I would never up my game, if he’s not satisfied with what he’s got i would leaveI’m in a happy long term relationship but I totally have a crush on an older guy who is a bit of a wanker (which I think adds to it!)
And if my bf ever told me he fancied someone else I would damn well up my game to remind him why he’s with me!
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I'd be really interested in the age of the people who say yes. No judgement because we're all anon and who cares anyway since it's hypothetical, but I would have probably said yes in my 20s and maaaybe part of my 30s but it would be a big no way for me now. Not because I'm past it, but there's too much history and trust to be broken by my age. Doesn't matter about not being found out. I would know and I don't get enough sleep as it is so I don't need another thing keeping me awake.if you could have a one night stand with someone you fancied, nobody would every find out...
would you do it!?
anyone brave enough to say yes
Literally meDoesn't matter about not being found out. I would know and I don't get enough sleep as it is so I don't need another thing keeping me awake.
If I do anything wrong I end up telling on myself anyway
I said yes and I'm 31, been with my husband 10 years.
I started this thread, I now spend several hours a day pretty much every day with the man in question and can honestly say now I know him there's no attraction
I started this thread, I now spend several hours a day pretty much every day with the man in question and can honestly say now I know him there's no attraction
Oh don’t get me wrong if it was serious feelings for someone else I wouldn’t be begging anyone to stay, I’d be putting on some Lizzo and cracking open some Rose! But if it was just a harmless crush, I’d help him forget about them quickly
I’d say it’s absolutely normal. I also find that at certain times of the month my hormones go berserk and I fancy everyone who even walks past me!
This is exactly it, I’ve had crushes before and they always fizzle out once you realise they aren’t this fantasy person you thought they were!I started this thread, I now spend several hours a day pretty much every day with the man in question and can honestly say now I know him there's no attraction
My husband works away a LOT and we both have really busy lives. I find that once he is home any ‘crush’ I thought I had seems to just fizzle out. I think it’s totally a hormonal/psychological reaction.
I think it's totally normal. Theres men I fancy and women I'm sure my husband fancies. But it doesn't bother me at all because I feel its natural and I trust him. I dont know that anyone gets together with a partner and expects them to never look at other people again?
As for the fling I'd be a strong no. Although no one would find out I would know and I couldn't handle that. I'm in 30s.
As for the fling I'd be a strong no. Although no one would find out I would know and I couldn't handle that. I'm in 30s.
Crushes are normal. I've got one at the moment but I'd never act on it.
The reasons are: 1) first and foremost my personality, I have to have strong emotional connection to enjoy sex, which means by the time I got to wanting to, I'd be feeling in love and it would get messy, fast.
2) Also, my kids are old enough to understand that someone is moving out and why. I couldn't put them through that without breaking them and myself in the process.
3) I have good sex already, I wouldn't be gaining much.
4) I'm tired and work is hard enough without avoiding a particular department because I've tit on my own doorstep.
Advice? Have a nice 10 mins to yourself every now and then with the shower head until it wears off and you go off him..and get on a date night asap with the guy you really love.
Bet you, when some sparks fly between you for a night, the crush guy takes up less headspace.
Have a hug. Being an adult sucks. xx
The reasons are: 1) first and foremost my personality, I have to have strong emotional connection to enjoy sex, which means by the time I got to wanting to, I'd be feeling in love and it would get messy, fast.
2) Also, my kids are old enough to understand that someone is moving out and why. I couldn't put them through that without breaking them and myself in the process.
3) I have good sex already, I wouldn't be gaining much.
4) I'm tired and work is hard enough without avoiding a particular department because I've tit on my own doorstep.
Advice? Have a nice 10 mins to yourself every now and then with the shower head until it wears off and you go off him..and get on a date night asap with the guy you really love.
Bet you, when some sparks fly between you for a night, the crush guy takes up less headspace.
Have a hug. Being an adult sucks. xx
Yup. Totally normal. I’ve had many
Totally fine to look in the windows, just don't go in and spend any money! A commitment doesn't mean that you are blind to what else is out there, just that you choose not to act.
I think this is spot on!I have recently became single and there’s been a few guys that have been flirting with me but I think to myself “do I actually fancy them or do I just like the attention?”
I've been with my husband 10 years, we have two children, one who is a poorly and spends alot of time in hospital, my husband works away and I'm a stay at home mum, there's no doubt we love and adore each other but we are very much stuck in routine and the children come first, so when this dad at the school started talking to me as me not as the stressed out mum/wife it was flattering. (I'll add he wasn't flirting, he's happily married too)
I think for me the reason I have a crush on this older guy, especially when I’ve never been into older men before, is because I’m at that age now where people are starting to expect me & my partner to have children and I’m just not ready, in fact I’m actually terrified by the thought of having children there’s still so much I want to do! Men are ok when they split with women they can just swan off but women are always left with the children and I really don’t want that to happen to me.
An older guy whose been there & done that wouldn’t expect kids from you - in my fantasy world anyway!
there’s still so much I want to do! Men are ok when they split with women they can just swan off but women are always left with the children and I really don’t want that to happen to me.An older guy whose been there & done that wouldn’t expect kids from you - in my fantasy world anyway!
Its perfectly normal to find someone else attractive but I would say 'having a crush' as such is more than simply thinking someone physically looks hot. When genuine feelings of fancying them and them being affected emotionally by someone else comes into question then in my opinion you are verging on a morally grey area. Though a little different when it comes to a celebrity you are likely to never meet or have any chance in hell of acting on.
Yep and when feelings start you can start to question your morals. I find the whole crush thing really distressing personally.
Agreed, I mean there are lots of people who I would say are attractive women or that they look hot but I would never use the term having a crush or that I fancied them. I just recognise them as being good looking physically, not involved at any kind of emotional level and no thoughts of anything other than they look good.
I would be so hurt, Infact jealous but yes I would be tempted if nobody ever found out and I really fancied the person...but life the pops in my head and remember I wouldn’t be able to live with the guilt and wouldn’t like it if it was done to me. So hey ho as temped ad I’d be I think I’d always (I think) resistQuestion for everyone, not just the original poster:
Throw it on it’s head....
if you found out your husband really fancied someone else and was thinking about them, would you be hurt?!
ans since were all anonymous.
if you could have a one night stand with someone you fancied, nobody would every find out...
would you do it!?
anyone brave enough to say yes