham town
A hun saw the chroll, and looked them up and down
“Where are you going to, you monstrous chroll,
Come and eat sandwiches in the Hobbit Hole?”
It’s a horrific offer, hun, so no -
I’m trying to meet up with a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She has terrible shits and they’re awfully stinky,
She shares them with Josh, who we all call Slinky
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here, by these rocks
and her favourite thing is greasy, limp locks.
“Greasy, limp locks?” The hun looked sad
“Goodbye chroll, even I think that’s bad”
Silly old hun! Doesn’t she know,
There are far worse things about the Rancido
On went the chroll down to the harbour
Josh was then, kitted out all in Barbour
“Where are you going to, you monstrous chroll?
Come and watch birds whilst I sign on the dole”
It’s a triggering offer, Joyce, but no
I’m trying to hunt down a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She has lots of money and a lack of taste
And since she hit peri, she’s got no waist
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here by this farm
She’s in the process of causing kids lasting harm
“Lasting harm? No way” Josh scoffed and then said
“I’m the one at risk, I share her bed”
Silly old Josh! Doesn’t he know
He and his kids should flee the Rancido
On went the chroll, who came to the beach
And bumped into Wibble, eating a peach
“Where are you going, you monstrous chroll?
Come and eat firelighters and maybe some coal”
It’s a wow-tastic offer, Wilbs, but no
I’m trying to stalk a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She’s actually your mummy, but you wouldn’t guess
She’s determined to make all her kids’ lives a mess
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here at this pub,
She’ll drive fizzy cat’s piss and eat some posh grub
“Sans kids?” Wibble asked, looking quite glum
“Never mind” he quipped, “I can find a new mum”
Bright little Wilbur, he’s smarter than Jo
He knows how to scare off the Rancid…
OH!
But who is this creature with awful clothes,
Stretched out eyebrows and a squinty nose
She has tiny tits and turned in toes
And is top of the league when it comes to hoes
Her skin is brown, like overcooked beef
Her kids are escaping and so are her teeth
Oh help, oh no
It’s a Rancido
“An actual chroll!” the Rancido said
No, said the Tattler, it’s all in your head
“In my head?” said the Rancido, “that can’t be true
Tattlers are chrolls, especially you
You’re all just jealous and horrifically mean
Of my books and my talent and the way I say seen”
No way! said the Tattler, I’d live in a bin
Before I said seen the way you say “sin”
Your writings deluded, your husband’s a sap
I’d rather watch Ethel taking a crap
Your family is broken, your bills are sky high
You care not a jot and fly to Dubai
Fat tears splash down and the vomiting starts
Not for your babies or their tiny broken hearts
Instead it’s all “myself”, “me” and “I”
The Rancido can always squeeze out a cry
Sort yourself out, the Tattler commanded
Get the Patchwork shitshow fully disbanded
Tend to your kids, house and pets
Stop fibbing about costs and bills from your vets
Come clean about scamming and going on the rob
Delete insta and find a real job
Remove the quiff and wonky smile
Tell the truth and find your own style
The Rancido took a moment, shrugged and replied
“My mum abandoned me when I was four” she loudly cried
“I wanted those trainers, love and big hugs
I didn’t get them, so I turned to hard drugs
Now I live on fresh air and am buying a van
“Why?”, I hear you ask
Well, just because I can!
The Rancido
A chroll took a stroll down Brixham town
A hun saw the chroll, and looked them up and down
“Where are you going to, you monstrous chroll,
Come and eat sandwiches in the Hobbit Hole?”
It’s a horrific offer, hun, so no -
I’m trying to meet up with a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She has terrible shits and they’re awfully stinky,
She shares them with Josh, who we all call Slinky
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here, by these rocks
and her favourite thing is greasy, limp locks.
“Greasy, limp locks?” The hun looked sad
“Goodbye chroll, even I think that’s bad”
Silly old hun! Doesn’t she know,
There are far worse things about the Rancido
On went the chroll down to the harbour
Josh was then, kitted out all in Barbour
“Where are you going to, you monstrous chroll?
