lily allen : Most liked Posts

Sandra_1984 said:

I'm not victim blaming at all here, but oh my goodness, why oh why do people put themselves into dangerous situations? Not just women, men too who will drink and then stagger home and end up getting mugged. Women who drink way too much and spend nights in beds with other people, completely passed out.
There always has and always will be some really evil people in the world who will take advantage of people in vulnerable situations. Sad

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Everything you’ve said is the whole definition of victim blaming. Everyone should be able to live their lives, wear what they want, get drunk, get taxis, whatever, without being under threat of being taken advantage of. It’s the perpetrators who need to change their behaviour, not the victims.

Phil Anne Throw Pee said:

I think our Lily has been having elocution lessons

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I think that’s her ‘real’ accent. She’s privately educated from an arty, middle class family but liked to pretend she was brought up on a council estate.

“Not a fucking terrorist though Miquita!”

Also the more I hear about Miquita’s childhood, the more I want to rage at Andi. I think Miquita has to tell herself the difficulties she experienced in childhood were due to poverty because that helps protect her relationship with her mum - to acknowledge that Andi actually holds some responsibility for Miquita’s neglect must feel very scary and destabilising, especially if Andi isn’t able to admit to any of that either.

They clearly still have a v codependent relationship and as much as I would love Miquita to break free from that, I don’t think I can blame her too much for still seeking and wanting the comfort of the only caregiver she had growing up. That’s pretty much what CPTSD is - when care and love always comes at a price and you have to somehow make your peace with that internally so that you can continue getting the care you need. It really fucks with you, especially when it starts in early childhood.

Miquita talks so casually about her mum letting random men sleeping in her room, calling round the fucking Groucho and whatever other bellend bars looking for her mum, the hitchhiking, being handed over to strangers as a baby, having loud sex when she knew M and her friends could hear etc. It really does sound like Miquita pretty much raised herself.

She’s clearly still afraid of losing her mum’s love because she can’t help but criticise and shame herself whenever she talks about arguments they still have and my heart breaks for her because it makes me think has Andi ever apologised to you Miquita???

Let’s be real Andi sold her 15yo - clearly already vulnerable considering how many schools she’d been kicked out of by that point - daughter into the entertainment industry, to improve her standing in that industry. I agree it’s frustrating that Miquita can’t acknowledge how nepotism got her Popworld, but I think part of that is that it was really Andi who built her career off the back of Miquita. She wasn’t “too poor to raise her” - poverty goes deeper than lack of income, it’s about lack of opportunities to build that income.

Andi always had other options to provide a more stable home environment for Miquita, but she chose to prioritise her lifestyle. Sending Miquita off to that popworld audition, instead of actually investing her time and energy into her clearly struggling daughter to find a way to help her finish school, is another example of shitty, selfish parenting.

Andi also deserves grace and understanding for whatever her underlying issues are. But my feeling is that Miquita is all too aware of how hard things were for Andi back then and has never had the space in their relationship to have her needs fully seen and appreciated. She gets a lot of flack here, which I’ve contributed to, but now that I’m actually listening to the pod my honest feeling is that the growth she has achieved is pretty impressive, all things considered. Same with Lily - to me they seem like two women who really are trying their best. A lot of the other people with threads here could learn from them both!

I don’t know what’s more annoying - the setup or the fact that everyone is LAPPING IT UP.

Here we have, *checks notes*, Lily Allen - the opportunist all-things-to-all-people narcissist playing the victim for being, *checks notes*, cheated on!?!?

The same woman who flippantly talked about cheating on the father of her children whilst he sobbed; same woman who slept with Liam Gallagher whilst he was married to an All Saint. The SAME woman whose autobiography essentially shrugged at all the pain she caused with her “that’s just the way I am” summary after each chapter. This same woman now wants to control the narrative once again by PLAYING THE VICTIM!?!?! Lolz

Lily has and will do anything to ensure she’s the topic of conversation. She’d livestream a colonoscopy if she thought it would bring likes. And now, because she’s been rejected and spat out - she throws out her narcissist rage and spills all the intimate details of a private breakdown of a relationship. It’s not cool to kink shame. In fact she has no shame.

They were destined to failure as a couple. Two raging- ego celebs whose only trajectory on the narcissist pyramid scheme is to marry, have a baby and then be slowly faded out by the machine. Real relationships take work and commitment - and when the attention fades one of the parties always seeks new limelight victims. Lily thought David could be her doorway to LA and Hollywood. And her crying over this BETRAYAL is because she isn’t used to being the dumped party. Her personality disorder centres on an entitlement around always being the centre of attention - no matter what the subject.

