Christmas haters

[Curlywurly85]

So glad I’m not the only one, people can be quite rude when you say you’re not a big fan. I don’t hate it and do enjoy some bits but I particularly don’t enjoy the monotony of it (it’s the same every year) and the commercialism of it. It’s no longer about good will and giving but greed and gluttony, it really brings out the worst in some people! I also have to see my bigot of a mother, I hope there would be tighter restrictions to save me from that one my husband doesn’t have any family and I only have my parents and brother so I do get a but upset when I see big families gathering. I do enjoy Christmas films, donating to charity, mince pies and mulled wine I’m definitely enjoying it more this year, after a crap year. I think as I’ve got older I’ve realised there is no set way to celebrate, just do what makes you happy. Sending love to you all

 

[under the ivy]

Can’t stand Christmas, it really triggers my MH. I always look into volunteering with the homeless or something as I find being in the house really bad. I wish the day away, I always keep busy by being the one to cook the dinner. I’ve got a younger brother so I always make it special for him but yeah, it’s a hard day. And the build up, don’t get me started…

 

[Rockin' Robin]

Christmas seems to start on September the 1st these days. Or at least the run up it does. By the time the day arrives, you are truly sick of it.

 

[Say What]

I am so glad someone made this thread! I’ve found when I’m honest about my hatred towards Christmas (and my birthday actually) people don’t take it seriously, so it’s nice to have somewhere to lay down my thoughts and feelings without judgement.

I really hate Christmas. I hate the commercialisation of it, the obligation to ‘have fun’, the fact it’s rammed down your throat, secret Santa. All of it.

I grew up with divorced parents and both were so focussed on their new families/partners it was never special for me. It was never that magical time of year that it’s supposed to be for children. I just remember arguments over who would have us and being pushed from pillar to post on the day. No child wants to wake up at their home, then be ushered over to their dads, to then be ignored because current partners kids were around, and dropped home late so your parents have yet another row on the doorstep. It was the same every single year.

When I became old enough to drive it was then suddenly on me to make the effort and now I spend most of my Christmas Day driving between houses but feeling in the way whenever I get there. Last year I refused to go to my dads (for various other reasons) and his solution was to drop my gifts on my mums doorstep. He knocked on the door and drove away. Didn’t even wait to see me.

I lived with my mum growing up and she tried to make it special but my step dad was difficult and would eventually start an argument and my brother and I would be sent to our rooms for some unknown breaking of a rule he made up on the spot.

Plus, the last three serious boyfriends I’ve had have always broken up with me shortly after Christmas so that hasn’t helped.

I just dread it. It’s always felt like a time of pain for me and every year feels like it gets worse. If I could, I’d go to sleep Christmas Eve and not wake up until Boxing Day.

You’re on my wavelength about Christmas but obviously for different reasons. I also hate my birthday and go to great lengths to hide it from as many as possible which people think is weird. I don’t get why I should celebrate another year of getting older. Usually I end up reflecting on the year gone by, often negatively and end up feeling like crap. I’m quite happy to celebrate other people’s birthday but I’d rather ignore mine if I’m honest

 

[Itsalwayssunny]

I'm not a Christmas hater but thought would put my opinion in for the sake of it
I am liking Christmas more and more as I get older, even now two thirds of my children are adults I am still loving it. Dont get me wrong I can not abide the commercial aspect of it all, I also refuse to do anything for Christmas until December, it really grates on me when people start blithering on about it in September.
But for me it just feels special. I love the things we do during December, going to cut our tree down together, taking my daughter to the ballet, visiting father Christmas and lunch with my mother in law, Christingle service then meeting my husband in the pub for a mulled cider, choosing gifts people will enjoy rather than just throwing money at people. Then Christmas eve collecting the turkey from the butchers, a nice long walk, the crib service at church with the children then home for Chinese and Christmas films, getting the sitting room ready for the morning then off to midnight Mass.

What I can NOT STAND is people that take photos of their mountains of gifts with #spoilt.

 

[Saddlesoap]

Quite interesting reading through this thread. I am slowly being to dislike Christmas more and more.

I think it's the work politics and the fuss everyone makes about having to be at work or on call that's really winds me up tbh. They have all chosen this career, and we can't be off. It's not even like we are shop workers and need to be in at the crack of dawn. We do get the bank holidays off, unless it's your turn on duty and that doesn't happen that often!

I love buying gifts. I really try to be practical about what I buy and avoid 'tat' that will just end up in a cupboard.
I enjoy buying the tree and decorating the house
Christmas dinner is fine, but it's just a glorified Sunday lunch. Christmas parties, meh. The TV is shite!

I would love Christmas to be like when I was younger, going to my Grandma's for 11am and seeing all my cousins and aunts/uncles. Then the family would come round to ours in the evening. We would eat SO much I honestly don't know how my mum did it. We'd play card games, watch TV that I remembered being good. Boxing day would be similar.


My husband and I wanted to do something different last year, so we ate on Christmas Eve and then chilled out all Christmas Day. This year we are going to go for a walk in the lakes and take a flask of boozy coffee or some prosecco. I would love that to be a tradition for us.