Come and watch birds whilst I sign on the dole”
It’s a triggering offer, Joyce, but no
I’m trying to hunt down a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She has lots of money and a lack of taste
And since she hit peri, she’s got no waist
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here by this farm
She’s in the process of causing kids lasting harm
“Lasting harm? No way” Josh scoffed and then said
“I’m the one at risk, I share her bed”
Silly old Josh! Doesn’t he know
He and his kids should flee the Rancido
On went the chroll, who came to the beach
And bumped into Wibble, eating a peach
“Where are you going, you monstrous chroll?
Come and eat firelighters and maybe some coal”
It’s a wow-tastic offer, Wilbs, but no
I’m trying to stalk a Rancido
“A Rancido? What’s a Rancido?”
A Rancido! Why, didn’t you know?
She’s actually your mummy, but you wouldn’t guess
She’s determined to make all her kids’ lives a mess
“Where are you meeting her?”
Here at this pub,
She’ll drive fizzy cat’s piss and eat some posh grub
“Sans kids?” Wibble asked, looking quite glum
“Never mind” he quipped, “I can find a new mum”
Bright little Wilbur, he’s smarter than Jo
He knows how to scare off the Rancid…
OH!
But who is this creature with awful clothes,
Stretched out eyebrows and a squinty nose
She has tiny tits and turned in toes
And is top of the league when it comes to hoes
Her skin is brown, like overcooked beef
Her kids are escaping and so are her teeth
Oh help, oh no
It’s a Rancido
“An actual chroll!” the Rancido said
No, said the Tattler, it’s all in your head
“In my head?” said the Rancido, “that can’t be true
Tattlers are chrolls, especially you
You’re all just jealous and horrifically mean
Of my books and my talent and the way I say seen”
No way! said the Tattler, I’d live in a bin
Before I said seen the way you say “sin”
Your writings deluded, your husband’s a sap
I’d rather watch Ethel taking a crap
Your family is broken, your bills are sky high
You care not a jot and fly to Dubai
Fat tears splash down and the vomiting starts
Not for your babies or their tiny broken hearts
Instead it’s all “myself”, “me” and “I”
The Rancido can always squeeze out a cry
Sort yourself out, the Tattler commanded
Get the Patchwork shitshow fully disbanded
Tend to your kids, house and pets
Stop fibbing about costs and bills from your vets
Come clean about scamming and going on the rob
Delete insta and find a real job
Remove the quiff and wonky smile
Tell the truth and find your own style
The Rancido took a moment, shrugged and replied
“My mum abandoned me when I was four” she loudly cried
“I wanted those trainers, love and big hugs
I didn’t get them, so I turned to hard drugs
Now I live on fresh air and am buying a van
“Why?”, I hear you ask
Well, just because I can!
Wotsit
VIP Member
Do we prance around on insta in just our underwear for likes? Do we teach 3 year olds to say cuntasaurus? Do we share details of our 13 year olds periods and video our husband rummaging through her knicker drawer? Do we sit on lives talking to strangers and ignore our children's phone calls numerous times? Do we allow our teenager to smoke weed in the house and then broadcast it to paying followers? Do we ignore children in our care after an accident that need medical attention because they have broken bones? Do we dump our children on anyone that will have them so we can go away for the night? Do we encourage strangers to approach our children to say hello? Do we leave a 2 year old alone in his bedroom most of the day so he can spill paint, play in the toilet, eat fire lighters or stick his fingers in a fan? Do we have a never ending stream of 'aunties' 'big sisters' and fake grandparents getting attached to our kids, only for them to wonder where they went 12 months later when they have been branded toxic and unsafe? Do we have 5 out of 6 kids all with their own trauma and/or behavioral issues? Do we laugh when our 17 year implies she'll be taking cocaine on a night out?
No we don't Rach. so who is it that really needs to think about their children?
