Niomi Smart #35 if this is the year Forky will propose, Nimbobs will say yes in the flamingo pose

[LolitaBlah]

HAPPY NEW YEAR NIMBOBS TATTLERS!!! 🦩🦩🦩🦩🦩🦩🦩

First new thread of the year! and what a year!! We went from thread 16 to 35 with A LOT of new members!! yoohoo!

As for our favorite Nimbecile, she had quite the year too:
- she isn't an influencer anymore, she is a (read with the most pretentious accent you could do please) "content creator"
- veganism is not her thing anymore
- still not over Dreamy Joe (duh!!), while mister perfect is still banging Anna Banana
- she is still trying to convince the world that she is as fun and wild and crazy as Anna Banana but who, is, she, kidding!!
- Her hair is fried and wild...
- She had Covid because her vaccine "has expired" and it was a total mess
- She bought a house that looks more like a shed... which turned out to be the reality of it.. she didn't spend more than 10 consecutive days in this new house
- And the event of the year, the introduction of the one and only, the biggest man spreader, the wildest Trump supporter, the man with the biggest ego and tiniest.. brain.. Forky!! also known as Dick Van Fork, also known as Bradley Simmonds, Fitness prodigy and God's gift to the thin-blond-rich females of instagram! The is-he-isn't-he dating 1-million-followers-Niomi-Smart! The man that eats sushi with a fork and spells potato.. potatoe. For people who need a visual:

That's our year recap guys!! Might I remind you that we have a NiomiMoodScale that you can use to describe your feelings in this thread?

Title thread by @strawb Please vote on the poll...

Oh moooooooon!!

 

[judgejohndeed]

I find it so funny that after she broke up with Joe she kept posting all that stuff like 'never be with someone who dull your sparkle/holds you back' and has then proceeded to show us the worst version of Niomi we've seen to date...like if Joe was 'holding back' this version of Dimbobs, I think he deserves a medal for community service tbh.

 

[ECH]

I have to be honest with you guys...after having Feel New tea in my advent calendar, I've bought a lot more and I can't stop drinking it. I am starting to sympathise with Niomi's shock at Joe not wanting a cup. I fear that soon I will be looking out the window waiting for smoothie bowl weather to arrive. Please send help.

 

[sydneybarrett]

Regina George writing in her Burn Book

 

[mg95]

Following trump does not equate to being a trump fan. I used to follow that bafoon for entertainment purposes

Liking tweets by the Trumps equates to being a fan though. His most recent like is a transphobic tweet by DJT Jr. Second most recent is about how children shouldn’t be taught white privilege. Another recent one about Dr. Fauci being a fraud. One before that about black on black crime and how Labour MPs and BLM activists should worry about that. Another from Nigel Farage about him going to the US/Mexico border “unlike Kamala Harris”. Another about the gov of Florida going on an anti mask rant saying he’s going to be President some day. Another saying Boris was the best choice for PM. Another tweet in support of Gina Carano who was fired from Star Wars for comparing being a Republican to being a Jew in the Holocaust.

Should I keep going??

 

[irvinelane]

If Joe saw Niomi now would he even recognise her?!

Joe seeing Niomi’s new look be like:

 

[sydneybarrett]

Think we know who is Niomi's hair inspo:

Squint your eyes a lil bit and you'll see Niomi:

 

[AnnaMel]

Joe`s response to all of Niomi`s "subtle" insinuations.

 

[sydneybarrett]

Thread title suggestion:
On her deathbed still talking 'bout Joe, Niomi please just Let It Go!

(didn't come up with this, just combined what was already mentioned here)

 

[Ms.Marble]

Or eat what you want always and every day.... Just a suggestion...

 

[getawaywithit]

Following trump does not equate to being a trump fan. I used to follow that bafoon for entertainment purposes

He follows others like Megyn Kelly and was following or liking typical anti mask stuff a while back.

Guys, he is a classic douche. He has a giant picture of himself in his bedroom ffs, and he goes around pontificating about that toxic ‘fitness’ rhetoric about how if you really ~wanted~ to be fit and had the will do to so you would, etc.

