My mum died from Covid back in April. Wow that’ll be a year soon. My Dad is still around but I need to clear my mums stuff out of the house eventually. She was only 60 so had a great stash of clothes, shoes, jewellery etc. Where do I even start? Should I donate it? Sell it? Ask friends if hers if they want any items? How on earth do I decide what to keep??? Help!!
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Really sorry that you have lost your Mum, that's really sad.
I'd do what's best and easiest for you, has she left a will or did she talk to you about wanting to leave anything to anyone? I think its a personal decision really. You could also think about your Mums values etc and if she supported any charities etc. I'd think about it.
Also a lot of the charities will collect from the house now as well, so you dont have to be carrying loads of bags round to the shop etc.x
I'd do what's best and easiest for you, has she left a will or did she talk to you about wanting to leave anything to anyone? I think its a personal decision really. You could also think about your Mums values etc and if she supported any charities etc. I'd think about it.
Also a lot of the charities will collect from the house now as well, so you dont have to be carrying loads of bags round to the shop etc.x
Last edited:
Firstly, my condolences.
You don't mention your dad much apart from saying he's still around. Does he have any say in what happens? Clothes and shoes are obviously very personal items which you'll always associate with your mum. In my opinion it'd be weird seeing them on someone else so I'd be looking to charity them or give them to a clothing bank.
For jewelry and ornaments, why not keep some of the more sentimental pieces and then sell the others? It's hard to know exactly what to say because everyone's own experiences will be different.
You don't mention your dad much apart from saying he's still around. Does he have any say in what happens? Clothes and shoes are obviously very personal items which you'll always associate with your mum. In my opinion it'd be weird seeing them on someone else so I'd be looking to charity them or give them to a clothing bank.
For jewelry and ornaments, why not keep some of the more sentimental pieces and then sell the others? It's hard to know exactly what to say because everyone's own experiences will be different.
No will no. The only discussion we had was about me keeping her jewellery which of course I’ll treasure. Hopefully the charities and charity shops will open up soon so I can start sorting. It feels weird keeping things that are just ‘things’ when I’m sure someone less fortunate would be grateful for them. Choosing charities she supported is a nice idea. Even money raised on eBay could be donated. She’d like that x
My Dad doesn’t really hold any sentiment to clothes and things like that. He still lives in the house and every corner of the house has memories. It’s more the general clothes and stuff mums accumulate. I’d like to think others could benefit from it as it’s all nice stuff. Maybe I’ll keep a capsule of her favourites x
So sorry to hear you lost your mum xxx
so I’d say maybe Keep hold of the jewellery for now, and you can decide what to keep at a later date.
bag up and bin things like underwear, well worn shoes etc - things that won’t do anyone else.
keep a few items of clothes if this is something you feel you would like to do. Some people do, others don’t. I’d ask your Dad again if he would like anything to keep. Also if she had make up/perfume etc ask him if he would like to keep any perfume etc and if not I’d say get rid of that kind of stuff.
id say donate anything else or if she had any thing you feel could be sold (I’m thinking coats/jackets/boots/ things that perhaps didn’t get worn as often or were maybe more expensive then maybe try to sell those and donate the money?
there’s no right or wrong thing to do here but I do think your Dad should be a bit more involved, you will be removing her items from their home after all.
so I’d say maybe Keep hold of the jewellery for now, and you can decide what to keep at a later date.
bag up and bin things like underwear, well worn shoes etc - things that won’t do anyone else.
keep a few items of clothes if this is something you feel you would like to do. Some people do, others don’t. I’d ask your Dad again if he would like anything to keep. Also if she had make up/perfume etc ask him if he would like to keep any perfume etc and if not I’d say get rid of that kind of stuff.
id say donate anything else or if she had any thing you feel could be sold (I’m thinking coats/jackets/boots/ things that perhaps didn’t get worn as often or were maybe more expensive then maybe try to sell those and donate the money?
there’s no right or wrong thing to do here but I do think your Dad should be a bit more involved, you will be removing her items from their home after all.
Perhaps ask friends / family if they want any jewelry.
