So not really much to update! I messaged him a little bit, but to be honest he didn't make enough effort and while I see it as a positive step that I had a crush on someone after breaking up with my ex (which I have accepted I am still quite sad about), I have learned the hard way that it is never a good idea to chase someone! I shall certainly never be doing that again. Actually writing this down is quite cathartic and empowering because I've had a bit of a weepy day today and letting the tears flow... but yeah, proud in many ways of how far I've come. Thanks for being lovely, guys.
- Notice
Aww thanks!!
Coffee is tomorrow!!!!! I'm really nervous. I'm 99.9% sure he's single... but need to be prepared in case that's not the case. I'm really hoping I didn't imagine the chemistry coz it knocked me for 6 and I haven't been able to stop thinking about him
Megansnarkle
VIP Member
Why not follow up with an email, and thank him for his time, maybe tell him about how it's helped your work and open the door for an in person meeting. 'If you ever have time and are in [town] I'd love to buy you a coffee to say thank you in person'? That way if he's interested he'll find time, if not it's no more than a professional courtesy.Can I contribute? I interviewed someone recently for work (not a job interview, a 1:1 chat). I've recently come out of a long term relationship that was on and off for a long time. Sad but no bad blood or anything.
Anyway I was utterly utterly taken aback at my attraction to this man!It was a video call so not even in person, but it has been absolutely YEARS since I felt so instantly attracted to someone. He's lovely, intelligent, interesting... I think single.
I work for myself so it's not like I need to tell anyone at work... I'm pretty sure there was a bit of flirting but hard to tell with what was a fairly formal conversation.
My question is... should I talk to him about it? Someone suggested trying to arrange another call but I dunno... feels a bit fake.
He's a bit older than me too but I don't care at all. I have a very very intense feeling about him. You know when you have the most mad chenistry with someone? I'm really hoping it isn't one-sided...!
Kaylarina
Chatty Member
Don't be scared! When I started my training after leaving med school there was an instant connection with one of the consultants. I never, ever thought anything could or would happen. We ended up chatting at some hospital function and the attraction just grew, but I still didn't think I had a chance!No, I don't think so... he's not a client or anything so think it's fine! I'm just really scared about telling him
Many 10+years later, we're still together, have 2 beautiful little girls and are moving to the other side of the world together!
You've got nothing to lose - go for it!
Thank you, this is a lovely lovely story!!! I'm so happy it worked out for you. I just felt this gut punch when it dawned on me that I really liked him. Came out of nowhere.
I'm pretty sure he's single and having spoken to people IRL and on here, I think I am going to pluck up the courage to ask him for a coffee next week! Eeeek!!!
Thanks so much! Thanks everyone for the support and encouragement
. I can't wait to see him againJust on the train now... got butterflies!Oh yes sorry I didn’t read properly it was tomorrow! Well good luck do update us on how goes! I’m sure you didn’t imagine it and you’ve got nothing to lose by giving it a shot
Rockin' Robin
VIP Member
Any updates?
Feeling a bit down so may be overly sensitive but as I had already accepted it wasn't going to work out, I don't think your comment was wholly necessary to be perfectly honest.
I met a long term ex through work, my parents met through work and are still together. I won't be seeking this kind of relationship again but to rule it out entirely i feel is a bit silly.
Woolmercardington
VIP Member
I'd just be mindful of the "stay in touch" part of his text - I'd interpret that as he's isn't going to follow anything up himself and has put the ball back in your court.
I just said 'hey XXXX! I'm in town next Thursday - do you want to go for coffee? C'
ada-lovelace
Chatty Member
Hey I’m invested in this! Did you go for coffee?
JodieGreen123
VIP Member
Woolmercardington
VIP Member
Well yes, that sounds more promising. You just don't want to be the one serving the ball all the time, is what I mean. Hopefully, he'll follow up soon.
Megansnarkle
VIP Member
Why is it inappropriate? Is he single? Is he in your reporting line? Would it be awkward in the future if something happened?
Lots of people meet people at work, but whether or not it's inappropriate depends on the circumstances.
Lots of people meet people at work, but whether or not it's inappropriate depends on the circumstances.