I want to preface this by saying I'm not Paul and have never met the man. I'm chiming in to give some perspective as another man playing the sugar game. Background, I'm early 50s, slightly younger than Paul, and been part of the sugaring scene for several years.
Some of you have asked what SA is, and that's the Seeking Arrangement 'dating' site. Of late, due to lockdown, there's a lot of girls joining, having been fed a line by some bullshitter on YouTube or TikTok who's looking for likes & subscribers, or even marks to buy their course on how to land a Sugar Daddy (SD), telling them that SA is stocked with older guys, all lining up to throw money at younger women, for nothing more than the pleasure of their company & conversation (online no less). However, these girls soon drop out when they discover the reality of the site.
Let's be clear, Seeking Arrangement is sex-work. Someone said it's escorting-lite and that's as good a description as any. A lot of the girls on that site are either on their way up to becoming a full-blown escort, or on their way down from it. At best, it's escorting dressed in pretty paper with a bow on it, which allows the girls to escort without having to feel like an escort. There's a social dance to making an arrangement, and the number one rule is not to trigger the feeling that she is an escort, so SA comes with its own vocabulary and euphemisms that both sides observe.
For me, I don't like to be made to feel like a 'John' to use the American parlance for a hooker's client. There is a difference between an escort and a Sugar Baby (SB). A SB will not have been with a dozen men before she meets you, and a dozen more yesterday (maybe the McSorley twins excepted). She won't be hardened or jaded. She'll just be the pretty, or beautiful, girl on social media. Just a normal girl. It's a 'date' and I like it to flow that way with dinner, drinks, just as per normal dating. But it's a sure-thing of course, because that's been agreed beforehand. I've had had one back out, couldn't go through with it, broke down over dinner and said so. I was heartfelt for her, I didn't like to see her like that, and told her to forget it. Told her she could leave and no hard feelings, or stay and finish her meal and not worry about "after" as it wasn't happening, and the money was still hers. That's the only instance I've had like that, however. Usually, when they have cold feet you just get stood-up and blocked on all apps. I've sat at dinner many a time on my own, and it happens a lot. It happens to women on SA a lot, too. There's a great deal of time wasters on both sides of the fence.
There's been a lot of ridicule and hate for Paul for partaking of this, but he's never pretended to be an angel. In the sugaring world it's often not all that clear cut who's using who. At best, it's what it says on tin: a mutually beneficial arrangement. She gets want she wants, and you get what you want. Bayley says it on her own profile, "Be straight forward with what you want". A similar bluntness is to be found on thousands of other girls' profiles.
And there are thousands of them. The reality of being a man on any other dating site is that you're lucky to get a response, regardless of what age bracket you're in and aiming for. Women have an entirely different experience on dating sites, so tend to find it hard to believe that for men, online dating is by and large fruitless and frequently soul destroying.
Take Tinder for instance: the majority of men are lucky to get a handful of matches a month, even less replies from them. On SA, all that is turned on its head. Whereas the ratio of men to women on traditional dating sites is something like 20:1 (and some estimates put it at 50:1), on SA that is completely reversed, and it's the one site that the older you are, the more that works in your favour (as younger men aren't as financially successful). It is an absolute candy-land of young and beautiful women, and if you're a guy, then for the first time in your life you're about to experience what it must feel like to be the pretty girl at the party: your inbox will explode and just about every intro message you send will be replied to - and politely. All those girls you who swipe left on you on Tinder and never match with (and why would they at their age), a lot are on SA and suddenly knocking on your door.
That's the head-fuck of it. SA is stocked with all the same girls you see on Tinder and social media, girls that you'd never imagine were "at it". It makes you look at women a whole other way, and not necessarily in a good way. For that reason I have to take frequent breaks from the SA carnival as it starts to affect my 'normal' relationships with women, and not positively. SA is highly addictive but it's also easy to become jaded because of it.
But back to those girls, and taking Bayley for example: what man wouldn't do a double-take at her on the street and not wonder what it takes to get with a woman like that? Especially a middle-aged man. Before sighing and laughing at the very idea.
