Zoella #2 ZoeHoHo's Feeling Jealous of Joe? 24 Dayes Of Vlogmas, 11 Months On Go Slow

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Merry Christmas ya filthy animals...
Not you Nahallllah....
If this thread still exists in June.

Well Zoe is probably getting excited for Christmas so ??‍♀
 
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I wonder what Christmas content she will produce this year? Surely not a new batch of Christmas jumpers?! I'm still rocking the same cheap Primark number I bought 4 years ago. Comes out one a year for the office Christmas lunch and then hides away again...
 
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Knowing Zoe let’s have a guess.

• An advent calendar for Alfie, overpriced “siiiick” tat that really suits a 17 yr old boy more than a grown ass adult but you know what “savage sushi Deyes” is like. Got to get him to like spending time with her somehow.

• BFF Mark days!!! Is there a garden centre near by ? let’s go for PIZZA!! eat haribo in the car while singing like the greatest showman soundtrack, because that’s content we never get sick of.

• a possible upload with TaRN and Jim. Because nothing screams fake friendship like that one day a year you dress the same as your “bestie” and make “beaut” “avo on toast” for breakfast after an afternoon of Christmas games (filming 11/12 uploads for content during 2019...)

• some BEAUT wintery festive walks with nah-laa. Got to get that gram...

• Early onset diabetes for the in-laws in the shape of Christmas Eve boxes. Stuffed full of 200’000 of your favourite Christmas calories ?

• Another trip to Scotland?
Or that Tree Hut place that pays them to go there.

• GIFT GIVING WITH MARK ?

“I mean..oh. My. Gawd you didn’t.. MAAARK I LOVE IT, you know me so well!!!!”
(Wagamamas take out voucher - Spon) ??

Im falling asleep typing.
Maybe she could just re-upload 2016 Zoella.
Back when her dreams of having a marriage and kids and a boyfriend that acted like an adult weren’t yet dead like the guine pig ?

RIP Pippin....
I feel a bit more sorry for Percy ngl.
Run free little pig..




0DA4C211-3E88-418F-876B-636358EEAF72.jpeg

REMEMBER THEM ZOE!!! I’m sure there’s still one banging about somewhere! Maybe a festive piggy hunt?!?
 
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Hahahah nice recap. Let me add:

Looking all excited and daydreaming about the possibility that froggy will finally propose this Christmas and then dissapearing into her duvet cover until the middle of January when she finally realizes it’ll not happen this year.
 
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Her vlogmas contents are quite repetitive. Let me have a guess as well.

*Vlogmas intro reveal, Christmas movies on repeat, Christmas songs in the early morning, takeaways at night
*Picking Christmas trees with Alfie's family
*Home tour of the decorations (with the dirty pool as the background)
*Went to festive Christmas markets, Christmas shopping, ice skating
*Probably show different brands of advent calendars she has+ PO Box opening+ Zoella products
*1-2 days road trip with soppy, Mark, and Alife
*Annual Christmas party for her A to Z employees at her mansion
*Inviting her high school friends to come over for an early Christmas party
*Jim and Tanya come to visit Zalfie for a day
*Mark visits and exchange presents with Zoe+having a day trip to somewhere else (ex: garden center or Waitrose)
*Festive outfits for Nala, and have a photographer takes pictures
*visit her parents in Brighton with Joe
*Alfie's family comes to her mansion for Christmas
*Suddenly doesn't' feel well or catch a cold/flu

Feel bored already just by typing out these contents...
 
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• Office party.

• Office Secret Santa

• Office sleep over in Casa de Zalfie dressed as elf’s complete with home made goodies (Waitrose pre made!) and Christmas games!

• Gleam team gathering ? maddie (the one who caught her man Zoe!!) will have many passive aggressive comments and bitchy glares gifted to her by Zoe. ?

• Poppy and Shawn. ? even typing their names makes me sigh.

• Amanda called in at the last minute to actually cook Christmas dinner whilst Zoe, Alfie and the miserable Twins GET THAT GRAM.

• Arguments about which sweet is better for the 83rd time.

• A recap of 2018 and how much zoezeebo has grown as a person, how much stronger she is and focused and how content she is..
Office is wonderful.
Therapy is wonderful
Her life is just BEAUT!!!!

(Cries into the unused baby clothes she’s been buying for years while watching Alfie play with himself/a new PlayStation game/ a violin... his new toy of the year. Goodbye piano!!)

(Edit: this thread could become more entertaining than her actual content... I’m excited!!!)
Tattymas.... the Zoella version
@GossWhore are you up for the recap challenge or have you got a cold coming on like I Zoe. ?
 
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*Home tour of the decorations (with the dirty pool as the background)
Ahh yes, the pool. Notice she hasn't really shown the garden in her vlogs recently. Perhaps because the pool is still up, festering? Perhaps steam rises up from it on the cold mornings, rather like a compost heap, muck heap or slurry pit?
 
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• Office party.

• Office Secret Santa

• Office sleep over in Casa de Zalfie dressed as elf’s complete with home made goodies (Waitrose pre made!) and Christmas games!

• Gleam team gathering [emoji3060] maddie (the one who caught her man Zoe!!) will have many passive aggressive comments and bitchy glares gifted to her by Zoe. [emoji23]

• Poppy and Shawn. [emoji57] even typing their names makes me sigh.

• Amanda called in at the last minute to actually cook Christmas dinner whilst Zoe, Alfie and the miserable Twins GET THAT GRAM.