 

[Itsmerahrah]

We are getting close to ‘the time’

 

[Buffy]

I wish it was once every 4 years like a leap year I could just about cope with that!!

 

[265]

It’s over ! Another year done

anyone else feel this way?

It's not over till the Turkey runs out....

 

[rainbowlemon]

I’m dreading Christmas this year, I can’t afford it for one, I split with my ex husband just before last Christmas & we agreed to tell our kids we had split up after Christmas but he had other plans & told the kids Christmas Day we had split up (he was still living in the house, sleeping separately) he told the kids it was me seeing someone else as well when it was actually him, he ruined it for them them & they will never forget & I just feel so sad for them still to this day! I literally have no money & I’m devastated for them I really am, I know it’s not all about money but nowadays it feels like it is, so much competition all the time.

How old are your kids?

Honestly as they get older they will understand everything you did for them, which will be more important then not getting as many gifts as their friends or neighbours.

 

[Kezza_69]

Im sure I start saying how much I dislike Christmas every year when its rammed into your face from September onwards. .
I then give myself a little talking to, tell myself off for being a misery and "try" to get in the "spirit"
A day with the in-laws is far too much for me, they're boring, they're argumentative, they THINK they know everything and they are ALWAYS the last to leave . .
Im categorically NOT doing it again next year, I get absolutely no pleasure from the whole experience and quite frankly am always relieved to get it over and done with.

 

[mcfeez]

I don't think I'm an outright Christmas hater but certain things have made me come to feel negatively about it.

I hate the family politics of it all. My MIL is incredibly bitter about how time is split between families and my in laws are very uncompromising. Equally my mum also puts "her Christmas" ahead of everyone elses and both sides forget we are a family ourselves and have to split our time between each side. My husband and I try to travel at this time of year actually to a) take advantage of the extra leave and b) avoid the family nonsense.

I also really really hate the financial pressure people feel put under. Its absolutely insane that people themselves into debt over a holiday! My mother has next to no money and insists on buying me gifts every year. She owes me over 500 quid and has 0 savings and she doesn't see an issue with it because "its Christmas!" I literally couldn't care less about receiving presents.

 

[Easilyannoyed]

I like Christmas but I draw the line at trees and decorations up before December I make loads of effort for peoples presents and no one is ever that thankful that really pisses me off I don’t even want anything back just thank you! I’ve made a rod for my own back because when I try and just buy minimal things seems expected I will go all out because I have a decent job. Every year I say this year I’m not buying a lot and then I end up buying loads I need to learn!

 

[Hurrah54]

So glad this thread exists!!
I really really struggle in the darker months and find it hard to cope.
I hate that by 1st September, consumerism says summer is over and bombards you with Christmas shite 3 months early.
I don't mind Christmas, although I think the pressure of it gets ridiculous and I do think it's just a way of covering up how shit winter is...

I've also found that people who put their trees up very early, end up taking it down on boxing day etc because they're sick of the clutter!!

 

[rainbowlemon]

I don't hate Christmas loved it when I was a kid, now it's just become a reminder of what I don't have. Spent last year in tears and wishing the day away alone.

 

[rainbowlemon]

They are 24, 18, 15 & 10, my youngest is also a Christmas Day baby too & I have a grandchild as well x

You're proving them with a loving home and somewhere they can actually feel safe. That means a lot more then £££ items.

But maybe you could get something for the 10 year old+ grandchild only and smaller food items for the others?

 

[ClockworkDolly]

Am I the only person who can't stand the film It's a wonderful life? I tried watching it once, but became irritated with it fairly quickly. Or am I just being a Scrooge?

It is overrated. Watched it once, once was enough.

I have a love/hate relationship with Christmas. I have spent many Christmasses by myself, not through choice and that has made me feel very unloved. Conversely, I have spent Christmas with the wrong people and wished I was alone. I hate the image that the media portrays about Christmas. We are fed a lie. For many it is an incredibly lonely and depressing time, far from being inclusive, often quite the opposite.

I do enjoy exchanging cards though and I love listening to Christmas carols, although many of them are so beautiful, they often make me cry, especially the ones sung by the Choristers at King’s College, Cambridge.

I must say I am usually glad when Christmas is all over.

 

[Raininvain]

They are 24, 18, 15 & 10, my youngest is also a Christmas Day baby too & I have a grandchild as well x

All old enough to understand that if you cant afford anything much then so be it. Just have the meal which you can do really cheaply.X

 

[Never in the World]

I also think Xmas is shite esp when there’s no one in the house that believes so we had been using the time to have a holiday abroad though last year we spent it doing a Xmas package in a hotel in York and it was bloody brilliant they kept feeding us lovely food and between meals we’d have lovely walks around York I think it was my favourite ever Xmas

 

[slabber]

Christmas has never been the same for me since my parents separated and I think since I got into a relationship. It's the obligation of having to spend it with family then deciding where to go and who you spend it with/don't spend it with. I'm not particularly close to my family and I feel you're never completely at ease with in laws so either way, it's always an effort. I'd rather "eat and be merry" just the two of us in our own home with minimal fuss.

Also the pressure of buying presents that no one wants or needs, just because you feel like you have to. It's so crap.

And this year is worse than normal because of Covid.