Theonlygirlinthehouse #4 The only colourful thing in her beige life is her boys colourful language.
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Probably can't be arsed to be alone with you Jess. He looks terrified 
You can tell Jess was desperately clawing for words to make Russ’ birthday sound delightful, when it reality it sounds boring AF. She must be fuming that the salty sea dog didn’t want to do something more glamorous.
Imagine your partner not wanting to go away with you
She really does sound quite bitter.
To me it sounds like a perfectly pleasant way to spend a birthday but then I am quite an introvert. The problem that Jess has is that she needs 'content' and believes that everyone lives like the influencer gang on the gram. He has wasted an opportunity to show off about their incredible lifestyle, relationship and aspirational celebration!
Russ always looks like it’s a hostage situation.
You’ve hit the nail on the head - nothing wrong with low key birthdays (making a big deal out of birthdays isn’t for me) but I bet she was annoyed that he didn’t want to do anything interesting that she could mine for content. Still managed a bunch of stories and a grid post though!
Jess must be having a bit of a crisis as an influencer. She can’t mine H’s neurodiversity because all signs of it seemingly vanished the moment he left school (not that I’m suggesting it’s an iffy diagnosis that she only pursued as a bargaining chip against the school
), B is leaving home soon and C is nine and therefore not that interesting. What does a mum blogger do when their youngest kid is well past the cute little kid stage?Yes, he really looks it (53).
Wear yellow on the next post if you need help sending Russ.
Wear yellow on the next post if you need help sending Russ.
This woman definitely has more money than sense. I really doubt she will ever wear some of those dress things ever again despite her protests that she wants to wear more colour. I reckon she must have spent about £500?
That garish stripey muu-muu will be worn no more than twice before ending up on Vinted next summer
Are we supposed to believe she found 8 Pristine condition cushions that just so happen to perfectly match her colour scheme in the beach hut at the carboot??? Iv only ever been to one car boot in my life and it was full of shite how does she find these “gems”
The scary part is, I think SHE believes it.
I can't wait to see what she finds on vinted or in the car boot sale next week..... Im gripped!! .
.
She looks manic in those photos, especially the one where she's wearing the floral tent. We've all tried to take nice selfies but how many did she take, to then choose those ones?
. Not a fan anyway but she looks really awkward in them and she is clearly only happy in baggy beige stuff.