The album sounds like it was made in ten days. I’m amazed there isn’t a track telling you David’s email address and passwords and asking you to send him hate mail. West End Girl might as well be called Shameless Hypocrite.

ALSO: Sorry to those of you whose husbands have cheated on you and ruined your life. But make no mistake, Lily has ruined countless marriages including her own. She is a not a victim.

kissyfur said:

I think she has a lot of shame because despite these connections she only has popworld under her belt as a success. The fact that she was so young means she probably didn’t really appreciate it at the time. So she’s had her whole adult life as a bit of a failure career wise. I’d say it’s hard to feel you are a nepo baby when your career has been shit.

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Miquita's whole attitude reminds me of this

I think even the most outspoken confident person can be too scared or too traumatised to speak out after such an event. Also maybe she's feeling strong enough to speak about it now after cutting ties with certain people, or maybe through therapy to process it. Maybe profiting from her story actually helps empower her, taking the power back from her abuser. In that case good on her.

Private Eye getting into album reviews

D33pthroat said:

She’s entitled to feel hurt and upset and angry and behave how she wants privately. But this need to create victim/villain scenarios which she steadfast refused to do when shoe was on other foot only emphasises the points in this :

Narcissism and the Hero and Victim Complex

Swaying from the hero who is going to save the day to the most broken individual allows a person to evade accountability and fuel his or her own ego.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Tbh, lots of humans have narcissistic traits.

I don’t think she is a person with flat out narcissistic personality disorder or anything, nor that this was a pre calculated plan to be the “victim”. I think she’s just written an album about how she was feeling at the time.

Yes she has made mistakes in the past (and tbh been more honest about those mistakes then most people would have been. I’d have taken some of that shit from the Sam era to the grave personally).

Humans are messy af. And cheating isn’t at all rare unfortunately. But I do respect Lily for not pretending she’s been an angel for her whole life. She does make an attempt to own her mistakes. Yes her explaining why she did the things she did are often called excuses.

I think when she tries to explain why she might be the way she is (daddy issues, famous too young etc) people are quick to get the pitchforks out and call her a privileged nepo baby etc. But its not a game of hard life top trumps. Everyone’s experiences and reality are unique to them. People who appear to have everything can be deeply flawed as well. It’s not until something unfortunate happens (think Amy Winehouse, Caroline Flack, Peaches Geldolf etc) that people/media actually treat these celebs like humans. Who like many of us, are deeply flawed.

Difference is I guess is that all my mistakes aren’t plastered all over the internet / papers etc. If I were a celeb in my 20s/early 30s, I’d 100% have been a tabloids dream. I’d be in the sidebar of shame on the reg. So I try and give these people a bit of grace because they’re navigating the same shit as others but with so much more scrutiny.

Her whole adult life has been on a platform, so I don’t see why she should do this “privately” now. Who for? David? Nah fuck that dude and his pussy palace.

Just a lurker on here… Maybe it’s just me but I’ve always found Lily vile, I can clearly see through the character assassination she’s done to her ex and the blatant obsession she has to be relevant and famous. She’s made herself a complete victim in their divorce when they clearly had some complicated open relationship. She’s also been proven to have lied about parts already and he’s never had a say as he’s probably been told to say nothing. She’s done it all strategically knowing season 5 of his show was coming out and wanted to cling onto that relevance (kept mentioning the word strangers in her lyrics too). If she hadn’t had affairs behind her other ex husband’s back and had affairs with married men then I would maybe feel sorry for her but I just can’t as it’s double standards. She’s a shit vile person and I have trouble sympathising with her. I also found it weird how whilst she was on a tour of bad mouthing him he was in Disneyworld with her daughters if he’s this awful person why is he still allowed around her children? He obviously isn’t perfect but this is the same woman who cackles about abortions and thinks it’s funny not to remember how many she’s had. Rant over 🤝🏻

I’ve been pondering MO’s bankruptcy, and honestly the more I think about it… the more it really winds me up.

Ok so she earned a shit load of money and didn’t pay her tax like the rest of us do… not good, but it happens.

So she signs bankruptcy and that £170k tax she owed is wiped out. She says in press interviews that she “lost everything” but what exactly did she lose? She didn’t own property - what did she lose? My understanding is that by declaring bankruptcy the debt is wiped out, but it comes with limiting conditions.

