The Chateau Diaries #18 Porky mitts and porky pies

[Incognito Chatelaine]

Thanks to @La Brocanteuse for the wonderful new thread title.

Thanks to @Laurent for the voting post.

Thanks to @MojoDublin and @Rory for Glossaries.

Glossary

CD - The Chateau Diaries
Tarts boudoir - Chateau de Lalande
HNW - heap in the middle of nowhere
Flat 34B - bolt hole SJ

LOTL/LOTLL - Lady of the (Lost) Lake, aka Stephanie (b.1975)
SSB- She Who Shouts from the balcony, SJ
QBC- Queen of bed chambers - SJ
MB - Madame Boneyparts -SJ
SJ - Stephanie Jarvis
Fanny - Stephanie Jarvis

MMAF - Mad Man's Arse Face, i.e. mummy
Mini Apron - Isabelle Jarvis (nee Biggio) married 1962/3

Potty/MP - Michael Potts
Cinder-Ruth- MPotts current squeeze Ruth Kelly

Nitti/Nutty - Nati Oliveto

Floral Roadkill (FRK / RK) - Marie Wiik

BJJ - Baby Jesus Jeans, aka Philip Janssen
PP (Nostril of Lalande) - Prince Philip
UH - Uriah Heep - Philip
Renfield - Philip

MP/MP2/MPK - Michael Petherick
MOLD: Man Of LOST Design - Michael Petherick
Crybaby - Michael Petherick
Sir Trotter BDSM - Micheal Petherick
Master - Swedish director of Elias
BS - Billy Spielberg - Billy Petherick
Trotter, Petherdick - any Petherick family reference
Ma Trotter - Sherrie Petherick
Pa Trotter - Mr Petherick Esq
PILF: The only Petherick I'd like to be filmed with - Pa 'Mick' Trotter

Dear Brenda/BG - Brenda Gibbons (superfan/Facebook admin) from Donegal Ireland
Karen Cbomb - other superfan/admin, Canada
Jumpsuit Jill - rabid serial deletor of unfan comments on premier chat - Jill Scott, New Zealand

Donegals - Limericks (renamed in honour of Dear Brenda)
Agents - Tattlers who find out juicy background info

Chat O (or variations) - Chateau (how Brenda says it)
“BuyMeACoffee” - give me money (no, really, give me money, I really need it)

MBNS;GF - more boring narc stuff; gimme facts

PSDFHB - princess shouting down from her balcony
PRSDBP - princess in her robe shouting down from her balcony at the peasants

Wet Blanket - Fun hoover
Mickey Dodger - Woman who avoids sexual encounters

Thanks to @Rory for the SSB Main Squeeze Glossary:

1. Gregory Mason Clark - Husband and boyfriend, on and off at uni. SJ approx 18
2. Nic Larkin - apparently just friends at uni (but also dated according to CB?)
3. Married Husband 22-24??? (wedding registered in July 1999, she was 23 at the time)
4. Michael Potts met through Oliver Strong on and off 10 years. Open relationship in the end. Buys Chateau during relationship age 29.
5. Edmond Fokker van Craayenstein (player in tight trousers who pretends to be an aristocrat-BF with guy who said "let the 80 years-olds die off")
6. Mason Dwinell on and off (last we heard he is still staring at the sun?)
7. Ludwig Norweigner (otherwise known as Nordic Weirdo, alcoholic friend unceremoniously dumped at the train station without a ticket)
8. James Jardine (turned out to be "too much" for the girl who never has enough)
9. Daniel Hengeveld (nicknamed Druggy Daniel, because of his not so secret habits. IJ was furious about that romance and the fact that he introduced narcotics into the shat-o. Christmas 2016)
10. Various volunteers ad nauseum (bread oven guy Walton, Christian We etc.)
11. BJJ (any port in a storm, eh Stephanie?)

 

[La Brocanteuse]

Wow! Thank you @Incognito Chatelaine ! And thank you @Laurent for coming up with such a great voting system!

 

[Incognito Chatelaine]

Wow! Thank you @Incognito Chatelaine ! And thank you @Laurent for coming up with such a great voting system!

Pleasure!

 

[ComtesseRose]

Anybody know when it was painted?

