Make sure no family or friends mention it either on theirs, even if your page is private an they leave comments an there's isn't it can still all be seen, chances are if anyone you know has a public page he will keep a eye on it, creeps like that will also look for a way to find information
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Keep a log of every contact he has with you, write it down and if he makes threats, make sure you have screenshots and records of them
Good that you’ve changed your number, have you had any calls/contact since you changed it?
Honestly what a freak
Good that you’ve changed your number, have you had any calls/contact since you changed it?
Honestly what a freak
No calls as it stands. I’m still a bit worried at the thought of him coming to find me or finding my number which might be irrational but will probably ease in time
I’m just thinking about the next time he calls and gets ‘the number you have called has not been recognised’ hoping it doesn’t send him in to some blind rage.
I can only imagine how scary this is, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I would also suggest going through all your social media accounts and completely privatizing them (if they are not already private). Go through your followers and remove anybody you do not know personally/anybody whose account who may look a bit suspicious and could be anybody completely random. If you have a Facebook make sure you set everything to friends only, even extremely old posts! Basically make your profiles almost invisible to non friends/followers. Don't want him being able to track where you are or where you could be. If they are deranged enough to pester you, you don't know what else they could be capable of. The best thing you can do is limit anyway he could find you, stay alert (get a rape alarm), I would also consider cctv for your new property, that way if anything happens you can force the police to do something about it because you will have video footage.
Hope everything goes alright for you and the change of number will be the end of it., but in my opinion you can't be too careful with people like this.
Hope everything goes alright for you and the change of number will be the end of it., but in my opinion you can't be too careful with people like this.
I spoke to the police this morning. It has been filed as a domestic dispute, so now if he is searched on the national database there will be 2 allegations of harassment down for him. I chose this as opposed to going to court straight away as with the change of number I am hoping he goes away. She said if there is 1 more attempt to make contact I can get in touch with NCDV and get a restraining order, and then if there's anything else following that he is more likely to be prosecuted for breach of a restraining order as opposed to a harassment order.
This sounds a bit similar in ways to my situation.
So I was seeing someone very briefly in 2017/2018.. it was awful, he was a total control freak and it was always his way or no way so it all came to an end and he left me alone. However, when he realised I wasn't going to run after him - he started to bombard me going down the super friendly route or then when he got no response going down the feel sorry for him route. I eventually met my now partner in May 2018 and as soon as my 'ex' if you could call him that so lets call him 'Pete' (not his real name) - As soon as Pete found out well he started to really increase the calls/texts. It would be hundreds of texts a day, essays about how much of a slut I was, then essays about how much he loved me, then essays about how he would kill himself if I didn't get in touch because he had nobody, then essays about how I was a fat mess. He decided to contact my boyfriend through all forms of social media, he contacted my boyfriends mum and called her a slut. He contacted members of my family including my own brother who is super Christian and pretended he wanted to turn good living and go to church with him! He told me he was ending his life so I called the police who went and visited his address to check on him where they found he was absolutely fine. I lost my best friend to suicide 10yrs ago so for him to pretend he was going to take his life was just horrible. He would create fake emails, fake twitter accounts, fake instagram etc and send messages through there. I went to the police numerous times but each time it would be ''Change your number'' ''remove all your social media'' ''we can't say anything to him until he has actually done something'' - My mental health took such a nose dive. I was constantly looking over my shoulder. Telling my boyfriend not to post where we were etc. He manipulated a few 'friends' of mine too and fed them lies but thankfully most people saw through it all because of the hundreds and hundreds of screenshots of abuse I had. It's been 4 years now and I still live rent free in his head, I've been told he still watches my social media like if I change my profile pic or if I post on twitter which is my only public social media - I don't post anything super personal on there and I certainly don't post my whereabouts until I am not actually there anymore such as talking about a good restaurant I've been or something. He hasn't contacted me in a few weeks but I don't think he has gone for good - Usually find when he is quiet he has got someone new and usually when it doesn't work out he comes back and tries to play pity party with me via email but I ignore him each and every time even though I am so angry I have allowed it for so long. I think its absolutely vile and disgusting with some of the things he has said to me over the years and just expects me to be ok with it. I remember telling him 4 years ago how hurtful he was being, how his words were just disgusting but he ignored me and continued. I shouldn't have to change my number, I shouldn't have to live my life like a hermit but slowly and surely I am gaining confidence again.
Stay strong OP, don't give in to him and give him the attention he obviously craves cause each time you do he thinks its ok to keep contacting you. Narcissist is all he is.
I am so sorry you are going through this but I hope things get a bit better for you just try & nip it in the bud now, don't converse with him in any way shape or form xx
So I was seeing someone very briefly in 2017/2018.. it was awful, he was a total control freak and it was always his way or no way so it all came to an end and he left me alone. However, when he realised I wasn't going to run after him - he started to bombard me going down the super friendly route or then when he got no response going down the feel sorry for him route. I eventually met my now partner in May 2018 and as soon as my 'ex' if you could call him that so lets call him 'Pete' (not his real name) - As soon as Pete found out well he started to really increase the calls/texts. It would be hundreds of texts a day, essays about how much of a slut I was, then essays about how much he loved me, then essays about how he would kill himself if I didn't get in touch because he had nobody, then essays about how I was a fat mess. He decided to contact my boyfriend through all forms of social media, he contacted my boyfriends mum and called her a slut. He contacted members of my family including my own brother who is super Christian and pretended he wanted to turn good living and go to church with him! He told me he was ending his life so I called the police who went and visited his address to check on him where they found he was absolutely fine. I lost my best friend to suicide 10yrs ago so for him to pretend he was going to take his life was just horrible. He would create fake emails, fake twitter accounts, fake instagram etc and send messages through there. I went to the police numerous times but each time it would be ''Change your number'' ''remove all your social media'' ''we can't say anything to him until he has actually done something'' - My mental health took such a nose dive. I was constantly looking over my shoulder. Telling my boyfriend not to post where we were etc. He manipulated a few 'friends' of mine too and fed them lies but thankfully most people saw through it all because of the hundreds and hundreds of screenshots of abuse I had. It's been 4 years now and I still live rent free in his head, I've been told he still watches my social media like if I change my profile pic or if I post on twitter which is my only public social media - I don't post anything super personal on there and I certainly don't post my whereabouts until I am not actually there anymore such as talking about a good restaurant I've been or something. He hasn't contacted me in a few weeks but I don't think he has gone for good - Usually find when he is quiet he has got someone new and usually when it doesn't work out he comes back and tries to play pity party with me via email but I ignore him each and every time even though I am so angry I have allowed it for so long. I think its absolutely vile and disgusting with some of the things he has said to me over the years and just expects me to be ok with it. I remember telling him 4 years ago how hurtful he was being, how his words were just disgusting but he ignored me and continued. I shouldn't have to change my number, I shouldn't have to live my life like a hermit but slowly and surely I am gaining confidence again.
Stay strong OP, don't give in to him and give him the attention he obviously craves cause each time you do he thinks its ok to keep contacting you. Narcissist is all he is.
I am so sorry you are going through this but I hope things get a bit better for you just try & nip it in the bud now, don't converse with him in any way shape or form xx