Wanting another baby

[Pagger]

I'm just wondering if anyone out there has been in the situation where they don't feel done with having children, but for financial reasons won't be having any more?

My eldest is 4 and youngest is 7 months. Looking back I had pnd with my 4 year old and this time round I'm in a much better place and I'm truly experiencing the amazingness of the baby phase.

We categorically cannot afford another baby, but I just feel so sad at the thought of never being pregnant again, never having a little one again and I just feel I have more space in my heart for another baby.

im fully aware I am beyond lucky to have 2 healthy babies, and I do try and tell myself this when I feel down about not being able to have another.

has anyone got any tips if they experienced thus?

I hope I don't come across as disrespectful or anything that is truly not my intention

Also just realised this should have gone in advice thread!

 

[Heyyall123]

I’m going threw the same , but I want number 3 and other half don’t . But I try and think of positive how lucky I am and how a third could upset the balance etc and would be needed a new house another car etc . But I can’t help my heart just the same as you has space for one more . It’s so hard I have no advice too give x

 

[Jdottt13]

Me too. Well I have a 3 year old and a 5 month old so wouldn’t want one any time soon but my partner is adamant he wants no more. I somewhat agree and like you we financially can’t afford a third, but I think I’m having trouble saying it out loud as that almost finalises it and the thought of not being pregnant and giving birth again and enjoying that new born bubble does make me sad! (Im one of the weird ones who love giving birth lol) I’m the first of my friends to have babies and I know that when their time comes I’m going to be jel even tho I already have my own I do wonder, if money was no object to us if my partner would have more, or if he just feels that 2 is enough to handle
(Same as u I don’t want anyone reading this to think I am ungrateful for my two, they are my world and I thank my stars each day that I have them. I can’t even begin to imagine how heartbreaking it must be to have fertility & ttc issues)

 

[Charl28]

Im the same. I have two boys aged 6 & 2... I’m 30 years old & our wedding has now been pushed back to 2022, I never wanted a third but the last few months I have changed my mind, but I also think it’s a huge jump! Does anyone have any positive experiences? Or should I not bother

 

[nothingtosee]

Im the same. I have two boys aged 6 & 2... I’m 30 years old & our wedding has now been pushed back to 2022, I never wanted a third but the last few months I have changed my mind, but I also think it’s a huge jump! Does anyone have any positive experiences? Or should I not bother

I have 3 girls. 6, 4 & 1. My little one just slotted in. It’s like we’ve always had her.
I found the only annoying thing about having a third is you need a bigger car.

 

[Pagger]

It's somewhat comforting to see I'm not the only one feeling this way! In all reality I don't think I'm organised enough to have 3 kids my husband said who knows in 5 years time we could be in a better position and have one then. Maybe if we win the lottery! Haha

 

[Charl28]

It's somewhat comforting to see I'm not the only one feeling this way! In all reality I don't think I'm organised enough to have 3 kids my husband said who knows in 5 years time we could be in a better position and have one then. Maybe if we win the lottery! Haha

Yes winning the lottery would help

I have 3 girls. 6, 4 & 1. My little one just slotted in. It’s like we’ve always had her.
I found the only annoying thing about having a third is you need a bigger car.

Thankyou for the positive message! In 2/3 years time I will swap to a bigger car anyway so shouldn’t be a problem! We need to get married first & I want to enjoy my honeymoon, then who knows

 

[Platypusfattypus]

I always wanted three, even before I had children. Circumstances happened and we ended up with an 8 year gap between my second and third but it's worked out perfectly for us. And we didn't need a bigger car as the older two were out of bulky car seats. I had my heart set on three and if I had not had my third I would have always felt that I hadn't completed my family though obviously I would have been more then happy with my two children.

However after my third was born I wanted a fourth. I had bad mental health after my third and felt I had been cheated out of that newborn bubble. I was told there was a risk of psychosis if I had another and my family really didn't want anymore after it all. The finality of it all made me feel like I needed to have another if that makes sense. But when they turned three that feeling went and now I'd hate to have another. I do sometimes feel sad not to be pregnant again, breastfeed again or give birth again but I really don't want another child. I do get jealous of people being pregnant but it's only a fleeting feeling. My family is perfect and I'm enjoying watching them grow.

 

[Kim Mild]

We decided to have a third child. We decided to go for it , even before we moved to a bigger house . Then the pandemic happened . It feels like baby has always been here.

We had to get a people carrier. Normal cars were too much of a squeeze to fit someone in the back between 2 car seats.

What makes you think you can't afford another child ? We don't have a lot of money but we get a regular income so just take everything as it comes.

 

[Octopies]

Hi
I know this is an old thread but I wanted some advice about wanting another baby.
I have a 7 month old and I’ve started to feel a longing for another baby. It’s like a punch in the gut!
I have started to avoid social media posts about
Pregnancy and newborns as it stirs up these feelings in me.
my house is a total tit tip from being on mat leave and I’m not very organised so I’m not exactly smashing motherhood but I just adored being pregnant and love being a mum.
I think we could afford to have another but when they’re older probably couldn’t go on as many holidays etc. We have enough space just about.
I just don’t know if this is a longing to have a newborn or another child (ie am I just mourning my baby getting bigger?!!)
Does this feeling ever go away or is this just part of being a mother

 

[Justreading]

Hi
I know this is an old thread but I wanted some advice about wanting another baby.
I have a 7 month old and I’ve started to feel a longing for another baby. It’s like a punch in the gut!
I have started to avoid social media posts about
Pregnancy and newborns as it stirs up these feelings in me.
my house is a total tit tip from being on mat leave and I’m not very organised so I’m not exactly smashing motherhood but I just adored being pregnant and love being a mum.
I think we could afford to have another but when they’re older probably couldn’t go on as many holidays etc. We have enough space just about.
I just don’t know if this is a longing to have a newborn or another child (ie am I just mourning my baby getting bigger?!!)
Does this feeling ever go away or is this just part of being a mother

I have 2 children. We have quite a big gap between them. When my eldest was a baby, I really wanted another, was really broody. We decided to wait, as time went on I wanted one less. We discussed it as a couple and decided to have one more, for sibling company etc, tried for a while and obviously as time went on I couldn't wait. He was born and was, and still is amazing and the final piece of the puzzle.