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Sausageface
Chatty Member
If Clemmie Hooper didn’t lose her job over her racist comments and the associated stuff, then I highly doubt the NMC are going to care if Sharon from A&E writes on here that she thinks Rachaele’s skirt looks naff.
Aunt Sally
Well-known member
The saying all the gear but no idea is epitomised by that pair of imbeciles.
It doesn’t matter how much money they have, what they spend it on, it’s all just one big failure, because they are uneducated crass talentless failures themselves. They have no style or class and it shows in everything they do.
They purchase expensive cookware yet can’t cook even basic meals, the latest being cottage pie.
They spend an absolute fortune on clothing yet they both look like a pair of idiot chavs with absolutely no style whatsoever. He’s a cross between Kevin & Perry and Roy Cropper, she’s a mix of Su Pollard and Vicky Pollard.
She pays a fortune for Invisalign yet ends up with Shergar teeth.
She drives to Bath for a £250 haircut and looks like Ivy “black roots” Brennan
Expensive make up but ends up looking like Aunt Sally ( arrrrh my tattle profile is insulted at the comparison
)
Massive interior redecoration on house yet it looks like some tacky pub chain refurb
Domestic Abuse saviour yet she’s an abuser herself
The list is endless…
And we are apparently jealous of that? Deluded the pair of them!
It doesn’t matter how much money they have, what they spend it on, it’s all just one big failure, because they are uneducated crass talentless failures themselves. They have no style or class and it shows in everything they do.
They purchase expensive cookware yet can’t cook even basic meals, the latest being cottage pie.
They spend an absolute fortune on clothing yet they both look like a pair of idiot chavs with absolutely no style whatsoever. He’s a cross between Kevin & Perry and Roy Cropper, she’s a mix of Su Pollard and Vicky Pollard.
She pays a fortune for Invisalign yet ends up with Shergar teeth.
She drives to Bath for a £250 haircut and looks like Ivy “black roots” Brennan
Expensive make up but ends up looking like Aunt Sally ( arrrrh my tattle profile is insulted at the comparison
) Massive interior redecoration on house yet it looks like some tacky pub chain refurb
Domestic Abuse saviour yet she’s an abuser herself
The list is endless…
And we are apparently jealous of that? Deluded the pair of them!
Bennington12
Well-known member
do you know what is heartbreaking Nikki hun?
Hearing a 3 year old wondering around alone thinking his family have gone and no one going to comfort him. Being treated as an inconvenience every single day and left alone for god knows how long to entertain yourself. Your mum literally saying she misses the days when you wasn’t her
Having a 13 year olds private life splashed about so she then gets bullied and when she’s upset about it she gets laughed at
Taking two young boys away from their mum and completely excluding them from her
Watching an innocent children have their entire lives broadcasted knowing that this will affect them for the rest of their lives
A 16 year old desperate for his fathers attention just pushed away
I could go on and on chick but as you have such double standards and cannot see the irony in your comments it would be a pointless exercise. I can see why you want to be buds with Rach. You’re two peas in an awful pods (fyi that isn’t a compliment!)
You can't hide now
VIP Member
Why are none of the adults that surround him stepping in. Hannah, Josh's mum, Jo...any fucking one of them will do. Someone needs to give her a slap and point out that Wilby can talk. He holds fucking conversations. He can name every single dinosaur and animal. He knows how to tell the dinosaurs apart, he told her last week he knows because it has small horns. He understands instructions, can get his point across very well and is far more switched on and intelligent than his thick as fuck parents. He's made friends at nursery. All the professionals think he is ready for mainstream school, without 1 to 1. But because that doesn't fit her agenda, she is just carrying this farce on. I can't believe that not even one person is pulling her up on this shit now.
They should all be fucking ashamed of themselves.
Wotsit
VIP Member
Just going to leave this here.
Because I can.
www.alankerrltd.co.uk
Huns....remember this £55k next time she tells you they can't afford private health care for Helen and you offer to set up a go fund me
Because I can.