Well, I'll tell you: it takes anything from £200 - £1,000 to get with a 'Bayley'.
Depending on where you are in the UK, rates vary. London is typically around £500, further north less at £200/£300. That can be for a few hours or overnight, and that's determined before meeting. Of course that's averages, and for the very best looking women you have to spend more. For instance there's a woman complaining at the start of Bayley's original thread that she looks comparable to her and Millie and most she ever got was £700. That rings true. However, many times you'll be surprised by what's asked: that same influencer who typically wants five figures, well, if she's got nothing on at that particular moment and finds herself cash-strapped, then she'll fuck you for £200.
Understand a lot of these girls are terrible with money. You see the bags and holidays etc, but they're like gamblers, either flush with cash or dead broke. There doesn't seem to be an in-between. She's may have a Range Rover but hasn't got £5 to put in the petrol tank.
Maybe the biggest surprise to you all will be the issue of unprotected sex - it's fairly common. That shocked me at first, how cavalier these girls are, but many do not give one damn. Of course some ask to see certs etc, and that's reasonable, but a lot don't. I'm not talking about the sort of skanks Bayley looked like in her younger years, but again, those perfectly sweet and nice looking girls you see on social media that I spoke of earlier. For some it's a hard 'no', but for many it's just a case of spending a little more, or maybe nothing more, as they prefer sex that way.
What's no surprise is that the vast majority of the girls on SA are there for money, but there girls on the site who just want the "spoiled girlfriend" experience. These are the girls who are going through an older guy phase or curiosity, and want the "lifestyle" aspect more than the cash. These are the girls who are looking to be looked after, fine-dining, luxury breaks, shopping etc rather than cash itself, and it's more of a traditional relationship, just minus ever meeting any of her friends or family, or going anywhere she's liable to seen with you. To play that sort of SD, though, does come with the requirement of still cutting somewhat of a dash, as that's the Richard Gere/Pretty Woman thing she's looking to get out of her system, and the size of your wallet isn't the main factor for these girls (but make no mistake they still won't interested if you're a broke postman who happens to be a Richard Gere look-a-like).
But for most it's about the cash, and if it comes with the "lifestyle" aspect too, so much the better, because it's not a necessity. You may think it's £500 (or whatever) to fuck her upstairs in your room at the Ritz after dinner, but the reality is you can take many of them to Nandos and fuck them in Travelodge after. They don't care so long as they get the agreed PPM (Pay Per Meet), and even Nandos is optional.
Speaking of PPM, that's the most usual method of payment, not a monthly allowance. That's because most guys just can't afford an allowance. Most of the guys on SA haven't a pot to piss in, in fact.
Just like there's levels of SBs, there's levels of SDs. Paul is a whale. A guy like him is a rarity and Bayley hit jackpot with him. In comparison to Paul, I'm a Splenda-Daddy. To a 20yr old girl who's never really been anywhere or got any life experience, I'm a Sugar Daddy, but I'm not playing at Paul's level. Paul's Premier League, compared to him I'm 3rd Division. Compared to the guys out in Monaco, I'm lucky to be Sunday League.
I'm not putting myself down, but being honest. I put on good theatre and look the part, but Paul's the real-deal. I read Bayley saying Paul's driver ferries his SBs out to him. Me, I send a Wheely Chauffeur when in London. Used to have an account with a chauffeur company, but when Wheely came along it was more economical and saved me a few bucks. To the girl, it looks much the same, that's the theatre, but Paul's sending a Bentley he owns with a driver on his payroll, and I'm on the Wheely app sending a well-dressed taxi driver with his Merc.
At Christmas, I gave my closest the choice between a Rolex and a Cartier. She picked Cartier and I set up an appointment for us there, after first visiting to state my budget and make sure the watches presented to her were what I could afford, and I didn't find myself embarrassed. Nice gesture, eh? Except Paul can do that any day of the week, never mind Christmas, and the fuck with a budget. As I say, there's different levels in this.
