Signs your husband no longer loves you

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Ok so here goes , myself and my husband have been together for 8 years , married 4 , have 4 children all together, but have no children together . Recently he shows me absolutely no affection, and I mean none , I couldn’t tell you the last time he kissed me? , never mind hugged me . I have questioned him about this , he just says he’s tired from work . He does have a hard job and I am furloughed , even so he comes home to a clean house every night and tea ready on the table for him ( which is the same as when I was working as I worked shorter shifts ) . When is it acceptable to say , enough is enough? I’m late 20’s and he’s slightly older , I’m really beginning to think he has no feelings what so ever for me
 
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For what it's worth the only advice I can give you is this.. if you still love him and feel the relationship is worth salvaging / keeping than take all the focus off him and put it back on yourself.

Men take you for granted (some of them)and often the more you do for them they more they because desensitized to it. Make time for yourself, duck his tea get out and exercise once or twice a day take time in your appearance focus on your kids do your hair and make up for yourself (not him) take up a hobby , try for a promotion when back at work and fall back in love with yourself (advice is only applicable if you haven't been doing any of these things).these are just ideas btw.

If you get no response from him and interest back on board hes out I'm afraid. But if he starts getting interested again then he has become like this because he is simply taking you for granted. I'm telling you now treat them mean and keep them keen but he is your husband so no one expects you treat him mean.. just treat him as if your not even bothered and somewhat indifferent. Focus on yourself and the answer will follow..
 
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Is it just the physical affection that is missing? Are you getting along normally in other areas of your life? What were things like before - were you quite tactile?

has anything changed or happened - illness/weight gain (or loss)/financial issues/arguments

if he won’t open up to you verbally could you perhaps write him a letter?
 
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Ok so here goes , myself and my husband have been together for 8 years , married 4 , have 4 children all together, but have no children together . Recently he shows me absolutely no affection, and I mean none , I couldn’t tell you the last time he kissed me? , never mind hugged me . I have questioned him about this , he just says he’s tired from work . He does have a hard job and I am furloughed , even so he comes home to a clean house every night and tea ready on the table for him ( which is the same as when I was working as I worked shorter shifts ) . When is it acceptable to say , enough is enough? I’m late 20’s and he’s slightly older , I’m really beginning to think he has no feelings what so ever for me
I’m really sorry your going through this and feel free to pm if needed. I honestly think you need to speak to him face to face rather than discussing this on a forum. Only because it will make you more paranoid and no one can give you the correct answer. Xx
 
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For what it's worth the only advice I can give you is this.. if you still love him and feel the relationship is worth salvaging / keeping than take all the focus off him and put it back on yourself.

Men take you for granted (some of them)and often the more you do for them they more they because desensitized to it. Make time for yourself, duck his tea get out and exercise once or twice a day take time in your appearance focus on your kids do your hair and make up for yourself (not him) take up a hobby , try for a promotion when back at work and fall back in love with yourself (advice is only applicable if you haven't been doing any of these things).these are just ideas btw.

If you get no response from him and interest back on board hes out I'm afraid. But if he starts getting interested again then he has become like this because he is simply taking you for granted. I'm telling you now treat them mean and keep them keen but he is your husband so no one expects you treat him mean.. just treat him as if your not even bothered and somewhat indifferent. Focus on yourself and the answer will follow..
Can’t really add anything to this but if someone really loves you I don’t believe you question their love for you ever. if your affectionate side hasn’t faded towards him And really ask yourself if your as affectionate as maybe the beginning of the relationship or your the only one who is trying because sometimes you don’t realise your just as bad an waiting for them to change first. It normally is a case of the lazy selfish bastards get comfortable an take advantage. But if you so genuinely feel the relationship is salvageable go an work on yourself try some things Melmoo has suggested you can’t go wrong.
 
The more we do for these men, the more they take us for granted and just expect it.

We make a rod for our own back
 
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We have always got on ok , we would normally have minor fall outs about silly things but that would only go on for about a few hours . Iv put a bit of weight on as I’m not as active as I normally would be , and Iv stopped wearing a full face of make up and had my hair extensions removed , I’m normally very done up . I don’t really see this as a big thing now Iv gone au natural . He has always told me how naturally beautiful I am and told me he prefers me with no false lashes , make up and hair extensions , this is making me sound as if I have let me self go . I have not , I still take pride in my appearance even if I have stoped with the full slap !
 