Used Cars for sale in Paignton, Devon | Alan Kerr Ltd
Check out our Used Cars for sale in Paignton, Devon at Alan Kerr Ltd here now
Huns....remember this £55k next time she tells you they can't afford private health care for Helen and you offer to set up a go fund me
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FridaK
VIP Member
Just to note, the out pouring of support for Wibble on here in the past two hours has been unreal. Every single post has had something quite lovely and encouraging to say about him and his little path.
Tell us again Rachael, who is slagging off your kids and dangerous? Who is spouting hate? Who is a "selfish fucker?" Whose kids are affected by their Parents talking online? Go on, say it again, send people here to see our supportive and concerned comments. I'm sure they will be thrilled at being lied to so often.
Tell us again Rachael, who is slagging off your kids and dangerous? Who is spouting hate? Who is a "selfish fucker?" Whose kids are affected by their Parents talking online? Go on, say it again, send people here to see our supportive and concerned comments. I'm sure they will be thrilled at being lied to so often.
You can't hide now
VIP Member
1. I don't believe that 7 kids aged about 4 were left with no adult supervising them, doing woodworkSorry for the randomness Of this, I’ve been away so just caught up with this on patreon. It was after she went to visit the school W was accepted to.
firstly just imagining all these 4/5 year olds doing ‘woodwork’ unsupervised!
secondly wouldn’t it be great for W to have that communication and interaction with his new teachers, imagine how much he’d come on!
…so R has said on patreon today she’s holding him back a year, coz she can’t have that can she?!
2. Wilby CAN FUCKING TALK!
3. Wilby has made friends where he is now, so why wouldn't he make friends somewhere else?
4. Wilby knows who is his sisters are and can say their names?
5. Wilby doesn't need a 1 to 1 as he's doing really fucking well.
6. WILBY CAN FUCKING TALK!
7. Get a grip you fucking moron, Wilby isn't going to make you a fortune as a non verbal child that you can sell for content because HE CAN TALK! Let it go.
8.
chickenshopcharlie
VIP Member
Just while we’re quiet tonight, the latest review makes good reading…
Attachments
Hamiltonshats
Active member
Tell my boss, she's also on here so I doubt she'd give a shit
Motherhen24
Well-known member
Managed 30 seconds. Turned off as soon as she said he can’t talk. My 2 young children are both actually nonverbal. No words, they don’t copy sounds, and they certainly don’t know the names of every animal and dinosaurSorry for the randomness Of this, I’ve been away so just caught up with this on patreon. It was after she went to visit the school W was accepted to.
firstly just imagining all these 4/5 year olds doing ‘woodwork’ unsupervised!
secondly wouldn’t it be great for W to have that communication and interaction with his new teachers, imagine how much he’d come on!
…so R has said on patreon today she’s holding him back a year, coz she can’t have that can she?!
I might never hear my children’s voices 
the pure rage I feel inside of me when she says stuff like that I could actually bash my own head through a solid wall
DipsyDoodle
VIP Member
Thanks to @VickyVodka for the thread title 
Last thread recap:
- Rabies is, as always, a ginormous cunt
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- Joshua Marshall was dismissed without notice from Devon and Cornwall Police for improperly accessing the police database, and using a false identity to contact members of the public.
- poor old Cunty Carol has caught Wilby's conjunctivitis (no doubt during one of his meltdowns when he's been headbutting her). Apparently "pink eye" and piles feel exactly the same, apart from where they are on your body. They've "argued every day with every kid" (except the ones that don't live there). Isaac was going to the cinema with his cousin and some friends, took Rabid's debit card to buy some sweets, and spent £59. Tell me your stepchild has no concept of money, without telling me etc. Despite Rambo and Wibble both having conjunctivitis, they're going out for the day. Bit of moaning about Seb drinking orange juice out of the bottle and cleaning his trainers with the dishcloth.