Me and my SB, we'll fly to the same destinations as Paul, but him and his will be sitting in first class (or on his own charted jet) and I'm in business class. Me and Paul will be in same hotel, but he's on the top floor in a suite, and I'm several floors below in an executive or club room. We'll eat in same restaurants but I still look at the prices on the wine list, he doesn't. He can stay a month (or as long as he wants), me and my SB are going home end of the week.
And I can't house someone in Kensington and give them as much again in an allowance and gifts, or bankroll a couple months at the Palms along with all the toys. Very, very, few can. I just want to drive that home to understand the extent to which Bayley's fucked herself over here.
It's highly unlikely Bayley will ever find another Paul. These threads are the first to come up searching her name, and from now on in, she's on a downwards trajectory to £50 car park meets, haggling over anal or not. That slide may take her a few years, but that's the ticket she's punching now.
I think part of the reason Paul is acting like he is, isn't about power or controlling anyone, but because he sees Bayley headed the same way. It looks to me like he cared for her, offering her rehab in London for her drug issues, and it's because he cared for her and sees that same end station for her, that he's reacting the way he is. So cut him a break. He was really generous towards Bayley and she never wanted for anything. She was hardly used like she is by Tex and his mates, fed drugs and exploited. It looks like Paul didn't even seen Bayley all that often, and going by those WhatsApp chats, it was all "yeah no problem" to whatever she asked for (£50k bracelet aside, but that's understandable). Sure there's an "agreement", you know when the money runs out so does the SB, but it's easy to get sucked in and forget that at times. You spend time around people, you catch feelings. It's called being human. I might be the only one, but I felt for Paul because I got conned badly myself several years ago, and probably would've flipped in exactly the same way he has.
Paul's not hurting anyone. He's not married unlike most (wannabe) SDs and it's his money so he can spend it how he wants, and he seems to be generous toward the women in his life. I saw that YouTube vid of him too, and it looked to me like he was sending himself up as much as anything, just having a laugh: he owned Loaded, so why not enjoy himself with it?
Re getting called "daddy", someone said it's a Dom thing. Maybe, but for a lot of girls, they get off on calling you that. I don't like it, but as I say, for some girls it's part of the fun for them and like to do it. I prefer if they don't, but it's part of the whole thing for some of them, I roll with it. It's a two-way street of fun after all.
Bayley, I've never met. I'm not really too au fait with social media so wouldn't recognise her as a 'personality' if she is, but I do remember her profile, or at least a profile featuring her photos. It was around Sept/Oct last year and we may have exchanged messages, I can't recall, and it may not have have even been Bayley behind that particular profile, because there a lot of scam profiles that steal pics and use them. However, I can assure you that a lot of Instagram girls are on SA and despite what they may claim, the girl in the profile pic is the same one you're speaking to.
I'll stop here. Rip me a new one or ask away if you've questions. I'll end on a quote from a book I read many years ago. Cynical perhaps, but something I think best sums up the SB/SD relationship, and one Paul's had a nasty reminder of (as I did). It's from 'The Way of the Wiseguy' by Joe Pistone (Donnie Brasco), the chapter entitled 'Wiseguys Have No Friends':
"Wiseguys spend twenty hours a day with each other, play pool and deal cards with each other, go to each other’s weddings and kids’ birthdays, hug and kiss each other like great friends. But they are not friends. Being someone’s friend means trusting them and sharing your deepest thoughts and fears with them. In the Mafia, you cannot afford to be that vulnerable. You cannot afford to have friends.
Naturally, wiseguys grow close to each other. I certainly shared some laughs and had some fun with the wiseguys I knew. But I never, not for a moment, thought of them as friends, not because I was FBI and they were wiseguys but because wiseguys themselves do not think of each other as friends. They are friendly but not friends. The term ’friend’ has no meaning, when at any time, you may be asked to blow the head off a guy you’ve known and liked for years.
Friends are good for one thing in the mob: they can be counted on to kill you when your number’s up."
Same applies to 99% of Sugar Babies: the term "friend" in "girlfriend" has zero meaning.
...on her own....with one little eye 
