Starting Over

[Floopadoop]

couldn’t see a thread along these lines! Long story short I split up with my partner of 7 years the other day and I’m pretty much starting my life from square one again

I’m 33 tomorrow and I’ve gone from having someone I intended to buy a place with and have children in the next year with to moving back in with my parents 6hrs away with no friends (I do have two but neither are local!)

Just wondering if anyone else has had to do something like this? Feel like I need some positive stories or something because I’m absolutely terrified

 

[Nugget11]

Hi @Floopadoop

I’m in a very similar situation at the moment, just split with my boyfriend of 11 years and starting again with life. Not what I expected at 31 tbh.

Don’t have any helpful advice/positive stories yet but wanted to say you’re not alone!

Look after yourself and work on what you want in life. That’s basically what I’m trying to do I think

 

[yankydoo]

Hi. I was 33 and split up with my BF who I was going to move to another country with. I had left my job too so when we split I was jobless. It was devastating. I found it helpful to take it one day/week at a time and set myself small goals. Then when I started feeling better I tried to focus on the more longer term goals.

A positive of moving in with your parents is that you will save money on rent/mortgage.

I also found it quite freeing to only have to think about myself for a while - so that's another positive!

I'm now 37 and about to get married, in a great job and feel settled.

 

[Floopadoop]

Hi @Floopadoop

I’m in a very similar situation at the moment, just split with my boyfriend of 11 years and starting again with life. Not what I expected at 31 tbh.

Don’t have any helpful advice/positive stories yet but wanted to say you’re not alone!

Look after yourself and work on what you want in life. That’s basically what I’m trying to do I think

I hope you’re doing ok!

I went through this with my first boyfriend too so I know it can be done, it’s just quite daunting. Luckily at least this time I’m not horrifically heartbroken!

 

[Monkeymagic85]

I split up with my husband when I was 25, had no job as we were meant to be relocating and ended up living on my sisters sofa for 6 months!

I found a job, moved in to a house share and had the most fun ever, had some fun with a fellow housemate, 14 years later we’re still together and have a kid and a house!

Enjoy yourself, I would recommend a club/gym, just get yourself out and meet folks! Love always comes when you least expect it, just be your best self and do what you want to do while you have no one else to consider, you got this

 

[easyliketuesdayafternoon]

So sorry you're going through this but there will be light at the end of the tunnel for you! I split up with my husband at 35 and moved back in with my mum. I think I hit rock bottom, truly. But I took some time to decompress, got some therapy and took the opportunity of being at "home" to let someone look after me for a while.

Now, 2 years later, I've bought my own house, have a new partner and we're expecting a baby!

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

couldn’t see a thread along these lines! Long story short I split up with my partner of 7 years the other day and I’m pretty much starting my life from square one again

I’m 33 tomorrow and I’ve gone from having someone I intended to buy a place with and have children in the next year with to moving back in with my parents 6hrs away with no friends (I do have two but neither are local!)

Just wondering if anyone else has had to do something like this? Feel like I need some positive stories or something because I’m absolutely terrified

I'm sorry to hear you're going through this.

I have no real advice. Look at this as a fresh start. Life is so short in reality - do what makes you happy and enjoy your new found independence.

So sorry you're going through this but there will be light at the end of the tunnel for you! I split up with my husband at 35 and moved back in with my mum. I think I hit rock bottom, truly. But I took some time to decompress, got some therapy and took the opportunity of being at "home" to let someone look after me for a while.

Now, 2 years later, I've bought my own house, have a new partner and we're expecting a baby!

Therapy may also be a good idea. It can really put the mind at ease.

 

[pinkwhitered]

I’m really sorry that you’re going through this. I am 29, also split from my partner and feeling like it was a blindsided break up. I thought this was the man I would marry and have children with.
I feel so lost now and worried I won’t meet anyone again.
Things feel tough right now but I guess it gives us all a bit of comfort knowing that we aren’t alone in feeling this way!
I wish you all the best for a happy life

 

[krispykreme]

I’m really sorry that you’re going through this. I am 29, also split from my partner and feeling like it was a blindsided break up. I thought this was the man I would marry and have children with.
I feel so lost now and worried I won’t meet anyone again.
Things feel tough right now but I guess it gives us all a bit of comfort knowing that we aren’t alone in feeling this way!
I wish you all the best for a happy life

Hii!

I’m in the same boat, 28, split up with my 5 year boyfriend a month ago, we talked about marriage, were trying for a baby and now I am just completely lost and trying hard to not go back to him because he’s all i’ve known for a long time. The thoughts of dating anyone else scares me because right now I don’t want to know someone else’s favourite colour or how many siblings they have etc Trying to take this as a fresh start but I feel so hopeless right now.

 

[tbo]

How are people getting on? I feel I am on the cusp of a similar fate - 35 and been with bf for almost 10 years but he’s all but decided he doesn’t see a future and is currently ‘thinking’ about it. We don’t live together so haven’t spoken to him in about a week, want to give him the space but at the same time I’m not hanging around forever so will at some point have to contact him and see where he’s at.

Isn’t it just rubbish after so much time - hope you are all getting through your own situations.