But when he was a baby I really wanted another again! I was desperate. But obviously we decided not to, and as time has gone on that feeling has gone away. My youngest is 4 and I have no desire to have more!

I think you're never more broody then when you have a baby, you can see them changing personality and learning skills every day and just want time to stop! But I think that broody feeling does go away the older they get. I still have the odd day where I think ahhh wouldn't it be lovely, but that is very rare and never lasts, ultimately its gone now the baby stage has gone

 

[Vee6]

I think there may be some hormonal reason to long for another baby when you have a baby. The whole of the first year of my first babies life I longed for another. We decided to go for a two year gap. And the first six months of the seconds life I really wanted another. It was so intense. My other half said no more. Four years on I still would have liked a third, but in reality I don’t think I would cope, the sleepless nights would have been too much. Holidays not affordable for us, new car ect.

 

[Web30]

Hi
I know this is an old thread but I wanted some advice about wanting another baby.
I have a 7 month old and I’ve started to feel a longing for another baby. It’s like a punch in the gut!
I have started to avoid social media posts about
Pregnancy and newborns as it stirs up these feelings in me.
my house is a total tit tip from being on mat leave and I’m not very organised so I’m not exactly smashing motherhood but I just adored being pregnant and love being a mum.
I think we could afford to have another but when they’re older probably couldn’t go on as many holidays etc. We have enough space just about.
I just don’t know if this is a longing to have a newborn or another child (ie am I just mourning my baby getting bigger?!!)
Does this feeling ever go away or is this just part of being a mother

My daugthers 7 and we dont plan on anymore, but sometimes when i see how independant shes getting it makes me want another, but i actually think its me wanting her not to grow up rather then wanting another baby.

 

[Suzesnooze]

Hi
I know this is an old thread but I wanted some advice about wanting another baby.
I have a 7 month old and I’ve started to feel a longing for another baby. It’s like a punch in the gut!
I have started to avoid social media posts about
Pregnancy and newborns as it stirs up these feelings in me.
my house is a total tit tip from being on mat leave and I’m not very organised so I’m not exactly smashing motherhood but I just adored being pregnant and love being a mum.
I think we could afford to have another but when they’re older probably couldn’t go on as many holidays etc. We have enough space just about.
I just don’t know if this is a longing to have a newborn or another child (ie am I just mourning my baby getting bigger?!!)
Does this feeling ever go away or is this just part of being a mother

Have you always wanted more than one baby? If so, then go for it. I always wanted 3 and that's how many I had. I also think it's easier to have them close together in age than wait say 4 or 5 years and go back to nappies etc again!

 

[Octopies]

Have you always wanted more than one baby? If so, then go for it. I always wanted 3 and that's how many I had. I also think it's easier to have them close together in age than wait say 4 or 5 years and go back to nappies etc again!

No, I never wanted any then lockdown happened and had a surprise baby but I’m an only child and don’t want my daughter to be so, yes, eventually would like more! Yes agree hve heard closer together can be easier in long run (‘easier’ - I know never easy haha)

 

[Suzesnooze]

No, I never wanted any then lockdown happened and had a surprise baby but I’m an only child and don’t want my daughter to be so, yes, eventually would like more! Yes agree hve heard closer together can be easier in long run (‘easier’ - I know never easy haha)

Aw! How are you finding it then?

It never really gets easier and wait until they're teenagers...bloody nightmare! It makes you pine for when they were babies again and couldn't answer back!

 

[Charl28]

Have you always wanted more than one baby? If so, then go for it. I always wanted 3 and that's how many I had. I also think it's easier to have them close together in age than wait say 4 or 5 years and go back to nappies etc again!

How do you find having three? I have two boys 6 & 3. We get married nxt year, and I’m debating after the wedding trying for a third, a part of me doesn’t want to regret not going for it but another part of me thinks both my boys are growing up & I will have some life back! I’m really stuck on what to do it crosses my mind everyday

 

[Suzesnooze]

How do you find having three? I have two boys 6 & 3. We get married nxt year, and I’m debating after the wedding trying for a third, a part of me doesn’t want to regret not going for it but another part of me thinks both my boys are growing up & I will have some life back! I’m really stuck on what to do it crosses my mind everyday

I got married when mine were 5 and 3 and it was then I decided I wanted another (my husband wanted as many as I was willing to have!). Took a while though as I was late 30’s by then but by the time my third was born my other two were nearly 7 and 5 so both at school and both self sufficient really and they loved helping with the baby!

I was glad I decided to have three. No regrets other than house not really big enough but we made do!

 

[Octopies]

Aw! How are you finding it then?

It never really gets easier and wait until they're teenagers...bloody nightmare! It makes you pine for when they were babies again and couldn't answer back!

Not to make the thread about me (lol) but I am just loving it beyond belief. Even though harder than I imagined. I didn’t think I’d be a very good mum, I’m not the most patient person, but I am now. Just so much fun every day.

But three sounds ace! 3 is the magic number I think! If I won the lottery I’d have 6!! When you don’t have to worry about money / childcare etc!