But oh no it doesn’t come with conditions does it? As she’s now somehow able to buy a property, and be the director of several companies. What exactly are the results of this bankruptcy then?

oh and she goes to Africa now every Xmas for 4 weeks with her mum and stepdad - that’s lovely for them - but no that £170k can’t be paid back. Yet we all have to quietly pay our tax every month and scratch together what we can.

By the way her stepdad Garfield lost his own business and was investigated as they were withholding staff’s tips. He has a very bad reputation in London hospitality for starting failing businesses and staff losing wages. So it seems like it’s just a constant thing with this family - living the high life, not paying things properly, and moving on to the next project or business without much consequences.

If I sound angry it’s because I am. I’m sick of the average man or woman being hauled over the coals for every tiny financial thing, and people like MO living in the clouds. They should come after her for the tax now she’s making money again and starting businesses.

Wait, Lilys kids are with David whilst she prompted an album calling him a pervert?
I. Cannot.

Doneuplikeadogsdinner said:

Lily has had a fair bit of trauma . Seems like poor parenting / not feeling she fitted in / eating disorders and a still birth .
I don’t really get the ethos of .. look what others have been through …
I’m a really strong person I think but it took one too many things going on at the same time to turn me into an anxious mess
Better now though … and actually found nursing / caring within mental health fine to go back to as I’ve done this job forever but hard if I’m honest cause you take on other people’s trauma .
Podcasts on the whole are meant to be escapism for the listener .. I hope Lily gets back in a place that provides that
I’ve actually not listened to any since she has left !

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I think a lot of people conveniently forget about the death of her son, including me when reading all of the above posts! I don’t care how much money you have, or how famous your dad is, a still birth is one of the most fucking brutally traumatic things a woman can go through. The death of a child is widely recognised as the most traumatic and stressful experience a human can go through. So to say she hasn’t been through enough trauma, or hers isn’t “good enough” is just a bit of a dick move IMO.

Tbf the way lily was talking in the most recent podcast about men with younger women, it didn’t sound like she was complicit in his affairs, she sounded like she was trying hard to hold in her distress but at the same time Is desperate to talk about what he’s done, she sounds like a very typical woman who has been blindsided by their cheating partner, to me she sounded shocked and it correlates with what the media says about her only just discovering this long affair.
She has known something is up for ages, hence her bringing up that book about open relationships, she has been trying to work through their problems and the effect on her mental health for some time and we heard her mood dip as the podcast went on.
I don’t condone affairs in the slightest but I believe she was a very different character when with Sam. She was in active addiction which turns most people into arseholes but it’s clear she’s done a lot of ’work’ on herself over the years, she’s grown up and to suggest that she’s getting what she deserves is to say that nobody can ever escape their past mistakes or that they have to pay for evermore.
I can’t believe all the commenters here and elsewhere are pure as the driven snow and blameless and I’m sure none of us want to be held to account forever for mistakes we’ve made and tried to repair

My (un-asked for) two cents are:

- I like the album. A lot of the songs are quite catchy.
- I've seen people say that she's vicious on the album and has 'ended him' but I don't actually hear much malice in the songs. She's talking about her own pain and her own experiences of trying to make an open relationship work, which (IMHO) she's allowed to share. The reaction to some of the songs has reminded me of situations where someone who has hurt you accuses you of 'making them feel bad' when you are simply describing how you feel.
- I've also read interviews where she says parts of it are fiction, so it seems strange to me to see endless TikToks of people analysing the lyrics to find out 'exactly what happened'.
- I don't think she album is about 'cheating' as such. I think it's actually quite 'modern' in that it's the fall out of someone trying to be in an open relationship because their partner wants to be. It seems like it's less about him sleeping with people outside of the marriage, but more about developing relationships outside of the rules of their open arrangement.
- If it's handled well, I actually think it's quite nice that her girls can maintain a relationship with David. He's said in a few interviews (and on the pod iirc?) that he fell in love with her kids and, despite the fact it seems he's no stranger to lying, I found that genuine. I also think it's possible that he thinks if he can be a good father figure then it offsets the other parts of his life where he doesn't act so well. Maybe that's why he didn't just end the relationship.
- I don't blame Lily for moving with her kids. I don't think she's a saint by any means, but I do think she's damaged and in her misguided way she probably thought that moving them to the US would be the key to providing them with security, stability and a lovely life.
- Find it mad, but predictable, that her partner has hurt her and betrayed her on some level but there is a rush to dredge up any bad thing she's done as a way to balance the books.


I know this isn't everyone's opinion, but despite some of the things she said on the pod, I find myself rooting for Lily. Would love to see her happy and content - whatever that looks like.

ranchdistressing said:

How the other half live. I'm sure most would love to bugger off to a trauma clinic with long walks in the countryside and healthy meals cooked for us for weeks at a time whenever life goes to shit. The rest of us just have to take it on the chin and crack on because bills need paying.