Could there be someone else? I know this isn't what you will want to think about, but in the interest of trying to help you, I just wonder if this is something you have thought about? It really concerns me how many married men out there go online looking for other women and if they find it, they'll stop any sort of affection towards their wife because it's going elsewhere. That's just one thing to think about, but if you completely trust him and believe he is a faithful man then please disregard this part of my message ❤

As a previous poster has said, men can take women for granted SO easily and when there are children on the scene it's very common for any sort of spark to diminish from the relationship. I'd say there's 2 ways you could go about this - you could either stop doing what you're doing, stop being that devoted loving wife and take more time for you. Become more independent, do your own thing, don't always have his tea ready, be too busy for him and see if he suddenly takes a step back and notices.
The other thing to do is to sit down and have a real heart to heart with him; tell him exactly how you feel, tell him about your doubts. Don't hold back and see if you can sort things out that way.
 
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I k
Can’t really add anything to this but if someone really loves you I don’t believe you question their love for you ever. if your affectionate side hasn’t faded towards him And really ask yourself if your as affectionate as maybe the beginning of the relationship or your the only one who is trying because sometimes you don’t realise your just as bad an waiting for them to change first. It normally is a case of the lazy selfish bastards get comfortable an take advantage. But if you so genuinely feel the relationship is salvageable go an work on yourself try some things Melmoo has suggested you can’t go wrong.

The thing is that we need to remember that life takes over and you do become tired from work and all the other crap going on. The passion wanes and you know what sometimes we do question our love for our partner from time to time.

But I am telling you this from experience do not write him letters, have 'talks' or ask him if he still loves you.

He needs a kick up the arse and a reminder of the boss witch you are. Treat him with indifference and focus on yourself and see what happens ..worst case if it doesn't work out you have reminded YOURSELF of who you are and will be more confident to make it on your own. Put him completely out of your head for one month and focus on yourself with a list of goals each day / week and I am convinced you will be in a different headspace. Men are like dogs they smell the fear (of you losing them) and are in awe of those not afraid to lose them. Sorry if people dont agree with this but it took me many years to realise that men put you first when you put YOURSELF FIRST xxx
 
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Could it maybe to do with the current situation, I know my partner has been coming home even more exhausted than he normally is (having to remember certain restrictions, stress, just generally worrying about it!)

We are kind of just drifting through this pandemic, he’s knackered from work, I’m knackered from being home with the kids 24/7, if it’s a recent thing maybe ask him how he’s feeling? X
 
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Could it maybe to do with the current situation, I know my partner has been coming home even more exhausted than he normally is (having to remember certain restrictions, stress, just generally worrying about it!)

We are kind of just drifting through this pandemic, he’s knackered from work, I’m knackered from being home with the kids 24/7, if it’s a recent thing maybe ask him how he’s feeling? X
He is definitely stressed from work . And I think ( although he has not said ) he is very envious of me being on furlough . It’s funny how men think women staying at home is easy? , Thank you all lovely’s for your advice , I was expecting a lot of women to reply back saying yes my husband ignores me too !! Then I would have felt a slight better , ha ha
 
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He is definitely stressed from work . And I think ( although he has not said ) he is very envious of me being on furlough . It’s funny how men think women staying at home is easy? , Thank you all lovely’s for your advice , I was expecting a lot of women to reply back saying yes my husband ignores me too !! Then I would have felt a slight better , ha ha
If it’s any consolation, I ignore my husband most of the time 😂 like I say it’s been a very trying 3 months! 🙈🙈
 
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If you have good communication then maybe he is just telling you the truth. If he was affectionate before then I'm sure he will be affectionate again after he feels less stress. Try not to let it get to you when he says he envies you. I'm sure he doesn't mean that you have it easy, just that he doesn't like his current work situation. The grass always seems greener after all.

Personal but in the height of the pandemic I too have felt deflated and couldn't bring up much physical affection for my husband. It wasn't a loss of love at all. Just mental exhaustion. He did give me space knowing I didn't want cuddles etc. He just picked up more of the house work when he saw I wasn't up to it. It passed and we are making up for lost time :)

These have been some strange months and everyone will cope differently. Everyone can give their advice on how they handle their husbands but you know best how you and your husband communicate. After 8 years you've probably solved a few problems already, what worked in the past to put you guys on the right track again?
 
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I k



The thing is that we need to remember that life takes over and you do become tired from work and all the other crap going on. The passion wanes and you know what sometimes we do question our love for our partner from time to time.

But I am telling you this from experience do not write him letters, have 'talks' or ask him if he still loves you.