I agree with selling nice coats and shoes etc but I'd donate the rest . Unless it fits you and you will wear it, there is no point in keeping. It fulfilled its purpose when your mum owned it. Take photos of the things you want to remember.
I agree with selling nice coats and shoes etc but I'd donate the rest . Unless it fits you and you will wear it, there is no point in keeping. It fulfilled its purpose when your mum owned it. Take photos of the things you want to remember.
I’m sorry for your loss, take you time. I helped my mum clear out my grandmas when we lost both her and my grandad. We first asked the family if there was anything they wanted.
We put most big things on Facebook market place, either for free or for a small price. We donates some bits and I sold the clothes, lots were designer, on eBay.
We put most big things on Facebook market place, either for free or for a small price. We donates some bits and I sold the clothes, lots were designer, on eBay.
If you are donating clothes to charity shops, bear in mind that if you live in a small place, it may not be the best thing to give them to local charity shops if possible. Seeing someone wearing your loved one's clothing can be really upsetting. Obviously this is only an issue if the items are immediately recognisable, but I was caught out in this way and nearly got hit by a car as I ran across the road when I thought I saw my granny wearing her favourite coat. 
In that moment, I genuinely thought it was her.
In that moment, I genuinely thought it was her.This must be so hard, I’m so grateful I haven’t had to go through a dilemma like this in my life yet.
I have no helpful advice but just wanted to send my love and best wishes to you
I have no helpful advice but just wanted to send my love and best wishes to you
Hi. I lost my mum a year ago and we still haven’t cleared out anything from her room. I have started making a memory box of things to remember her by like her favourite DVD, glasses, jewellery ect. Some of the clothes my nan bought her for the Christmas that year she never got to wear so I ended up taking them home and wearing them! It felt good to put life into those items as they were just in the wardrobe and I felt like they were dying too. I have kept one of her jumpers with her smell on too. Don’t rush, take your time and don’t worry, you will know what’s right! So sorry for your loss 
Hi not really an answer to your question but if you are sentimental and there are some items of clothing that remind you particularly of your mum you can get them made into pillows etc. Then you are keeping one special piece (and it will probably be easier to get rid of the other clothes because you know you have one special thing to remind you of her) I have a friend who found this a great comfort when sorting through her own mums things. X
This has made me feel so much better. Thank you. P.S she was a mad shoe collector so those Manolos are all mine!!!! xxHi. I lost my mum a year ago and we still haven’t cleared out anything from her room. I have started making a memory box of things to remember her by like her favourite DVD, glasses, jewellery ect. Some of the clothes my nan bought her for the Christmas that year she never got to wear so I ended up taking them home and wearing them! It felt good to put life into those items as they were just in the wardrobe and I felt like they were dying too. I have kept one of her jumpers with her smell on too. Don’t rush, take your time and don’t worry, you will know what’s right! So sorry for your loss
Yesss you wear those shoes with pride
Sorry for your loss.
I have recently seen on Facebook a family friend sent some of her husband's favourite shirts to a lady who cut them up and made several bears for the family, e.g checked shirt patch bears, as a comforting keepsake. Perhaps this might be an idea if there is a particular favourite garment that you can't part with but wouldn't wear yourself.
I have recently seen on Facebook a family friend sent some of her husband's favourite shirts to a lady who cut them up and made several bears for the family, e.g checked shirt patch bears, as a comforting keepsake. Perhaps this might be an idea if there is a particular favourite garment that you can't part with but wouldn't wear yourself.
First off sorry for your loss. In terms of what to do with the stuff, I'd keep anything sentimental and things like Jewellery. You could ask if her friends want anything once you've separated those bits and then I'd donate the rest when charity shops reopen. Personally if you go down that route I'd bag anything like underwear (except bras) in one bag and label it as rag, I'd then bag anything that's stained, has holes or shoes that are past their best and label it the same. (Charity shops will still accept and make money from those 'rags') or you could just bin those items. For reference I've worked/volunteered in charity shops for over 10 years) I also wouldn't rush the process if you're unsure of what you might want to keep especially if your dad isn't bothered by having those items in the house. You could also put any designer items online for sale etc if you/he would like to make some money back from anything. I hope that helps a little.