The Chateau Diaries #32 Church Of Stephinology: Crotch For Cash

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TITLE -- The Chateau Diaries # 32 Church of Stephinology : Crotch For Cash
Thank you @ploppityplop2 for the new title suggestion :m :m :m :m :m :m :m
Thank you @Hercule P for compiling a Chateau dictionary! and updates
Thanks to @ploppityplop2 for the intro.
Thanks to @MojoDublin and @Rory for Glossaries.



CD - The Chateau Diaries

Tarts boudoir - Chateau de Lalande
HMN - heap in the middle of nowhere
Flat 34B - bolt hole 🕳 SJ 🇬🇧

LOTL/LOTLL - Lady of the (Lost) Lake, aka Stephanie (b.1975)
SSB- She Who Shouts from the balcony, SJ
QBC- Queen of bed chambers - SJ
MB - Madame Boneyparts -SJ
SJ - Stephanie Jarvis
Fanny - Stephanie Jarvis

MMAF - Mad Man's Arse Face, i.e. mummy
Mini Apron - Isabelle Jarvis (nee Biggio, b.1942) married 1962/3 to Derek Jarvis, widowed 2009, married to Percy Atfield year???

Potty/MP - Michael Potts
Cinder-Ruth- MPotts current squeeze Ruth Kelly (b.1981)

Nitti/Nutty - Nati Oliveto

Floral Roadkill (FRK / RK) - Marie Wiik (b.1991)

BJJ - Baby Jesus Jeans, aka Philip Janssen
PP (Nostril of Lalande) - Prince Philip
UH - Uriah Heep - Philip
Renfield - Philip

MP/MP2/MPK - Michael Petherick (b.1986)
MOLD: Man Of LOST Design - Michael Petherick
Crybaby - Michael Petherick
Sir Trotter BDSM - Michael Petherick
Teabag Trotter - Michael Petherick
Master - Swedish director of 🎥 Elias Truedsson
BS - Billy Spielberg - Billy Petherick (b.1990)
Trotter, Petherdick - any Petherick family reference
Ma Trotter - Sherrie Petherick
Pa Trotter - Mr Petherick Esq
PILF: The only Petherick I'd like to be filmed with - Pa 'Mick' Trotter

Dear Brenda/BG - Brenda Gibbons (superfan/Facebook admin) from Donegal Ireland
Karen Cbomb - other superfan/admin, Canada
Jumpsuit Jill - rabid serial deletor of unfan comments on premier 💴 chat - Jill Scott, New Zealand

Donegals - Limericks (renamed in honour of Dear Brenda)
Agents - Tattlers who find out juicy background info

Chat O (or variations) - Chateau (how Brenda says it)
“BuyMeACoffee” - give me money (no, really, give me money, I really need it)

MBNS;GF - more boring narc stuff; gimme facts

PSDFHB - princess 👸 shouting down from her balcony
PRSDBP - princess 👸 in her robe shouting down from her balcony at the peasants

Wet Blanket - Fun hoover
Mickey Dodger - Woman who avoids sexual encounters

Thanks to @Rory for the SSB Main Squeeze Glossary:

1. Gregory Mason Clark - Husband and boyfriend, on and off at uni. SJ approx 18
2. Nic Larkin - apparently just friends at uni (but also dated according to CB?)
3. Married Husband 22-24??? (wedding registered in July 1999, she was 23 at the time)
4. Michael Potts met through Oliver Strong on and off 10 years. Open relationship in the end. Buys Chateau 2005 during relationship age 29.
5. Edmond Fokker van Craayenstein (player in tight trousers who pretends to be an aristocrat-BF with guy who said "let the 80 years-olds die off")
6. Mason Dwinell on and off (last we heard he is still staring at the sun?)
7. Ludwig Norweigner (otherwise known as Nordic Weirdo, alcoholic friend unceremoniously dumped at the train station without a ticket)
8. James Jardine (turned out to be "too much" for the girl who never has enough)
9. Daniel Hengeveld (nicknamed Druggy Daniel, because of his not so secret habits. IJ was furious about that romance and the fact that he introduced narcotics into the shat-o. Christmas 2016)
10. Various volunteers ad nauseum (bread oven guy Walton, Christian We etc.)
11. BJJ (any port in a storm, eh Stephanie?)


