I am with my partner 20 years and I guess in the past 3 years things have just taken a turn for the worst..
I got sick with cancer 2 years ago which ended up me having to have a breast removed
I ate my way through the treatment I guess u would say and gained about 5 stone
we haven’t had sex in nearly 6 months
When I bring it up he gets mad and basically says it’s all I’m my head
He doesn’t touch me kiss me anymore
Never complements me or never takes any notice of me.,
Am I been unfair by wanting some attention I’m so unhappy it really starting to effect my mental health
what do I do? Do I leave I’m just stuck and don’t know where to go too
You are not being unfair at all.
You have been through so much, a cancer diagnosis & treatment plus having a mastectomy are huge, life changing things to deal with, and it’s only 2 years ago so it’s still all very raw id imagine. Of course it’s going to have had an impact on your body, your mental health and on your relationship.
Your husband will too have been going through a lot off the back of your diagnosis, treatment and all the changes that have happened in both of your lives.
can you sit down together and just talk - not specifically about sex to begin with, but about everything- will be open up to you about how your diagnosis has been for him? I think that’s the key - opening up an intimate dialogue about everything first, unpacking it all and starting to work through it. Tell him, calmly, that you love him and you are still keen to be in a physical relationship with him and ask how he feels - allow him to tell you how he feels and allow yourself to be honest with him, about how his actions make you feel.