- off out for the day with only one of their children, to a farm park place, where they had to ask a staff member to let them out through a back gate so that Wibbler didn't see the "shop full of dinosaurs" and have a meltdown. Joyce's head still seems to be attached to his body, well done to the surgeon who reattached it so well you can't even see where it was "sliced open". They had to spend "90%" of the day sat on the floor because all Wobbly wanted to do was go back to the toy shop.
- later, on PatreCON, Not a PC NoBalls was rummaging around in Lula's bedroom commenting on the mess, while Fungus Flaps filmed him while laughing and reminding him what his therapist said ("don't own it").
- as predicted, poor old Conjunctivitis Clare now has it in both eyes. Luckily she was able to drag herself into a too-large pair of jeans, some hideous trainers, and what looks like a Mulberry scarf to go out for the day, just her and Sloshua. How nice for the "mama of loads of kids" to have so much time away from all of them! They got a steam train (a snip at £44) followed by a ferry, to go and have an expensive roast dinner. Luckily every business in Torbay takes fresh air as payment, what a relief, they didn't have to find the £75 minimum (not including drinks) for their lush meal.
- back at the murder mansion, Joyce thought he was salt bae throwing salt over some prawns (probably an undeclared and, seeing as they were from the company Doormat Jo's partner works for). Dickhead Dave told Seb that if he ate the prawns, he couldn't come and sit in the lounge.
- desperately trying to prove that Isaac hasn't actually moved out, Rashflaps shared a photo of Gangsta Granny with Seb, Isaac and Edie. Unfortunately, GG, Isaac and Edie were all wearing exactly the same outfits as they were in the last photo of them, from several days ago.
- Facebook Freda's back, posting a long, rambling tale of how she's not waiting up to find out where Wilbert's going to school, because Bratsy didn't get the school she wanted and she's turned out just fine! Yep, a post about Wilby turned into a vomfest about the favourite child anyway, she clearly did stay up, because in the morning a screenshot of the offer showed it had been taken at 00:09 (even though it had the wrong date of birth). Her post says that he didn't get offered a place they had put on the list or viewed. That's the next couple of months' content sorted then, moaning about that
- many, many, many videos of reciting The Gruffalo with Wilbert
- on PatreCON, Rambo claims that TDAS have stopped delivering the Freedom course, and have referred all their ladies over to the Snatchwork Shitshow. She also feels that she's not giving enough to Patreon, and some people say that she's "giving more to PTWM". She's back writing on Facebook (yeah, we noticed). She wants to get back into advertising because she's "been really shit with that". More like you got cocky about how much you could make flogging your own shit through the tat shop and REBL
she wants to get back to it because it's where her income comes from WHAT ABOUT THE 16 GRAND A MONTH YOU'RE TAKING ON PATREON, EG RAQ? Apparently every month Jo tells her they're not going to make the wages. She needs PTWM to pay for Snatchwork (basically, don't you dare stop subscribing and buying my tat, otherwise you may as well be abusing women yourselves). She read the acknowledgments on her first book, and "half the people on there turned out to be absolute cunts hahaha". For reference, the list is: Josh, Tallulah, Edie, My boys, John, Matt, Sammy, Aunt Marg and Uncle John, Nana Ethel, Lianne, Han, Mummy Marshall, Jo, Mel, Bex, Leila, Kate, Kel, Josephine, Han, Keith and Net, Elsie, Mia, My nieces and nephews, Gayle, Tracy, Simone, Stace, Emma, Dave, My crew, Gabriella. She apparently got "a business loan" for Ethel's £8k vet bill, which she hasn't paid back yet. I wasn't aware you could get business loans to pay personal expenses 
and at the time she said that Jo was transferring the money from the PTWM account so I would assume that rather than a "business loan", she actually borrowed the money off her own business account, which isn't the same thing
- maybe the Educational Psychologist Rancid claimed to be meeting has told her she needs to start playing and interacting with Wilbob, without the camera in front of her face. So instead she set it up in his room and played dinosaurs with him. Very awkward, talking in a monotone voice, basically acting like she's never met him, let alone played with an almost 4 year old
she managed to end the session by saying "oh shit, the bath" as if she'd left it running. Sure, Jan.
