Awful new neighbours! Help!

[Roastielover]

I don’t know where to turn really so putting here for advice.

We had new next door neighbours move in about 2 months ago. We live in a semi, Victorian type so our halls are next to each other. They have two young kids.

Basically my eldest started being woken up around 4-4.30 each morning. She moaned a lot but we thought, you know, it’s a young family with young kids.
But it started getting worse and worse, kids screaming crying, like nothing I’ve heard.

Now the dad has started kicking off too, he doesn’t shout at the kids he ROARS at them, speaks awfully to them. We can hear EVERYTHING. We have figured that he’s left alone with them Fridays and that’s the worse day, The way he shouts at them is heart stopping, it’s giving us all anxiety and making us all very sad.
That with the gut wrenching screaming crying from the youngest kid we are at our wits end with it.
We never hear anything nice, no praise, no love just nastiness.
I never hear the mum either but know that she’s there, although she is out a lot.

Does anyone have any ideas? I’m pretty scared to tell you the truth but the anxiety that it brings is really getting us all down. We are such a chilled family. I’ve never heard either of my kids scream like these kids do! And if my fella spoke to my kids like he does he would be out!!

xx

 

[hogwartsgraduate]

Is it bad enough to contact some help would you say? Perhaps a phone call to social services or do you know the school the children attend?
It may help how your feeling if something is said to someone at the least.
Sounds awful

 

[Ahahha]

I really do know what you are going through okay i don't have a man shouting at his kids but I do have an elderly man shouting at everything my advice is if you can get out do I am been honest here I had to deal with this for 3 years and council mp care have been no help at all.

 

[Dianne]

Is it possible to try and soundproof your child’s bedroom? Or maybe white noise? I really feel for you. There’s a family a few doors down from me and the dad is the same. Makes me so anxious. It’s so horrible hearing abuse like that. Could you strike up a conversation with them and try and drop in that the walls are thin? When I lived in a flat my upstairs neighbour said ‘if the tv is too loud let me know’ which I thought was a good subtle way of saying please keep your tv on low. Though now and again we’d hear her having loud sex. If only I had the money for a detached home!!

 

[Lola123]

This happened to me (my bedroom was next to the boys room) and I eventually got used to it but had to warn people when they came round, see if you can buy your kids a sleeping headband that has headphones in and then worst case they can play some quite sounds etc

 

[Whatevesmate]

Aside from the suggestions about dealing with sound that other people have made I would contact NSPCC helpline to report my concerns about the children. If it's making you and your family feel anxious I dread to think what impact its having on those children

Good luck dealing with this horrible situation.

 

[Tublet83]

I would phone social services - if it’s scaring you imagine how the children feel

 

[skintsocks]

If it's loud, it's not how you would behave, and it is causing you concern for the children, phone social services. You are not doing anything malicious, you are potentially helping the children. Do not feel bad about making the call. It's better to make a call that results in nothing/no concern, than to not make the call at all.

 

[Roastielover]

Aside from the suggestions about dealing with sound that other people have made I would contact NSPCC helpline to report my concerns about the children. If it's making you and your family feel anxious I dread to think what impact its having on those children

Good luck dealing with this horrible situation.

That’s exactly how we feel! The poor kids!

Thank you everyone x

 

[Thelife&times]

If you’re feeling anxious about reporting due to being a neighbour then can I suggest contacting the child’s school and speaking to the family support worker or Headteacher? I really do understand the anxieties of reporting a neighbour, especially when they can be very aggressive.

 

[Tublet83]

If you’re feeling anxious about reporting due to being a neighbour then can I suggest contacting the child’s school and speaking to the family support worker or Headteacher? I really do understand the anxieties of reporting a neighbour, especially when they can be very aggressive.

All reporting is annoymous X

 

[Sally1993]

If it was me, I would ring social services, NSPCC or police 101.

 

[Ahahha]

Here the thing you can report till your blue in the face but unless they hear it there selfs (social) ect they won't do a thing and even then nothing might be done unless you are in the situation you automatically think something would be done but in reality it's nothing like that honestly 3 years and a half iv dealt with my neighbour we have alot of proof what he is doing and still care doesn't do a thing and it's sad and alot of neighbour have tried to help one is even moving because of him care is washing there hands

 

[Whatevesmate]

Here the thing you can report till your blue in the face but unless they hear it there selfs (social) ect they won't do a thing and even then nothing might be done unless you are in the situation you automatically think something would be done but in reality it's nothing like that honestly 3 years and a half iv dealt with my neighbour we have alot of proof what he is doing and still care doesn't do a thing and it's sad and alot of neighbour have tried to help one is even moving because of him care is washing there hands

Your situation sounds distressing and frustrating but I think that this is different. A situation regarding concerns about the welfare of children would be treated seriously in my experience.

 

[ProphecyGirl]

Your situation sounds distressing and frustrating but I think that this is different. A situation regarding concerns about the welfare of children would be treated seriously in my experience.

Unfortunately not. In my local there's a family who numerous of people have reported and nothing it being done about it and it's serious allegation's against them too. Makes me so sad.

I would report it and keep reporting until a check has been done, document and recorded if you feel conferrable enough.

 

[Ahahha]

Unfortunately not. In my local there's a family who numerous of people have reported and nothing it being done about it and it's serious allegation's against them too. Makes me so sad.

I would report it and keep reporting until a check has been done, document and recorded if you feel conferrable enough.

This is why I have said what I have said they don't check they don't do there jobs properly and it's not them who is causing the trouble who gets made to feel like useless in the situation. I agree with you tho keep reporting it and keep records

 

[PineappleQueen19]

Regardless of what else you do, start keeping notes (if you haven’t already) even if it’s just date, time, what you can hear including words/phrases. That way whatever you decide to do, you’ll have your own evidence - something in your own handwriting that can be referred back to at any point.

How I think I would approach it is to think of the children next door. Without putting yourself and your own family at risk, how can you do the right thing by them?

My heart goes out to you - to not feel safe and calm in your own home, for reasons beyond your control, is just horrible.

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

Could you knock on the door and tell them the walls are thin and you can hear all the loud noises. Maybe they’ll keep it down

 

[Roastielover]

Could you knock on the door and tell them the walls are thin and you can hear all the loud noises. Maybe they’ll keep it down

we all want too but are too scared

 

[flutternutter]

Cannot stand parents who scream at their kids! There's a few like that in my street and its awful to hear but luckily we are attached to a normal family hah!
I would maybe try the suggestion above of saying can you hear us, sorry if we are loud or something like that. Try and be friendly about it. If they have no self awareness report them?