Château dictionary

BasMinger:
Château de Basmaignée/aka Trotter Towers,🏰 the spin off Vlogs of the Trotters. @Jeeves

Begmania: château de Basmaignée @Le Comte de Monte Cristo

Cadge: Cadeaux at the Châteaux' channel @Definitely Maybe

Dadification: The attribution of Derek's nature or characteristics at each and every opportunity. 👀 @Jeeves

(a) Derek, to be a Derek: someone who is obsessed with boobs @Gibson

(a) Fouquet: as in to pull a Fouquet. The act of using public funds to finance once lavish lifestyle, in honour of the Great Nicolas Fouquet, Louis the XIV’s finance minister and builder of celebrated Château of Vaux-le-Vicomte (the most ostentatious Château of its time, pre-dating the Versailles renovations) who finished his life in jail being accused by the King of mismanagement of funds. 💰@justcommonsense

GAG: Grab a Gift @Mrs O 🎁

Gustavo: male prostitute with expensive tastes 🕺🍾🎁💎 @Hercule P

High Priestess Skankadankadingdong: SJ's name @lalablahblah

Madrid syndrom: stricto sensu, long journey to have some bedroom activities in a very expensive hotel in the middle of a pandemy ✈🧢👬🍸 🕶🍾
Flexible version, long journey to have some bedroom activities in a very expensive place 😏🍹@Hercule P

Petherfending: defending Petherick @Joy no toile

Selmobile: Selmar’s camper-van vehicle of love and adventure🚐 @Princess and the Pea or @Gibson ?????

Spored: bored with Spode, I am so spored right now, or Diesel is spored; he wants his old dog dish back. @ProfessorPlum

Stephanese: What would be your definition? :) @mummydearest

Stephfending: when I actually do feel the need to defend SJ. @Milre

Stephiphany: a sudden awareness of the chance to swindle @ProfessorPlum

Trolliosis: a debilitating condition caused by Tattlers asking questions or making observations relating to grifting @lalablahblah

To Versailles: to behave like Marie-Antoinette (Sofia Coppola’s dancing, dressing-up, gambling, romanticising nature version of Marie-Antoinette) As in They Versailled again all night yesterday! 💅💃👠👑💎@justcommonsense

To Versailles up: to make Versailles-inspired design choices that, depending on taste and budget, may result in a nouveau-riche or tat-like look. As in They Versailled up the entrance, it looks [insert preferred adjective]! 💍🛎🎇👑@justcommonsense




prick.jpeg



ArtWork @Linus

church.jpg

ARTWORK @Linus

the chateau Diaries #32 C.O.S

❤ The chateau diaries #32 C.O.D

Crotch for cash 💵
Author ✍ @ploppityplop2 winner 29 votes

😆The Chateau Diaries #32: Welcome to Derek's Dream Kitchen (Warning: Explicit Tile Work).
Author ✍ @Marquis de Potpourri


👍The Chateau Diaries #32:
Welcome to Derek's Naked Dream
Author ✍ @sandro37


😮 The chateau diaries #32
We are Spartacus (Clara)
Author ✍ @JoynoToile

:sick:" Chateau Diaries #32 - Starring She who Shouts from Balconies - Written and Directed by Tattle " suggested by @Oh!Idon'tknow

the pole is live and can be added to

one vote ...we can add more later - just NOT to this pole .
Thanks everyone
 
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Thank-you for new tbread set-up.
Did anyone else notice BJJ wearing a mask on his elbow? What is it with Dutch people not knowing how to wear a mask - first Andi now BJJ.
 
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'which makes me to wonder if they have many spiders in France? With the doors and windows open .....? 🕷'

Lots of spiders in France. Especially in the deep countryside and in the middle of nowhere like Lalande !
 
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From the last thread :
Bats! They are protected and difficult to move.
Would explain a lot regarding the inhabitants of the Shitoo...probably inhaling all that lovely Guano and pee. ;)

sadie must be 1991 as she has just had her 30th birthday.
Is she only 30? Good grief! I would have said 35/6.
 
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The Q & A vlog was so unprofessional, a compete lack of preparation, faffing around for ages, trying to set it up in the middle of the vlog. Both BJJ and Steve could have sorted it all out in advance. Also, how ridiculous and disrespectful to her audience to start with BJJ doing her hair; a middle aged female employer getting her hair curled by a young male employee and then she brushes it out in front of the camera afterwards. How more unprofessional could she become? She has said before, as many YTubers do, that making vlogs is her job, she gets a kind of salary from the ad revenue, not to mention all the patrons' money but she can't even prepare properly. No wonder she has never had a real job, she wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes with her lack of a work ethic or professionalism.