- the book tour/meet and greet/arse kissing session in Totnes hasn't sold out yet, quick huns, get your tickets!
- in the hobbit loft, Rancid came on because she's had so many messages asking how she got on with the Educational Psychologist. He said that Wilbert has developed loads since the report done when he started preschool last year (well duh, he's spending time learning and being interacted with, instead of left alone in his room with an iPad). He's not going to get an EHCP, which Ratchet is gutted about probably because it doesn't fit with the "non verbal, level 3 autistic" story she's been pushing for the last 18 months. They're going to look at the school that was allocated to him because they haven't looked at it at all, but of course when the Torbay Tart emailed them they were "really lush". She then tried ever so hard to push out some tears, but none were forthcoming. She's "never been here before", as all her other kids were able to tell her if they weren't happy. Despite the fact Wilby wanders the house saying "where is my family, I'm lost" he has an NHS diagnosis so will get some SEN support. She was worried that he'll just leave his preschool and then she'll rock up to a brand new primary school and just leave him in September. She seems to think that transition meetings and sessions are a special provision just for the son of the Torbay Saviour, when having already had 3 children before, she'd KNOW that all schools do this he "doesn't cope well with new places" even though he's out at a different restaurant for his dinner every night of the week 
it sounds like the Ed Psych has given them a lesson in very basic parenting, giving the child simple choices to help them cope and feel like they're in control. Hard to believe that the gruesome twosome have produced 5 previous kids between them and don't already know things like this. Anyway, back to BV Barbara and how all this effects the most important person - herself. She's made friends with a couple of other mums (even after she swore she'd never make any friends ever again because of previously choosing "unsafe" people) and she was hoping the kids would go to school together and she could use the other mums as unpaid childcare. One of her biggest chrolls is from the school playground she reckons she hasn't really done the school run since 2019 because of the chrolls (but we thought you said you strutted into the playground like Beyonce not giving a fuck?). Edie's "never had a mum that's picked her up and dropped her off"
- a quick guilt trip on Bratsy for not ringing "the third time since you've been away we've gone 24 hours without me hearing your voice, let's not let this become a regular thing" AKA I'm funding your extended holiday and don't you dare forget it imagine being 18, pissing off to travel around another part of the world, and your mum whinging because you didn't call her one day. Let the poor fucking girl just live her life for once.
-
Running total of overnight breaks away since Joyce started his career break on 15 June:
Night at Herpes Lodge (midweek)
Night in Exeter (Saturday)
Night in London (midweek)
July:
Joyce's birthday - one night at Boringdon Hall (midweek), then two nights (Friday and Saturday) in a lodge in Cornwall with Arsetrid and Simon.
October:
Herpes Lodge (weekend), night in London (mid week in half term), Friday night in Southampton
November - 2 nights in London (Sunday and Monday)
December - 5 nights in Jubai
January - 1 night in London (Miss Greedy's book launch)
February - 1 night in London after dropping Betsy at the airport
March - 1 night in Birmingham (book signings)
If you are new, please read the wiki (pink button at the top) and if you are in need of support or advice in relation to domestic abuse, there are some links and helplines listed at the bottom of the wiki page
Last thread recap:
- Rabies is, as always, a ginormous cunt
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- Joshua Marshall was dismissed without notice from Devon and Cornwall Police for improperly accessing the police database, and using a false identity to contact members of the public.
