yesYour husband locked you out? On purpose?
Thank you@Annie101 I really feel for you and wish I could help. Talk all you want on here it sounds like your only release. I know that walking on eggshells only too well.
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yesYour husband locked you out? On purpose?
Thank you@Annie101 I really feel for you and wish I could help. Talk all you want on here it sounds like your only release. I know that walking on eggshells only too well.
I'm sorry for my stupid questions, I just couldn't believe what I was readingyes
Thank you
funnily enough neither could iI'm sorry for my stupid questions, I just couldn't believe what I was reading
I wanted to write on here but felt like my pain was nothing compared to everyone else’s losses/pain. But I honestly don’t think I’ll ever get over the pain of being heartbroken - my partner left me after 8 years together leaving me with a 2 year old and straight away had a fling with a young girl in the office. It hurt so so much like physically I feel like I’ll never get over it. He was my first boyfriend too so I’d never had to see the person I loved with someone else, we were also engaged and I never want to be engaged again i feel like I can never re-live that magical moment again. I guess it’s still quite raw so I can’t imagine anyone seeing me naked again or sharing pregnancy/childbirth again with anyone. But everyday I feel a bit better and my little boy has pulled me through it more than anyoneCan I be honest. I’ve been through some tit but the hardest thing was watching the person I fell madly in love with love someone else.
I have moved on now and found someone had a family but when I see him or hear his name inside it does feel like a punch to the gut. It’s insane how much it affected me.
You are amazing. Have you considered going to the police about your brother? I know it would be hard, but it's possible he will do the same to someone else. Does he have children or is he in contact with them? Who have you talked to about this? I wish you peace.As someone said above I definitely recommend therapy and try and find the right person and it will help!
I was sexually abused as a child by my older brother and never told my mum as she suffered with severe depression and I knew it would kill her - my brother was also her favourite so maybe I thought she wouldn’t believe me She died 2 years ago from alcoholic liver disease and I did think of telling her on her death bed but then thought there’s no point. I still fell so angry all the time (I don’t speak to my brother but he lives near so see him sometimes) but you can’t let the anger weigh you down. I’m reading a few self help books so hopefully that will help.
I’ve also had lots of suicidal feelings and wished a serious illness on myself but these days if I can get through one day without thinking this I know I’ve done good
Chin up because us women are made of strong stuff xx
I am so sorry for everything you're going through. As for your husband, maybe some couples counselling? As well as individual counselling for you. Counselling sounds daunting and scary but it can really be so helpful in helping us work through hard things and get our thoughts straight.
The hardest thing I've gone through was losing my 4 year old son. That was 4 years ago and it's not something I'll ever overcome. It's taken over every fibre of my being and every second of my life. I think about him ALL the time, which I wouldn't think was possible but he's on my mind 24/7 and I miss him so much. I don't know how I get through it and how I'm still here, but I am.
Knowing I have to get through the rest of my life without him is incredibly hard, but I have my two other kids and I know it would hurt them more if they couldn't have me as their Mum for the rest of my life. I have to be here for them.
I’m so sorry you’ve had such a difficult life but you sound so strong and positive now. I hope things continue to go well for you. You are an inspirationReading these have made me incredibly sad, especially those who have lost children. I am sending so much love, I don't really have any other words. I hope life is kinder to all of you. I will share mine in a little while.
I had an unsettled childhood. My dad is foreign and left to live in his country when I was about 3, shortly after my older sister was diagnosed with cancer. My mum was away with her in hospital a lot and I stayed with family members. When I was very young I couldn't understand why both my parents had left me. After years of fighting, when I was 7 (and my sister was 16) she passed away in the night. We were living with my grandparents and she had a bed set up in the living room. The following morning I woke up for school, went downstairs to have my breakfast and discovered her body. I asked my mum why she wasnt breathing and she told me she was dead. I won't ever forget that moment.
After that we lived with my grandparents for years, my mum was suicidal and could only provide the most basic care for me and my younger sister. I had no real support and was left to get on with things, I cried myself to sleep most nights and had nightmares often. I also felt like I wanted to die a lot of the time.
When I was 12, my mum found us a house to live in and I was excited that we were going to be a normal family. My mums boyfriend also moved in though, he was nasty, controlling and abusive (mostly towards me). Their relationship finally ended years later when he threw her over a chair and fractured her skull and broke her ribs (he did this in front of me, I had to kick him out and call her an ambulance and go to the hospital with her).
Before this though I couldn't stand living with him and left to go and live with my dad, he was emotionally abusive. He would create arguments with me (for example ask me if I actually loved him, then accuse me of lying and say I dont love him). He would punish me by giving me the silent treatment, I would be kept in my bedroom only allowed out to go to school and allowed one meal a day. This would go on for weeks until I would break down, cry and apologise then he would be ok with me again for a couple weeks until the cycle started again. After a year of this he kicked me out and sent me back to England.
At this point I was 14 and my mum wouldn't let me back to her so I went to live with my grandparents again, probably the most settled couple years of my life! Once I left school at 16 I went to live with my mum but our relationship broke down quickly (I was angry, naughty, full of attitude and off the rails), I ended up living in a b&b as a child in care. I moved between temporary accommodation for 2 years then when I was 18 met a man a fair bit older than me and got pregnant. He was also very controlling (there is SO much I could say about him but honestly I am the least affected by him and what he did I dont even think about it. He was recently sectioned and I'm aware that his other childs mum to this day has nightmares about him), I had a difficult pregnancy then had a little girl, stillborn at 27 weeks. After the funeral, within 3 months of each other my lovely nanny passed away, I haemorrhaged and needed emergency surgery and my daughters father beat me literally black and blue.
I left him and met my current partner and my healing began. Slowly but surely things got better and the awful things stopped happening - I was given a council flat in an area nearby and it was the fresh start I needed. As time went on things got more and more settled and I started to become the person I wanted to be, started working and built up my confidence. I had a baby who is 4 now and things just got better.
Last year I got pregnant again, at my 20 week scan my baby was diagnosed with open spina bifida. He appeared to already have no movement in his legs and would have been severely disabled, I had to make the difficult decision to end the pregnancy. I gave birth at the end of June and he is buried with my daughter.
However, I am ok. Actually, I'm happy. My life has been chaotic and traumatic but I'm settled now. I have a good relationship with both my parents, I have a healthy, happy son who is thriving at school, I'm in a happy relationship, my home is safe and secure and I enjoy my job. My only issues now are surrounding money, I'm skint and in debt but it's nothing. I do feel like I have had some of the worst luck and I'm due some really good karma now, I might start doing the lottery!
The way I've got through everything is just to take each day as it comes, I have to get through because I have no choice! Every day doesnt have to be a good day, just get through it however I can. As time goes on, things do get easier and the pain numbs.
Sorry that was so long, I've given my entire life story!