Throwing in my two cents.
The painting reminds me much of Pop Art, a mixture of early Andy Warhol (129 Die in Jet!) and Roy Lichtenstein (Drowning Girl).
It is a curious, miminal and modernist take on landscape painting or beach painting (think impressionists, like Monet and Krøyer)
However it's been so warped into a different perspective it comes across as a comic still (bande dessinée) à la Tintin.
Question is, did he cheapen the impressionism of the painting by going bande dessinée style, or did he elavate the bande desinée style and put it up along side the impressionist...?

 

[oldandoverit]

I know the first comment was posted earlier but cannot find or remember if the 2nd was added. Apologies to whoever originally posted.

 

[lolander]

Once you find one it is easy to identify another. It is hard for those who have not encountered one to believe just how duplicitous they are. She is IMO a classic covert narcissist. She survives on emotional fuel admiration, adulation, praise, empathy, compassion, attention, kindness, physical affection & validation. But there is never enough. They initially are convinced that the new supply is the one who will be the perfect one - male or female doesn't matter. At the start the new one is treated as the pet, the favourite & put on a pedestal. But then they do something not quite perfect & then they're not such good fuel any more. So a new one must be found. You can see the pattern with Marie, MPK & now Philip. 3 stages idealise, devalue then discard. A person is as much use to them as a kettle. Once it starts to go wrong then it is time to get a new one. The absolute desperation that they must be in control, that the mask must never slip to show who they really are is extremely stressful for them. This explains the boozing - they usually have a habit of some sort as they are anxious a lot of the time. So sunny SJ whose fave colour is yellow knows that inside it is all black.

I can't argue with your comment. She's just what you described.
I've given her the benefit of a doubt, since the new volunteers are strangers who need special attention, support and care to settle in. And for the vlogs she needs to act and put her best foot forward, in the long run you just realize her high principles aren't followed out of pure selfishness or fear of conflict. Which is human, but I'll stop finding excuses for her behavior, it's not worth it. All her favorites (what we've seen on YT) seem to have an emotional trauma in their past; Nati was in an abusive relationship, Marie's father was an alcoholic and she was bullied at school. I don't even want to know what kind of emotional baggage Philip is carrying. Her long staying volunteers are all people who haven't found their place in the world and SSB is a radiant personality, it must be wonderful to be lifted on her pedestal, you must feel like you've finally come home. Until the new one comes and it gets really cold.

 

[TheTaxInspector]

I don't even want to know what kind of emotional baggage Philip is carrying.

Or anything else he's carrying for that matter...

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

Look at my street! It's full of old townhouses that need updating!
I can't wait to start my Patreon and unashamedly exploit people, ask them to send help to renovate my parents' townhouse.

 

[Mummy Dearest]

That's called showbusiness, others call it acting.

Everything about her is an act (manipulation). The newest vlog was the ultimate act. Everything was regurgitated from previous vlogs, (poor memory, my ass), with the exception of the inheritance. It was nothing more than a ploy to reel in new viewers for Patreon and passive-aggressively answer tattler questions simultaneously.

Everything about her is a character. Did she always speak so posh or is it an Eliza Doolittle situation where she learned to play the part to sound higher class than what she was? An adult calling her parents Mummy and Daddy tells me she refused to grow up and possibly used it as a way to get what she wants. IDK, is that a common British way to refer to parents? In the US, it’s uncommon for an adult to call their parents Mommy and Daddy (you’d probably get laughed at or side-eyed). She’s constantly putting on a one woman show for the camera and everyone around her. I’d be exhausted being around her, I get exhausted just watching the vlogs. She’s like a hyperactive shih tzu that runs around yapping and jumping on people for attention. The only way to shut her up is to put a drink in her hand and distract her with something shiny.

I just don’t get an ounce of authenticity from her, always has to be the loudest, always the most adored, and can’t seem to let anyone else shine. She lacks humility and compassion. Has anyone ever seen her pet Diesel? Thinking about it, I don’t believe I have. When has she done anything for anyone else that doesn’t directly benefit her? Does she have real friends or are they friendships of convenience? Surely she would have attempted to risk COVID to see her BFF, MPK. But instead she risks COVID to visit Anna and Philip? All because Marie wants to take them flowers? I would have put my foot down and said “I haven’t seen my BFF in months because of COVID, I’m definitely not traveling to a strangers chateau because you want to take them flowers”. But not SJ, the visit was for content and cross promotion. I don’t even think her and MPK are as close as they want us to believe. Friendship of convenience, when they are together, they each get content and cross promotion.