- poor old Cunty Carol has caught Wilby's conjunctivitis (no doubt during one of his meltdowns when he's been headbutting her). Apparently "pink eye" and piles feel exactly the same, apart from where they are on your body. They've "argued every day with every kid" (except the ones that don't live there). Isaac was going to the cinema with his cousin and some friends, took Rabid's debit card to buy some sweets, and spent £59. Tell me your stepchild has no concept of money, without telling me etc. Despite Rambo and Wibble both having conjunctivitis, they're going out for the day. Bit of moaning about Seb drinking orange juice out of the bottle and cleaning his trainers with the dishcloth.
- off out for the day with only one of their children, to a farm park place, where they had to ask a staff member to let them out through a back gate so that Wibbler didn't see the "shop full of dinosaurs" and have a meltdown. Joyce's head still seems to be attached to his body, well done to the surgeon who reattached it so well you can't even see where it was "sliced open". They had to spend "90%" of the day sat on the floor because all Wobbly wanted to do was go back to the toy shop.
- later, on PatreCON, Not a PC NoBalls was rummaging around in Lula's bedroom commenting on the mess, while Fungus Flaps filmed him while laughing and reminding him what his therapist said ("don't own it").
- as predicted, poor old Conjunctivitis Clare now has it in both eyes. Luckily she was able to drag herself into a too-large pair of jeans, some hideous trainers, and what looks like a Mulberry scarf to go out for the day, just her and Sloshua. How nice for the "mama of loads of kids" to have so much time away from all of them! They got a steam train (a snip at £44) followed by a ferry, to go and have an expensive roast dinner. Luckily every business in Torbay takes fresh air as payment, what a relief, they didn't have to find the £75 minimum (not including drinks) for their lush meal.
- back at the murder mansion, Joyce thought he was salt bae throwing salt over some prawns (probably an undeclared and, seeing as they were from the company Doormat Jo's partner works for). Dickhead Dave told Seb that if he ate the prawns, he couldn't come and sit in the lounge.
- desperately trying to prove that Isaac hasn't actually moved out, Rashflaps shared a photo of Gangsta Granny with Seb, Isaac and Edie. Unfortunately, GG, Isaac and Edie were all wearing exactly the same outfits as they were in the last photo of them, from several days ago.
- Facebook Freda's back, posting a long, rambling tale of how she's not waiting up to find out where Wilbert's going to school, because Bratsy didn't get the school she wanted and she's turned out just fine! Yep, a post about Wilby turned into a vomfest about the favourite child
anyway, she clearly did stay up, because in the morning a screenshot of the offer showed it had been taken at 00:09 (even though it had the wrong date of birth). Her post says that he didn't get offered a place they had put on the list or viewed. That's the next couple of months' content sorted then, moaning about that - many, many, many videos of reciting The Gruffalo with Wilbert
- on PatreCON, Rambo claims that TDAS have stopped delivering the Freedom course, and have referred all their ladies over to the Snatchwork Shitshow. She also feels that she's not giving enough to Patreon, and some people say that she's "giving more to PTWM". She's back writing on Facebook (yeah, we noticed). She wants to get back into advertising because she's "been really shit with that". More like you got cocky about how much you could make flogging your own shit through the tat shop and REBL
she wants to get back to it because it's where her income comes from WHAT ABOUT THE 16 GRAND A MONTH YOU'RE TAKING ON PATREON, EG RAQ? Apparently every month Jo tells her they're not going to make the wages. She needs PTWM to pay for Snatchwork (basically, don't you dare stop subscribing and buying my tat, otherwise you may as well be abusing women yourselves). She read the acknowledgments on her first book, and "half the people on there turned out to be absolute cunts hahaha". For reference, the list is: Josh, Tallulah, Edie, My boys, John, Matt, Sammy, Aunt Marg and Uncle John, Nana Ethel, Lianne, Han, Mummy Marshall, Jo, Mel, Bex, Leila, Kate, Kel, Josephine, Han, Keith and Net, Elsie, Mia, My nieces and nephews, Gayle, Tracy, Simone, Stace, Emma, Dave, My crew, Gabriella. She apparently got "a business loan" for Ethel's £8k vet bill, which she hasn't paid back yet. I wasn't aware you could get business loans to pay personal expenses and at the time she said that Jo was transferring the money from the PTWM account so I would assume that rather than a "business loan", she actually borrowed the money off her own business account, which isn't the same thing - maybe the Educational Psychologist Rancid claimed to be meeting has told her she needs to start playing and interacting with Wilbob, without the camera in front of her face. So instead she set it up in his room and played dinosaurs with him. Very awkward, talking in a monotone voice, basically acting like she's never met him, let alone played with an almost 4 year old
she managed to end the session by saying "oh shit, the bath" as if she'd left it running. Sure, Jan. - the book tour/meet and greet/arse kissing session in Totnes hasn't sold out yet, quick huns, get your tickets!