I mean, how low is the bar for men that ‘likes his family and dog’ affords you ‘good guy’ status lol.

 

[Tea&Toast]

Imagine having sex with someone who has a giant shirtless photo of themselves next to the bed it must be there to help Forky get an erection

 

[Michi]

I’ve never seen more soulless eyes. Holy shit.

I have. Tanya Burr.

 

[dutchover]

1. He's not Joey.
2. He eats sushi with a fork.

Anyone want to add to the list? Haha!

I don't hate Forky but I do think his behaviour is very cringeworthy at times (the trip to Paris, for example). He does provide us with endless entertainment all the same - and Nims seems to have fun with him too. I say 'seems' because her laughter when she's with Forky often seems very forced for whatever reason.

HE WON'T TEXT ME BACK WHEN IN THE COMPANY OF OTHER FEMALES

Liking tweets by the Trumps equates to being a fan though. His most recent like is a transphobic tweet by DJT Jr. Second most recent is about how children shouldn’t be taught white privilege. Another recent one about Dr. Fauci being a fraud. One before that about black on black crime and how Labour MPs and BLM activists should worry about that. Another from Nigel Farage about him going to the US/Mexico border “unlike Kamala Harris”. Another about the gov of Florida going on an anti mask rant saying he’s going to be President some day. Another saying Boris was the best choice for PM. Another tweet in support of Gina Carano who was fired from Star Wars for comparing being a Republican to being a Jew in the Holocaust.

Should I keep going??

People criticize me for calling him a white supremacist but if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck...
My family is Mexican.
I'm married to a transwoman.
These aren't jokes to me, nor light issues.
The hardest people to wake up are those pretending to be asleep.

 

[Lovemeabitoftea]

Lil’ different

 

[sydneybarrett]

NOOO, you shouldnt have deleted it! It was gold!!! Plus that passive-agressive expresion in her face

Repost!
(changed it to dairy in your honor )

 

[Coldfeet]

How can someone who eats *mostly* vegan, support Pigeon hunting?!

Isn't it 'clay pigeon ' shooting? They're not birds. Just flying discs.

 

[slipperfluff]

Same bedsheets

It’s such a sad, bachelor bed. Crumpled sheets and flat crap pillows. Doesn’t look inviting at all. Also his carpet is really stained at the foot of the bed.

 

[palmer]

Who remembers when she vlogged about having a bad day and it turned out that she had missed her bus stop? Yeah... so you can imagine what “bad news” means to her then

 

[QueenBW]

I hate that I'm having compassion for our Nimbecile but the more I think about it, the more it seems like she's seriously depressed. Obviously can't actually diagnose her from here, and I'm not a psychiatrist, but she's exhibiting many depression symptoms, like using drinking as a crutch, clearly not enjoying things she used to enjoy (like during her trips, she looks so empty. She's lived a vapid life the whole time she's been on YT, but she'd never looked so dead behind the eyes during her many, many trips), inability to care for things she used to care about (like veganism despite it likely being a facet of an ED for her, or sustainability even if it was a shallow interest). She just doesn't seem to enjoy anything lately. Even when she's with Forky, receiving some male attention, she still looks empty.

It'd make sense why she would be saying she feels like slowing down during a time when most people are full of resolutions/plans if she were depressed. When you're going through a depressive episode, the smallest things feel like mountains, you have no joy or excitement for things.

Yeah, she's a privileged twat who has always thought that a couple of meetings were a hard day of work but I think we've all seen a change for the worse in her over the last few months, even somehow worse than right after the Dreamy Breakup. Like, her skin is shit, she looks bloated, even her hair looks fried beyond the blond dyeing harm, and she overall just has no spark.

I rarely wish people ill - I reserve most of my ill wishes for asshole politicians, murderers, and animal abusers- and I don't wish Niomi ill, so I really wish she'd go to a licensed psychiatrist. Not just a wishy washy "coach" or "therapist" that got their qualifications off the internet. There's nothing wrong with enjoying tarot, crystals, facials, massages, pilates, etc but they're not enough many times and she seems to be hitting new lows.

Anyway, going to remind myself of how much she sucks to end this compassionate episode