Every move is calculated and motivated by one thing...money.

 

[arwensgal1975]

I know the first comment was posted earlier but cannot find or remember if the 2nd was added. Apologies to whoever originally posted.

I wouldn't go as far as calling Stephanie his employer, but way it's actually disturbing behaviour that is for her. Of course Stephanie herself is very immature so she probably, and sadly doesn't see anything wrong with it.

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

That de-escalated quickly, from "more power to your endeavors" to "it's unfair to ask strangers to pay..."

MP/MP2/MPK - Michael Petherick
MOLD: Man Of LOST Design - Michael Petherick
Crybaby - Michael Petherick
Sir Trotter BDSM - Micheal Petherick
Master - Swedish director of Elias
BS - Billy Spielberg - Billy Petherick
Trotter, Petherdick - any Petherick family reference
Ma Trotter - Sherrie Petherick
Pa Trotter - Mr Petherick Esq
PILF: The only Petherick I'd like to be filmed with - Pa 'Mick' Trotter

Where's the new nickname: "Teabag Trotter"?

 

[Frances Nicole]

Not able to fast forward today, but suffice it to say many on tattle were not swayed by the latest vlog!

 

[oldandoverit]

I wouldn't go as far as calling Stephanie his employer, but way it's actually disturbing behaviour that is for her. Of course Stephanie herself is very immature so she probably, and sadly doesn't see anything wrong with it.

Oh but she is his employer, she announced she hired Phillip

 

[Gibson]

Anybody know when it was painted?

Throwing in my two cents.
The painting reminds me much of Pop Art, a mixture of early Andy Warhol (129 Die in Jet!) and Roy Lichtenstein (Drowning Girl).
It is a curious, miminal and modernist take on landscape painting or beach painting (think impressionists, like Monet and Krøyer)
However it's been so warped into a different perspective it comes across as a comic still (bande dessinée) à la Tintin.
Question is, did he cheapen the impressionism of the painting by going bande dessinée style, or did he elavate the bande desinée style and put it up along side the impressionist...?

The perspective is all wrong as the viewer struggles to find a focus.

I wouldn't go as far as calling Stephanie his employer, but way it's actually disturbing behaviour that is for her. Of course Stephanie herself is very immature so she probably, and sadly doesn't see anything wrong with it.

In years to come further disturbing behaviour will occur as Philly morphs into Steph or vice versa...

 

[witchgrass]

It's crazy to me that the top Patreon earner is Chapo Trap House, a socialist podcast that generates about $165k a month. I don't see anything about them donating to charity either. Most of the top earners on Patreon are podcasts with very low overhead. I feel like Stephanie's earnings are just going to keep going up. It's pretty fascinating, this culture of bypassing tv and radio stations.

 

[Gibson]

It's crazy to me that the top Patreon earner is Chapo Trap House, a socialist podcast that generates about $165k a month. I don't see anything about them donating to charity either. Most of the top earners on Patreon are podcasts with very low overhead. I feel like Stephanie's earnings are just going to keep going up. It's pretty fascinating, this culture of bypassing tv and radio stations.

The same for YouTube. They are like Tattle in that they rely on advertising for funding revenue. It's probably cheaper than paying well known channels. The more popular the vlog, the higher the revenue and the spin offs.
An article I read today about a YouTuber who can hula hoop has millions of followers on there. Steph has a long way to go to get to that level of following.

 

[Mrs O]

I have finally watched the latest vlog of ‘You tube saved my chateau’. I have to hand it to SJ that she has a marvellous spy network - CIA/M15/6/Mossad would be proud to have these agents! Almost all the queries we have made she has addressed - almost!
* She still hasn’t answered why didn’t she get a job to help with renovation work - like a lot of other chateau owners have done or are still doing - after her father died and she has spent her inheritance? Her mother (and Percy) were at lalaland in the summer to oversee the B&B she she was surplus to requirements.

