Single parent/working...Help?!

[JodieGreen123]

Is moving a longer term option? Rural living is great for lots of people with lots of different circumstances, but with young children and not driving is it really the right thing for you? Am just thinking about when they’re a bit older and have parties and kids clubs in other locations and whatnot and how you’ll manage with that? But obviously you’d have more options workwise too if the travel wasn’t such a blocker?

 

[Chrdeoi]

I'm a single parent to 3, aged 2, 6 and 9. I have them 24/7 for months at a time. I live fairly rurally I don't drive. My two primary aged kids get a taxi to school in the next village. Toddler is at home with me.
The plan was to return to work when youngest turned 2 or 3 and work around my partner's shifts ..then he left. It's been about 6 months now and I have no idea what I can do for work. As I have no support with childcare it really needs to be remote working or school hours (but even this would be a struggle with travel)
Obviously yes, I should learn to drive, but it's a vicious cycle as I can't afford to without a job. There are no school hour jobs available within easy distance, everything else is a 40min bus journey which means leaving earlier in the morning than breakfast club opens (taxi also won't accommodate this - it's standard school hours only)
I feel like an absolute failure. I don't have any hobbies I can turn into a business, have no recognised qualifications beyond a-levels - I do have quite a lot of experience in supervisory roles within retail, and plenty of administrative experience across a few sectors.
Can't even turn to OF as I'm an old fatty

Has anyone got any ideas? Things I haven't thought of?

 

[50degreesnorth]

Hello! I’m a single mum who lives very rurally. Tbh when they were little it was just too much for me to be able to work at the same time. I did return to the workplace when they were older but that didn’t work out for health reasons and now I’m self-employed.

I do drive and I think your priority should be getting your license- work aside, you’re very vulnerable not having your own transport and it could lead to making a crappy decision like going out with a dodgy bloke just because he has a car…

Check out whether there are any local organisations who might be able to give you a grant to do this. I know in my locality there is an organisation who will pay for anyone to have lessons + test - and the council (or related type service - business gateway???) would give out grants for the same thing.

Alternatively, if you need a bit of breathing room regarding UC for when your youngest turns 3, you could look into going self-employed. There’s a bit of jiggery-pokery going on there in that you’ll need to report your expenses monthly and they’ll only give you 12 months to become profitable. But… if you start doing your research now then you could go for it just before your youngest turns 3 and/or they expect you back at work.

I know you say you have no skills - but I bet you do and it’s just your confidence has taken a real beating.

Were you to go self-employed AND have that license it would allow you to pick up a few hours in a “job” and at the same time you could even do dog-walking, grass cutting for OAPs, whatever until you figure it out or times are better.

Don’t rush into self-employment (and you don’t need a Ltd company) - figure it all out first - and, as announcing this is a “payment blocker” which requires an in person interview - you’ll need to time this carefully in terms of when you get your payment.

For now, make sure you go through the child maintenance service - I was way too “nice” to my ex for years as I didn’t want him to kick off. Now I can just press the “he didn’t pay” button and they call him… and, if you can- start sticking a tenner a week away towards your driving lessons/new life.

 

[Chrdeoi]

Thank you for replying!

I haven't ever heard of anything like that for driving, but I will give it a Google and see what I can find.

You're probably right about my confidence, it's at an all time low, anxiety currently is crippling and I barely leave the house so that definitely makes the prospect of a new job or trying to start something up myself, seem impossible!

I'll do some research into self employed and the type of things I could give a go/what I would need to do for it