Also, why did Nic have to bale her out in the early days when he was working for a living? She, no doubt, inherited a fortune. We now know her family had a separate family home as well as owning two large nursing homes. Nic must be dafter than he looks with the bag over his head!

She makes me think of a 20 year old, just getting their own flat and suddenly realising that they have to pay for boring things such as rent, gas, electricity and water, whereas, in the past, their parents paid for all the boring overheads and they could spend all their pocket money on fun. The trouble is this is a 43 year old who can't be bothered to pay for repairs to her own home and just uses her own money on travel and her hedonistic lifestyle, letting strangers pay for the boring but necessary stuff. She will never grow up, yet IJ says she does not have psychological problems! She probably said that as she thinks people would blame her parenting for any problems SJ might have.

'which makes me to wonder if they have many spiders in France? With the doors and windows open .....? 🕷'

Lots of spiders in France. Especially in the deep countryside and in the middle of nowhere like Lalande !
Spiders love dusty, cluttered places where they can hide, that place must be full of cobwebs and spiders!
 
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In the live Steph said she had no plans to start a go fund me for a swimming pool. Did off the cuff, saying if a wing burned down perhaps. Why doesn't she have smoke alarms? A stocking smoldering Philip discovered (on the way to fondle cutlery) the tea towel set alit when Steph cooking, and the poor muppet burning her toast. Wonder what type of insurance does she have?
 
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@MojoDublin are you still able to edit this to b.1988?
Sadie is born in 1990
Also, the husband's name is Gregory Francis Mannion Clark (whether this is an intentional typo or not, I do not know).

@MojoDublin Cool if you could include Marquis' Bridgerton photo art to match his name, otherwise the 2nd photo was done by me ;)
 
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Am I reading too much into the look exchanged between SJ and BBJ when she added "and chill' to suggesting Natti watch Netflix.

The vlog was an example of the phrase "Fail to plan, plan to fail" and not just the unpreparedness at the start.
 
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The Q & A vlog was so unprofessional, a compete lack of preparation, faffing around for ages, trying to set it up in the middle of the vlog. Both BJJ and Steve could have sorted it all out in advance. Also, how ridiculous and disrespectful to her audience to start with BJJ doing her hair; a middle aged female employer getting her hair curled by a young male employee and then she brushes it out in front of the camera afterwards. How more unprofessional could she become? She has said before, as many YTubers do, that making vlogs is her job, she gets a kind of salary from the ad revenue, not to mention all the patrons' money but she can't even prepare properly. No wonder she has never had a real job, she wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes with her lack of a work ethic or professionalism.

Also, why did Nic have to bale her out in the early days when he was working for a living? She, no doubt, inherited a fortune. We now know her family had a separate family home as well as owning two large nursing homes. Nic must be dafter than he looks with the bag over his head!

She makes me think of a 20 year old, just getting their own flat and suddenly realising that they have to pay for boring things such as rent, gas, electricity and water, whereas, in the past, their parents paid for all the boring overheads and they could spend all their pocket money on fun. The trouble is this is a 43 year old who can't be bothered to pay for repairs to her own home and just uses her own money on travel and her hedonistic lifestyle, letting strangers pay for the boring but necessary stuff. She will never grow up, yet IJ says she does not have psychological problems! She probably said that as she thinks people would blame her parenting for any problems SJ might have.


Spiders love dusty, cluttered places where they can hide, that place must be full of cobwebs and spiders!
@Espe I logged in late for the Q&A. Was she really having baby Jesus doing her hair ? Good God 😳
 
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Watched BBC antiques roadshow tonight. SJ would have loved the original 18th c French dress valued at over £2k
 
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Today’s Q&A was typical. Racking in a couple of hundred dollars from Super Chats is always a nice way to spend a Sunday.
why did funds dry up from her London apartment? Couldn’t she rent it?
 
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Today’s Q&A was typical. Racking in a couple of hundred dollars from Super Chats is always a nice way to spend a Sunday.
why did funds dry up from her London apartment? Couldn’t she rent it?
Covid shut it down. Think the monthly trip was to collect rent and spend it on tat.
 
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