A thread to document and discuss the challenges and chaos of making one of Jack Monroe’s many ‘recipes’.
Slopalong: Cooking with Jack Monroe
- Start date
-
- Tags
- Jack Monroe Threads Wiki
- Status
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Link to the wiki, feel free to edit or tag me and I can do the honours 
We need to
recipes for:
Vegan crackling
Afterbirth oats
And allocate the following tributes/requests from:
@Whaa? Veg peeling loaf (extra points if the creator tastes it)
@Nottonightbabe Mandarin and yogurt pasta
@Notmycat Eggy cup
Recipe ideas:
Slopalong Wiki
Surprisingly for nearly three years' of Tattle threads, the canal have not taken a forensic look across the spectrum of all of Jack's recipes / slops. We've had the odd foray into a tasting situation, but nothing consistent across all of her books and website. This is in spite of anecdotal...
tattle.life
We need to
recipes for:Vegan crackling
Afterbirth oats
And allocate the following tributes/requests from:
@Whaa? Veg peeling loaf (extra points if the creator tastes it)
@Nottonightbabe Mandarin and yogurt pasta
@Notmycat Eggy cup
Recipe ideas:
Could someone who’s more intelligent than me please put my rinsed hoops on the done list? 
don’t want anyone else to waste their precious time and hoops with it.
don’t want anyone else to waste their precious time and hoops with it. Jack Monroe #356 I can put 30p in the mortgage, Harold!
Jumping forward 7 pages and resurrecting myself from the recently deceased to please encourage any lurkers to post the actual introduction to the rinsed hoop recipe, if you felt so inclined, on Twitter. I do not tweet nor interact with the twit, but there’s plenty of folk who do! ETA just seen...
tattle.life
Genuinely have not hit "Watch" harder.
Can see Vegan crackling online, but not one from Jack. Think it's still on her to do list?Link to the wiki, feel free to edit or tag me and I can do the honours
Slopalong Wiki
Surprisingly for nearly three years' of Tattle threads, the canal have not taken a forensic look across the spectrum of all of Jack's recipes / slops. We've had the odd foray into a tasting situation, but nothing consistent across all of her books and website. This is in spite of anecdotal...tattle.life
We need to
Vegan crackling
Afterbirth oats
And allocate the following tributes/requests from:
@Whaa? Veg peeling loaf (extra points if the creator tastes it)
@Nottonightbabe Mandarin and yogurt pasta
@Notmycat Eggy cup
Recipe ideas:
ETA, from Kachoooo's Coming Soon - vegan crackling
confirmed to be rice paper April 2022 (not a JM original - stolen off interwebs.
Last edited:
I believe the afterbirth oats are a version of ‘microwave lemon curd and blueberry porridge’ from bad food and even worse days (ok ok Good Food for Bad Days). I know she states it’s a one pan recipe and the book says use a microwave but they are the same idea, I think.
Yes, indeed I know you’ll all be shocked to learn it’s a re-hash of an existing slop but there we are...and she’s done some tricksy presentation on the Twitter photo because in the book the whole lot is stirred in together but the photo she posted on Twitter shows the porridge must have been prepared in another vessel and plopped on top of the afterbirth.
Happy to be corrected, when she finally gets back from the school run and publishes it, of course
Yes, indeed I know you’ll all be shocked to learn it’s a re-hash of an existing slop but there we are...and she’s done some tricksy presentation on the Twitter photo because in the book the whole lot is stirred in together but the photo she posted on Twitter shows the porridge must have been prepared in another vessel and plopped on top of the afterbirth.
Happy to be corrected, when she finally gets back from the school run and publishes it, of course
Been grunking old threads watching all the previous slopalongs and this is a great (since deleted) one I haven’t seen before for anyone still looking for something!
What a sorry state this is
Edit: this one is evening better! STEWED STEAK ALERT
What a sorry state this is
Edit: this one is evening better! STEWED STEAK ALERT
Last edited:
I would,like the record to show that I made toffee apple oats, they most certainly were not “Hotes Oats” they were oats Hotes made. My own recipe three ingredient porridge is beyond reproach, does not attack or achieve sentience. Thankyou.
I was gonna change mine to the horrific salmon paste pasta from Lorraine but I don't think I can face it.
My OH is working Sunday so I might craft my poo then.
My OH is working Sunday so I might craft my poo then.
Do the salmon paste tender, do!
Please, for the love of LJC, can someone tell her that peaches, mangoes and mandarins are not interchangeable!
Please can someone do lingreenie?
I have to be honest that I haven’t paid much attention to Jack as always felt something was off.
I’ve just thrown up in my mouth reading this recipe intro.
It also feels a little safe.
I’ve just thrown up in my mouth reading this recipe intro.
It also feels a little safe.
Attachments
She’s saying words she doesn’t understand. Eponymous does not work in this sentence.
SLOPATHON
I'm still trying to catch up...I'm ignoring the news and personal hygiene, because this is far more important.
If no-one has done the rancid salad bag botulism pesto, I'll do that.
If that has been taken already, pick something for me. I'm veggie/awkward in various ways, but Old Harold here is a human dustbin, which will come in very handy, so anything!
xx
ETA - think I've done a chaos. Asked if this should be moved to the right thread, thankyou
I'm still trying to catch up...I'm ignoring the news and personal hygiene, because this is far more important.
If no-one has done the rancid salad bag botulism pesto, I'll do that.
If that has been taken already, pick something for me. I'm veggie/awkward in various ways, but Old Harold here is a human dustbin, which will come in very handy, so anything!
xx
ETA - think I've done a chaos. Asked if this should be moved to the right thread, thankyou
Last edited:
I think she means mane of hair rather than mania of hair as well.
SYNONYMOUS?!
Ha so embarrassing. See also walking stick comment.
Quoting myself as a ninny as I de-chaos. Thanks Mods. Have updated the Wiki. Will be doing the gram flour pasta and use me for anything sauce because a) it might be okay b) it damn well won't be as nice as the pasta sauce I make.
Thinking of doing a a Jamie £1 wonder as a comparison.
“Finely slice the aubergine”. That suggests - to me, I mean, I’m not a chef - slices of maybe a couple of millimetres’ thickness. Thinner than I’d slice a cucumber for my kids. Just why? Surely, if you’re going to blitz it, then chunks of aubergine (maybe with the skin off, IDK, again, not a chef) would work fine? It’s all just so baffling.
- Status