To clear up a few questions from previous pages that I have just read:

She didn’t have to pay for her tuition at Oxford. When SJ attended tuition was free, She needed finances for accommodation, food, clothes and of course drink!! Which I assume her parents paid for unless she managed to fiddle a student grant (which you didn’t need to lay back).

Inheritance gifts - are taxable in UK - unless seven years elapses before the death of the donator, Her father’s gift of a flat (after she sold her original one) would also attract tax. As she’s never worked he must have also bought her the first flat.

As someone has already pointed out, most of her vlogs could be recorded using a tripod - cheaper and quieter than present camera person.

With the money now being generated she could have a professional person edit the vlogs. She just sends all the recording online and they could be professionally edited, getting rid of unwanted background noises (snorting etc,) and proper music, intro etc. There wouldn’t be all the jerking of scenes in today’s vlogs. She would then have more time to work on the renovation of her chateau!

If MPotts bought into the Chateau for £300k in 2019 where’s the money? Why hasn’t she used that for repairs/renovations etc. Or was that all spent on holidays / clothes and even more holidays?

Quoting British ‘country houses’ as an example!! They are real historic buildings/castles with hundreds of rooms and priceless real antiques and paintings. They are not a summer house filled with furniture/carpets/crockery from second hand shops and junk stores! No comparison SJ I’m very sorry.

 

[lalablahblah]

I don't understand French hiring or visa process. Nati and Phillip are both on work visas right. From what I gather SJ is supposed to hire French citizens first. Managing contractors and running a shatoo can't be that specific or specialized she can't hire a French citizen. Holding a camera can't either. So how is that working out with the visas?

 

[Pno]

I makes total sense that in 16 years the Shato value has remained stagnated. Remember the lake that went bye bye? Who would want to buy a HMN with a swampy bog out front. And she thinks it will be 100k to reverse her idiocy but god knows how much more and I’m sure there will be massive consequences of all of that water returning and effecting the water table. Who knows maybe that crumbling terrace will end up floating!

 

[lalablahblah]

I have finally watched the latest vlog of ‘You tube saved my chateau’. I have to hand it to SJ that she has a marvellous spy network - CIA/M15/6/Mossad would be proud to have these agents! Almost all the queries we have made she has addressed - almost!
* She still hasn’t answered why didn’t she get a job to help with renovation work - like a lot of other chateau owners have done or are still doing - after her father died and she has spent her inheritance? Her mother (and Percy) were at lalaland in the summer to oversee the B&B she she was surplus to requirements.

To clear up a few questions from previous pages that I have just read:

She didn’t have to pay for her tuition at Oxford. When SJ attended tuition was free, She needed finances for accommodation, food, clothes and of course drink!! Which I assume her parents paid for unless she managed to fiddle a student grant (which you didn’t need to lay back).

Inheritance gifts - are taxable in UK - unless seven years elapses before the death of the donator, Her father’s gift of a flat (after she sold her original one) would also attract tax. As she’s never worked he must have also bought her the first flat.

As someone has already pointed out, most of her vlogs could be recorded using a tripod - cheaper and quieter than present camera person.

With the money now being generated she could have a professional person edit the vlogs. She just sends all the recording online and they could be professionally edited, getting rid of unwanted background noises (snorting etc,) and proper music, intro etc. There wouldn’t be all the jerking of scenes in today’s vlogs. She would then have more time to work on the renovation of her chateau!

If MPotts bought into the Chateau for £300k in 2019 where’s the money? Why hasn’t she used that for repairs/renovations etc. Or was that all spent on holidays / clothes and even more holidays?

Quoting British ‘country houses’ as an example!! They are real historic buildings/castles with hundreds of rooms and priceless real antiques and paintings. They are not a summer house filled with furniture/carpets/crockery from second hand shops and junk stores! No comparison SJ I’m very sorry.

The spy network. SJ has been here since the beginning. There are profiles that could be anyone. These profiles try to fabricate excuses for her deflecting from her behavior illegal or otherwise. Try to discredit other profiles. Other profiles that could either be SJ or her employees support such activities. If a narcacist can't control you they try to control how other people veiw you. Anyone who's questioned too much, attempted to be discredited or ganged up on those are the ones she's afraid of. Those are the ones she fears will get the dirt on her. Anytime you think a narcacist has gone low enough there is always miles of mineshaft yet to go. Always.