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Yeah you’re right. She’s rich so she should just put up with it.

Depression and addiction doesn’t see your financial status. It can affect anyone. And if she has the means to treat it in the best possible way that money can buy, then I support her doing so. So many rich, famous people have committed suicide in the last few years, probably because of the stigma around treating mental health issues that effects everyone regardless of your status. Such a fucked up attitude to infer that just because they’re rich, they should suffer like everyone else.

Pantomimehorse said:

assume The Globe is a pub? anyway she seemed like a shit mum and explains alot

Edit myself - Googled it and seems its a Caribbean nightclub! wow leaving your 6-9 yr old at home alone while clubbing.

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My mum did this all the time, 70s and 80 also similar heritage, I woke up times alone terrified or woke up to sketchy strangers - men ‘looking after’ me and to my mum coming home in various states, sometimes scarily messy.
when my baby sibling arrived, I as a small child often looked after them through the night too.
I also had drugs long before I was old enough to make the choice (way pre-teens)
And heard a LOT of sex with various people plus non stop men and sex talk, mad violent lovers harassing day and night was just hectic and horrible, never relaxed and constantly dreamed someone would come and rescue me.
It’s not really until now writing it down that I realise the significance of all of this

Poor miquita , I feel more for her now I understand why her emotional growth seems so stunted
And lily tbf, she might have had more money and opportunity but it sounds equally bleak and lonely for her too.

Flibbertigibbet said:

Jesus Christ with the loaves and fishes, this one thinks she invented food altogether!

"There’s a stockpot simmering on Andi Oliver’s stove – for days, the broth has been bubbling. A mugful of the rib-sticking, rich elixir lands in front of me as I’m ushered into her east London kitchen from the cold. She ladles out a flask-full for Garfield, her boyfriend of 30 years, then peers into the saucepan. “I’ve not been well,” says Oliver, “and this has healed me.” She spent the past two months filming in Stratford-upon-Avon, where she always had a similar soup on the go. “It’s giving yourself the care you need. And sharing it with other people doesn’t just fix you, but briefly, the world around you.” Supplies depleted, she begins to rebuild the brew from its bones: pinches of cloves, juniper and star anise are dropped in. A glug of white wine. Taste, then season. No measurements, just instinct. “I started cooking young,” Oliver explains. “To me, it’s everyday magic. Giving you that broth is sharing a little bit of myself – a soul exchange.” Briefly, there’s a moment of serenity."

“We have a sprawling found family,” says Oliver, “that’s precious to me.” She unfurls into an upholstered chair at her long dining table. “Whether or not we’ve had cash, I’ve always had an open-door policy.” When money was tight, and often it was, she’d still feed the hungry. “We’d cook feasts: chicken wings, sacks of rice and potatoes. Whatever was cheap. We might have been using the emergency credit on the electricity meter and ingredients from the shop bought on tick, but if I could get a meal together, then the world felt manageable. When I couldn’t, I knew we were in the shit.” She uses her deep belly laughs as punctuation."

“Cyprus was where I first fell in love with the idea of food and gathering people.”

“We’d throw a party, then buy a bathtub full of mackerel to gut, clean and fillet. We were creating safety and family through food.”

https://www.12ft.io/https://www.arc...9/andi-oliver-lifes-too-short-to-be-appalling

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Oh dear, this is a little grandiose isn’t it.
In translation, it basically boils down to: Andi made some soup.

Rosti be costy

This is the thing - even if they didn’t always have cold hard cash as financial capital, that is very clearly netted out by oodles of social capital. You might not have £700 in your bank account for a gas bill in this moment, but you’re well connected enough that you can drum up that money quickly and in less demeaning/stressful/expensive (eg interest or fines incurred) ways than someone from a lower social class than you. Also it means chances are that situation isn’t long term or permanent for you, plus your earning potential is significantly higher than someone whose best case scenario is working themselves out of childhood poverty into being… a nurse or teacher say. You also have plan bs because you’re surrounded by people with financial means, you’re not trapped in a historically underfunded northern or rural community.

Why are influencers and celebs deathly allergic to admitting any single form of privilege they may have had? Even the free kids Oyster card and decent bus services are a privilege ffs, being pretty is a privilege, good teeth are a privilege, there are so many privileges that so many of us have it doesn’t have to be a case of you have to be Jeff Bezos to have any form of advantage in life?!