He needs a kick up the arse and a reminder of the boss witch you are. Treat him with indifference and focus on yourself and see what happens ..worst case if it doesn't work out you have reminded YOURSELF of who you are and will be more confident to make it on your own. Put him completely out of your head for one month and focus on yourself with a list of goals each day / week and I am convinced you will be in a different headspace. Men are like dogs they smell the fear (of you losing them) and are in awe of those not afraid to lose them. Sorry if people dont agree with this but it took me many years to realise that men put you first when you put YOURSELF FIRST xxx
Wholeheartedly agree with this!! We tend to give up anything that we enjoy (even if it is just taking the dog for a walk on our own) to please them, to cook their dinner, to clean the house when they don't lift a finger. I have screenshot this and will keep referring back to it because you've just reminded I have a life as well that's just as worthy as his.
 
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Wholeheartedly agree with this!! We tend to give up anything that we enjoy (even if it is just taking the dog for a walk on our own) to please them, to cook their dinner, to clean the house when they don't lift a finger. I have screenshot this and will keep referring back to it because you've just reminded I have a life as well that's just as worthy as his.
It's so easy to let things slip and not focus on yourself. As women we revert to type and put the needs of our partners before ourselves. It goes back to chemistry in the end.. to stay interested men have to ultimately find you attractive / sexy. There is nothing sexier than a woman who doesn't really need you, has her own tit going on and makes herself a priority. I am speaking from experience. I have been that woman in the past.. do you still love me , do you still want to be with me , can we have a talk..

When you focus on yourself everything else falls in to place. Sounds easy but its constant work with the relationship you have with yourself and it's not easy but very worthwhile. Your whole mindset changes when you begin to focus on yourself, in work relationships physical and mental health etc. Xxx
 
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My husband is autistic and I am very tactile.
He definitely responds better to me 'playing hard to get' I focus on myself and then he misses my affection. He definitely takes it for granted without realising. When I stop trying to get his attention, hes the one that comes running.

I 1000% agree with the poster that said to focus on yourself.
If that doesn't work, then have a chat. But also keep in mind that we are in the midst of a pandemic, it may be nothing to do with how he feels about you and could just genuinely be exhausted. The atmosphere across the entire planet is very intense at the minute, and there is no sense of normal.
 
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The world is absolutely mental at the moment, unless you turn off the news and social media. Its bound to have a huge impact on everyone in different ways. At this moment in time i would hold fire (argh) on making any big judgements or decisions on anything. Just talk and keep communicating and keep surviving.
 
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Sorry to hear that you are experiencing this.
Does he make / respond to any conversation? Show any interest in the children?
Is it possible that he could be depressed?
It must be very difficult, at home all day at the moment - with four children to take care of.
 
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I have been shielding for weeks now and still don’t really feel safe enough to start seeing the outside world. My boyfriend, who I have been with for three years and living together for 2.5 years, has been doing his best to keep me safe and has been running errands for us regularly. I have been furloughed but he is still working from home. He very kindly bought me an iPad to keep me entertained. I think that he is starting to get fed up of being cooped up at home. He, like everyone, is missing his family and friends. We don’t live near either of our families, so meeting up outside is not an option sadly. He has been to play golf with his friend once.

He has begun taking his work stress out on me. His office space during this time is in between our bedroom and en suite. It’s realistically the only space that we had to build a desk in. He is quite senior at his company and has been doing 7:30 to 18:00 most days. He snaps at me a lot and calls me lazy because I’m not working, which was out of my control. I am revising and preparing for my finance exams at the moment and cooking and preparing lunch and dinner for him 5 days out of 7. I’m trying new recipes for variety and he seems appreciative of this, but that is really as far as his kindness goes at the moment. Most of the time he treats me as though I am in the way - he even takes issue with me walking behind him whilst he is on a video call with work. I can offer him a drink whilst he is working and he snaps at me. He’s started smoking weed every night to cope with his work stress so when I do get to spend time with him in the evenings, he isn’t really himself. He’s a giggly, sillier version, which the first few times were fine, but it has now been every day for 2 weeks. It’s really upsetting and I suggested that he ask his work if he could work from the office because nobody else is there and the internet connection is better. I just really feel like we need some space. I hate hearing him be nice to everyone else on the phone, whether that be work contacts or family and friends and comparing that with the way he speaks to me. I’ve told him that I feel unappreciated and he doesn’t seem to acknowledge that there is a problem. 🙁

OP, I’m sorry that you are feeling the way you are. I think lockdown is affecting everyone differently.
 
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I definitely would recommend for you to read
-why men love witches
- men are from Mars woman are from Venus
These books completely changed the way I acted in relationships in a good way.