• Arguments about which sweet is better for the 83rd time.

• A recap of 2018 and how much zoezeebo has grown as a person, how much stronger she is and focused and how content she is..
Office is wonderful.
Therapy is wonderful
Her life is just BEAUT!!!!

(Cries into the unused baby clothes she’s been buying for years while watching Alfie play with himself/a new PlayStation game/ a violin... his new toy of the year. Goodbye piano!!)

(Edit: this thread could become more entertaining than her actual content... I’m excited!!!)
Tattymas.... the Zoella version
@GossWhore are you up for the recap challenge or have you got a cold coming on like I Zoe. [emoji2960]
You lot want me to die???
But I'm up for it. Mama didn't raise a quitter.
 
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Let’s be honest @GossWhore she’s gonna last about 14 days and it will just be a lot of fake giggles, singing, her puppy’s Mark and Nahhlah sniffing at her crotch for attention and treats
(Not Alfie mind.... not his thing. ?)
garden center, office, words that should never be abbreviated, abbreviated ?
quality street,
Hero’s,
Roses,
Cold and flu remedy.
?

I have faith in you girl. Take one for team Tattlemas. ?
Tattzella vlogs. Brought to you by gosswhore.
 
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Let’s be honest @GossWhore she’s gonna last about 14 days and it will just be a lot of fake giggles, singing, her puppy’s Mark and Nahhlah sniffing at her crotch for attention and treats
(Not Alfie mind.... not his thing. ?)
garden center, office, words that should never be abbreviated, abbreviated ?
quality street,
Hero’s,
Roses,
Cold and flu remedy.
?

I have faith in you girl. Take one for team Tattlemas. ?
Tattzella vlogs. Brought to you by gosswhore.
Yeah, she’ll get a cold and put herself to bed for a week saying she’s ‘so ill’. She’ll gram photos of bunches of Get Well Soon flowers from her AMAZING TEAM.

For a woman so desperate for marriage and babies, god knows how she would ever cope with motherhood when having a sniffle leaves her bed bound. Mums don’t get sick days.
 
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I doubt Zoe has anything to do with it, her PR usually send the tat out to anyone and everyone who looks like they might have an audience.
But I wonder now it’s the festive season will “chummy and chummy” get in touch for the content. They were always big money earners for both involved.
We had the hello world fiasco last year and obviously some arguments happened after that but Zoe’s numbers are dropping fast. I don’t think she’s above faking a friendship again.
@GossWhore

Interesting to see Mark Ferris has now come out with an “eating disorder” story that’s only come up in the last couple of years.
How strange this has only happened after being with someone he looks up to and adores like his master Zoe.
I can’t be the only one who sees this.
And unfortunately I do know what I’m talking about on this topic. I hate to admit that.
I’m angry. ??
I’m actually angry because I see mark trying to hide her plates in his vlog or skim over her left overs. She’s such a vile human I know in the back of my mind it’s the reason I’ve hated her for so long,
Because I was her.
Probably am still her to an extent.
Without the dip stick boyfriend and fugly dog.
But she’s surrounded by yes men who won’t say to her “this has to stop” and they allow her control what she eats and what she gives to others to eat.
Feederella. ?
(Excuse my rant I know I’ve probably been too hard. TRIGGERED ??)
 
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do you know some titles of the vlogs where you can kinda see this? they hiding her plates or not eating up I mean. I didn't recognized that at all but I'm not very attentive regarding this topic.

(Also so sorry you had to struggle with that too. Of course this is something that triggers you then. Especially when Zoe is a person with such an immense influence to younger ones and presents herself as so perfect.)
 
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@Oohthedrama Yes, I'm curious to go back on past vlogs and see where they do this, that is if you don't mind sharing? It's not something I have ever picked up on before. Considering how Zoe brags in her vlogs of how much food they've ordered (whether it's room service or take-away), I hate to think how much all of that is for show and that only such a small portion is actually eaten by Zoe herself while the rest gets discarded.

Sorry to hear that you have gone through such struggles and I hope you're in a better place or have a good support system in place.
 
If you ever watch vlogs from Mark or Alfie when they’re eating @thenomad you will notice both avoid showing her plates when they’re finished or showing what’s in front of her, especially if it’s s meal out, both have slipped up at times and show her take aways are a kids portion of chips or her pizza is barely touched, I probably notice it more because I did it for years. She pushes food on others.
I Always talked about how much I ate and always bought food for others/my family.
Always the stuff I wanted myself but would never allow myself. ?
Eventually I was told that I’d have no involvement in my family’s meals or buying food for them/watching what they ate. Harsh but it’s what Zoe needs, her eating disorder (in my opinion!! Is stronger when she’s controlling what others eat)
I’m confused as to why her therapist doesn’t push her to change more about her life but she’s coasting along doing the bare minimum, I assume that’s why her eating habits and behaviour has never been challenged, because she’s surrounded by yes men.
Marks upload had me worried about him more than her, he’s clearly been effected he even said himself this isn’t something he faced at university l
He wanted to be thin, like Zoe tries to flaunt at every opportunity.
Bar the stuffed boob baps... ? ?

Again ALL my own opinion, I’m not diagnosing anyone, just looking through a cracked mirror at myself. ?
With worse eyebrows and a side split I want to sort out.. ?
 
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loved your vlogmas guesses so I created a template for those of you who actually want to join a bingo about her vlogmas. extra points if your guess is something very specific or something she actually never did before but will do this time!

zoella predictable vlogmas bingo 2018 - Kopie.png
 
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