Mrs Hinch #679 Forget the Elf, leave Hinch on the shelf

[or JusRollWithIt]

Just a small selection of Hinch’s chopping boards.

Giving Kate Hudson some serious competition

 

[Char4649]

Whoever paired a pale blue suit with black heels needs sacking

 

[Fluffy20]

I wonder if some people actually ever think about what they put on social media. Jamie’s comment on Hinch’s post today “That’s my wife. So proud”. I’d love to ask him what exactly he’s proud of her for. Sitting looking pretty?
Someone else did her hair, someone else did her makeup, someone else took the photos so what has she actually accomplished today that he’s so proud of her for?
What he really means is “This is my wife, looking like a stereotype of a conventionally attractive woman in western society and I should therefore be considered superior to other men because I get to share a bed with her”
If my partner ever tried to tell me he was proud of me because I look pretty I would tell him to fuck off. It’s patronising and demeaning.

 

[Wize Owl]

Guysssssh, woke up due to bassshtard heartburn so instead of talking to my Christmasssh tree I thought I’d be creative….

I’ll just leave this here…..

 

[Tootle Pip Wiz]

Fucking hell fire I actually thought for a second she'd started up an Only Fans account and that was a close up of her trap door...........

 

[BeeHappy]

Mrs Hinch #679 Forget the Elf - Leave Hinch on the Shelf. new title courtesy of @The Green Triangle
Thread suggestions taken from anywhere on the thread. Please keep them short and swear free and clearly marked thread suggestion.

My round up of the last thread won’t be chiefs kiss like @Wize Owl’s but here’s a recap:

Hinch had tomato soup with Mummaz from Greggs despite having 7824 tins at home.
She put up a Christmas garland on the stairs which looks like a uterus.
She hinted at big things to come, which turned out to be 2 new fragrances. Aeu de wet camel, anyone??
Elf on the shelf is back and is now called David. Elf activity has been sporadic, but mainly consists of her screaming at the boys when they try and touch it. On day two, the Elf tried to climb the Xmas tree using tins of beans. Is she trying to get a collab with Heinz!!
She took part in an Azaylia ad but forgot to tell her sheep about it straight away as she was so excited to look at old pictures of herself in OK magazine!
After a couple of days off, Sophie was back with a reel of her decorated tree in the satsumary. Lucky she put it up because that night she couldn’t sleep so she sat up and had a chat with it! She should try looking at her own Instagram feed. That’ll put her to sleep!
Another boring noths ad with some £40 see through pjs for the boyzzzz. To make room for them she appears to have rehomed the noths advent calendars at Maldon tip.
Followers were treated to a Xmas tree Q&A where she refuses to name the secret local garden centre - because they didn’t give her a freebie?!
A couple more elf updates, including one of Elf having a on the toilet and her snapping at Ron when he rightly says “that’s not poo it’s chocolate” and the attempted murder of David when the other toys threw him down the stairs!
She’s started her ‘pre-Christmas clean’ on the 5th December..but early, Soph!!
And finally, announced that she would be taking Thursday off (as if she doesn’t every week) because she’s having a photoshoot at Not a Farm, and she’s worried about not being sexy!

Wiki is pink button at the top. Thread 500 a must for newbies.

 

[tikimelon]

Don’t have any babydoll sheep though, do ya babes?

 

[HinchesSousChef]

Post started to glitch so will do part 2 here:
Moreover, it feels like by leading with “this is my theme” she’s almost breaking the fourth wall. You’d imagine this is what she was pitching in her content meetings. The lack of mystery; the lack of delicacy I suppose comes across as half hearted and quite frankly Lazy. It reads as “here’s my theme. This is my Instagram door. I did it because that’s what I have to do for my job”. The whole thing feels like she was forced to do something she didn’t want to. Even the narrative of “I couldn’t make the foliage work on my own so the florists had to help me” feels desperate and defeatist. Ok. It didn’t work. So why didn’t you just adapt your idea? Why not do something that was within your capability instead? Or why not take a content opportunity and SHOW what the florists did - show how they achieved what you couldn’t. Show yourself learning from them. Of course we all know why she won’t show that. It was done ages ago; it was done whilst she was sat on the sofa etc etc.

Where is the Timelapse of her and her mother creating this doorway?

Where is the family photo? Where are the children (not that I encourage her showing them) and them helping to decorate the trees?

It’s point. I bought. I paid this person to do this. But why? Why did you do it? What purpose does it serve? Your home is gated. If it’s for your own satisfaction and enjoyment, well sorry to say it hinch, but that didn’t come across. It felt forced. It felt contrived and it felt desperate.

Oh dear.

 

[horseybox1982]

I nearly broke my neck running here when I saw that reel she posted. It’s an eye fucking extravaganza isn’t it? And the end with the dog, Jesus Christ.
---

Size five my arsehole

 

[Blondesx40x]

Mirror mirror on the wall
Who's the most boring of them all
The mirror laughed and said with glee
You...Sophie Rose aged 33

 

[ChickenPie]

She can't cope with much can she. The thought of ducks on a flooded pond- mind blowing! She really won't be able to cope when it all goes tits up in a year or two!

Thread suggestion- She can't cope, she can't sleep, she can't have babydoll sheep!

 

[MrsD33]

The first word that came to me when I watched that reel was FRUMPY.

Those extensions are so outdated.

The clothes were all old fashioned and frumpy.

And the black shoes ….. Either wear heels or wear flats. They were like granny shoes. You know when old women like wearing heels still when they go to a do but they can’t have them too high because they cant walk…

 

[lalala88]

Ya know what really gets my goat is that she makes this whole pre video making out like she doesn't want to do the shoot. As though she's been forced to do it because she's in such high demand. The reality is she has completely engineered it. It's "her" team. I can't stand this faux lil ole Soph I just want to sit at home with my animals but fame keeps knocking on my door but I don't know why. Maybe it's because you put your entire fucking life online and constantly beg for attention?!
Can't believe this is my life that I have begged, borrowed and stolen to get here. Girl put another record on already cos you broke.

 

[ChickenPie]

It's giving Littlewoods catalogue vibes

 

[anniemouse]

That dog is so far away from him that if he takes a shit there's not a hope in hell of finding it, so I'm betting he probably never picks up a turd.

The last turd he picked up was in the office several years ago

 

[WendyW]

I just can’t with her…
My Christmas wish…For Mrs Hinch to be cancelled please

 

[BBC1HD]

I think she looks really pretty in that reel

I'll show myself out

...pretty old .

Her whole style from the heavy makeup to the clothes she wears to the ridiculous weave she has ages her by atleast 10 years. She looks like a well aged 45 year old mature woman.

 

[HinchesSousChef]

I tend to look at my children and internally say to myself “I can’t believe I have three amazing, healthy, happy children. I’m so lucky. I’m so grateful.” I don’t squawk out of my window “I can’t believe I’ve got 2 cats. I can’t cope! I’ve got two cats”.

 

[theleagueofgentlemen]

She could try watching her own stories back. She’s so boring they’d send a glass eye to sleep.

 

[Dont swipe up!]

Are we all missing the point??
Why the bloody dog and alpaca pics and not her fucking kids!!!????
Fucking weird man