When you’ve been burnt badly, it’s so hard to start again. Even with time and therapy. Share your experiences of how you successfully managed to date and trust men again after a brutal divorce or break up. Would love to hear some positive stories as well as those that need advice themselves.
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Got together with my ex in my teens. He cheated, got someone pregnant, who didn’t go on to have the baby. I then got pregnant, had the baby, found messages to another girl he’d been sending while pregnant about meeting up with her… broke up when baby was here, carried on sleeping together for 3 years, when he had girlfriends, I remained single. 3.5 years later, met the most amazing man, who is now my husband and 7.5 years later, we are married, we have children together with another on the way. I never would have expected to be where I am 11 years ago 
Ah that’s amazing.Got together with my ex in my teens. He cheated, got someone pregnant, who didn’t go on to have the baby. I then got pregnant, had the baby, found messages to another girl he’d been sending while pregnant about meeting up with her… broke up when baby was here, carried on sleeping together for 3 years, when he had girlfriends, I remained single. 3.5 years later, met the most amazing man, who is now my husband and 7.5 years later, we are married, we have children together with another on the way. I never would have expected to be where I am 11 years ago
Thank you! And he is one of the best, and can never do enough for all the kidsAh that’s amazing.
The ex is still in my eldest life, and we get on well. I thought all trust in men would be destroyed, but I have 100% trust in my husband and would never question or doubt him
Thank you! And he is one of the best, and can never do enough for all the kids
The ex is still in my eldest life, and we get on well. I thought all trust in men would be destroyed, but I have 100% trust in my husband and would never question or doubt him
That's lovely to hear
I was married for 20 years when I found out my husband was cheating on me, I felt like I'd been hit by a truck that was how shocked I was, I didnt expect it I thought we were happy, in a good place but obviously not. I filed for divorce as he worked away a lot and I couldn't trust him anymore plus I felt sick every time I looked at him
Anyway we stayed friends for the kids sake about a year after we divorced he passed away. That was four years ago and I haven't dated anyone since as I really can't break that wall down to trust anyone ever again, one day who knows.
You met him on Tinder too? Wow, that’s amazing. Good luck with the thesis. Mine feels like it will never be finished!(Ex obviously) of 5 years cheated on me on a work night out with someone who had only just joined the company... 2 days after my grandad who was like my father died fairly suddenly.I couldn't even break up with him because I needed the support. To add insult to injury he was living with his parents still and he took her back to theirs?! They were like my family I thought but they tried to cover for him at first! I didn't really forgive him though and he ended up breaking up with me shortly after.
ANYWAY 6 months on he was begging for me back which I politely declined... unfortunately the trauma of it all left me an easy target for a narcissist and I quickly jumped into a short abusive (emotionally and eventually physically) relationship. He also broke up with me when he moved (doing me a massive favour). I had some therapy, had a lot of terrible dates, made some amazing friends and decided that I never wanted to be in a relationship again!! Like seriously I think I was picking awful men to date subconsciously to make sure I stayed single!
Fast forward and I'm super happy with my boyfriend of 4 years saving for a house deposit just about to submit my PhD thesisI don't even know how it happened, I was so shut off to the idea of ever trusting anyone again after two horrible experiences - cheating and abuse. But tinder and my now bf had other ideas and I know for a fact he would never hurt me.
I know how hard the thought of ever trusting anyone is though.
I hope we both do.That's lovely to hear
Erm well…I keep delaying and I’m only part time, so 6 years! I also write for a living so it’s all I do!
Really glad to hear you turned your life around so positively. I’m only two years post heartbreak, but I’ve picked myself up from rock bottom so I’m certainly moving in the right direction. I met him on Tinder, so can’t see me being as lucky!
I was in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship (on one occasion) of 2.5 years. I couldn't do anything, even with my own sister, without being accused of stuff. Ruined me to the point I was nothing like I used to be and had hardly any friends as he cut me off from them all and made me doubt I could do anything good. Finally broke up with him a few weeks after the physical incident.
A few months later I started messaging a boy I knew of from school. We've now been together 4 and a half years and are soon to complete conveyancing on our first house together
he hypes me up in every single thing I do and is worlds apart from my ex.
A few months later I started messaging a boy I knew of from school. We've now been together 4 and a half years and are soon to complete conveyancing on our first house together
he hypes me up in every single thing I do and is worlds apart from my ex.I was with my ex for a long time, he was a regular cheater but I didn't find this out until we were breaking up. 9 years we spent together. I thought the absolute world of him. When he finished things with me I actually just wanted to die. That was 7 years ago and Im still broken hearted.
I dated alot intially after the break up, I think this was because I was craving validation. I never met anyone that I could see myself being with.
Then 3 years ago I met someone and I was hooked after date 2. He ended up being the worst possible narcissist. It was a horrific 3 years. I am a completely broken person.
I still talk to my first ex, I miss him every day and would happily get back with him.
I finally took the steps of seeking therapy because I know its not right that I allow men to treat me so badly.
I hope in time I will meet someone that I can love and trust, but I'm doubtful.
I dated alot intially after the break up, I think this was because I was craving validation. I never met anyone that I could see myself being with.
Then 3 years ago I met someone and I was hooked after date 2. He ended up being the worst possible narcissist. It was a horrific 3 years. I am a completely broken person.
I still talk to my first ex, I miss him every day and would happily get back with him.
I finally took the steps of seeking therapy because I know its not right that I allow men to treat me so badly.
I hope in time I will meet someone that I can love and trust, but I'm doubtful.