A friend was due to call down to me during the week, nothing fussy, just for a cuppa and a chat. No sign. I waited in all day. Later got a text saying they'd forgotten. I admit I feel gutted, that I mean so little to someone that they just forget about me. It's happened before with other people. It's been on my mind all week, feeling very low.
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I hope you’re on the mend now, I can’t imagine having to look after myself after major surgery like that.
I think a lot of people are massively selfish and they always expect someone else to do it. This has got worse after lockdown.
in 2015 I broke my leg and had surgery, it was a bad break and I spent 3 months at home. In the initial stages I put a Facebook post up asking if anyone was going to a primark at the weekend if they could pick me up something. At the time I felt I had a good/decent number of friends and family who might look out for me. One person responded but didn’t actually do it. I was really taken aback at how people were so unwilling to do something pretty simple. Not even my sister who was in and out primark every other day and works down the road from one could take a moment to help me out.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you by the way, I just think we’re living in a society where people can’t be bothered to look out for each other - if you’re lucky enough to have a spouse and living/well parents those are your best bet when times get tough. I think that’s mostly what life is like.
An update.
I sent her a VN just asking if everything is okay with her & advising if she's got stuff going on & can't provide support for me rn, then that's fine but please just let me know.
No response but has listened to the VN on Friday.
Ugh. Sorry this happened. I used to know someone who did this to me twice. It’s gutting to be so easily forgotten.
I stopped contacting them after the second time and needless to say, they didn’t stay in touch either …
I find it so crazy how you’ll stop reaching out after a few attempts and that person will never contact you again. Like what were you doing in my life in the first place? I always wonder do they ever think of you, or think to reach out and decide against it or do they literally just forget your existence and move on?
Yes it’s so true! I’ve had this happen to me and it sucks I was friends with this person for 10+ years, was always there for her during hard times but as you said I stopped reaching out to her (it was always me to instigate the conversation) and yep she never contacted me again
I would like to think that all the times I was there for this person that this would have had an impact on her but no it’s appears not! I hear you all it utterly sucks and is like a gut punch 
why are people so self centred and also what did I do to deserve such treatment I ask myself 
I’ve since moved on and learned to accept it’s not me it’s them, I am a good friend and I deserve better, however I am definitely more wary of reaching out/ making new friends and is probably why I no longer have any 
My friend of 20+ years has always been pretty tit at texting back despite being on her phone all the time but lately I'm getting so upset over how selfish she is. I had a baby 6 months ago and she's met them once. She barely asks me how the baby or I am but when she's having drama after drama I'm expected to be there for her (which I am). I always tell myself next time I'm not doing it but if course I do. This time she ranted at me for two days straight 3 weeks ago and I gave her advice and listened to her and I haven't heard from her since. I've messaged twice in three weeks asking how she is and if she's okay. Nothing. She views my stories on IG though. I feel like I'm done but I know I never am. She'll have some sob story or excuse as to why she hasn't been in touch and I'll lap it up like I always do. People never check in on me and I just feel so alone sometimes. I have always wanted a close friendship group but no one stays. No one cares. Except me. I care too much and I always get hurt.
I felt this so hard. I just want to be loved. I just feel like we give so much for breadcrumbs back, it seems so unfair and it’s really upsetting.
Are you able to take your little one to baby groups, that helped me connect with other mums and fill my day so I wasn’t so alone. It is tough though, especially when you know they are active online.
This guy, I can see when he is active. He’s always on his phone. I can see he’s like other posts this week. Not mine though. Out of everybody I thought he was there for me, it hurts more than my surgery scars.
I feel so emotional about it. I have nobody.
I just want to be loved and love and care for another, like how I care for others... I’m craving human connection. I’m lonely
I’m sorry this has happened to you, it’s so hard to find a healthy balance in friendships sometimes. For what it’s worth this so called friend of yours sounds like she no longer is. It’s not ok to be used only as a trauma-dumping ground because they know how much you crave a friendly connection and obvs a nice person. Consider how you would like to set boundaries for yourself as this pattern of behaviour would carry on and keep affecting you negatively. This may include blocking her to prevent further contacts.
Sending you so much love. It's incredibly tough to feel so much in this usually cold world. I think it's the curse of being an empath unfortunately and those who are not empaths just don't get it.I felt this so hard. I just want to be loved. I just feel like we give so much for breadcrumbs back, it seems so unfair and it’s really upsetting.
Are you able to take your little one to baby groups, that helped me connect with other mums and fill my day so I wasn’t so alone. It is tough though, especially when you know they are active online.
This guy, I can see when he is active. He’s always on his phone. I can see he’s like other posts this week. Not mine though. Out of everybody I thought he was there for me, it hurts more than my surgery scars.
I feel so emotional about it. I have nobody.
I just want to be loved and love and care for another, like how I care for others... I’m craving human connection. I’m lonely
Yeh I go to baby groups regularly but I just feel like the people I've met are more acquaintances than friends and group chats that I'm in tend to trigger me more because people don't really respond to me like they do with the others in the group. Perhaps I'm too sensitive. It's so easy to overthink everything.