- in the hobbit loft, Rancid came on because she's had so many messages asking how she got on with the Educational Psychologist. He said that Wilbert has developed loads since the report done when he started preschool last year (well duh, he's spending time learning and being interacted with, instead of left alone in his room with an iPad). He's not going to get an EHCP, which Ratchet is gutted about
probably because it doesn't fit with the "non verbal, level 3 autistic" story she's been pushing for the last 18 months. They're going to look at the school that was allocated to him because they haven't looked at it at all, but of course when the Torbay Tart emailed them they were "really lush". She then tried ever so hard to push out some tears, but none were forthcoming. She's "never been here before", as all her other kids were able to tell her if they weren't happy. Despite the fact Wilby wanders the house saying "where is my family, I'm lost" he has an NHS diagnosis so will get some SEN support. She was worried that he'll just leave his preschool and then she'll rock up to a brand new primary school and just leave him in September. She seems to think that transition meetings and sessions are a special provision just for the son of the Torbay Saviour, when having already had 3 children before, she'd KNOW that all schools do this he "doesn't cope well with new places" even though he's out at a different restaurant for his dinner every night of the week it sounds like the Ed Psych has given them a lesson in very basic parenting, giving the child simple choices to help them cope and feel like they're in control. Hard to believe that the gruesome twosome have produced 5 previous kids between them and don't already know things like this. Anyway, back to BV Barbara and how all this effects the most important person - herself. She's made friends with a couple of other mums (even after she swore she'd never make any friends ever again because of previously choosing "unsafe" people) and she was hoping the kids would go to school together and she could use the other mums as unpaid childcare. One of her biggest chrolls is from the school playground she reckons she hasn't really done the school run since 2019 because of the chrolls (but we thought you said you strutted into the playground like Beyonce not giving a fuck?). Edie's "never had a mum that's picked her up and dropped her off"- a quick guilt trip on Bratsy for not ringing "the third time since you've been away we've gone 24 hours without me hearing your voice, let's not let this become a regular thing" AKA I'm funding your extended holiday and don't you dare forget it
imagine being 18, pissing off to travel around another part of the world, and your mum whinging because you didn't call her one day. Let the poor fucking girl just live her life for once.-
Running total of overnight breaks away since Joyce started his career break on 15 June:
Night at Herpes Lodge (midweek)
Night in Exeter (Saturday)
Night in London (midweek)
July:
Joyce's birthday - one night at Boringdon Hall (midweek), then two nights (Friday and Saturday) in a lodge in Cornwall with Arsetrid and Simon.
October:
Herpes Lodge (weekend), night in London (mid week in half term), Friday night in Southampton
November - 2 nights in London (Sunday and Monday)
December - 5 nights in Jubai
January - 1 night in London (Miss Greedy's book launch)
February - 1 night in London after dropping Betsy at the airport
March - 1 night in Birmingham (book signings)
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FridaK
VIP Member
I think it's far too reductive to say people come to this thread or any other on here because of jealousy. There are many reasons and each of us will have our own.
Mine is pure morbid curiosity. I'm caught up in a cycle of watching her do heinous and idiotic things, but keep getting away with it. It's bafflingly addictive.
savethelastdance
Chatty Member
How can one woman get it so wrong all the time?! 
